As I’ve written, Mrs. Lion lost interest in sex for herself some time ago. It’s been almost five years since I’ve had vaginal intercourse. I’m lucky that my lioness is willing to provide oral and manual release for me. I don’t masturbate, so I am dependent on her for release.

For the last nine years, we’ve been practicing male chastity. I was locked full-time in a male chastity device for the first several years. That’s what trained me not to masturbate. I lost interest in it, and now, even wild (no male chastity device), there is no danger that I will jerk off. Since she isn’t driven by her need for sex, my orgasms are arbitrarily spaced out by her and my slowing sexual clock.

Many of our readers are aroused when they think about orgasm control. I certainly was when we started male chastity. The idea is still exciting to me when I think about it. Most of the time, it doesn’t cross my mind. It’s just the natural course of things for me. That may be hard to understand if you are new to male chastity, but after all these years, it’s all I know.

I do think about fucking. I love how it feels to have two-person sex. I’m not fixated on it. Just as I’ve accepted orgasm control, I’ve learned to feel good about my limited sexual menu. Every so often, a sex toy company will contact me to test their stuff. I’ve tried a variety of male masturbators. So far, none get me very aroused, much less get me off. In case you’re wondering, I would never go all the way with one of those toys unless Mrs. Lion allowed it. That hasn’t been an issue.

There seems to be something new in the world of male masturbators. Many of them seem to include suction. They have vacuum pumps that cause the silicone sleeves to grab the penis. Suction was one feature of the old Venus 2000. That device is the only one so far that could reliably get me off. I’m not counting the Magic Wand vibrator since that requires an operator. Mrs. Lion sometimes uses it to make me come.

The addition of suction makes these new devices function as a penis pump. Penis pumps are sleeves that go over the penis. Then, a pump is used to remove some of the air in the sleeve. The resulting lower air pressure makes it easier for blood to flow to the penis. It can help produce an erection. It can also temporarily enlarge the penis. This vacuum effect is what interests me about these new devices. Perhaps I’ll review one.

Based on my mail over the years, there are a lot of guys whose wives lost interest in sex. Some even grew to dislike penises. That puts the male half of the couple into a bit of a bind. Some guys try male chastity as a game to get their wives to show some interest in sex. It’s a difficult situation. I’m very lucky because Mrs. Lion is happy to get me off.

I’m not sure what would happen if she refused any form of sex. I would be very unhappy. It’s good that she is so loving and hasn’t lost her taste for penis.

I may be heading for a spanking. We are coming on two weeks of good behavior. This puts my bottom into “just because” spanking territory. Once we go more than ten days, Mrs. Lion starts to lose her edge spotting behavioral issues. “Just because” spankings are as much for her as for me. Of course, I’m the one who will have trouble sitting for a day or two.

It’s probably no shock that I read other blogs about spanking and orgasm control. I’ve noticed that other bloggers I read are writing much less frequently. I’ve heard that some are getting less traffic than they have in the recent past. Our traffic is steady, but not growing. I would suggest that more frequent writing would help. I don’t think that male chastity and domestic discipline are particularly good TikToK or Instagram topics., but what do I know.

Let’s face it; one male rear end is pretty much the same as another when it is bent over for a spanking. All penises don’t look alike, but they aren’t so different that you could identify a guy by a picture of his cock. The same is true of female parts. Pictures of my butt or penis are only interesting because of what’s been done to them., not their inherent good looks.

A big issue for sex bloggers like us is that we evolve, and the subject matter we discuss changes subtly. For example, at the beginning (2014), I wrote a lot about male chastity devices. I had a lot to say about fitting and living in one. It was new to me. Over time, I grew used to wearing my male chastity device, and it became less interesting to write about. We both accepted male orgasm control as a fact of life. It wasn’t special for me to be horny and wishing to come. Edging was my most common sexual activity.

As a result, my writing moved away from chastity devices and into the more internal realization that the devices trained me not to masturbate. It wasn’t remarkable that I had to wait for a release. I’ve had to wait for the last nine years. It’s no big deal. That’s the problem. If you are new to male chastity and are going through the same things I did in 2014, reading my 2022 adventures isn’t very useful or interesting. The blog evolved away from its initial audience.

Our traffic stays high because we have static pages about the basics of male chastity, spanking, and domestic discipline. Google points interested readers to those articles, or they discover them independently by looking at the menu. A small number of people do a blog search for topics of interest.

I think that one reason bloggers I follow are writing less often is that they feel that they have said all that needs to be said on the subjects of their blogs. Mrs. Lion and I sometimes feel that way too. We are approaching our 6,000th post. There isn’t much to say about our kinks that we haven’t covered. Our approach is to report our current state of affairs. This is probably not interesting to a beginner but may be helpful to people further along in these kinks.

We started writing about how we got into male chastity and spanking. Then, we wrote about integrating it into our lives and marriage. Now, we talk about how we keep our interests alive and refine our understanding. I could have gone in another direction. I could have written about my current fantasies, no matter how impractical to implement. I think that would be hot reading, but it feels wrong to write about it here. I restrict my fantasy reporting to activities within the realm of possibility. Mrs. Lion usually tries any I propose. When she tries them, we both report on how we are doing.

Our blog was always meant to be a sexual journal. It’s our story. We write it for each other as much as we write it for you. I realize that most of our readers don’t follow the blog. They seek specific information. That’s fine. Most of our regular blog readers found us after searching for something of interest. I’m happy you are reading what we write.

I have asked myself many times why I want my wife to own my sex life and have the power to punish me if I don’t do as she wishes? This isn’t what most people consider to be “normal.” I’m not bothered by whether or not I’m following the herd. I have some understanding of why I think what we are doing makes sense. That doesn’t get to the “why.”

I like to believe that our domestic discipline is a useful relationship tool. It’s based on two very different concepts. The first is that DD provides a way to equalize the power balance in our relationship. I have a fairly dominant personality. Mrs. Lion tends to accept what I want whether or not she agrees with me. My reasoning is that over time, she can build resentment and anger that has to leak out in ways that could endanger our marriage.

My theory is that by giving her the ability to punish me if I upset her or break a rule she has made, she feels more empowered, and by spanking me, she lets me know that I have to change my behavior. Punishing me lets her clean the slate. There is no built-up anger to leak out later. So far, this hasn’t worked out as well as I had hoped. I get punished if I break a rule, but I don’t feel her paddle if I upset her. This may be changing. We’ve been discussing how to improve in this area.

The second reason is that I’m sexually aroused when I think about being spanked. On one level, I want to be spanked. It does something for me sexually. This desire brought me to ask my wife to spank me if I broke a rule. A big reason she agreed is that she understood my need for spanking. This sexual need assures that I will always get into position to accept my spanking.

Orgasm control is a more complicated subject. Before we started male chastity, I got a mild sexual charge when I thought about it. It wasn’t the kind of need I have for spanking. In the past, when I tested male chastity devices, I didn’t find it hot to wear them. When I decided to try wearing a male chastity device in 2013, I wasn’t sure it would be something I would want to do for any length of time. I asked Mrs. Lion to let me try wearing one.

male chastity is a different sort of need

At first, it was a turn-on to be locked in a male chastity device. I liked how it felt when I tried to get hard. What really turned me on was Mrs. Lion unlocking me and jerking me off. I loved that she and she alone could give me sexual pleasure. When she began edging me nearly every day, I wanted to be able to jerk off. Of course, I couldn’t. The male chastity device made sure of that.

Over time, I learned that I wasn’t allowed to masturbate. The male chastity device made sure I couldn’t. Mrs. Lion’s edging sessions reinforced her role as my only sexual outlet. As time passed, I was conditioned not to masturbate. It didn’t matter whether or not I was locked in a male chastity device. I just didn’t do it, no matter how horny I felt. I can’t explain this change. In the years I was caged full time, I changed. I didn’t want to stop masturbating. I couldn’t.

I guess it was a classic case of conditioning. I was trained to stop masturbating. It didn’t matter how aroused I felt. I couldn’t get myself off. I can’t even get myself to the edge. When we started male chastity, I would have laughed if you had asked me if I would never masturbate again. Mrs. Lion’s first rule was that I couldn’t masturbate. At the time, I didn’t take that too seriously. I knew that I couldn’t as long as I was locked in a male chastity device. When out of it, I could and might even do it.

When she made that rule, she was surprised that I jerked off. She had no idea that I did it a couple of times a week when I was alone. That bothered her. She said that it felt like cheating. Cheating? I jerked off when I felt a lot of sexual pressure. It was release for me. Anyway, I had no choice about jerking off. I was locked up all of the time. The rule was moot.

I’m not tempted to do it anymore. It has nothing to do with my desire to obey Mrs. Lion’s rule. I just don’t. I don’t think I could get myself off if I tried. I haven’t made a real effort to find out. I  can usually get myself hard, but I don’t feel myself getting to the edge even if I keep trying. I need a helper to ejaculate. It’s a very good thing I have one.

I started the weekend working on our blog. If I didn’t fuck it up, you should be seeing pages serve up even faster than before. I’m shooting for under two seconds to see a page. I find myself driven deeper and deeper into weird web technology. I won’t bother you with the details. I’ll just say that there is a surprising amount of technology behind this blog. There isn’t too much in front of it.

Mrs. Lion and I tend to circle a subject for a long time before any changes happen. She has her way of processing prospective change. She said she would try to spank me if I interrupted her. She didn’t explicitly call out being a know-it-all or pissing her off in other ways. We’ll have to see.

Even though I write here about new ideas, that doesn’t mean I’m calling the disciplinary shots. I’m not. Mrs. Lion does what she wants. She will try things that I suggest, but that’s as far as my influence goes. The same is true of sex. For example, she agreed to try male chastity and kept me locked in a male chastity device. She started doing it because I asked. She continued because she felt it was working for us.

I don’t think she is very different from most other wives in that respect. They may be convinced to try something, but they won’t keep it up unless it works for them. Extra work is involved when it comes to male chastity or domestic discipline. It takes time to lock and unlock a chastity device. Even if the woman has her husband do it for her, the activity distracts from sexual activity. Spanking is hard work. It takes time and energy to do it.

While many guys roll their eyes at this because they believe male chastity and DD are beneficial to their wives, they are missing a critical point. A loving partnership doesn’t require spanking or orgasm control to work smoothly. Both are “extras” that the male partner requests. If a man has to be locked into a chastity device and driven mad with desire to get him to go down on his wife, guess what? She won’t want him to bother. There is nothing I need to be forced to do if Mrs. Lion wants it.

The same is true of domestic discipline. It’s true that I get punished when I miss a chore or (hopefully) if I annoy Mrs. Lion. That doesn’t mean I need punishment to do these things. It means that I can forget or behave thoughtlessly. If I do, I get spanked because I asked Mrs. Lion to do it. If she had to use her paddle to make me do the right thing, our marriage wouldn’t last. DD provides her a way to clear the slate when I screw up and remind me what  I need to do. It’s what I asked her to do, not what she imposed on me.

The best way to kill male chastity or domestic discipline is to make the practice unpleasant for your partner. Whining and endless references to what you want or expect. It’s no fun to either partner when this happens. It almost guarantees failure. We have a system. I bring up an idea and let Mrs. Lion know about it. If she agrees to try it, I let it go for a while. If I don’t see or feel anything after a few days, I remind her. She’ll tell me if that bothers her, and if it does, I stop. She is in control.

That doesn’t mean that I can never bring up the subject again. I can unless she tells me that she doesn’t want to do whatever I asked. If she follows through on our latest discussion (“Strike Three!“), I will get a strike if she feels pressured. The point is that we have a way to manage my anxiety and her sanity. It works for us.