Lion waited 15 days for an orgasm this time around. That’s not his longest wait. I think it’s about average. I don’t know if he was looking for an orgasm or not. I guess one could argue that he’s always looking for an orgasm. On the other hand, sometimes he doesn’t want one. He wants to wait longer. Maybe he wants to be more frustrated. Too bad. I decide.

The interesting thing about last night was that, as he got closer and closer, he warned me he was going to come. I don’t know what made last night different from other times when it sneaks up on him. Was it because it was 15 days? Did I grab his balls just right? Was I sucking with just the right amount of pressure? Maybe it’s a random thing. There doesn’t have to be an answer.

When I’m about to have an orgasm, I always know. Sometimes it goes away if the stimulation changes. Sometimes I wonder why the hell it’s taking so long. I mean, it’s right there. What the hell are you waiting for? Usually, it’s just a slow buildup and then I’m over the top. There’s no sneaking up. I don’t know if that’s true for all women. I’ve never asked.

Maybe he normally feels it happening whether he warns me or not. He’s said he gets a tightening in his thigh muscle. So I guess the better question is why he decided to warn me last night. Don’t get me wrong. I liked it. There was a sense of urgency in his voice. Or maybe it was just him trying to speak while all of his muscles were working on other things. I put those muscles to good use and let him come.

[Lion comments — When I feel that thigh muscle pull, it’s too late. It is a sure sign I will ejaculate. Frustratingly, I don’t always get that signal. Unlike Mrs. Lion and other women, my arousal grows slowly at first. When ejaculation is close, I go from aroused to orgasm in seconds. I think this is true of most men. The reason I warned Mrs. Lion last night was that she had commented that sometimes she can’t tell when I am near the edge. Sometimes it sneaks up on me too. This time I knew, so I warned her.]

Yesterday, Mrs. Lion wrote that she gets closure when I do something wrong by growling at me. I don’t always notice when she does. She correctly wrote that being spanked works for me. It serves to help change my behavior and lets me feel guilt isn’t necessary. I think that guilt is the problem with growling for me. I tend to feel guilty I upset her and worry she might not love me anymore. I know that’s irrational but it is that old fear of rejection. That doesn’t mean she shouldn’t growl.

When she follows up with punishment, I feel sorry I did something wrong, but not guilty about hurting her. The two-step growl and spank technique provide each of us with what we need. It wouldn’t surprise me if other couples have discovered this too. Until Mrs. Lion wrote about this concept, it never occurred to me that she would feel satisfaction simply by growling. She is also wise enough to know that I don’t benefit from her growls.

At best, a growl is a warning. It lets me know that trouble could be ahead. Until yesterday, I think that Mrs. Lion also considered growling at me as a warning to watch myself. Now we both understand that a growl means a spanking is coming. I wonder if she can also call an inaudible? Would a dirty look be the same as a growl? I would think so.

This revelation about the value of her growls may also explain why she has been unwilling to spank me when I interrupt or do anything else that annoys her. In her mind, she has done enough. She let me know I displeased her. Now she knows that her growl is a positive step she is taking in standing up for herself, but it isn’t a teaching moment for me.

The spanking that should follow isn’t necessarily helpful to her but will move me in the right direction. Now that spanking me isn’t difficult for her to do, I assume annoying her will result in a sore bottom for me.

Lion wonders if I notice that domestic discipline works. I do. He rarely spills food on his shirt anymore. He’s learned to ask if I’ve eaten or he waits for me to tell him it’s okay to eat before he does. He tries very hard to avoid swats. I just don’t know if I see the value in it for everything, or maybe just for me.

I may not find punishing him as distasteful as I did at first, but I don’t breathe a sigh of relief once it’s over. I mean, it doesn’t wipe the slate clean as Lion has suggested. From my point of view, the act of telling him he interrupted me is enough. If I can muster the strength, for want of a better word, to tell him he’s wronged me in some way, I consider that a victory. Apparently swatting is what does it for him. For that reason, I guess spanking is all for him.

Regardless of whether or not I need to spank him for the punishment to be completed, I’ll keep doing it. He doesn’t get value from my growling at him. For this to keep working, we both need to get something from it. If I wanted sex, but never got an orgasm, I wouldn’t consider my needs met. Obviously, I wouldn’t need an orgasm every time necessarily, but I’d feel cheated over time. If I only yell at him and call it good, he won’t reap the benefits.

We’re all about teamwork. I growl and feel better. Lion gets swatted and feels better (about the slate being wiped clean, not about having a sore butt). It sounds like a beneficial compromise to me.

For the record, when I catch him breaking the easy rules, I don’t growl. I wipe the slate clean by catching him and shaking my head that he broke such a simple rule again. I mean, really? [Lion comments — For the record, she still spanks me every time, headshake or not.]

The long weekend is nearly over. Mrs. Lion will return to her office tomorrow. She will be working from home on Tuesday. I miss her when she is away. I’ve had no trouble remembering to set up the coffeepot for the next day. Apparently, being spanked for missing a day helped my memory. Even though we have been doing this for years, I’m still surprised that it works so well.

I don’t know the reason, but Mrs. Lion doesn’t have much to say about the value of domestic discipline in our lives. I’m not sure she believes it is effective in changing my behavior. I’ve always had the feeling that she does it because I want it, not because it has any serious value in our marriage. It’s true that I want it. I believe that over the years it’s proven effective in helping me change. Admittedly, the changes aren’t momentous, but they are real nonetheless.

For example, when we began, I managed to spill food on my shirt at least several times a week. I was a messy eater. When it became a spankable offense to do this, getting food on my shirt became a very rare event. Yes, I must have received dozens of spankings before the change, but the evidence is irrefutable. The same thing is true of me eating before Mrs. Lion. After it became a rule that she was to always begin eating first, before long I almost never slipped.

Just because DD helped me make these rather trivial behavioral changes doesn’t mean I think more serious issues can be cured with a spanking paddle. Fortunately, most disciplined husbands don’t need addictions cured. There are less serious issues that, if uncorrected, can hurt a marriage. I know that when I interrupt Mrs. Lion, it upsets her. She also hates it when I act like a know-it-all.

Obviously, I don’t try to do those things. They are negative habits; behaviors that should be extinguished. Punishment, like spanking, can facilitate this. It isn’t that the spanking is so horrible that I fear offending again so much I watch every word. The spanking forces me to recognize what I did. It’s unpleasant enough to help condition me to avoid what prompted it. DD is solid behavioral psychology.

At its most basic level, DD is Pavlovian; interrupt, get a sore bottom. The conditioning stimulus is spanking. As we discovered, it works. I didn’t set out to keep food off my shirt. I was conditioned to do it. It turns out that DD is an effective behavioral tool for non-addictive behaviors. I wonder if Mrs. Lion realizes this.