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In: Punishment, Spanking

Nowadays, there seems to be only one offense that gets me a spanking: forgetting to set up the coffee pot. That’s what I did on Thursday. When Mrs. Lion served breakfast on Friday morning, she informed me that breakfast was a lot of trouble. I noticed that she brought in a box of doughnuts. I wondered why that was a lot of trouble. She didn’t keep me waiting for the answer. She told me that she had to set up the coffee pot.

That’s all she said. She rarely tells me what that means. I suppose it isn’t necessary. In her communication style, if she mentions an offense, she assumes I understand that I will get a visit from one of her paddles. She prefers to wait until after dinner to spank me. She carries in my spanking pillow. It is a very firm foam wedge that elevates my hips. That helps tighten the skin on my ass. Slightly stretched skin both hurts more and helps prevent bleeding.

Mrs. Lion doesn’t talk much when it comes to punishing me. She will bring in the foam spanking pillow. She will have put a paddle on the bed. If I don’t notice the activity, she will tell me it is time. I get in position, and she begins. There is nothing erotic about it. I no longer get hard before I am spanked.

It’s a little odd. Mrs. Lion punishes me because I want/need to feel her control. I do get turned on when I think about being punished., but not when I am about to get spanked. One of the reasons it isn’t easy to convince a partner to discipline her partner is the mental leap required to understand why a guy would ask for it.

It’s one thing to request spanking as foreplay. Most of the so-called domestic discipline blogs are really about erotic spankings under the guise of discipline. I list one or two of them in our “Blogs we like” section. These arrangements feature DD contracts when they are usually no more than erotic punishment wish lists. They read like spanking fantasies.

There’s nothing wrong with this. It’s not domestic discipline. As I see it, domestic discipline is straightforward to describe. Mrs. Lion can make any rule she wishes and will spank me if I break it. She can spank me for annoying her or otherwise acting poorly. I don’t get a vote. I also don’t get to specify the nature or severity of my punishments. All I do is consent to Mrs. Lion’s authority and right to punish me as she sees fit. That’s it.

We both know that submitting this way adds erotic fuel to my sexual fire. That’s a big reason I asked Mrs. Lion to take charge. That doesn’t diminish the value of her discipline in any way. It’s a kind of hormonal nudge that assures I will docilely get into position and accept a very painful spanking.

There’s an embarrassing irony in this. My sexual attachment to spanking is Mrs. Lion’s partner as a disciplinary wife. It assures me that I will willingly accept something I hate when she punishes me. It doesn’t just apply to spanking—any form of punishment she chooses to inflict works the same way. Even though I know how unpleasant it will be, I willingly accept it.

I’m not alone. If you do a little reading between the lines on some of the blogs devoted to male discipline for real offenses like The Disciplinary Couples Club, you will find that even though the men are severely disciplined for real offenses, there is that erotic undertone that assures their compliance. I guess it’s the way we are wired. I’m very grateful that Mrs. Lion understands and has become an excellent disciplinary wife.

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In: Mrs Lion Comments

Last night I noticed that Lion hadn’t set up the coffee pot. Over the past few weeks, he’s asked me if the coffee pot is set up. I have no good way of answering him. If I say no, then he can set it up to avoid punishment. If I say yes, then if I refuse to answer in the future, he’ll know it hasn’t been set up. The last time he asked, I answered by saying it’s not my job to tell him. I even set up the camera and pointed it toward the coffee pot. He still hasn’t reconfigured it yet. What can I do? I tried to save his buns. I can’t help it if he doesn’t cooperate.

This issue that I have with this morning’s transgression is that Lion turned it back on me. He said he went in to put it together, but I hadn’t cleaned it out by that time. So it’s my fault he didn’t put the coffee pot together? Hmmm…if only there were some way he could clean the coffee pot so he could put it together. Hmmm…I wonder how he could do that? Let’s think about this for a while… Oh! I know. He could clean out the coffee pot and put it together. Sometimes I don’t get the tray into the kitchen, so it’s not an oh-so-easy job to rinse out the components and put them back together. But I’m fairly sure the tray was in the kitchen early. And, it’s not like Lion wasn’t in the kitchen a few more times before going to bed. And, to be fair, even if the tray was in the kitchen, we’ve never discussed his cleaning the coffee pot as a workaround. To me, it’s just common sense. If I need X done before I can do Y and I can physically do X, then shouldn’t I do X so I can complete Y? (To be even fairer, I don’t always exercise common sense. And Lion’s version of common sense may differ from my own.) [Lion — Mrs. Lion has a good point. If the tray with the dirty coffee pot was in the kitchen, I didn’t see it. I will look for it from now on.]

The other issue I noted this morning deals with a phone call that needed to be made. I’m working. Yes, I should be working right now, and I’m “goofing off” writing a post. Anyway, Lion is writing. I asked if he could make the phone call or if he needed me to do it (since I’m working). He asked if I could do it…because then I could coordinate a time that works best for me…and he’s writing. A) the time that works for me is after I’m done with work, 12:30 on Fridays. B) I’m working. So I left a message, and because for some reason, these repair people don’t understand how to use the phone number you leave for a return call, I got a message back on my cellphone that anytime is fine to pick it up. And I’m left wondering why this got turned back on me.

I guess the phone call being put on my plate only annoyed me because of his turning the coffee pot not getting set up back on me. I’m not sure why that annoyed me initially. Actually, I wouldn’t go so far as to say the coffee pot really annoyed me. Let’s say it ruffled my feathers. And maybe the phone call wouldn’t have bothered me so much if he hadn’t added “and I’m writing” to the mix. It’s like writing is more important than my work. I understand the train of thought and you want to get things down before you forget them. The same is true of the ridiculous ledger I’m looking at with negative numbers here and positive numbers there and what-the-hell-does-this-mean over there. Losing my place makes it so much harder to get it done.

Nope. None of this has anything to do with sex, male chastity, orgasm denial, erections, etc. But Lion will get punished for the coffee pot. And maybe I’ll figure out how to keep my feathers unruffled.

[Lion — Wow. I didn’t realize I annoyed Mrs. Lion. When she asked me if she or I should call the trailer repair place, I assumed she was OK doing it. I was in middle of writing a steamy sex scene and didn’t want to lose the flow. Of course, if Mrs. Lion just asked me to call, I would have done it. If I’m given a choice, I expect it’s OK to make the one that works best for me. Mrs. Lion didn’t write whether she is punishing me twice for the two things that I did.]

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In: Lion's Journal, Blogging

A fellow blogger I’m happy to call a friend has a passion for analytics. She wrote an amazing post detailing how her blog, strictjuliespanks.blogspot.com, rates in terms of what readers like most. The analysis is detailed, and I found it fascinating. Her blog is on the Google, Blogger platform. It supplies excellent analytical information to the bloggers that use it. Our blog is independent. I use the Amazon AWS cloud for Male Chastity Journal. It doesn’t supply visitor data. The actual service that delivers this page to you is called Cloudfront. It’s a network of thousands of servers around the world that cache our pages. Services like Hulu use this same service. As a result, some of the more traditional sources of analytic data don’t work. We subscribe to one that uses some javascript in our page code to capture statistics.

I bring all this up because I was inspired to use our analytic tool to try to understand what our readers find most useful. According to the number of page views we get, the most popular topics are introducing a partner to male chastity and how to get your partner to spank you. No big surprise there. However, there’s more to the story than that. Half of our visitors come from search engines. I did a little more digging and discovered that the most popular search terms were essentially the same as the topics of our most popular pages.

If we were selling stuff, it would make sense to provide richer content along those lines. I am reading the stats differently. Half of our readers navigate directly to the blog. They don’t click links on other sites, including search engines. These readers are almost certainly not interested in endless posts about getting started. My main takeaway is that we need to keep writing about our lives and pay some attention to those popular searches.

book learning

My book, Fan Mail, got its first review on Amazon. It was very kind and informative. The reviewer made an interesting point I didn’t consider when I wrote the book:

“ Might even serve as a good way to introduce a little bit of kink to your own relationship, planting some seeds as it were.“

It’s true that the heroine is sexually dominant most of the time. She also spanks her boyfriend. Their behavior seemed natural to me. Maybe I’m so kinky that I don’t know how to write about vanilla sex. Well, maybe I’m not that far gone, but I truly believe that it’s better to be direct with sexual needs rather than trying to manipulate your partner into giving you what you want.

Almost 90 percent of US adults, both men, and women, have spanking fantasies. It feels right to bring them out in fiction. I may have made a big mistake. So far there is only one review. If you’ve read the book, please review it on amazon.com. If you haven’t read the book, please do. The kindle version is only $2.99 USD.

By:
In: Edging, Erections, Mrs Lion Comments, Orgasm

While it’s usually Lion looking forward to an orgasm, I find myself looking forward to one, his, of course. I edged him once last night and I was going for another but he petered out. Damn! I need to get him horny enough for an orgasm.

No, he hasn’t had a long wait. It’s only been fourteen days. It isn’t even a long wait over the past few months. However, I was going to try for three orgasms this month, for no other reason than because I wanted to. Lion’s average last year seemed a bit lacking so I was going to up my game. I can’t do that if Lion isn’t cooperating.

In his defense, his shoulder has been hurting and we went to Costco yesterday so his legs were sore. Since he doesn’t leave the house very often, he’s not so used to walking. I was thinking of that last night and I realized that he never understood why walking through Costco would make me so achy and tired I couldn’t play with him. I guess that’s the problem with not understanding other people’s health conditions. Some people will tell depressed people to snap out of it as if they can really control their depression that easily. Hey, snap out of your breast cancer! Nope. That doesn’t work either.

All I can do is keep playing with Lion and hope that eventually he’ll be horny enough for an orgasm. Maybe that’ not entirely true. He may very well be horny enough for an orgasm already. It’s his body that may not be playing along. After all, the other night he was horny but his shoulder was hurting. We’ve got to get the planets aligned for an orgasm. Maybe he needs a nice play spanking to get the juices flowing.

I’ll keep working on him. We’ll get there.