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In: Anal play, Mrs Lion Comments, Oral Sex, Punishment

[Mrs. Lion- This post was originally scheduled for yesterday. Merry Christmas everyone!!!]

Last night Lion spilled food on his shirt. It wasn’t a bad spill but a spill nonetheless. He needed a funishment. I decided to soap his mouth. Unfortunately, I then went to do something that should have been simple that took far longer than it should have and I lost track of time. When I finally removed the soap it had been fifteen minutes. That’s far too long. Lion said he started to feel burning. I should have set a timer. Luckily, there was only minimal damage.

Since this was a funishment, I didn’t feel any need to delay play. I pulled out a butt plug, the lube and a glove. I had Lion kneel on the bed and I started off with two fingers. I’m trying to ease into things each time. His butt may eventually remember to relax, but for now it needs time to adjust. I used the largest training butt plug and then went back to three fingers, and then four. Between wiggling my fingers inside him and moving them in and out, I was able to get four fingers up to my knuckles and I even got my thumb in for a bit.

In order to do this more effectively, I need to give Lion an enema beforehand. I don’t find it particularly disgusting to encounter poop, but it will definitely be more comfortable for Lion. However, if he wants me to use an ungloved hand, he will need to be cleaned out. I’m good with the glove so far. I think it slides more easily.

Lion thought I stopped too soon. He said he was able to go on longer. I didn’t stop because I thought he was done. I stopped because I was done. I don’t know how long we were at it, but it felt like long enough to me. We’ll try again tonight.

[Lion — It wasn’t that I wanted to push Mrs. Lion, I just wanted to let her know that I was still up for more. She is really doing a great job training me. We never got this far in the past.]

I also decided to continue the oral experiment. I was torn between that and using the finger vibrator. Ultimately, I decided that Lion loves oral and I’m kind of partial to it too. I’m pretty sure Lion was happy with my decision. He was making some nice noises. I thought maybe he’d make it to the edge, but he didn’t quite. No problem. We’ll try that again tonight too.

Lion made the comment that I’d given both ends of him attention. Yessiree! His tail end will get more tonight and, if necessary, his top half will too.

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In: Lioness 4.0, Anal play, Female led relationship with discipline, Lion's Journal

Merry Christmas! Santa Lion was good to me this year. While Mrs. Lion and I didn’t have a tree this Christmas — no kids around and too much unpacking to do — it didn’t stop us from enjoying the holiday spirit. On Monday night we had leftover Chinese takeout. When we get Chinese food, we always get a little more than we need plus an extra container of wonton soup.

It was a little chilly in the kitchen, so I had a T-shirt on. Big mistake! As you know, I’m not the neatest eater. It didn’t take me long to splash some soup on my shirt. To my dismay, a stain appeared. Mrs. Lion gave me that special look that means she noticed and I’m in trouble.

Sure enough, after dinner, Mrs. Lion invited me into the bathroom. She had thoroughly lathered up her hands. She told me open my mouth and soaped the inside of it very thoroughly. Then she inserted a bar of soap (one of her stubs) and told me to bite. I did.

It felt like hours as I stood over the sink, white foam dripping from my chin. Fortunately, the Dove hypoallergenic soap is almost tasteless. So it wasn’t very bad having a mouth full of it. The only problem came after it had been in my mouth for a while. It started to burn.

We’ve had this problem before with keeping soap in my mouth too long. Soap, even gentle soap, is alkaline and can burn the delicate lining of the mouth if left inside too long. We’ve learned that 10 minutes is a safe-but-effective length of time to savor soapy flavor. I think it might be a good idea for Mrs. Lion to select a more flavored soap. I suppose it would be safe to go back to the dreaded Ivory Soap so long as my duration is kept to 10 minutes or less. I’m famous for offering suggestions that make things worse for me. I don’t know why I keep doing it.

Anyway, Monday night had a full program of lion fun. Following the not-so-pleasant mouth soaping, we went directly to a session of anal training. I can’t tell what Mrs. Lion is doing back there. I can only tell that it feels full and hurts a little. She’s gotten very good at keeping the pain level low while expanding my horizons, so to speak. She told me that she got four fingers in all the way to her knuckles as well as some of her thumb. This is much more than I have taken before.

In all things Lion, it’s clear that the trick is consistency and persistence. When Mrs. Lion tells me to get on my knees for anal training, I’ve learned that she will use me until I reach a point that satisfies her for the session. It’s not about what I want anymore. I may have suggested doing this, but that’s the end of my involvement. After that, my role is to get in position and docilely accept whatever Mrs. Lion wishes to do.

My role as the docile recipient extends to pleasure too. Since I began having trouble getting to the edge, Mrs. Lion has decided that sexual stimulation no longer includes automatic edging. Now, like her anal activities, she stimulates my penis until she decides she’s done. If it means that I get an orgasm, that’s fine with her. If it means that I just get very aroused and frustrated, that’s even better. The point is that while these activities are for my benefit, they are completely at Mrs. Lion’s pleasure. I no longer have a vote in how long or how much I get. I should just consider myself lucky that I get attention at all.

The best gift this year, and every other year for almost 2 decades, is Mrs. Lion’s love. This past year has been the most difficult in my life. Thanks to my spinal surgery and glaucoma coming together, I’ve lost considerable ability to do things I’ve taken for granted all my life. Mrs. Lion has taken wonderful care of me. She’s had to shoulder substantially more work than she normally does. She has done it without complaint. She’s done everything necessary to keep me healthy and happy.

She’s also learned how to effectively deal with me as my disciplining wife. Her increasing assumption of control, especially in terms of the things she does for me, is teaching me how to be more docile. I’ve learned that I can provide input, but it’s largely ignored when things are happening. This is a wonderful gift. It’s exactly what I need, even if it isn’t what I like at the time.

You’d think that activities like anal training would be just fun BDSM. It’s much more than that for me. Aside from being something that I like, it’s also a way of teaching me to submit. Now that Mrs. Lion has assumed full control, the time I spend simply accepting what she wants to give is very satisfying.

I think it’s important to get past labels. I am not just “a submissive”. I don’t think there is any such thing anyway. It’s far more complicated than that. I’m feeling great emotional satisfaction in surrendering. It didn’t feel like real surrender when I could call the shots. Yes, Mrs. Lion could withhold orgasms as long as she wished, but I did set the ground rules. I expected to be edged every time she played with my penis. Similarly, I expected anal training to end when it got a bit uncomfortable. I expected to be able to tell her I wasn’t in the mood to do it on a given day and she would put away the toys.

She believed that since the play was for my benefit, I should be able to decide whether or not we did it at any given time. I should also be able to decide when I’ve had enough. I think she finally understands that that isn’t the point. I may say I want anal training and she may agree to do it. My hope was that once she agreed, everything else was completely out of my hands.

Now, she gets out her gloves, lube, and toys; then tells me to get on my knees. She no longer gives me an opportunity to tell her I’m not in the mood. It’s not about my mood, it’s about the availability of my butt for training. This is exactly the way I hoped things would go. I think this is the beginning of lioness 4.0. What a wonderful Christmas gift!

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In: Lion's Journal, Female led relationship with discipline, Femdom, Power Exchange, Punishment
lion spanked by heart paddle

Things are a little different around here. I’m not claiming that Mrs. Lion has morphed into lioness 4.0. It’s nothing that drastic. But there is a change that I sense. It’s subtle and I’m not sure that Mrs. Lion is even consciously aware of it. Let me explain. Most every night, Mrs. Lion will come over and snuggle with me and will tease me sexually. Until recently, she teased me until I reached the edge of orgasm several times. In the last few weeks, it’s been very difficult to get me to the edge. I can’t explain it, but it’s been very difficult. In the last week or so, she stopped trying. Essentially, she played with my penis, or should I say her weenie, for a while until she decided she was done.

She stopped worrying about whether or not I reached the edge. Her recent program of oral stimulation follows the same pattern. She gets me very excited and stops whenever she decides she’s done enough. The big change is that she doesn’t worry about my reaction.

At the same time, she’s been taking a more matter-of-fact view of discipline. Most recently, I forgot to do one of my chores: I didn’t get the coffeepot set up for the next morning. I also forgot to remind her that Saturday was a punishment day. In a very ordinary, routine way, after her shower on Sunday night, Mrs. Lion told me to get into position to be spanked. She got her paddle and proceeded. She stopped for a bit because there was some blood. It turned out it was just a couple of tiny spots, so she continued.

Before she started, she moved my punishment stool into a corner near the bedroom. After my spanking she told me to go sit on my stool facing the corner. She was kind this time because she removed the coir welcome mat from the stool. I just had to sit on rough, stair tread tape. She made me stay there for a very uncomfortable 10 minutes. When I got up she commented that my butt was very red. I could feel the heat.

My point is that she treats this is a routine part of her day. It gives me a sense that she has internalized her disciplinary role. Additionally, as you may have noticed in a recent post, she told me I was a bad boy. In an email yesterday, I referenced the fact that it hurt to sit down. She replied that was because I was a bad boy. I wrote back that I would try hard to be good.

I like this change. I don’t think Mrs. Lion perceives me differently. I just think that she’s more fully into her role. All of us play different roles in life. These roles aren’t fake the way actors create characters in a play. They are the way we relate to each other and to different situations. For example, in terms of my relationship with Mrs. Lion, she is my disciplining wife. That means wherever she chooses to impose rules, I must follow them. Failing to follow them results in punishment. At other times I am her husband and partner.

These roles exist in parallel. I can be offering my opinion and acting as Mrs. Lion’s partner and then, I say something that crosses a line. At that point Mrs. Lion’s disciplining wife role surfaces and she disciplines me. It’s not very complex at all. It just takes time, patience and a lot of love to make it work.

Mrs. Lion and I were talking about spanking on Sunday night. She had patted my bottom gently and commented that was probably harder than my first spanking from her. I asked her why she was so gentle that first time. She told me that she didn’t want to hurt me. It’s taken a lot of years for her to change her approach. Now, when she spanks me she wants to hurt me. She knows that it’s necessary for me to feel her displeasure. Her focus is on the technique to most effectively give me a sore bottom that will continue hurting for a day or two afterward.

It’s not that she likes to hurt me. She’s learned that she has to spank me with enough intensity to deter me from future infractions. A good example of this is my continuing problem with remembering Saturday punishment day. Normally, forgetting that I should remind her would get me one of those little funishments. However, I have forgotten at least three out of the last five weeks. She felt that a more meaningful punishment was called for. So, I got spanked.

That spanking made a real impression on me. I can tell you that I made a special point of reminding her that Monday was punishment day and first thing Monday morning I set up the coffee pot for Tuesday. I consider this very fair. After all, I’ve been asking Mrs. Lion to be completely consistent in terms of helping me improve my behavior. She has worked hard to do this. Shouldn’t I work equally hard to do the things she wishes? I think so. My penalty for failing is physically painful. Hers is probably more severe; she feels guilty for not doing what she knows I need.

We both have very positive incentives as well. She lets me know she’s pleased when I’m a good boy. I know she feels good when she sees how happy she makes me in her role as my disciplining wife.

The biggest change is that all of this used to be more artificial like a BDSM scene. It didn’t feel to me like it was a normal part of our lives. It was something that Mrs. Lion did because she knew I wanted it. Her role felt divided from her normal day-to-day behavior. Now, it doesn’t feel that way anymore. She’s my disciplining wife all the time as well as being my partner and lover. Just as sexual control has become a natural part of our lives, I think that our disciplinary relationship has reached that level as well.

I’m not claiming that we’ve arrived. Mrs. Lion still has to work on letting me know when I say things that annoy her. We still have to integrate administration of punishment more smoothly into our lives. Right now, it’s a sort of event that happens many hours after the offense. I think eventually we will reach the point when Mrs. Lion will just lead me into the bedroom after I say something or do something wrong, tell me to assume the position, and administer my punishment. I don’t know how far we are from that step. I think when she does that, we’ve reached lioness 4.0. I think that will be when she has completely integrated her role as disciplining wife into her day to day activities.

There are two steps before she reaches that point. The first is becoming aware of and reacting to things that annoy her. Up until now, she simply growls a little if she has any reaction at all. When she begins letting me know what I’ve been doing in a more disciplinary way, I believe that we will both experience another change. This change will be very positive for me. Just as I learned to keep assigned chores top of mind, I will become much more consciously aware of the way I speak to her. I think it will overflow into the way I speak to others as well. I will learn to be much more respectful and polite. I’m not going to like it in the beginning, but I believe it will make me a better person.

By:
In: Body Waxing, Mrs Lion Comments, Punishment, Spanking

Lion survived his punishment, but he bled all over my paddle again. I think his buns are just not used to being swatted anymore. I’ve been too nice. I really do need to “catch” him doing the things he’s obviously doing. I’ve been growling but I need to let my paddle do the talking.

I finished the Lion waxing yesterday. I’m sure I missed patches. I always do, but I tell Lion he gets what he paid for. I told Lion he should pay to have someone do his legs. I’ll do the upper thighs but I hate doing his legs. He says he’s fine if I do his whole thigh and leave the rest furry. I think that looks silly and that means I still have to do legs. At least it will be a while before I have to do any of it again.

And, of course, Lion was horny. I don’t think he liked it very much when I just did a drive-by with my hand. His breath would quicken as I got close and then I’d stop short. Then I’d do it again. Eventually I touched him but I never actually stroked him. I’m sure he was frustrated but not the good kind of frustrated. Too bad. I waxed him and spanked him. That’s a lot of attention even if it wasn’t the kind of attention he was hoping for.

This morning, Lion reminded me it’s punishment day right away. He’s not taking any chances on forgetting again. He got the coffee ready too. He really does try to follow the rules.

My task now is to make sure I enforce the rules. When he interrupts or annoys me, I need to tell him. I know he knows he’s doing it. I don’t think he does it on purpose, but I’m sure he’s waiting for me to catch him when he does it. I’ll work on it. Now that his shoulder hurts less, maybe I’ll have less sympathy for him. He may still be a wounded Lion but he’s not in as much pain. I guess he’s fair game again. (I’m not really sure I was lenient because he was hurting, but it sounds like a good excuse.)