We started this blog several weeks after Mrs. Lion agreed to lock my penis in a chastity device. That was just about seven years ago. Our blogiversary is on February 7. A lot of similar blogs started at this time of  year. It has to be more than a coincidence. Maybe the cold winter weather has something to do with it–indoor sport, you know. I was very lucky. Mrs. Lion agreed to play.

Other guys aren’t this lucky. Some don’t have partners and still want to experience being made to wait for a chance to ejaculate. Other, married guys may not feel able to ask their partners to play. When we started out, the Web was filled with suggested ways to ask a wife to lock up her husband. I’m sure you can search out these form letters and scripts. I think most of us tend to over complicate things and that’s what causes problems with partners.

I doubt that any man wakes up one morning and decides, “I want my wife to lock me in a male chastity device.” Nope, it doesn’t happen that way. Lots of reading and fantasizing lead up to asking her to do it. That’s normal and fine. Male chastity fantasies are hot to the men who enjoy them. They are very unlikely to turn on a woman. Let’s look at it from her side.

How to ask your partner to lock your cock

First thing, male chastity is a game. It isn’t a lifestyle or religion. It’s a sexual game. This is a key point. If you have any chance at all of convincing your partner to lock your cock, you need to be very clear about exactly what she is expected to do. I know, the fantasies have her portrayed as a cruel mistress who will keep you locked and horny. She will make you do housework and wear panties. She expects you to give her endless oral orgasms as a way to convince her to unlock  you and jerk  you off.

Those are hot fantasies. They don’t work in real life, at least when  you start out. In order to play the male chastity game with you, she has to love you enough to go to the extra trouble the game requires. That means she isn’t a man-hating bitch who wants to see you suffer. Any suggestion that is how you want her to act will almost certainly doom your efforts.

If you suggest that she will get more orgasms if she locks you up, she may well feel hurt and insulted. You are her partner. It’s  your pleasure to give her orgasms. You don’t need to be blackmailed into getting her off, right? If you do, Male chastity is the last thing you need.

Instead, have a much easier conversation with her. Don’t write an email or letter. Talk with her face to face. The first thing to say is that you discovered something that turns you on. She will probably want to know what it is. Tell her it is a sort of game where she decides when you get an orgasm. That may puzzle her. Tell her that it’s very hot for  you to be teased and not be allowed to come. You love the idea of being kept horny for days (Yes, days, not months!).

That sounds pretty harmless to most women. You can also tell her about male chastity devices that assure you won’t jerk off when she isn’t around. When I said that to Mrs. Lion, she was surprised I masturbated. She told me that she didn’t want me to do that. I was amazed she didn’t know I did it and since I was telling her I wanted her to control my orgasms, I could hardly argue with being prohibited from jerking off.

She seemed a little amused about locking me in a male chastity device, and agreed to do it. Later, I learned that she figured I would want out after a short time. Before putting the male chastity device on me, she told me to jerk off one last time. She said she wanted to watch and learn how I do it. I did and then she locked me up.

In the beginning that was pretty much all. She did agree to unlock me and tease me at least every other day. She experimented with different times between orgasms. At first, she jerked me off every day. That was too much for me. Then, she tried different times. She still varies my wait times. We tried other things too. I’ll write about them in a future post.

The key to getting yourself locked into a male chastity device is to make the process as easy as possible for your partner. All  you really need her to do is to keep the key and unlock you now and then for a chance to ejaculate.  Easy peasy!

In so many ways 2020 is a year we all want to forget. Our 100-year plague struck as COVID-19. Everything changed. Here in the US, the complete lack of national leadership made us the most severely impacted country in the world. I’m out of work as a direct result of the pandemic. The term “pivot” has come into popular use to describe the ways we adapt to the disease. 2021 isn’t shaping up much better. We have a new president. He’s a political hack, but at least he cares about the country. There is a good chance that he will appoint good people and clean up the mess that the worst president in American history has made.

2020 was also the year I had the least orgasms since we began tracking. It was 33 versus 51 for 2019. I’m not sure that means anything. Some people think that the lower that number goes, the better I’m under female control. I totally disagree. That implies that the objective of male chastity is to eliminate ejaculation. That makes absolutely no sense to me.

You don’t demonstrate control by extinguishing something. You have control when you decide when the male gets to come. Mrs. Lion has absolute control over me in that area. I haven’t had a single orgasm that she didn’t supply. That’s control! If she believes I don’t need to ejaculate more than once every ten to fourteen days then that’s what I get. In 2020, my average was an orgasm every eleven days. All were either handjobs or oral. Since June, all but one was oral. I think it’s hot that my sex life is controlled this way. Essentially, I’m milked on a regular basis that doesn’t require my input. That’s the essence of male chastity. I like losing control.

2020 was also a year that our disciplinary relationship changed a bit. Mrs. Lion has been less focused on our FLR. Her routines have changed. She is working from home and hasn’t developed the rhythm she had when she commuted. She is less inclined to punish me for anything other than forgetting to set up the coffee pot. I haven’t been punished for anything else in months. I would like to say that I didn’t do anything else wrong, but that’s not true. She seems less inclined to be a disciplinary wife lately. Part of the reason for this might be that she hasn’t been feeling as well as usual. Part may be inertia.

I’ve also noticed that male chastity devices seem more popular. I’m basing this on pictures I’ve seen on twitter and other social media. Most of the devices appear to be the cheap Chinese cages. Every single one I’ve seen are too big for the penis inside it, some by more than an inch. I suppose that’s inevitable. In case you know someone who doesn’t get it, remind him that the end of the cage should always be in firm contact with the head of the penis.

Perhaps 2021 will be a better year in that respect. Maybe my ejaculate production will be allowed to go up as well. I doubt that. I hope that we can get back to the much more active disciplinary relationship that we had before. I think we were both happier. Stay tuned.

Mrs. Lion didn’t write a post yesterday. She lost a close member of her family and needs time to regroup. As you probably know, she doesn’t like to show her feelings, but she was very sad. It wasn’t unexpected. No matter how much you prepare for something like this, it’s still a shock. We will snuggle and if she wants to talk about it, I will listen.

I appear to be broken again. On Thursday night, Mrs. Lion put in a valiant effort to get me to the edge. She couldn’t. That was 19 days since my last orgasm. I don’t know what’s wrong. I’m hoping that when she is in the mood to try again, I’ll be more responsive. She suggested that we play Spankardy on Thursday. By Final Jeopardy, I had amassed 58 swats. I bet just 10 on final. It was a category I don’t feel comfortable with. To both of our surprise, I answered correctly. Mrs. Lion gave me 48 swats. It was fun to play again. It’s been months since the last time.

We are starting our eighth year of male chastity. It was this week in December 2013 that I asked my lioness to lock me in a chastity device. She was sure I would quickly lose interest. I don’t think she had a real idea what it was about. But right from the beginning things changed. The big revelation was that I masturbated. Mrs. Lion had no idea I did that. I was shocked to learn that. I was even more surprised when she told me that she hated the idea of me jerking off. Her first rule was that I  could never do that again. She made it clear that she was serious. It really bothered her that I had been doing it.

We discussed it that first night. She surprised me again by telling me to jerk off while she watched. Given her dislike of the practice, I was confused and said so. She replied that she wanted to see my technique. She figured that if she copied what I did, she would have the most success giving me handjobs. She is a very good student.

In the years that followed, I never jerked off again. I also learned to live with a limited, controlled number of ejaculations. How many and how often are topics of conversation we share. Mrs. Lion is perfectly comfortable asking me how horny I am. Surprisingly, she is happy to tell me that it doesn’t matter. I will ejaculate when she decides to get me off.

All these years later, that doesn’t seem startling or unusual to me. But I wonder how many other men’s orgasms are topics of dinner conversation? Nothing is private about my sex life. It might have bothered me at one point, but now it is just the way things are.

I can’t figure out if the pandemic is affecting interest in male chastity and domestic discipline. In one sense the need for quarantine and social distancing would encourage couples to do things at home that don’t include other people. Male chastity and domestic discipline certainly fall into that category. Maybe I can help encourage some sexual fun with a slightly different slant on these activities. Let’s start with definitions. These definitions are not all-encompassing, just designed to get folks started with some sexy fun.

Domestic discipline

You can think of this as a penalty game. One partner agrees to accept the discipline and the other administers it. Some couples switch off and take turns. In our house, Mrs. Lion is in charge and disciplines me. She has selected spanking as her preferred method of discipline. This is a good choice for many. Over 85% of adults have spanking fantasies.

The rules that if broken, earn a spanking can be anything you agree on. They can be trivial things the spankee is bound to break, or they can be real behavioral issues. We started off with trivial rules I would be likely to break. I had to avoid getting food on my shirt. OK, it’s true, I’m a messy eater. You get the idea. Both partners are expected to observe and report infractions. When a rule is broken, a spanking or other penalty results.

We have written endlessly about how to spank and what to use to administer it. The menu bar on the top of this page has some spanking articles. Spankings are always administered on a naked bottom. There are no exceptions to this. If one is earned where it is impossible to administer, you can do it at the spanker’s convenience. Mrs. Lion sometimes spanks me days later. It’s your choice what to use to spank. This is a fun topic to share with the spankee.

Domestic Discipline (DD) can start as a fun game and then over time become a useful part of marriage. It has happened this way with us. Believe it or not, I actually almost never spill food on my shirt. That wasn’t the intention, but apparently, DD actually works! Most men and women get aroused thinking about being spanked. They may not like it when they get one, but overall it is a very sexy activity.

Male chastity

Everything about male chastity is sexy fun. The idea is simple. The man agrees to not masturbate and gives his partner the power to decide when he gets to ejaculate. To make it more interesting, his partner may tease him and have him get her off while he remains frustrated. A very exciting form of teasing is edging. The woman masturbates her partner right to the very edge of ejaculation and stops. She gives him a little time to come down and then does it again. Rinse and repeat.

Edging is the closest a male can get to multiple orgasms. I’ve learned to love it. This sort of thing goes on for days without letting him come. Eventually, he gets to ejaculate. Many women find that one ejaculation every 7 to 10 days is optimum. There are no rules about this other than she gets to decide. He gets no input.

You can add a bondage element to the game by getting a male chastity device and locking it over his penis. There are lots of posts and pages about this here. The point is that it’s fun for both partners with or without a device.

Both Domestic discipline and male chastity offer sexy fun for bored quarantined couples. Mrs. Lion and I have a lot of fun with both.