I found another mean paddle. I knew it was mean, but it’s one of the ones I brought up from the dungeon the other day. It’s a Hanson  bloodwood paddle with tread tape on it. I used both sides on Lion’s butt last night.

He started yelping almost immediately. 2.0 would have been afraid of his yelps. 3.0 just plods right along. I may have given him a break for one round but then I picked it up the next round. It’s supposed to hurt. And I can’t feel guilty for something he wants me to do. (I still do. Sometimes.)

Once his butt was starting to look leathery from the rough side of the paddle, I decided he’d had enough. But wait. There’s more. It was time for mouth soaping. And what kind of hideously stinky soap did we buy the other day? That’s right! Irish Spring. Since Lion is so sensitive to perfumes and dyes, I thought Irish Spring was a bad idea but he wanted it. And he got it. Lots of lather and horrible taste. And when I went to take it out of his mouth, he’d bitten down so hard it was stuck to his teeth. After he rinsed his mouth out, he could still taste it for hours. He was still tasting it this morning. Yuck!

About an hour after his spanking and mouth soaping, I unlocked him and edged him. It took a long time to get him to the edge. I was debating whether or not to give him an orgasm on the first try. I decided not to. But then, because he’d been working so hard to get to the edge, I gave him his orgasm on the second try. He was only going to wait until today anyway so it wasn’t a big deal to give it to him a day early. I have no idea how long he waited. I just picked a random day. [Lion — Yesterday was the eighth day.]

So last night was very eventful for Lion. He hit the trifecta. I’m just not sure which thing was win, which was place and which was show.

lion's paddleAs you may have read, I managed to rack up a total of nine days of punishment — spankings and other activities I hate. This isn’t for a single offense. I started out earning five days for repeatedly forgetting to remind Mrs. Lion of punishment days. Since I’ve had these days for years, there’s no excuse for not reminding her. She escalated from  three days of spanking, which I got a couple of weeks ago, to the present five days. On top of that, this past weekend I managed to spill food on my shirt. This added two more days. Now the total was at seven. Monday, I spilled food again. Two more days.

I don’t think any of her sentences are unfair. They just seem to be grouping together. In a way, that’s not such a bad thing. She’s getting a chance to perfect her punishment techniques and to try out different paddles. We have a very large collection. For my part, I am learning too. I am learning to take rules much more seriously. Mrs. Lion and I both realize that the rules she is currently enforcing represent trivial matters. She created them to give us both opportunities to adapt to the disciplinary lifestyle we want.

The consequence for a single offense, like spilling on my shirt is relatively small. Under our new policy, I earn two daily spankings. That’s enough to make me think more than twice about repeating the offense. Repeating it within a short time (Mrs. Lion decides how long that short time is) increases the number of spankings I will earn. Fair enough. If I commit multiple offenses, I can end up with a long string of daily spankings. That’s the situation I’m in now.

lion’s spanked butt
This is my butt after Monday’s spanking. Click image to view larger.

Everyone seems to have their own image of what constitutes a spanking. Some people see them as long, brutal affairs that end up with the person being spanked bruised and in tears. Others picture it as a BDSM scene, where the net result is a dark red bottom and a sexually aroused pair of players. Mrs. Lion’s spankings are somewhere between those two. They definitely hurt. I’m left with a red bottom that hurts for some time after she’s done. I’m one of those people who don’t mark much and what marks I get, fade quickly.

So far, we both feel good about what’s happening. A little over a week of daily spankings is no fun for me, but it isn’t something that I dread so much I want to escape. I earned them. I know they’re not supposed to be fun and they’re not. But they aren’t so horrible that I’m suffering any lasting physical or emotional damage.

I think something positive is coming out of this. In a weird kind of way, spanking is becoming a “normal” part of our relationship, very much the same way that enforced male chastity has. It’s a little difficult to put into words. To me, at least, it feels like being spanked is an expected consequence of any infraction I commit. It happens often enough not to be notable.  It’s not something to argue about or try to postpone. It’s just what happens if I slip up. I think Mrs. Lion is also seeing spanking me as a routine part of her job as my wife.

She even jokes about it sometimes. I sent her an email on Tuesday that I was concerned about how my boss might feel about some work I’ve been doing. Her reply was:

“And know that I’m behind you no matter what. (Might be with a paddle, but… )”

That sort of inside joke is a sign that there is no stress over our district in every relationship. If you read back in the blog a few years, you’ll see that Mrs. Lion’s feelings about spanking me were quite different. She didn’t consider spanking a routine part of her life and she actively disliked the idea of hurting me. I’m sure she still doesn’t like hurting me, but she understands and accepts that in her role, spanking me, whether it hurts or not, is an expected routine chore.

We have some readers who consider that consider my spankings a form of domestic abuse. It absolutely isn’t. I asked Mrs. Lion to take on this role. Anyone who has read this blog for some time knows that I encourage her to become stricter with me. I am eternally grateful that she has worked very hard to perfect her role as my disciplining wife.

I think you either get it or you don’t. It’s difficult for some people to understand why I would encourage my wife to be a disciplinarian. I think we both benefit greatly as a result of our disciplinary relationship. You may think we’re crazy; perhaps we are. We are happy though. Very happy.

I recognize that it seems peculiar for me to actively promote a situation where I receive unpleasant, painful punishment whenever my wife deems it necessary. I’m not alone. There are many couples who have discovered that serious pursuit of a disciplinary relationship, in our case with the wife as disciplinarian, adds to the happiness of a marriage. Lots of theories exist about why this is true. I’ve written about my ideas. I don’t know if they’re correct. What I do know is that what we are doing works.

What we’ve done is to set up a structure inside our marriage that resolves situations that would otherwise create friction and arguments. I’m not talking about spilling food on my shirt or failing to remind my wife of punishment days. I’m talking about those other things couples can get stuck on. You know, squeezing the toothpaste from the middle of the tube. Annoying, inconvenient problems.

It takes no time to convert a minor annoyance into a rule that will make the problem disappear. We are not naïve enough to believe that just by making a rule, my behavior will change. It won’t. But, breaking a rule gets me punished. The punishment serves to teach me and provides Mrs. Lion with the feeling that she has done something to help me change.

Administering punishment is a great pressure release valve. Believe it or not, receiving punishment has the same beneficial effect for me. We don’t let things fester. Mrs. Lion doesn’t need a rule to punish me. If I do something that annoys her, she can punish me for doing that. She might also create an explicit rule if she thinks it will help me improve my behavior. But it’s not necessary.

Think about how you handle situations like squeezing the toothpaste from the middle of the tube. Chances are pretty good you ignore them and they quietly bubble in the background until one day you get disproportionately angry about something else. I think we’ve avoided that trap. In the process, our mutual trust and love have grown. Five years ago I would have never believed that a wooden paddle would be a symbol of our harmony and love.

lion's first chastity deviceI think it was about a week ago Lion wrote that I didn’t unlock him and that was fine since it’s completely up to me when I unlock him. I hadn’t said anything to him about not unlocking him. In the past he’s asked me to give him a heads up. A week ago he was fine with not being told. Last night he asked me to tell him when he’s not getting unlocked. What changed?

Sunday, I did the laundry. Well, I did most of the laundry. Despite getting an early start on it, I forgot to get it out of the dryer. I realized when I went to get dressed for work yesterday. We have a setting that takes wrinkles out. All I had to do was remember to do it. Since the deck has been up, I’ve noticed some wasp nests. The trick is to wait until dusk when they all come back to the nest for the night and spray them then. The trick is also to remember to do it.

I finally remembered to do the laundry after dinner. Lion reminded me about the wasps. I zotted them and went to start the dryer. While I was downstairs, I grabbed some paddles. I owe Lion more and more swats. He spilled food on his shirt at dinner too. At this rate I’ll be swatting him every night forever.

I found a rubber strap. It’s about an inch and a half wide and at least a foot long. Best of all, since it’s rubber, it does a lot of the work for me. With a slight flick of the wrist, the rubber flexes and whack! It’s narrow enough to get right on the sit spot without hitting surrounding areas. And, apparently, it’s a mean sucker. I don’t think Lion was very happy I found it. [Lion — It’s made from conveyor belt material, very thick and heavy (click here to go to where I found it). It hurts like hell! I’m sure this will be a go-to spanker for Mrs. Lion.]

I didn’t particularly have a reason for not playing with him. I don’t need one. My only hint that he was expecting something was when I said my stomach was a little off. It hadn’t been for most of the night. He said he thought maybe something was wrong. Nope. A little later on he asked me to tell him when I planned not to unlock him and, I guess by extension, not play with him. I agreed but I didn’t ask what changed.

I guess the issue is that I don’t actually plan to unlock or not to unlock him on any given night. I mean, there are some nights it’s obvious it ain’t gonna happen. If one of us isn’t feeling well or we’re tired or achy, it’s a pretty good bet we won’t be playing. Sometimes, like last night, I’m doing things and I just need to decompress. But I didn’t really consciously decide not to unlock him. There was never a point that I even thought, “Hmm, I don’t think I’ll unlock him tonight.” If I did, I might have shared it with him. But I might not have. Last week he seemed perfectly fine with my not unlocking him on a few nights. Is that because he wasn’t in the mood anyway? Maybe that’s the answer. It could have been right after his orgasm.

[Lion — I’m fine with not being unlocked. Mrs. Lion certainly doesn’t have to tell me. I sometimes look forward to play and it is nice to learn that none is forthcoming earlier.]

Lioness 3.0 is here! You might think a more vigilant, strict wife would painfully complicate my life. That’s not entirely true. 3.0 has a much easier-to-understand approach to me. For example, wearing a chastity device has been a bit hit or miss since my surgery. There’s been no guiding rule about when I wear it and when I don’t. Earlier in our chastity, a rule would never be necessary. The device stayed on all the time except when Mrs. Lion wanted to play with my penis.

There were times when she would forget to lock me up again before going to sleep. That didn’t happen too often. There was also always the question about how long I should remain out of my cage after a play session. I always took the position that I should go right back in. Mrs. Lion didn’t necessarily agree with that.

Over the last couple of weeks we were repeating that pattern; that is until Friday night. She unlocked me for play on Friday night and when I asked her if she wanted me to get ready for lock up after play was done, she said no you are with me. Without a formal presentation of it, Mrs. Lion established a new chastity rule: When she is with me and able to supervise, I can be wild. When she and I are separated, I wear a chastity device.

Of course she can make exceptions if she wishes, but this rule is very clear-cut and makes sense to both of us. So, Sunday night before bed I asked her if I should put my base ring on, she said yes. I put it on and she locked me into the chastity device.

This may not seem like a big deal to you. After all, it’s logical and doesn’t seem all that different from before. But it is. Until Friday, the chastity device was something I wanted to wear. Mrs. Lion often said that she didn’t mind if I wanted to be wild. Essentially, the device satisfied a kink of mine and her role was to support it. She did an excellent job of that for six years. It was always clear that I wore the device because I wanted to.

I’m not claiming that suddenly Mrs. Lion feels that my chastity device has a new and special place in her heart. I’m sure it’s still not a big deal to her. However, 3.0 apparently decided that since I do wear a device, she could use it to reinforce her role. The way she’s chosen to do it is to keep me locked up whenever she can’t directly supervise me.

It’s a very clever move. It solves a problem for her. Before she instituted this, I asked her when I should or shouldn’t wear the device. She could never give me a good answer. Now she can. She didn’t say that I will always be wild when we are together. She could well leave me locked up even though she’s in the house with me. It may be inconvenient for her to release me and she may have no reason to access my penis.

I imagine that on work nights I will stay locked up unless she wants to tease me. After the teasing and before I go to sleep, she will probably want me back in the cage. I wonder if she’s going to make it my responsibility to remind her to lock me up. She’s notorious for forgetting. I took it on myself Sunday night to remind her.

This could be the basis for a new rule. If I manage to go to sleep on a night before we will be apart (i.e. the night before she goes to work), without being locked in my cage, I get punished. Mrs. Lion can tell me to stay wild, but I have to make sure she’s aware that I’m not wearing a cage and find out if she wants me to get my base ring on. If I end up wild on a day she did not intend, I get punished. What do you think Mrs. Lion?