Lion has decided that “I like when he’s horny” translates into his not getting an orgasm until he is at his plateau and presumably isn’t very interested. I’m not sure where he got that idea from. Why would I want to give him an orgasm if he isn’t very interested? I’ve done it before, yes, but I think my point is that I want him so frustrated that he can almost spontaneously orgasm. If I wait too long we’ve both lost out. He no longer cares and I don’t get that incredibly hard cock straining to have its moment of glory. I’m not sure how to describe it, but when Lion is really, really ready, he gets so hard his penis gets that nice curve to it and the head is very pronounced and the skin is stretched tight. It’s beautiful, if you can call a penis beautiful.

So that’s my goal. Maybe from now on, even when we get to a scheduled date, if he’s not horny enough he won’t get his orgasm. He has to prove to me that he wants it. He doesn’t have to do it all by himself, of course. I’ll be giving him a helping hand or mouth, along with clothes pins, paddles, Velcro, and other assorted things. But he has to show me that beautiful penis if he wants an orgasm. And I know I’ll cheat. I give him bonus orgasms all the time. I’m a horrible top, except that when I want to give him an orgasm just because, as a top, I’m well within my rights. But there will be times, like now, when I want to see that beautiful penis and know that he is oh-so-close and so damn frustrated he would hump a tree if he could.

Lion is now a few days past his scheduled orgasm and we’re still working on getting him horny enough. He may be very frustrated right now, but I know he’s loving every minute of it. Well, maybe not every minute. [Lion – Most minutes]

It’s no secret that I like to give Lion orgasms. Our brand of chastity is not really orgasm denial so much as orgasm granting. On occasion I do make him wait. And for the most part, I can’t point to any reason I give him one. I just feel like doing it. Lion doesn’t usually mind an extra one now and then. Last night was no different.

I started off with the intent of just edging him. He did nothing to change my mind. He didn’t beg. He didn’t tell me he was incredibly horny. He just took his clothes pins like a champ and expected to be edged and locked away again. It wasn’t really until he was close the last time that I decided to keep going. I did get a little bit of Lion cream, but that’s not why I let him come. I don’t have a real reason. I just did it.

I’m sure some of you are thinking I give in to Lion too often. Maybe I do. But, again, he didn’t sway me. Afterwards, he told me he was wondering how he was going to make it until December 1. He never said a word about it. I guess he thought it would influence me. It might have. But then again, it might have influenced me to make him wait. I think it depends on what kind of a mood I’m in. Do I want to be a bitch or not? Do I want to tell him, “oh, so sorry”? Do I want to see the smile on his face after he calms down? I could have gone either way last night. There’s no real reason why I was nice.

In some respects, I don’t think Lion really wants to be denied. I think he just wants me to be the one who decides whether or not he has an orgasm. If I gave him one every week, he’d be fine with that. If I gave him one every two weeks, he’d be less fine with it but he would deal with it. As long as I’m making the decision.

Yesterday I wrote that, because of a snafu regarding the schedule, Lion was due for three four-day waits in a row. I wasn’t sure if I would give him his orgasm last night. That’s not technically true. I was pretty sure I was going to give him one. He was too. And why not?

If I take it down to the basic form, all Lion cares about is that I’m in charge. As long as I do what I want and not (necessarily) what he wants, he’ll be happy. There are some nights he’s not so ready for an orgasm. Too bad. Is it a scheduled night? If so, then he’ll have that orgasm whether he wants to or not. Now there are some exceptions. Is he not into it because he’s tired or not feeling well or he got bad news? I won’t force him to have an orgasm. But if it’s just an average Tuesday night and he’s just not as horny as he could be but I still have enough to work with, he’s having the orgasm. There are some nights he’s very ready for an orgasm. Too bad. If it’s not a scheduled night, he’s out of luck. Unless, of course, I feel like it. He can always hope for a bonus night.

In four days, Lion will have yet another orgasm. Then he’s in for a longer wait. I think he only has two orgasms scheduled for November. The poor boy. Fairly long waits for a Lion used to having a ten day wait on average. I know, he’s a lightweight when compared to some males in chastity. Our little game is less about the wait and more about the teasing. I don’t think I ever looked at is as an exercise in making him wait. Pre-chastity he waited a few weeks at a time before he’d take matters into his own hands. It’s not the wait that bothers him so much. It’s the constant reminder that he can’t take matters into his own hands. It’s the constant reminder that I can torture him and lock him back up. It’s the constant desire that I will go just a tiny bit too far edging him and he’ll get to the promised land.

Four days, four weeks, four months. It doesn’t matter. And if it doesn’t matter, I’d rather stick to shorter waits. Not necessarily four days, but not four months. I think Lion agrees. And if he doesn’t? Too bad.

Male orgasm control is largely exercised by depriving the male of wanted orgasms. His keyholder or top only allows him to come when she wishes. Most of us who are under orgasm control, aside from waiting, are teased to the edge of orgasm. Sometime we get a ruined orgasm which is carrying edging just past the point of no return. Both practices are virtually the same thing. I decided to do some research on male arousal and orgasm to get a better handle on these orgasm control practices. Males and females have very different arousal patterns. Females slowly build excitement that climaxes with at least one orgasm. The buildup is steady. Males, on the other hand, have a very different pattern. We start to get aroused and become erect. Continued stimulation feels good but doesn’t necessarily build up excitement very much. Finally, we get very excited and ejaculate. The time it takes to go from hard to ejaculation is generally less than ten seconds. Once we ejaculate, we lose interest. That takes a minute or two at most.

When we are at the top of the curve, the brain initiates a sequence of events. Starting ejaculation takes about two seconds. In that time various glands begin releasing components of semen and they start mixing and moving toward the penis. Muscle spasms are triggered the next few seconds that moves the semen up and out. The ejaculatory phase can take from one to ten seconds or more. In some men like me, the initial ejaculation is followed with semen dripping out for some time. Occasionally, it looks like I am not producing any semen. I have an orgasm with no apparent ejaculate. However, as I calm down, semen starts dripping out. It’s probably a natural part of getting older.

Edging is fairly tricky. The idea is to get the male as far up that steep curve as possible without triggering ejaculation. When Mrs. Lion edges me, I feel a rapid buildup of excitement. I mentally prepare to ejaculate. I can’t help but thrust and try to get over the top. Of course, Mrs. Lion knows that and stops just before I can get that satisfaction. My arousal level will gradually go down. When it does, she starts stimulating me again right to the point I will come. And she stops. That’s the process. Grrrr! In order to do this, she needs to read me like a book. I think that I do some involuntary things just prior to orgasm. Even when I fight to remain perfectly still and breathing evenly, she can tell. As far as I can see, edging gives me all the work of sex without that final note. Each successive time she repeats it, the frustration grows. I never want to tell her to stop. Maybe this time she will take me over the top. When she finally stops, I gradually lose my erection. Oddly, I never feel compelled to finish on my own. I guess I am getting well trained. The more times you edge in  a session, the shorter the time becomes between almost ejaculating and the start of orgasm.

A ruined orgasm is edging that goes a bit too far. Just one stroke past the point of no return will trigger the brain to start the launch process. When stimulation suddenly stops, everything shuts down. I do feel muscles tensing and I can feel the PC muscles trying to ejaculate. Generally some semen will seep out. Depending on just how soon she stops stroking, the ruined orgasm can be almost as good as a full one. It’s very tricky to stop at exactly the right time. A few seconds after the ruined orgasm, I rapidly get soft. We haven’t really tried it, but I’ve been told that if Mrs. Lion keeps stimulating my penis, eventually I will get hard again and ready for more edging or another ruined orgasm.

There is a risk with ruined orgasms. Contrary to claims to the opposite, any ejaculation will have an effect on the cumulative frustration the male feels. I’ve heard tales it makes a guy hornier. In my case it doesn’t. The next day I either feel the same way I do after a full orgasm or no different than if I were edged the night before. Some keyholders provide only ruined orgasms as release after long waits. They never give their male the opportunity for a full one. They guys who live this way seem pretty happy with the situation. When I think about it, I realize that women are often in sexual situations that don’t result in an orgasm for them. Either their partners finish too soon or they have some other issue that keeps them from coming. However, they report still enjoying sex a lot. Of course the female orgasm builds in a linear manner, so a lot of arousal is fun too. Males can experience the same thing when edged. I, for example, know I’m not getting to really come, but I am getting a lot of the pleasure anyway. It’s both frustrating and enjoyable. It’s enough fun for me to want more. I think that is why many guys are content with just edging and ruined orgasms. They are fun and are certainly better than nothing. I’m grateful that Mrs. Lion teases me almost every night. Nevertheless I am counting the days until I can come again.