The other day, Lion said he was so busy. He’s been rewriting and reworking his book. I don’t think he’s wasting his time. I know it’s hard work to write. The problem I had with that statement is that I’m supposed to chase the robot vacuum around trying to figure out why it’s stuck or why it’s not working, and I have to drop everything to deal with the dog. Why isn’t my work time as valuable as his? This is the only problem I have with working from home. I love not having to commute to work. I love not having to deal with most of the drama. I love being home with Lion. It’s so much simpler to grab the packages off the porch when they arrive, rather than worrying about whether they’ll be stolen before I get home from work. I wish I had the flexibility of working whenever I want instead of still being stuck with 8-5, but I can’t argue too much since they let me move my entire office home.

I do get a little stressed out not having that short commute time to wind down on the way home. Sometimes I jump right into dinner or some other chore as soon as I punch out. Lion never understood “me time”. He doesn’t need any. He also never understood why a friend kept asking me to do things outside of work. “Doesn’t she know you’re married?” he’d ask. Yup. She knows. She also knows that married people do things separately sometimes. That’s why they created guys night out and book clubs.

Lion will think I’m saying I’m tired of him. I’m not. I’m not tired of him and I’m not saying I’m tired of him. I’m just musing about the therapeutic properties of driving around aimlessly, before gas cost more than rent. Ironically, he likes to drive around aimlessly when we go camping, but doesn’t understand why I want to do it in my own backyard. He likes to discover new places. Yup. You can around here too.

Anyway, maybe I’m getting spring fever. I hear the birds chirping between bursts of downpours. Perhaps it’s time for a little road trip. I could take the circuitous way home when I come back from the office today.

[Lion — Mrs. Lion almost never goes from working to household chores. She’s on the bed playing with her iPad at 5:01 PM. Usually, she starts dinner at 6 or 6:30. She has to deal with the robot vacuum and the dog because of my limited vision and poor balance. When she went to the office, she did it when she got home. She had a lot less “me” time then, I think. In terms of going out with her girlfriend, I don’t mind too much. It’s just that Mrs. Lion doesn’t want to go out with me. She’s happy to go to lunch or dinner with a friend, but gets unhappy about it if I want to. I guess it cuts into “me” time.]

[Mrs. Lion — I don’t get unhappy when Lion wants to come. He was coming with me to my work function last week and then asked if I’d mind if he didn’t. Now he says he figured I’d just be talking to my coworkers about work. He’s come with me in the past and had a good time. I think. And I have dramatically cut down on iPad time.]

We have been blogging for almost nine years. If you haven’t been with us the entire time, this might be a good chance to catch you up. Mrs. Lion and I have been together for almost 19 years. We were both married before. She has three grown children, and I have two. We are both from New York. I am from New York City, and she is from Upstate; city and country lions. We moved to the Seattle area about 15 years ago when I was offered a good job by a company here.

We have been kinky almost the entire time we’ve known one another. Mrs. Lion started spanking me (play, not discipline) within the first month we dated. Those early spankings were so light I could barely feel them. She started CBT early too. She has a real talent for tying and separating my balls. She also used clothespins quite a bit.

In the late fall of 2013, I discovered cheap Chinese male chastity devices. Years before meeting Mrs. Lion, I reviewed kinky toys and tried quite a few custom male chastity devices. At that time, I was a top and lived with a 24/7 bottom. Wearing a chastity device for more than a few days didn’t fit our lifestyle. Also, those early chastity devices were not very comfortable.

Anyway, I was surfing Amazon and searched for “chastity.” To my surprise, a large number of devices were displayed. They were all inexpensive. I got excited. I ordered three. I didn’t have a plan to be locked up. I just wanted to try them. OK, the idea turned me on.

One of the devices from Amazon seemed to fit comfortably. I went to Mrs.Lion and explained my concept of male chastity to her. She agreed to lock me up. I told her that she had control of any sex I might have. I described the typical male chastity fantasies about being made to wait. She disregarded my narrative. Instead, she decided to make me ejaculate every day. When I expressed surprise at this, she told me she was in charge of when I could ejaculate. If she wanted every day, then I would squirt every day.

I couldn’t argue with her logic. She was in control. My body wasn’t in agreement with this policy. I couldn’t sustain that much jerking off. She relented and went to the more typical orgasm control schedule for me. She agreed to unlock and tease me at least every other day. She decided when I could come.

That first night in December 2013, Mrs. Lion made her first rule for me. It started when she asked me to masturbate while she watched. Her goal was to learn the best way to jerk me off. I did it and told her that I masturbated a couple of times a week. She was genuinely upset. She had no idea I was doing that behind her back. She told me that I could never jerk off again. Never? Yes, never.

Since I was being locked in a male chastity device, any question of jerking off was academic. Mrs. Lion is a laid-back lioness. Consistency has never been one of her strengths. When it came to forbidding me to jerk off, she was a rock. I spent the next three years locked full time. The device only came off to give her access or for cleaning. I didn’t have a chance to jerk off.

I tore my rotator cuff when I fell on a business trip. It required surgery. The device came off for about three months while I recuperated. By that time, I was conditioned not to masturbate. I didn’t even try. Male chastity worked. Chastity device or not, Mrs. Lion owned my sex life. That is true to this day. I haven’t jerked off since that night in 2013.

chastity devices

The male chastity devices I bought on Amazon didn’t fit perfectly. I had problems with pinching and irritation around the base ring. The cages were too long, and peeing became an unpleasant adventure. I discovered, a website that offers an amazing array of male chastity devices (just search for “male chastity”). The prices were much lower than Amazon’s for the same products.

I tried a few more devices from that site. We had the same problems with them. I discovered Mature Metal. This is a two-person company that makes custom male chastity devices. Their Jail Bird model got rave reviews on various web site. Mrs. Lion and I talked about ordering one. It would cost about $400. She wasn’t certain I would want to wear a device long enough to justify the expense. I said that I would. She agreed.

The Jail Bird was very comfortable. The cage was too long. The head of my penis almost never touched the bars at the end. Mature Metal offers adjustments at reasonable prices. Over time we had the cage shortened twice. The current version has a one-inch cage and is a perfect fit.

We also tried other devices. Do a site search (top of the right column) for “reviews” to read about them. Several worked quite well. I wore an Evotion Orion for quite a while. This is a beautifully finished, 3D-printed chastity device. It was the only printed device that wasn’t abrasive on my tender skin. I stopped wearing it because I kept developing a sore under the head of my penis after about a week of wear. I was unable to figure out how to fix it. You’ll find several posts about this device if you search for it.

from love taps to a tomato bottom

Almost from the time I asked Mrs. Lion to lock me up, I also asked her to make and enforce rules. She agreed to try. She is a very creative lioness. She made rules that I was sure to break often. That way, we would get “practice” with spanking. She loves to experiment.

Her plan worked. I ended up being spanked several times a week. She often forgot to punish me when she caught me breaking a rule. So we created “punishment days.” Monday, Thursday, and later Saturday were designated punishment days. I had a rule to remind her on each of those days. That way, she would be less likely to forget to spank me. To this day, I get punished if I don’t remind her every Monday, Thursday, and Saturday.

Over time, she became bolder about paddling me. She stopped feeling bad about hurting me and treated spanking like a job. She doesn’t enjoy spanking me but doesn’t mind doing it. She prides herself on making my bottom red and sore enough to hurt for days afterward.

Once the spankings really hurt, I stopped breaking my rules. It wasn’t intentional. The paddling flipped a switch in my brain that helped me remember to obey. That’s almost true. After a week or two, I would forget a rule and earn a spanking. This recharged my obedience battery for a few weeks.

I forget less and less. That’s good news in terms of domestic discipline but bad news for us. If I’m not spanked regularly, Mrs. Lion starts to forget to spot my infractions, and I get sexually frustrated and less responsive. We tried adding play spankings to fill in when I didn’t earn punishment. That didn’t work very well.

The solution was to add “just because” spankings. If I don’t earn a punishment for a week or two, Mrs. Lion spanks me “just because.” It’s a full ten-minute disciplinary spanking. The rationale is that I must have done something she didn’t spot. The reality is that it recharges my sexual batteries and Mrs. Lion’s hunting instinct. We have a counter on the right column that shows how long it’s been since my last spanking. When the number starts going into double digits, the paddles come out.

Now you are all caught up on our lives. If you want to read more, there are over 5,500 posts on this site that you can read. Have fun!

While I was making dinner, Lion was starting to feel yucky. His tummy was off and his throat was a little sore. Unbeknownst to him, I had my own battles with tummy troubles just before I made dinner. We both soldiered on and felt better after a while. Lion still didn’t feel like playing. I don’t know if he just wasn’t in the mood or the tummy troubles had gotten to him. Neither of us has been sleeping well. I wake up at random times during the night. Last night, the dog decided to bark in my ear at 3 am. I think she wanted to play.

I didn’t pressure Lion into playing. He wants me to take charge in situations like that. I’m not supposed to take no for an answer. I say, if I’m in charge, he can’t tell me not to take no for an answer. Why would I want to make him play when he doesn’t want to play? Sure, I could probably persuade him to get hard and he might enjoy himself after all, but does that make any sense? I’d much rather wait until he’s more receptive. He may not know if he can get hard on a given night, but if he starts out not even wanting to try, it’s an uphill battle.

I don’t see anything wrong with snuggling. Maybe, after a while of close contact, he might change his mind. That’s allowed. He could tell me and we’ll give it a try. No pressure. If it doesn’t work anyway, at least we had fun trying. As long as it feels good, it wasn’t a waste of time. Obviously, I’m not talking about spanking or any of the other painful things I could do to him. This is purely a weenie rubbing and/or sucking matter. It should feel good or there’s no point.

What’s going to happen tonight? I don’t know. We’ll have to see how it goes. I’m sure Lion thought everything was a go last night until he started feeling yucky. We’ll plan for the best and keep in mind that it doesn’t always go according to plan. That’s life.

I have to give my lioness a lot of credit. She works very hard to make sure I have a sex life. The job is getting more difficult. I don’t understand why, but I’m not responding very well. She isn’t doing anything wrong. It’s me. Maybe I’m in a slump. Perhaps my intense work writing is affecting my sex drive. I don’t know. I like that Mrs. Lion locked me into the cock ring last night. I’m interested in trying a new use for the spanking bench.

We should make a few changes here. Unfortunately, Mrs. Lion has to bear the brunt of the work it will take to get them done. I agree that we need to use other rooms. There is a lot of clutter scattered around the house. Most of that has to go before we can spread out. That will take a lot of work. Maybe we need to make a trip to the dump with stuff we don’t need anymore.

the sore buns report

Ironically, my bottom hurts when I sit on the bed, but not when I’m in my desk chair. The best explanation for this is that my bruises are more to the sides of my bottom. They don’t end up contacting a normal chair. The bed is soft, and pressure is applied further up the sides. I don’t remember this happening before.

When I’m spanked, I usually end up with what some people call a tomato butt. There are a couple of large, darker red areas. Those areas are leathery to the touch and sometimes bleed a little. This has less to do with Mrs. Lion’s spanking style than my particular anatomy. Some bottoms turn pink and then dark red. There is little-to-no tomato effect. Others, like me, rarely get very red but almost always get the dark, leathery patches. I don’t think that equates to how much the spanking hurts. Mine hurt a lot. Mrs. Lion makes them hurt from beginning to end.

On Monday night, I said that she was Lioness 5.0 based on her spankings. She said that she was 1.5 because she feels that she has backtracked in other areas. I understand what she means. It’s not just her. We both allowed ourselves to drift away from our sexual path. Inertia is threatening us.

It’s not fair to blame her. I’m probably more to blame. My excitement level is low. She isn’t inspired to do more. I don’t know what to do about this. Neither of us is ready to give up.