I was all set to give Lion his orgasm last night. He’d written about needing me to get him excited before doing anything painful to him and I agreed to do it. I guess I got confused because sometimes he tells me he doesn’t just want me yanking on his penis without some foreplay, but if clothespins are the foreplay and I need to get him excited first, but I need foreplay, but I need to get him excited…. Yeah. Confused. Maybe we have it worked out. Do you think so? What do I know? Confused.

Anyway, I’d been trying to get him to the edge, at the very least, for a few nights and it wasn’t working. I was determined that last night would be the night. And then he left the shower door open. Do I go for the orgasm or do I spank him? I didn’t want to do both. It’s better to do a spanking close to the time of the infraction, but his orgasm…. As you can see, I get confused often. Ultimately, I decided his orgasm was more important, given the issues of the previous few nights. Lion was thankful. As a matter of fact, when I told him he was in trouble he muttered something about not wanting to be spanked. Uh, I’m not too fond of the idea either, buddy.

tiny clothespins on penis head

So, off we went on our magical orgasm journey. I brought out mean plastic clothespins. They aren’t as mean as the teeny, tiny clothespins. Those little ones concentrate a lot of pinch in a tiny space. I’m not saying the big ones don’t hurt, they just aren’t as nasty. As I was starting to fondle my weenie, I held his scrotum and made pinching motions on it. He got a little upset and asked if he didn’t just write about not using clothespins before he’s excited. Relax! I wasn’t going to put them on yet. Sheesh! Maybe he’ll get a few extra swats for that outburst. If he was looking for a way to make me stop everything, he came pretty close.

Once he was satisfied I wasn’t putting his nuts in a vise prematurely, we continued on. He’ll tell you he doesn’t like pain, but he certainly got excited by those evil clothespins. Despite his excitement, it still took quite a while to get to the edge. I wasn’t going to take any chances by stopping once we got there. I almost had to throw in the towel because it was very warm in the bedroom, but I soldiered on. I could feel his thighs tightening and I knew we were there. I still didn’t get any Lion cream filling, but he said it was a very nice orgasm.

It may be the late hour. It may be the number of days since his last orgasm. It may be lack of BDSM. For whatever reason, Lion hasn’t been receptive to sex lately. He says he’s been horny. I have no reason to doubt that. He seems to get going, but he runs out of steam before we get to the edge. I’m not giving up. I’m just wondering what to do to help.

I mowed most of the lawn yesterday. It took three tries, but I got all but a tiny portion done. I’d mowed that last time so it’s not bad. I got the longest parts done. Of course, it’s cut long so I’ll need to do it again fairly soon, but that’s a week or more away. I did some other chores and I had enough energy to give Lion attention. I think I might be getting burnt out on the “oh, and the whatsit needs to be changed/cleaned/fixed/watered/etc.” but I will always try to save energy for Lion.

I don’t think he needs a “just because” spanking to help with sex. He may need clothespins or IcyHot or some other form of evilness. I’ll have to let my mind wander and see what I come up with. I’m sure Lion will love to hate whatever it is. It took me a long time to realize that he protests but that doesn’t necessarily mean he doesn’t want me to do it. The problem is that sometimes he really doesn’t. It’s hard to decipher the whininess from the genuine veto. He doesn’t like when I don’t do things because he doesn’t want to do it. I think he should be able to opt-out of playing if he wants to. What good does it do to make him do something he really doesn’t want to do? I mean, there are times I say I don’t want to make dinner, and there are times I really don’t want to make dinner. Lion has no way of knowing which meaning I’m trying to convey.

I don’t know what the answer is to this conundrum. I just don’t want to disappoint Lion.

[Lion — This is a difficult question. The fantasy BDSM answer is that it shouldn’t matter if I want sore balls or not. I don’t get a choice. In the real world, that’s just not something people can live with. The truth is that I suffer from inertia too. Sometimes it feels like too much trouble to have my balls burned with IcyHot or otherwise tormented. That inertia can be overcome fairly easily. Mrs. Lion likes to use CBT as a sort of prelude to serious sexual stimulation–a painful form of foreplay. That works if I am easily aroused. There are times I don’t get hard when she starts torturing me. That isn’t a signal that she shouldn’t do it. I just need help getting my motor running. In the past (when we were in New York), Mrs. Lion would always get me very hard before starting CBT. That’s what happened before we met as well. I don’t remember anyone just starting to do nasty things to my junk. A hard penis was always required first. The best way to make me enthusiastic about the painful play is to get me aroused first. I think we both forgot that somewhere along the line.]

We’ve been watching an old gameshow called “Tattletales”. It pits three celebrity couples against each other. It pits us against each other, too. Well, it doesn’t make us fight. We try to answer the questions. More often than not, we have no idea. For example, one question asked, “Who fell in love first?” How can you possibly know that? Look! It says right here, “Dear diary….” As far as I’m aware, neither of us kept diaries. I know I didn’t. I also know I fell in love with him a while before I admitted it, both to him and to myself. He can’t pinpoint when he fell in love either. I guess we didn’t win any points for that question.

Another question asked if he had changed me after we got married. Well, duh! I never whomped anyone’s butt before his. I was never in a female led relationship. Of course, they didn’t ask if the changes were for the better or not. I don’t know how I’d answer that. Is it good that I can spank him? It is for him. And I suppose it’s a skill. I may never be able to convert that skill into anything salable, but it is a skill. I have been a supervisor before. I liked being paid more but I didn’t have any real power. Even if I’d had real power, I don’t think I would have used it to punish people. Ironically, it’s not something I ever wanted to do.

I did find out something interesting about Lion. We met on lavalife.com. I knew he liked my smile in my profile picture. I did not know I was the only person he contacted. I’d been contacted by a few guys, but couldn’t find a time to meet. Since I met Lion three days after we started talking, I stopped talking to everyone else. I guess lavalife didn’t make much money off of us. Maybe someday we’ll contact them, if they still exist, and let them know how long we’ve been together thanks to their site. I’m very happy I found the site. It’s worked out very well for us.

After the burnt pizza fiasco, Lion lamented the lack of fresh food in the house. I could live off of frozen food forever. Lion needs fresh. Obviously, he can’t drive. I’m the one tasked with shopping. For a few years, I’ve been doing an online order and picking it up on the way home from work or if I happen to be heading in that direction. I’ve also had the order delivered when I know I won’t be going out any time soon. Before my trip east, I discovered that a different store has a cheaper delivery price. Yes, please. Why Lion can’t ask me to do an order is beyond me. Is that like initiating sex? Does he think he’s imposing on my time? I’d prefer that to hearing him complain when there’s no salad stuff or other vegetables.

Anyway, I placed an order for delivery on Sunday. It was due between 1 and 5. This is prime waxing time. I figured no matter when I decided to start, the order would come in the middle. Then I figured it wouldn’t really matter. They drop it off and leave. Normally. This time the guy rang the doorbell. Twice. Shit. Did I forget to check the box that says it’s okay to leave the delivery? No. He just wanted to make sure I knew where the receipt was. Great…except that I was right in the middle of jerking Lion off with oil. That’s the best part of the waxing. Dammit! Talk about anticlimactic.

Lion went to take a shower and I put the groceries away. I noticed he forgot to set up the coffee pot. His leg had been hurting him and my head was hurting on and off. I was going to let him off the hook if he didn’t do it before 5. I was sitting in bed when he came out of the shower and said he had a headache too. I guess it’s a good thing we both felt yucky because he left the shower door open too. If he was going to get a free pass for the coffee pot, he might as well get a free pass for the shower door.

I still have my headache. I think Lion’s went away. I think his leg feels better too. I’ll take some Tylenol later and be back in fighting form for some Lion attention later on.