We pick up a lot of sayings from TV shows. On “Mom”, they talk about one of the supporting characters making a disappointed sheep face. Lion did that to me yesterday. Well, let’s just say I was trying to avoid his disappointed sheep face.

I cleaned up quite a bit. I still have a lot to do, but I did make a dent. When Lion was getting ready to make dinner, he noticed that the bottom part if the blender was where it shouldn’t be. He started to say something and then thought better of it. He’s already on thin ice when it comes to saying the house is messy. He went to take a shower and, to avoid his disappointed sheep face, I put the blender parts back together (I was waiting for the container to dry after making doggie ice cream) and put it away. I also cleaned off the entire window seat. I don’t think we’ve seen it since we moved in a year ago.

In the past, when Lion has complained about the kitchen table being full of junk, I’ve cleaned up my part of the mess and left his for him to do. It’s been mostly his stuff. I think that’s still true, but he’s less able to clean it up himself now. I never really thought it was fair for him to complain if it was mostly his stuff or if it was our stuff that he put there. We’re both bad about putting things on flat surfaces.

Anyway, the window seat is clean. The table is cleaner. And the stack of recipes I set aside for Lion to go through is back on the table. I feel like I’m fighting a losing battle. Maybe we need a five second rule for flat surfaces. Maybe if it doesn’t belong there, it needs to be put away within a day. I’ll probably be the one moving it even if it isn’t mine, but I need to know where it goes if it’s Lion’s.

This isn’t Lion’s problem alone. He’s just more vocal about things being messy. I’m a slob. I don’t care if that bag of vitamins we bought at Costco is still in the bag on the floor of the kitchen two weeks later. I don’t expect Lion to clean up my mess though. I only left his kitchen table mess because he always made it seem like the whole mess was mine. We both need to do better.

So it looks like we have a new rule. Anything on the bed, kitchen counter, table, window seat, etc. that doesn’t belong there has to be moved within one day. If it doesn’t have a home, why did we buy it? “I don’t know where we want to put it” shouldn’t be a thing. Find a home for it, even if it winds up in the pantry. (It’s the catch all and is looking like it needs to be cleaned again. Guess whose job that is.)

Obviously, I’m not going to get punished for leaving crap around. But I do think it’s fair for Lion to be able to nag me about it. If it’s my widget, then I need to take care of it. If I brought home X, I need to put X away. And Lion shouldn’t be punished for nagging me about it. He will, however, be punished if he orders “this really cool thing I thought we could try” and it languishes where it doesn’t belong.

This time it’s a rule for both of us. Maybe a day isn’t realistic so we can tweak it as we go, but for now it’s a day. What do you think, Lion? Fair?

[Lion replies — Let me see if I understand this. I’m allowed to nag to get things put away if they are Mrs. Lion’s or general household stuff. If I don’t put away things I buy or order as well as my possessions within 24 hours, I get spanked. Ok, that sounds about as fair as things get around here.]

When I think about sex toys, my mind never drifts toward pillows. Yet, Mrs. Lion and I have long struggled to find a really good position for me when I’m spanked or when she wishes to peg me. I always thought that if I was on my knees, I would be presenting my rear perfectly for her use. The first time we tried this when I had earned a spanking, I was flat on my tummy in seconds. It hurt too much for me to stay in that position.

We tried stacking bed pillows on the edge of the bed with me lying on top of them in order to get me at a height where my bottom was stretched tight and presented nicely. They were too squishy and just couldn’t hold me still.

The problem is simple but very difficult to solve. Mrs. Lion likes me draped over the edge of the bed. In that position, my rear end isn’t stretched it all. Some folds of skin even develop. The area Mrs. Lion needs to spank — the lower half of my butt and my upper thighs — is draped below the edge of the bed. It’s uncomfortable for Mrs. Lion to try to spank me over her lap. That position stretches the butt nicely and puts it in an easily accessible location for spanking but doesn’t work for Mrs. Lion.

I had received an email from a company that sells very interesting toys. It’s called Tabutoys. One item on their site was brand-new to me. It is a triangular-shaped foam pillow explicitly designed to put the rear end in a very accessible position: the Pillo. The manufacturer intended it to allow a woman to present her rear for penetration. However, it seemed to me that this product might be the answer to our spanking and anal challenges. I ordered one.

It arrived beautifully packed in a large black box. The positioning pillow itself is made of a hard, yet-yielding foam. It has a waterproof inner cover with a soft fabric cover on the outside. The outside cover is washable and the inside cover protects the foam and can be wiped off if needed. My theory was that if I put the pillow on the edge of the bed so that my thigh joints draped over the edge, my butt would be higher and because of the triangular shape of the pillow, it would be at an angle more accessible to Mrs. Lion.

I was concerned that it might not be wide enough to accommodate me or it might not be firm enough to actually hold me in position. It turned out that it was plenty wide and was absolutely firm enough to keep me right where she wants me. We were both surprised at how well it actually works. Its first use was for a punishment spanking. It’s hard for me to be objective about this but I believe that right from the start her swats hurt more. It felt similar to the spanking I received when on my knees.

When used for fun, it provides a very firm support for anal play including pegging. Since my weight is distributed over my entire body, there is none of the fatigue I normally feel when on my knees for a long period of time. Also, because this is a stable position, the softness of the mattress doesn’t make me wobble when Mrs. Lion is using a dildo.

This product isn’t cheap. It retails for $95. It’s worth it! This rather simple design does its intended job perfectly. The quality is very good and the service from Tabutoys is excellent. What started out as an odd idea has turned out to be one of the most useful additions to our kink collection. It solves a very real problem for us.

Click here to visit the product page.

Click here for Tabutoys home page.

Apparently Lion likes it when I prove him right. I’m still not quite clear how I did it, but he says I did. First of all, I take exception to his statement that I never do more than one thing with him per day. How does he think he’s gotten punished and played with on the same day? Isn’t that doing multiple things? Aside from that, he says that realizing he annoyed me enough to punish him is the thing that proves him right.

Now, let’s just say I can put up with a lot of stuff. I’ve had kids and a previous idiot husband. Maybe Lion’s annoying me is something that has to rise to a certain level before I snap. Little bumps in the road are par for the course, but when I hit that pothole look out. One thing I especially hate is when he calls me out when I’m doing something nice. For example, I didn’t put the prickly jock strap on him because I didn’t want to interrupt him while he was writing. Wouldn’t it be stupid of me to interrupt him if I hate to be interrupted?

The problem is that once I’m annoyed, I’m annoyed at everything. It takes a bit for me to calm down. Anything that happens within that time frame that doesn’t go according to plan makes me more annoyed. Lion likes to say a spanking clears the slate. If I spanked him while I was annoyed, I don’t think it would clear the slate. Not only that, but I think I would hit him harder and care less about his yelps. That’s why I don’t want to hit him in the heat of the moment. Aside from swatting them on the diapered butt for doing something wrong, I don’t remember ever hitting my kids. But one time they had me so annoyed I told them I felt like I was going to start hitting them and if I started I wasn’t sure I could stop so they should give me some space. I don’t think it would have risen to the level of child abuse but that’s what I felt like at the time. And when Lion annoys me, it’s just best that I cool off before I punish him.

I guess, since I was proving Lion right anyway, I decided to use more than one paddle to whomp him. I chose the bloodwood paddle with the rectangular head because it has stair tread on one side. I chose a thicker spoon-shaped paddle. And I chose a rubber paddle with a split head. I know the rubber paddles hurt a lot. The spoon-shaped packs a hefty punch. And the bloodwood with stair tread hurts on an already sore butt. Another thing we tested out was a spanking pillow. It’s wedge shaped and holds his butt up a bit. It actually worked pretty well. Normally, Lion gets a fold in the skin of his left cheek. I don’t know why. The problem is that he winds up with a bright white stripe when the rest of his cheek is red. The spanking pillow eliminated that fold.

By the time I got done, Lion had a few deep purple spots. I thought he might wind up with bruises but the markings later on looked normal. Of course, a deep bruise might not actually show on the outside. But Lion is notoriously difficult to bruise so I doubt he feels anything today. I don’t remember if I’ve ever punished him two days in a row, but the day is young. He’s already talking about how much of a mess the house is. Read that as: Mrs. Lion, you’re not doing your job around here. Yup. He might just get punished two days in a row.

[Lion replies — I don’t have a sore spot today. Maybe it would be better for both of us if Mrs. Lion disregards my yelps. She sent a powerful message yesterday, don’t get me wrong. For the record, I was punished two days in a row once or twice]

Mrs. Lion said that I’ve forgotten what it’s like to be punished. It’s true that more than two weeks have passed since I’ve done anything to earn one. She said that I should probably get a punishment spanking just to remind me. She doesn’t like the idea of a maintenance spanking because it generally is too mild. I agree about that. I also agree that I probably should be reminded what’s in store for me if I get out of line. It sounds like we are completely in sync.

Then she wrote that she wanted to lock me into the spiked jockstrap to help jumpstart sex for me. Another good idea. Then, things got strange. She said that she would make me wear the prickly jockstrap for more than an hour instead of spanking me. She went on to say that she knew that it wasn’t the same thing, but that’s what she wanted to do. I was confused until I thought about how Mrs. Lion operates.

For some reason, she tends to only do one lion-related thing a day. I never figured out why, but that’s how it seems to work out. I don’t think she intends it, but it’s her pattern. So it wasn’t entirely surprising that she would only put me in the jockstrap, a BDSM activity instead of spanking me, a domestic discipline activity. I can’t see any reason why she can’t do both. I’m not in love with the idea of either, but I can’t see any relationship between the two that would cause one to disqualify the other.

Terminology aside, maintenance or punishment spankings, she has a point about reminding me what one feels like. I have a poor memory when it comes to pain. I know that I don’t like being spanked, but after a couple of weeks, the memory isn’t strong enough to act as an effective deterrent. It may seem cruel to remind me by making me suffer through one for no apparent reason. It might be like a disciplinary mental health day. It could help me avoid actually committing offenses that would earn me punishment.

In fact, my mental health could truly benefit from a seriously sore bottom. I’ve been thinking about this. First of all, it’s true that I don’t vividly remember how unhappy a disciplinary spanking makes me. Because of this, I find myself getting less focused on obedience. The chances I will get into trouble become much better.

I also lapse into a sort of inertia. I don’t actively feel Mrs. Lion’s authority. I suspect this isn’t just because I am getting lazy. I think she tends to “forget” her role if she doesn’t punish me regularly. The more time that passes between spankings, the less interested she seems to be in keeping me in strict check. It’s our old inertia issue.

For reasons I can’t exactly understand, I get a sense of love and security when Mrs. Lion is my disciplining wife. I am happier when she is firmly in control. Conversely, when she doesn’t follow through on something, I feel less secure and I worry if something is wrong with us.

None of this is pathological. I quickly get over any bad feelings. Her forgetting and not disciplining me don’t make my life worse. When she follows through and keeps me on my toes I am happier. I think she is too. It can’t feel good to forget to keep a promise. I know it feels good to her when she is actively watching for and punishing infractions.

We just have to remember what works for us and to follow through.

[Mrs. Lion replies — Well, the good news is that Lion earned a punishment not far into the afternoon. While I was reading this post, he rightly alerted me that I hadn’t put him in the prickly jockstrap before my post had published. And why was that? I was being nice enough to not interrupt him while he was writing. This is a nicety he does not share since he interrupted my reading his post. So now, I’m commenting just after the prickly jockstrap went on, he’ll get spanked in a few hours, depending on how long I feel like allowing those nasty little spikes to bite into his cock and balls.]