I am happy to report that I am 99% better. I can still feel whatever it was lurking in the background and I’m sure if I do too much, I’ll feel it, but I need to do things today. Both of us spent a few hours napping on and off yesterday while watching TV. By dinner time, neither of us was hungry and Lion’s tummy was yucky, but we ate homemade chicken soup and that seemed good for both of us. Lion’s shoulder was hurting a lot last night, so even if I was able to give him attention, he wasn’t looking for any. The pain kept him awake a lot last night.

At some point, both of us will be well enough to enjoy each other’s company again. I mean, of course, close company. We always enjoy being together, even if we aren’t touching. Luckily, Lion’s right shoulder is the one that hurts, so holding hands is still on the table. I think he needs a combination of heating pad and a different pillow to support his shoulder. He’s spent more time in bed since he wasn’t feeling well and that has exacerbated his shoulder issues.

What I’ve been writing isn’t particularly interesting lately. Those are the perils of being the play-by-play guy. If there’s no game, there’s nothing to report on. I will say that Lion made sure the coffee pot was set up for this morning. He thought he’d done it for yesterday morning. He wanted to make sure not to tempt fate. He knew sooner or later I’d feel well enough to uphold his rules. He doesn’t want that spanking bench to come out any time soon. Of course, I won’t spank him if he doesn’t feel well. He needs time to recover as well.

Today, after I’ve run errands and done some chores, I’ll look for the weighted heating pad for Lion’s shoulder. I’ve got to get him back into fighting form.

[Lion — I took a pain pill and feel fine. My shoulder doesn’t hurt when I am on the spanking bench, so no excuse for me there. I was worried about Mrs. Lion. I’m relieved she is feeling better.]

I may not feel up to this now, but I will soon enough.

I am feeling somewhat better today. However, I’m not going to be too active because I know that can change quickly. My head is still wonky but life goes on. There are errands to run and chores to do. Everything will be fine as long as I don’t do too much all at once.

I’ll let you in on a little secret. Lion didn’t set up the coffee pot again. This time I’m letting it go because I don’t feel up to spanking him and I know he’s been worried about me. So worried, in fact, that I’m always afraid to tell him I don’t feel well because he’s like a mother hen. He kept asking if I wanted to take a COVID test. He wanted me to take my temperature. I haven’t been out of the house in about a week. There’s no need to waste a COVID test. My temperature was normal. And I always ache to some extent. My head was just off (no jokes, please) and I knew I wouldn’t be able to move around enough to play with him.

I’m not promising any play tonight because I don’t know how I’ll feel. We should be able to snuggle. We didn’t last night because moving was weird. I thought being on my side might be too much.  I slept on my side and that was fine so snuggling should be back on the table. Assuming Lion’s back and shoulder don’t hurt, I should have no trouble fondling my weenie. We’ll have to play it by ear from there.

Maybe you think I’m being too nice to Lion by not punishing him for the coffee pot. Again. I might be. But I know when I feel better, I can always bring out the spanking bench “just because” I didn’t feel well enough to spank him when he got himself in trouble. He’s probably due for a “just because” spanking anyway. It can wait till I can give him the attention a proper spanking deserves.

Yes, that’s me.

My friend Julie wrote a provocative post about spanking: “Spanking Reality and Spanking Fantasy.” She talks about her inner and outer spanking lives. It’s a fascinating look at the female view of spanking. Over the years, I’ve been lucky enough to spank quite a few women. One was my live-in partner. She would be insulted if I called her that to her face. In her mind, she was my slave. That was the direction her fantasies drove her.

In fact, she was very much like Julie. She craved my hand, strap, flogger, or paddle. She didn’t like the pain but was aroused by the spanking. She claimed that she could have an orgasm just from the spanking. She didn’t during the decade we were together. There was no question that being taken in hand was a major turn-on for her.

The downside to this was that her craving for supervision and discipline was both time-consuming and annoying to me. While it was fun to beat a beautiful woman, it wasn’t something I wanted to do every day. I didn’t want to inspect every chore she completed and review her performance. That might have fueled her inner needs, but it annoyed me.

I learned a lot from my time as a top. I also learn as a bottom. I think that men and women experience domestic discipline in very different ways. Julie confirms what I’ve observed in many other women. She likes the humiliation and submission that being spanked gives her. She also works hard to avoid repeating the behavior that got her spanked. She wants to be a good girl. There is a deep connection between the desire to be punished and the need to please.

This connection tempers the approach to the sexual aspect of being punished. Imagine what would happen if the need for the humiliation and pain were so strong and constant that she worked hard to provoke her husband into more and more frequent beatings. He would decide that DD was just too much trouble and quit. That’s what happened with my partner and me.

For a while, she skipped some of her chores on purpose. She needed daily spankings. I stopped and told her that she was turning into a black hole. She tried to do better. She couldn’t. Eventually, we had to break up. I don’t think that men approach DD in quite the same way. I don’t have a traditional, submissive role to emulate. Julie can be a good wife and obey her husband. I’ve been trained to be in charge. I want Mrs. Lion to have power and use it, but I can’t surrender my role as head of the household.

We’ve found a way to make this work. The “lion” model is a good example of how nature balances power. Males instinctively avoid attacking females. The girls have no such issue. They understand that he is in charge unless he does something they truly don’t like. Then they let him know by painfully biting his rump. He can’t fight back. Sound familiar?

Mrs. Lion lets me make most of the decisions. However, she has rules and will painfully spank me if I break one. If I piss her off, my rear end pays for the indiscretion. We started with play spankings because I was turned on thinking about being spanked. We evolved into our current domestic discipline as a way to ensure that Mrs. Lion always has a voice. It works. She uses her power sparingly, but when I need to be spanked, I have a horrible time.

I still have sexy spanking fantasies. Women-spanking-men videos rarely turn me on. I’m never more than a couple of weeks away from my own experience being spanked. Sometimes I picture myself in the scene, and it is fun. I can’t masturbate, so I have no incentive to be turned on by porn. Still…

I don’t know if I was stuffy when I woke up. I don’t think so because I wondered why I was getting stuffy just after breakfast. It’s been downhill from there. I’m chilly and tired and blah. Like when Lion was sick, I wonder how it happened. The last time I was out was a week ago. I know I’ll be fine after lunch and a little rest. I have to be. There are too many things to do around here for me to be too sick.

I’m not sure about Lion, but I doubt I’ll have any energy to play with him tonight. The other night, his back hurt. Last night, his shoulder hurt. He says it’s the beginning of the end for him. It’s all downhill from here. I feel that way right now too. It’s temporary. We’ll both be back in fighting form in a day or two. In the meantime, we can snuggle and be together.

This morning Lion said he’s been very happy to have me around all the time. Me too. It’s not just because I don’t want to schlepp to work. I still have trouble getting myself motivated to get to my desk in the morning. I really like having Lion in the next room or, better yet, right next to me. We’re sappy, but we’re both grateful we get along so well. Yeah, we annoy each other from time to time, but I’m pretty sure I could count on one hand the number of fights we’ve had over the years. Only three spring to mind. I’m sure there have been others. I don’t mean minor disagreements. I mean not talking to each other fights. I get quiet when he annoys me sometimes, but he was really pissed at me those three times.

We got past that and it’s been smooth sailing ever since. Ok, maybe not so smooth at times but only because of surgeries and outside forces throwing a monkey wrench into things. Life would be boring without some turmoil, but I’d take some smooth sailing right about now, for all of us.