By:
In: Edging, Spanking

Last night, as promised, I tied Lion to the bed and whomped his poor buns. He said he never asked to be whomped. True. He said he just wanted to be tied down. True. Be careful what you ask for.

Once he was restrained I got out my whomping sticks. I told him which ones I had and ran them across his butt. I started out with my hand then I moved on to a crop that has a leather hand-shaped head. This crop amuses me. Lion says horse people like silly crops. I think kinky people must have some input in that area too.

When I finally started hitting him with the crop, he said it hurt and started to squirm. I told him he shouldn’t move. He said it really hurt. Good. It’s supposed to. He kept squirming. He said he didn’t want it to hurt so much. I don’t remember asking him. I remember taking into account the fact that he wanted to be restrained. I remember promising to play with him. I don’t remember asking him how he wanted me to play with him or how much he wanted it to hurt. Nope. That was my decision. And I decided it should hurt a little more than usual.

I wasn’t looking to leave a mark. I just wanted him to feel it. He hasn’t really been whomped in a long time. Sure, I’ve spanked him recently, but not really very hard. A Lion needs a good, hard whomping every now and then.

Earlier in the evening he said he was horny. I should have sprung into action then. By ten he was not as horny. I managed to edge him once, but then he went soft again. When we were hunkered down for the night, he said I am very good at making him very horny. Perfect!

 

By:
In: Female led relationship with discipline, Lion's Journal, Male Chastity

Our trip is drawing to a close. We will be on our way home today. Sunday was a quiet day around the campground. We took a trip into town to upload our posts and then explored the local area; then back to camp for lunch. Later, we took the dog swimming in the lake. Well, not swimming, she wades up to her chest and then sticks her head in the water and blows bubbles. The water was very warm and refreshing. I waded too.

There’s a lot to be said about being uncaged. I’ve enjoyed the feeling of freedom. Sunday night I was lying on top of the bed and commented that it felt good to be naked, then I said that I was generally naked. “Not this naked,” Mrs. Lion said pointedly. I gave her a blank look. Just as she said, “You usually wear a cage.” The light came on in my head and I nodded.

I said, “It’s really nice this way.”

She replied, “I’m sure it is but you will be back in your cage soon.”

So much for my pubic service announcement in favor of wild lions. Saturday, after our punishment/play activity I mentioned that I thought I would be tied down. She told me that could be arranged. That didn’t happen Sunday night. Maybe Mrs. Lion was giving me time to recharge my sexual battery. I’m writing this Monday morning so we can upload it when we go to town. Perhaps tonight (Monday) the camper bondage equipment will be used. I did notice that she kept the very nasty wooden spoon on her nightstand. She usually returns it to her toy bag. Monday is punishment day but I haven’t accrued any swats so far.

Mrs. Lion continues to be more assertive. She hasn’t gotten to the point of just telling me what to do, but she makes decisions when I ask for them. This is fine. I’m not sure that a working Female Led Marriage (FLM) is the dominatrix fantasy where the male is little more than a pet. For the record, I never had a fantasy like that. When I bottomed in the past, I was tied down and got sensation play. I don’t think I could manage the dictatorial “mommy” role that many men report their dominant wives take. I don’t believe their reports are accurate. That’s just fantasy.

Our model appears to be evolving into one where I remain an independent big kitty, but I am required to ask for permission when feasible. That means when Mrs. Lion is available, I must ask before doing. For example, when I wanted to take a shower last night, I asked first. Or, before dressing or undressing I also ask. I think it would be cool if she told me to undress sometimes. That might be a safe first step in more assertive domination. When we are out, she does ask me if I would like to go look at one place or another, but I hope that if there is somewhere she wants to go, that she just goes there without checking with me.

I think there is a fine line between sensible FLM and fantasy D/S scenes. Our model has to work all the time. I also think that like enforced chastity, FLM has to evolve. A year ago Mrs. Lion would have allowed me to be wild anytime I wanted. (I may be wrong about that, but it is the sense I got.) Now, I have no doubt that my input isn’t relevant as to when the cage goes back on and when it may come off again for a short time. She has taken full control of my sexuality. Neither of us question that.

If you look back at our posts during the summer of 2014, Mrs. Lion questions herself and her ability to be my keyholder. This summer she shows no such hesitation or self-questioning about chastity. She has new questions now. But like enforced chastity, it won’t be long before she owns that role too. Her style is a deliberate one where she takes very small steps. Sometimes they are too small. She generally recognizes that and the pace increases. One of the nice benefits of daily postings is the ability to look back and see where we were a year or more ago. I am very surprised at how much we have both changed. I am far less assertive and much more willing to wait until Mrs. Lion chooses to let me orgasm. Even since March, I am beginning to internalize her role as my disciplining wife. The spankings hurt just as much, but I’m better able to understand and accept that I will get them or worse if I attempt to escape. I wonder if other couples evolve this way

By:
In: Female led relationship with discipline, Mrs Lion Comments

Today is our last day away. Tomorrow we begin our five hour journey home. I’m sorry we have to go back. Despite our rocky start on Thursday, our mini vacations are a welcome distraction from our finances.

Yesterday was fairly quiet. I hadn’t slept well the night before so I took a few catnaps throughout the day. We went on a little adventure and found a different campground for future reference. We took the dog for a swim and had dinner outside. Even though we’re camping, we don’t spend a lot of time outside. Generally it’s too hot to spend much time out of our air conditioned luxury.

I continued to make decisions yesterday. I know they seem like tiny decisions, but since I’m not used to making decisions I need to get used to making them. What to eat, when to eat, when to go to bed. I really dislike making all the decisions but if I let even one go by I’m afraid I’ll stop making any. I can’t return to my inertia state.

We didn’t play last night. I was tired. We snuggled while watching TV. It’s always nice to be close to Lion. While snuggling I asked him about his buns. He said they didn’t hurt for very long after I swatted him the night before. I didn’t think they would, but I had hoped he would have some lasting effect of my chomping. Nope. I thought I bit him very hard. I guess I’ll have to improve my technique. Lion hide really is tough.

Tonight we’ll play. I have no real plans for him. I’m fairly certain he’ll be edged, but beyond that I don’t know. Being on vacation doesn’t lend itself to having definite plans. At least I don’t think so. Lion, of course, likes to have plans. Just one more way we’re opposite.

 

By:
In: Female led relationship with discipline, Lion's Journal, Punishment, Spanking

There were more than fireworks here on July fourth. We sat on a grassy knoll and watched a surprisingly good fireworks display over the lake here. It rivaled the rather pathetic displays at home. After the fireworks, we returned to our trailer. Then the real fireworks began. Mrs. Lion said she had special plans. First, she announced that since she moved punishment night from Thursday to Friday, then logically, Saturday would be maintenance spanking day. She also reminded me that I wrote that maintenance spankings should be at the same intensity as punishments, the better to make her more comfortable administering strict punishments. So she did. Well, not quite as hard as punishment swats, but she used her heavy wooden spoon with the non-slip sandpaper coating. It really stung. She wasn’t done then. Next, she bit my butt hard enough to get an “ouch” from me. The next morning I didn’t feel the bites or spanking. I guess next time will be even more energetic.

She had me roll over and then gave me great oral sex, pausing frequently when I got close. Finally, as promised, she took me all the way. It was amazing! Next came her surprise. She rolled over onto her back and told me to give her an orgasm or three. Once more she reminded me that I wrote about this as a good way to train males to not associate their arousal with giving orgasms. Having just ejaculated, I wasn’t at all aroused while pleasing her. I still had a great time. I don’t need to be turned on to love giving her orgasms. This is also something of a record. She went from early February until June 28 without coming. Now, only six days later she wanted another orgasm. I hope this is a sign that she is more interested in sex. She seemed a bit “damp” when I started. Perhaps getting me off turns her on a little. I would love that.

This is the longest we have had a break in over a year. It certainly feels very good to escape the pressure we are under at home. Of course nothing is actually better, but we can allow ourselves to forget for a few days. There are two large wild fires burning within fifty miles of here. One of them had just started when we were driving by on one of our adventures. It was the first time I saw a giant pine tree catch fire from top to bottom in a couple of seconds. After we went shopping, on our way home, we stopped and watched helicopters scoop up giant buckets of water from a lake and then drop the water on the fire. It was frightening and fascinating. Our route home takes us right past one of them. We hope that the road will not be closed and force us to detour over a hundred miles.

Mrs. Lion has been making more decisions. They are the daily sort that I frequently make, like what to have for dinner or breakfast. I’m doing my best to ask before doing things. This may seem like small stuff to many, but for us it is a sea change. This trip helps us with it. We are away from home and our habits there. In this more neutral setting it is easier for me to establish new patterns. There is certainly progress.

One area we have discussed but not yet advanced is discipline as needed. Corrections are now based on a rather small set of behavioral rules. Mrs. Lion is getting more consistent enforcing them. A while ago she mentioned that she wanted to respond more at the time of the infraction. That’s logistically much more difficult. But as I think about it, it makes sense in that it will focus us both on the FLM when it is most needed. How this is done when we are at, say, a supermarket is unclear to me. It may require different punishments that don’t require my bare bottom, or a delay until we have privacy. In any case, I am doing my best to avoid forcing her to punish me. I know it is very difficult for her. Maybe the next step is spanking at home at the time of infraction. If I do something in pubic, we can discuss it and she can correct me later. FLM is much harder for me than enforced chastity.