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In: ED, Male Chastity
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My ED doctor has prescribed a different drug for me to inject, Quadmix. This new drug includes the same three that are in Trimix, but adds one more, Atropine. The new drug relaxes the long muscles in the penis–who knew they were there? This mix is considered the most potent boner maker. I’m sure that the blend I’m getting is one of the weaker mixes. Hopefully, it will work. My first dose is supposed to be .30 ml.

I’m going to try it tonight after my shower. I’m writing this post on Tuesday afternoon. I have an unrelated doctor’s appointment at three. We’ll pick up the Quadmix after that. When we get home, I’ll shower and try the new drug. Maybe it will do its magic, and a nice, firm, long-lasting boner will result. I’m hoping for an insertion-grade erection that lasts at least an hour. Stay tuned for results.

I suppose that needing a drug like this is a very strong form of male chastity. I can’t masturbate or do anything else sexual without getting my injection of boner juice. Control my supply of the drug, and you control my ability to have sex, no hardware needed. While it isn’t a formal rule, I always ask permission to get an injection of the medication. Mrs. Lion has full control of my sexual abilities. We haven’t discussed this as part of her power to control sex. It isn’t necessary. She’s controlled that for the last ten years.

The fact that her sexual control is deeply embedded in our relationship makes it more difficult to write about male chastity. It isn’t a novelty for us. I haven’t masturbated in ten years. We couldn’t stop if we wanted to. She is in charge, and that’s that. It isn’t a fantasy for us. It doesn’t even feel sexy to me. It’s just the way we live. I wish it did feel newer and sexier. It’s a little unfair that the novelty has worn off. I still like it and I’m glad we started all those years ago.

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In: Male Chastity, Masturbation

When I was a boy, I had no close contact with any girls. All of my friends were other boys. We were all intensely curious about girls, but we didn’t know how to approach one. When I was eleven, an older boy (0ne year older) taught me how to masturbate, well, he jerked me off, and I loved it. Before that after-school lesson, I had no idea what it meant when I had an erection. They just appeared.

I never got a chance to learn about girls. When I was 13, my parents sent me to an all-boys boarding school. I was shy and avoided any dances or other boy-girl social events. When I graduated at eighteen, I was a virgin and had never seen a naked girl. There was no boy-boy fooling around at my school; at least, I never knew of any. I went off to college with absolutely no sexual knowledge beyond jerking off.

That meant I considered masturbating a normal part of my life. I didn’t consider it a substitute for sex. It was sex. I didn’t lose my virginity until late in my freshman year. It was a fumbling attempt in my bedroom on a break. I was home, and my mother was off on a vacation. A girl I slightly knew in school was in New York; she came to my apartment in Brooklyn. We were both virgins with no real sexual education. We made out, and things progressed until we were naked. I had an idea of what came next and did my best. It didn’t take me long to finish. She seemed happy, and I fell asleep.

Later, when I transferred to NYU and found a studio apartment in an old hotel, we resumed our romance. It turned out that my first experience wasn’t really what we thought. When we had the time and had both read a marriage manual, we discovered that her hymen was still in place and very thick. I couldn’t get past it without hurting her. We went back to the book and discovered oral sex. We did that until we finally broke up.

It was interesting that we never masturbated one another. To my knowledge, she never played with herself. I continued to jerk off, filling in between dates. Masturbation remained something I did for myself. Later, when I was married, my wife would jerk me off or have me do it while she “helped” by tickling my balls.

My point is that by the time I was having regular sex with a woman, jerking off was an embedded habit that I considered as normal as eating and sleeping. Most of the women I dated claimed they never masturbated and had little interest in me using my hand to get them off.

I considered that odd but chalked it off as yet another difference between men and women. It never occurred to me that a woman would find it odd that I got myself off. I’m not sure that most even knew that I did it. Yes, they would jerk me off sometimes, but I suspect were unaware that I provided that service to myself as well.

When I asked Mrs. Lion to lock me in a male chastity device, she asked me why I wanted her to do that. I told her that it would prevent me from jerking off. She looked surprised and asked me, “Do you do that?” I told her that I did it once or twice a week. She looked a little upset. Since our male chastity conversation was about her taking control, she promptly said, “Your first rule is that you can’t masturbate.”

“Are you serious?” I asked. “How can I masturbate if I’m locked in this thing.” I pointed to the male chastity device in her hand. She replied that this rule had nothing to do with my wearing a male chastity device. She then told me to jerk off while she watched. She wanted to see how I did it. I did, and she watched. That was in December 2013. It was the last time I masturbated since then.

it didn’t make sense to me

From that night on, I was locked in a male chastity device full-time. She unlocked me for teasing and eventual release. There were times I was wild (uncaged) because the device I was wearing irritated me. Mrs. Lion made it clear that her rule was still in force. I obeyed. I did because I liked the idea of her sexual control. It was new and exciting. When she jerked me off, it was big fun.

I still wondered why she cared if I masturbated. It wasn’t that I couldn’t get it up and satisfy her if she wanted sex. I didn’t particularly like porn. What was wrong with jerking off once or twice a week? I’ve been doing it since I was eleven years old. I tried to understand her strong feelings about it.

Mrs. Lion never masturbated. After we discussed my habit and she had me locked up, she said that she tried it and didn’t enjoy it. Well, I didn’t always enjoy it. That wasn’t the point. Jerking off relieved pressure and relaxed me. When I was single, I did it every night as a way to encourage sleep. It was never the same as sex with a partner. I’m not sure that I would even say it was usually fun. It was just something that got my mind off sex

I was surprised that she cared at all. To me, it was just a thing I did, like eating and peeing. Yes, I did it in private. I would be embarrassed if she caught me doing it. I knew it was sort of naughty. I think that came from my childhood when it seemed like something I shouldn’t do. Still, I didn’t think it was bad or cheating. It was private behavior.

Mrs. Lion was the first woman who objected to me doing it. I’m not exactly sure how much other partners knew of my occasional jerk-off sessions, but I know that some liked to watch me do it. Some used “helping” me as an excuse to avoid expending energy on sex when they weren’t in the mood. For the first seven years of my marriage to Mrs. Lion, the subject never came up. She assumed that since she didn’t masturbate, neither did I.

Now that I’m coming up on a decade without jerking off, I still don’t really understand why Mrs. Lion has such strong feelings about it. It’s no longer an issue to me. I’m not sure I could jerk off to orgasm anymore. She seems to like owning my orgasms even after all these years.

I’m pretty sure that I would have cheated a little and jerked off if I wasn’t locked in a male chastity device. During those weeks of freedom, I was acutely aware of our male chastity arrangement and I didn’t dare do anything to break it. After all, jerking off was never big fun. It was pressure release. Wearing a male chastity device taught me to handle and even enjoy the pressure. It was fun to be forced to be horny. That’s very different than being horny because my partner wasn’t interested in sex. We were playing a fun game that stressed me in a good way.

If more women understood how easily they could manage the sexual pressure they feel from their partners, they might be more interested in promoting male chastity. From my experience, it taught me to enjoy not getting sex when I want it. It became fun to feel the growing pressure to get off. It was part of the game. Instead of ignoring the difference in our interest in sexual release, Mrs. Lion used it to make my needs fun for me.

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In: Male Chastity, Sex

The days crawl by, and nothing sexual is happening. It isn’t just Mrs. Lion’s fault, I’m not feeling very frisky. She hasn’t tried to arouse me in a couple of days. If my penis could bang a tin cup on the bars of its cage, it would. I’m not sure how much luck I’ll have when I’m unlocked, but I would like to find out. Meanwhile, the security screw holding my Jail Bird on my penis works itself loose every day. At night, before going to sleep, I check it. The last thing I want is for the screw to get lost. It’s expensive and annoying to get a new one from Mature Metal.

Apparently, I haven’t annoyed Mrs. Lion or interrupted her. My bottom remains pristine and unblemished by her paddle. It’s been two weeks since my last ride on the spanking bench. Mrs. Lion has been making more of an effort to make loving physical contact. I like that a lot. For the last few days, I’ve been sleeping a lot. On Tuesday, I watched a movie and snoozed after lunch. I never made it back to my keyboard. Then, after dinner I snoozed during some of the TV we were watching. Maybe I have a low-grade bug.

As you can see, the pace of action here has slowed to a crawl. Of course, keeping me in a male chastity device is a sort of silent reminder that all sexual pleasure belongs to my lioness. Before this most recent lockup, I think she was  OK with enough self-stimulation to let me get hard and aroused. Of course, that’s impossible now. My only erections are produced by her. I’m not complaining. So far, I haven’t felt a strong need for self-expression.

This post is a little like the Jerry Seinfeld show; it’s about nothing. I’ve been wondering if we should stop posting daily and wait for something to happen before publishing anything new. It’s something to think about.

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In: Male Chastity, Spanking

Things change. That’s no surprise to anyone. Even kink changes over time. We change what we call things. BDSM was “Leather” a decade ago. No biggie. The Internet tends to shorten things and loves initials. There have been more interesting changes. Take spanking, for example.

In 2010 it was a big deal to talk about spanking on the “bare.” Somehow, the erotic connotations of exposing a naked bottom added spice to the spanking conversation. It always seemed odd to me. In all my years in the BDSM community, I never saw a spanking that wasn’t on a bare bottom. But “on the bare” was an important component in spanking discussions.

That’s changed. I almost never see references to the exposure of the bottom in the context of spanking. I’m glad because references to pants up or down seem childish. Conversations center on much more relevant topics. Also, I’ve noticed that there is less talk about the actual act of spanking. Very few things are written with blow-by-blow accounts. The talk is more about the reason for the spanking and the results once it’s done.

Male chastity has also evolved. When we started this blog in 2014, chastity device discussions centered around “security.” People worried about being able to escape the device for a jerkoff session. The result was that a lot of men had to lubricate their base rings to avoid chafing. Unauthorized removal fears trumped comfort. Silly, when you think about it. Men initiate male chastity. Why would they want to cheat after working hard to get their partners to lock them up?

Another change was shorter cages. I would like to think that I had something to do with that bit of evolution. When I started male chastity, I followed measurement instructions and ordered a Jail Bird with a 2-1/2 inch cage. It didn’t take me long to realize that there were times my penis was shorter and there was space in the front of the cage. The result was that peeing became a messy challenge. It sprayed when it hit the bars in the front.

I went through two rounds of shortening. I finally ended up with a one-inch cage. It was barely long enough to contain the head of my penis. As a result, my urethra remained centered, and urination was no problem. Also, the device was comfortable to wear. I have it on now and forget it’s there. Holy Trainer and others offer off-the-shelf cages that are very short, like mine. The purpose of a male chastity device is to prevent erections and unauthorized masturbation. My tiny Jail Bird does that perfectly.

It seems to me that the combination of easy access to information and the ability to share the reality of these kinks allows us to learn from one another. It’s exciting that our exotic practices can find communities that support positive growth. Yay Internet!