I am glad Lion likes super edging. I like it when he’s super horny so I guess it all works out well. The only problem is that, once he’s near the edge, it’s easy to go too far. As he said, neither of us likes ruined orgasms. Obviously, they aren’t as much fun for him as a full orgasm. There is a solution, of sorts. I can salvage the orgasm. That makes it a little more fun for Lion, but still leaves me feeling like I screwed up.

The chance of a ruined orgasm could stop me from getting him too close to the edge. It’s a fine line. I need to push my luck just enough that he thinks he might just go over without actually letting him go over. It would be helpful if he had a gauge attached somewhere that showed how close he was. I thought he had a ruined one last night. I tasted some precum, kept going and then he was panting and tensing up. He never got soft so I decided to edge him again. I’m happy to report that it wasn’t a ruined orgasm and I left Lion more frustrated than ever.

He had reported being a little horny before I edged him. I haven’t gotten the Lion weather report in a long time. He does mention how horny he is from time to time, but he used to tell me the weather was steamy or tropical. Given the fact that he thought he was only a little horny last night, I don’t know if I can trust his self-reporting. I do trust his panting and gasping for air when I’m through with him. I also note how long it takes for him to recover enough to get back on his side of the bed to watch TV. I guess it’s a gauge of how well I’ve done.

I’m not sure if he’ll get his orgasm this weekend or not. I may have to play with my food a bit longer to make sure he’s really ready for it. I doubt he’ll ever beg for an orgasm. He doesn’t want to be able to tell me when to give him one. I understand that, but sometimes I think it would be nice to know when he’s at this limit and really wants one. It doesn’t necessarily mean I’ll give him one, but it would be nice to know.

[Lion comments — I could start my weather reports again. I’m not sure I’ve been at the point where I just have to come. I suppose the time for me to beg for release is just after I have been edged and before Mrs. Lion begins again. She could ask me if I want to come. My problem is that in the past when she asked me if I answered that I did, she gave me an orgasm. The fun ended. I think that if she wants me to truly reach a limit, she will have to not let me come even if I say I want to. If this happens over and over, eventually she will see if I change in my response. As long as she gets me off if I say yes, I am not going to say it.]

We didn’t play Spankardy last night. Lion had been snoozing during Wheel of Fortune and I told him I could give him a play spanking any time he liked. We didn’t even wind up doing a spanking. It wasn’t necessary. After I’d gotten him a little excited I moved down to lick him and then asked if he wanted some real oral action. That’s always a silly question.

I wasn’t sure if he’d get to the edge or not, but I figured it was worth a try. I’ve missed sucking him. He’s missed it too. He was hard almost immediately. I got him pretty close if not to the edge. I could feel the sore spot as I sucked him. I guess it’s a scar now. Lion says it doesn’t hurt which is good. I would have sucked him longer but my sinuses felt like they were trying to drown me. As it was, I thought it was a very good first try in a long time. And now we know he will get excited even if he doesn’t think he’s in the mood.

Tonight, I’ll make sure I can suck him longer. Maybe we’ll even give a play spanking a go. Barring that, maybe I’ll bring out the rope or clothespins. I have many toys at my disposal to help get him super excited. It sounds like we can get back on track again. Lion will be frustrated in no time. Then it’s just a matter of keeping him frustrated until I decide it’s time for his orgasm. Now the question is whether I should start the clock from last night or back when he had his orgasm. This is absolutely an instance when he didn’t care about waiting for the first week or so. Since he hasn’t suffered yet, does it really count?

I guess I can answer right away. It absolutely doesn’t matter how long he’s been frustrated or even how long he’s been waiting. I just have to make sure he waits long enough and I get to determine that. If I say he’s waited long enough, I can give him an orgasm tonight. Spoiler alert: he hasn’t waited long enough. I will say that, when I decided he should have a short wait thrown in, I hadn’t foreseen his not caring about any sexual contact at all. With that monkey wrench thrown in, I don’t see how it could possibly be a short wait. It will take time to build him up to the level of frustration I require. Nope. He’s in for the long haul again. It may not be 20 days, but it won’t be 4 either. [Lion comments — Today is day 9, FYI in case you wanted to know.]

Buried deep in any relationship, kinky or not, there always seems to be that little nagging fear about “doing it right”. Mrs. Lion worries about whether she’s making me wait between orgasms too little or too much. After seven years of doing this, you’d think that there would be no more questions about “just right”. Of course, there are.

I don’t react to things the same way year in and year out. I don’t think I’m even that stable across much shorter time spans. When dealing with something as ephemeral as ejaculation, it isn’t possible to set some sexual oven timer to just the right setting to make a perfect orgasm. Sex isn’t like baking. What makes things difficult for Mrs. Lion is that she, not I, decides when I’m ready. Thinking back to all the years that I got to decide, I can’t claim to have set my own timer very well either.

In one sense, sexual timing is opportunistic. Before male chastity, I got to have sex when it was available. True, I could always jerk off if nothing else seemed available. Even doing that carried some risks. What would happen if I masturbated today and tomorrow a great opportunity for a blow job came up. I might or might not be optimally ready to enjoy it. Worse yet, what if I played with myself in the afternoon and then that evening my partner wanted sex. I might not even be able to perform. I actually worried about things like this. As a result, when Mrs. Lion was very infrequently offering sex, I would put off masturbating as long as I could on the off chance tonight might be the night for the real deal. As it turned out, I rarely had a conflict.

Fast-forward to our current situation. I can’t masturbate and I have no choice but to wait for Mrs. Lion to decide to get me off. Because she isn’t interested in sex for herself, she has no biological clock to help her decide when I should ejaculate. Since we practice male chastity, even if she had that clock, it wouldn’t drive her decision to get me off. Or would it?

Every couple has their own particular male chastity style. Some enjoy excruciatingly long waits between orgasms. Others, have fun with keeping the male as horny as possible for more limited amounts of time. We fall into the second category. I think Mrs. Lion would be happy if she could discover some method she could use to decide when it was time for me to ejaculate. Over the years, the amount of time between my orgasms has increased. Part of the reason for this is that I’ve gotten older and a little sicker. This seems to have made it more comfortable for me to wait longer.

A bigger reason, I think, is that I’ve learned to appreciate being teased. I’ve learned to truly enjoy being edged. I haven’t learned to like it enough to forgo orgasms entirely, but I have acquired a real taste for it. This will not come as a surprise to Mrs. Lion. That still leaves the big question open. How long should I wait?

Under the rules of male chastity, I’m not supposed to decide how long. Even if it was up to me, I’m not sure I would have any better luck coming up with a schedule than my lioness. As she mentioned in her post yesterday, we did talk about not starting the clock until she was able to bring me right to the edge of orgasm. The reasoning is that until we get to that point, I’m not particularly motivated to ejaculate. Our recent experience indicates that this initial non-edging period can run anywhere from a few days to a couple of weeks.

It’s pretty easy for both of us to know when I’m in this zone. I am very happy to simply enjoy the sexual stimulation without any hope of orgasm during this time. Ejaculating only becomes important to me when Mrs. Lion can push me right to the edge. Then I really want to come. It makes sense that this is when her “orgasm clock” should start. We’re still begging the question. Once it starts, how long should it run?

So far, Mrs. Lion is ready to give in and let me have an orgasm before I am. Maybe it is a kind of sexual game of chicken. Perhaps the fun in it can be seeing who gives in first. Obviously, I can’t demand an orgasm when I’ve had enough. I think Mrs. Lion can tell when she’s pushed me to the point that I’m almost willing to do anything if she’ll just finish me off. I think this is where it becomes fun. So far, she’s never kept me at that point very long. I think the longest she’s made me wait after I get this desperate has been three days. What would it be like if she made me wait a week? Or two?

Would it stop being fun for me after a while? Would it become more fun for her when I reach that point of desperation? Would I ever get to that point? We don’t know the answer. We don’t even know how much fun it would be for her or for me if we try. Perhaps we should try to find out.

Despite the fact that I’m working, I’m having trouble keeping track of what day it is. I keep thinking it’s Thursday. For days I’ve thought it was Thursday. I have no idea what’s special about that day that makes me want to hurry it along, but it still isn’t Thursday. I can’t imagine how Lion keeps the days straight. I do know that the longer his furlough drags on, the more he worries about his job and how we’ll pay for things. I also think he’s upset about his birthday. There’s nothing like a birthday to stir up feelings of mortality.

Between having an orgasm Sunday night and worrying about things, he didn’t want to do anything last night. I’m not sure what I can do to help except be there for him. Telling him to snap out of it is ridiculous. When you’re in a funk, there’s no snapping out of it. Ironically, I do tend to snap out of it eventually. By that, I mean I don’t gradually feel better. It seems to happen suddenly. When I had my recent whatever-the-hell-it-was, I felt rotten all day, up to and including the time I left work. I ran an errand on the way home and by the time I walked in the door I was fine. But that’s me. And I’m weird. All I can do for Lion is to keep things as even-keeled as possible and help him through.

Several months ago, I suggested that Lion’s wait time shouldn’t officially start until he was horny again. Since he’s not ready for action the day after an orgasm, should that really count? At times, he doesn’t feel horny for a few days. When I suggested not counting those days, Lion said they should count. Recently, however, he seems to be saying they shouldn’t count.

The problem, of course, is that it’s difficult to know when the clock should start. Does it start when I can edge him? Does it start when he feels horny? We haven’t been able to answer those questions. I guess that means we’re stuck with our current method. Not that there’s anything wrong with it. As long as we both realize it might not be the most accurate system in the world, we should be fine. When Lion sighs and says he’s waited X days, he needs to understand that the real number is actually less. I think that’s made it easier for me to make him wait. It may have been 21 days since his last orgasm, but he didn’t really start feeling it until the fourth day, so it’s really a seventeen-day wait. It’s funny how the mind can justify things.