How To Give An Effective Spanking

effective bare bottom spanking method
Click the image to enlarge.
The blue line is around the area of the bottom that should be spanked. The pink lines are the main areas that need attention. A pattern of two swats on the outer or upper left cheek followed by four to the pink strike zone, then four to the right pink zone and finally two more to the right area. This will provide a good spanking experience. Repeat!

Spanking for misdeeds is an important part of our disciplinary relationship. It is for many couples like us. Since 2016, Mrs. Lion has been my disciplinary wife. We’ve both learned a lot about spankings, particularly punishment spankings over that time. To be completely transparent, for many years before I met Mrs. Lion, I was a sex instructor teaching BDSM techniques. One popular subject was spanking. Here is a combination of how-to and what really happened to us as we evolved. I suggest that both spanker and spankee read this post. It may help you.

When she started spanking me, I could hardly feel Mrs. Lion’s swats. She was being cautious to say the least. Over time (years!), her confidence grew and now she is comfortable making my butt a bright red. One important takeaway from this is that spankers are made, not born. Have patience, with lots of practice, you will spank with the best of them.

Spanking is easy to do, but there is a technique to give a good one. It’s a lot like pitching a baseball. First, the area above the center of the butt (see image — the blue oval is the safe zone) can be injured during a vigorous spanking. What other kind is there? So your spanking zone is inside the red box.

The “sweet spot”, the area most tender and sensitive, is in the lower third of his rear. Eight out of every dozen swats should be bestowed there. Those swats should also be significantly more intense to the ones outside the strike zone. More about this later.

As we learned the hard way, you can’t just start out full force. I rolled over and headed for the hills when Mrs. Lion did that. We learned that even a punishment spanking starts slowly. She always uses a paddle. You can use a hairbrush or other implement, but even in the beginning, hands off! Hand spankings are for BDSM play.

Follow the pattern in the picture. Two swats to the outside or top of the red box, the four much harder swats to the left sweet spot, then four more just as hard to the right sweet spot. Last, two softer to the outside area. Rinse and repeat, a lot. You may be wondering why we have an even number of swats to each area. The idea is to hit the same exact spot at least twice in a row. Repetition intensifies the sensation. If you focus all four of your sweet spot swats to the same place, you will have a strong effect on your partner. In fact, if your rhythm is two fast swats, slight pause, two more, slight pause, etc. you will set up a comfortable beat for your beating.

In the beginning, the harder sweet-spot swats won’t be all that hard, but as you go, make them more intense.  You want to build to the point that he wriggles a bit and maybe kicks his feet, just on the edge of rolling away. As you go on, he will remain reasonably still for harder swats. Keep up the pattern and rhythm. You may be going fairly slowly at first, but as the intensity grows, so should the speed.

The reason to hold to the pattern is that he will start to anticipate what is coming next. His sweet spots will be much sorer than the outer area. So as you go on, he will dread when you move to your strike zones. In my case, the right green zone usually hurts more than the left. I brace for the blows that land there. The pattern helps build that dread.

He will tell you to stop. A calm, “No, not yet,” will remind him who is in charge. The whole point of this spanking is to cause controlled pain. You may see visual signs that your task is nearly finished when you see bruising or white spots on his bottom. Avoid hitting the bruises if you can.

When you feel he has had enough to learn his lesson, then stop. Chances are good that you will want to stop too soon. Mrs. Lion says that maybe she is done and then decides she isn’t and goes on for a while longer. I hate that!

You can speed up the rhythm as you go. Just try to avoid pausing or slowing down. If he really can’t handle the level of swatting you are dishing out, then back off, but don’t stop! Less intense swats are fine if needed, but to make the strongest impression, keep that paddle swinging until you are done.

punishment stoolOnce the swatting is over, it’s a good idea to give him time to think about what just happened. Five or ten minutes in a corner with his hands behind his head gives him a nice chance to appreciate your work. You can make it longer if you wish, but less isn’t effective. Mrs. Lion will make me sit in the corner on my punishment stool. This is a wooden stool with the seat covered in a rough fabric cut from a boot-cleaning welcome mat. That really digs into my sweet spots and hurts a lot.

She will sometimes follow that with a mouth soaping. More about that in another post. I’m sure you get the idea.

When we first started out, Mrs. Lion made rules that I was sure to break often. One was that I am not allowed to spill food on my shirt. I was a pretty messy eater and had to be punished at least a couple of times a week for spilling. This gave us both a chance to learn spanking. Interestingly, as we no longer needed those “training spankings”, I stopped spilling on my shirt.

Spanking works as an educational tool once it is taken seriously. Happy teaching and learning!


  1. A good primer. I don’t have as much experience as you but agree with your post. I do like a warm-up, but my Queen seldom gives me one.

    1. Author

      You might want to refer her to the post. Much more experienced disciplinary spankers than I brought the need for warm up to my attention. With a warm up, the bottom can take much more.It seems contraintuitive to warm up for punishment,but the goal of a punishment spanking is a memorably painful experience. Spankings that were only 20 or 30 swats that started full force, are now 300 or more swats after warm up. I suffer much longer and feel a lot more pain. Go figure!

  2. I was always willing to be spanked, hoping it would result in spanking my wife. Nothing very hard, just to warm and pink up her bottom. But she had had too many harsh punishment spankings, and whippings, in her youth to let me do any kind of foreplay spanking. What a waste of a great ass! The best I could ever do was to have her on all fours with me underneath sucking her dangling nipples. (She loved any sort of nipple play.) I would stretch my left arm back between her legs, with my forearm through her pussy, and then spank her cheeks as best I could, which wasn’t much because I couldn’t develop any force. She never encouraged anything more than that, but at least she never stopped me. But she would never do me.

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