By:
In: Spanking
lion head paddle
This lion head paddle is a work of art. If we get it, I will get to enjoy it visually and viscerally. Click here to visit the craftsman’s site.

Every so often, when I’m in a masochistic mood, I go paddle shopping. Usually, it doesn’t result in a purchase. Truth be told, Mrs. Lion has more paddles than she can ever use. Also, spankings in our house are of a disciplinary nature, even when there is no offense to punish. Those spankings are to help Mrs. Lion develop her technique and for me to remember my place. Unlike BDSM-style spankings of yore, they don’t cater to my desire for thud or sting.

Mrs. Lion has settled on her spanking spoon (I think) as her go-to lion-disciplining tool. Its long handle and new golf-club grip suit her needs—more about that in a bit. Anyway, I found a paddle that may not be very suitable for spanking me but is truly a work of art. It’s the lion engraved paddle illustrated here. Its odd shape and rather sharp edges suggest it may not work well for hards swats but could make an interestingly-shaped mark on my bottom. It’s 3/4-inch thick and definitely a bruiser.

I suppose it is odd for me to consider implements designed to punish me as art. I can’t help it. Spanking-as-punishment is relatively new to me. For most of my adult life, it was a very hot BDSM activity. Ok, it still is. Yes, thinking about getting spanked arouses me even though I know that I will absolutely hate it when Mrs. Lion spanks me. I don’t like the pain one bit. Yet, we both know I need it.

Even if you don’t share our interest in spanking, I think you probably agree that the lion paddle is a beautiful piece of craftsmanship. Almost all of our paddles are examples of very good craftsmanship. Most are also diabolically painful when applied to my bare bottom.

If paddles can be considered art, can the results they produce also be evaluated in aesthetic terms? Mrs. Lion tries to produce an even, dark shade of red over most of my ass and upper thighs. This is a challenge since I don’t redden easily. It takes work and extensive application of a paddle to get my hindquarters a deep red. I suspect that the spanking spoon isn’t the best tool to develop the base color. When applied with sufficient force, its face is small and is as likely to bruise as reddening. A lighter, larger paddle is probably best for background color.

Those paddles tend to sting a lot. I wouldn’t say I like sting, in case you want to know. Ok, you don’t. Anyway, several minutes with a lighter paddle will produce a nice red. Then, switching to the trusty spanking spoon will result in those marks Mrs. Lion likes and that I will feel for several days. Of course, if she doesn’t care about painting my rear, then the spanking spoon or another heavy paddle will produce the DWC results.

From my reading, it’s clear that the DWC and other domestic discipline advocates don’t care about aesthetics in either the paddle or the look of a spanked bottom. I know that Mrs. Lion has mentioned going for a nice red color. Based on my last punishment, I think she has lost interest in the visual appeal of my ass. She wants it to hurt while she spanks me and for days afterward. I can’t argue with that. I support it. I’m advocating ten-minute minimum spankings. I know how my bottom will look after one of them.

By:
In: Male Chastity, Punishment, Spanking

When we started our sexual adventures, it was hard to imagine that I would actually be willing to stay locked in a male chastity device for more than a day or two. Mrs. Lion figured I would want out in a few days. That first male chastity device was uncomfortable but bearable. I can’t explain why I didn’t ask Mrs. Lion to stop locking me up. I obviously found it exciting in a nice, kinky way. Over time, wearing a male chastity device became part of me. It only came off for teasing or orgasms and medical procedures.

Looking back, I can see how far we have come. At this point, sex for me is totally controlled by Mrs. Lion. It isn’t something we even think about. I wait until she decides to let me come. More recently, I’ve had trouble getting to the edge, much less ejaculating. Now, the rules changed a bit. I not only have to wait until my lioness wants me to come, if I don’t ejaculate when she wants, I also get punished. So far, I have performed for her. If she makes it more challenging, I’ll either learn or get spanked.

This is a variation on the old “come on command” fantasy. In it, the man is trained to ejaculate when ordered with little or no stimulation. That never worked for us or anyone else we know. This variation is absolutely doable. Mrs. Lion will tell me that I am to have an orgasm tonight. Then she will stimulate me. If I come in a reasonable time, before she tires, then all is well. If I don’t, out comes the paddle for a disciplinary spanking. The reverse is true too. If Mrs. Lion doesn’t tell me I can ejaculate, and I do anyway, I get another visit from the business end of Mrs. Lion’s paddle. It’s like everything else in my life. If I do as I am told, all is well.

The other big change over time is punishment. It’s gone from slightly stinging spankings to almost DWC punishments. Mrs. Lion has steadily increased the severity and length of my spankings. I’m sure that only a couple of years ago, Mrs. Lion wouldn’t recognize the change in her disciplinary style. I applaud her efforts. It seems that the more severely she punishes me, the loving feelings I get for her care and devotion to me. The old DWC saying, “The longer and harder you spank, the more he will love you for it.”

Two years ago, I thought that saying was rubbish; spanking fantasy talk. I was wrong. Damned if it isn’t true for me. I’m not saying that I want more. It’s just that as Mrs. Lion makes the spankings harder and longer, I end up appreciating her more. These two kinks we adopted have made changes in me. I can’t imagine my life being any different.

By:
In: Punishment, Spanking

After my post about a DWC spanking, I mentioned to Mrs. Lion that it might be interesting to have a support group for disciplinary wives. She responded that she wouldn’t be like the other women who would attend. She based this on her readings on the Web. She doesn’t spank me because it is fun for her. She treats it like something I need. She gets the impression that other disciplinary wives are much more enthusiastic advocates of blistering their husbands’ bottoms.

It makes sense that posts and articles on the Web would present husband spanking in extreme terms. The writers know that most of the readers are men who use the material as fodder for masturbation. Harder and redder make hotter reading. A novice or even advanced spanker could feel that the account isn’t like her experience. This is true of the Disciplinary Wives Club website as well. The advice, as well as the “letters,” describe very severe disciplinary spankings.

As I am learning, these accounts are almost certainly accurate. The problem is that the writers have been actively involved with spanking for a long time. Many were spanked as children. Learning to spank an adult is more an adjustment than something brand new. The real-life experiences for almost everyone are probably similar to ours. We are evolving and have been doing so for years. Mrs. Lion is making excellent progress. The condition of my bottom when she finishes is good evidence of that.

This discussion started when Julie of strictjuliespanks published this post. She was inspired by a letter on the DWC website. This letter was a very detailed account of a disciplinary spanking. I think it is accurate and isn’t too different from how Mrs. Lion spanks me. A few months ago, I was sure that both Mrs. Lion and I would have considered it fiction. Mrs. Lion still believes it is not what she wants to do. I find that odd.

My spankings are no joke. I think that Mrs. Lion is more like the letter writer than she thinks. There are a few differences. The biggest one is that the DWC offered a fairly standardized approach to husband spanking. I think it makes sense. As far as I can tell, this is how a DWC spanking is performed:

  1. It is timed — A timer is used to assure that the spanking’s duration is at least as long as planned. The DWC calls for a ten-minute minimum duration. Some wives add five minutes for any additional offenses. The key takeaway is the use of a timing device. The spanking doesn’t necessarily end when the timer goes off, but it always goes at least that long.
  2. Long warmup — There is a long warmup of several minutes before the serious swatting begins. The warmup is a gradual buildup of intensity to give the husband time to “settle in.” I get the impression this goes on for about three minutes.
  3. The beating builds in intensity — The spanker gradually increases force and speed.
  4. It isn’t continuous — Ten minutes of spanking is hard work. When the spanker gets tired, she pauses for a few seconds to recover. She doesn’t pause to make it easier on her husband.

Based on my experience, the timer and ten-minute duration are the most fearsome and useful. I really get the message when Mrs. Lion keeps going. I get desperate for her to stop. When she doesn’t, the fact that I am powerless really sinks in. That’s why I finally realize that the DWC instruction is correct. I also understand why Mrs. Lion or another wife who isn’t fully immersed in corporal husband punishment would be put off. Speaking as a spanked husband, I can say that the DWC method is correct, at least for me.

By:
In: Spanking, Orgasm denial

Lion’s latest wait was six days. We hadn’t really been doing much in those six days to make him hornier. I spanked him a few times, trying to figure out over-the-knee positions. I teased him a few times. He’s been reading a lot about spanking and that tends to get his motor running. It’s been sort of a slippery slope lately. He said he feels some pressure to perform and that may be making it more difficult to do so. He suggested he should be spanked if he couldn’t have an orgasm. Apparently, that would give him more incentive. I agreed but added the option of telling him when I didn’t want him to have an orgasm so he didn’t have a punishment hanging over his head. Now he’ll get spanked if he doesn’t have an orgasm when I want it as well as if he has one when I don’t want it.

He wasn’t sure if he was horny last night. That’s fine. I wasn’t sure if I wanted him to have an orgasm. While we were both deciding our preferences, I sucked him. There was no pressure on either of us. At some point, we both decided he should have an orgasm. Afterward, he said when I asked him if he wanted one, I’d already activated the launch codes and he really, really wanted one. Good thing I was in agreement.

Later on, he started talking about comments we’ve been getting on our posts. He says I should answer them. I do appreciate them. I just don’t know what to say. Here’s a suggestion to try XYZ. Wow. That doesn’t sound like me at all. Maybe I could do X, but Y and Z are not appealing. The thought that crossed my mind is that Lion has people to talk to about what we do. They understand what he wants. They are gung-ho about it. Yes, yes. I put on a skin-tight catsuit and dig my stilettos into his scrotum for fun. That’s not me.

This morning, I was thinking I need something like AA or Al-Anon to talk to people. Hi, my name is Mrs. Lion and I spank my husband. I guess what it boils down to is that I feel like an outsider. Maybe even an imposter or a fraud. I do things to Lion but I wouldn’t consider myself one of “them”. Not that there’s anything wrong with “them”. Sometimes Lion says there’s something wrong with certain people he sees on TV. There was a group of people who throw parties for their pets. He thinks they’re weird. I usually point out that he’s in no position to call anyone else weird. I’m pretty sure the pet party people would think he’s weird for wanting to be spanked and have his orgasms controlled.

Sometimes I feel like I’m in limbo. I’m somewhere between normal and weird. But who decides what’s normal and what’s weird? You certainly can’t ask the normals or weirdos. They’ll say they’re normal and everyone else is weird. [Lion — We’re normal, of course. Those dog party people are weird! What we do hurts no one but me. It supports our marriage. Above all, it shows how much you love me. I don’t know how much it caught on, but the DWC was a kind of spanking support group. One of the things that make stuff like that fail is that most of the people who want to join are guys who want to be spanked instead of women wanting support and technique tips.]