By:
In: Mrs Lion Comments, Punishment
lion being spanked
Lion’s spanked but modeling my whomping stick.
(Click image to view larger)

Lion was too tired to go shopping this weekend. We’re going to try to do it tonight. I’m hoping not too many people want to be in Costco on a weeknight so it will go smoothly. Then we need to hit the grocery store so we can buy one or two onions instead of a 25 pound bag. Plus Lion has some prescriptions. Somewhere along the line we have to eat dinner and he’s already reminding me I need to start his punishment. If he could have just remembered punishment day on Saturday, he wouldn’t need punishment tonight.

Lion said his patented “poor me” when I assured him I would swat him tonight. I responded, “So sad.” with a wink. He gets no sympathy from me. He needs to follow the rules. I may not be kicking his ass, but I am whomping it. And it’s his own fault. One, because it was his idea to have me make rules for him. Two, because it was his idea to have me punish him for not following those rules. Three, because he breaks the damn rules. Four, because it adds more for me to do which is going to annoy me to the extent that I’ll hit harder or add days or mouth soaping or combinations of those.

He keeps encouraging me to add more rules and more variety in punishments. I just thought of an evil punishment. Maybe I should make him eat a peanut butter sandwich while I eat steak or some other thing he likes. Or cereal. It just has to be something not as appealing as whatever I’m eating. I’m not talking about making him eat something he would never eat. I always joke that I’ll make him eat a raisin as punishment. I wouldn’t go that far. The punishment has to make him realize he did something wrong and these are the consequences. That’s all. I don’t want to be vindictive.

I’m a nice meanie.

[Lion — I don’t think that would be an effective punishment. I don’t care that much about what I eat. I am happy that Mrs. Lion is approaching discipline seriously. At least I’m glad now. Later, I’ll be sorry. I know that. She’ll both hit harder and longer and repeat the punishment over more days. After all, this was the second week in a row I forgot to remind her that Saturday was punishment day.]

By:
In: Anal play
hairless arm pits and nipples
Here I am, freshly waxed. I don’t think my hairless pits and nipples look effeminate.

While I think I will always be concerned about people discovering that I wear a male chastity device, I’m no longer self-conscious about shedding my body hair. Apparently, the world has become much more tolerant of male body grooming. There are quite a few products aimed at helping guys remove hair.

I have an obvious interest in the subject since I have been removing body hair for many years. If you’re wondering what this has to do with enforced male chastity, let me explain. Male chastity represents a significant deviation from the stereotypical view of the male. We are supposed to be sexually aggressive and in control of sexual situations. While we are expected to be considerate and obtain permission to mount a female, we are to be the initiators. Women have the absolute right to say no, but they aren’t expected to initiate sexual activity.

Obviously, if a woman locks her partner’s penis in a chastity device and keeps the key, she has the exclusive right to initiate or withhold sex. This is not the norm, but the practice is clearly gaining popularity. Even without the hardware, it appears that initiating sex has become more democratic. While it may not be encouraged, female initiation is certainly acceptable.

In the 70s and 80s, this wasn’t the case. Traditional, male-dominant mating behavior was the overwhelming practice. Also, men didn’t remove or trim body hair. Sure, there were exceptions, me being one of them, but modified body hair was rare enough to draw disapproving stares when encountered.

There was a general sense that male grooming, particularly removal of body hair was effeminate. After all, women removed body hair to make themselves more appealing to men. Since women were expected to accept men au naturel, any mail attempt at grooming couldn’t be intended to appeal to women.

As women’s liberation extended to more and more people, I think that women began to feel free to express preferences regarding male grooming. For the record, the first woman I bottomed to, tied me down and shaved my pubic hair telling me she really didn’t like hairy men. She also shaved my underarms. I found that scandalous.

She didn’t attempt to rationalize her actions. Later, much later, she said that men didn’t like women with hairy pits and pubes, why shouldn’t women have a similar preference? Mrs. Lion has made it clear that she has no preference in terms of my personal grooming. I’ve learned to prefer myself hair free. In fairness to her, she is neutral on the subject of me wearing a chastity device. That doesn’t mean she has no strong feelings about me and sex. Just that she doesn’t care whether I use a mechanical device to prevent masturbation or just use willpower to prevent it. She understands I find wearing a chastity device exciting and is happy to indulge my kink.

That doesn’t mean she doesn’t care. Since I’ve expressed my desire to be locked in a chastity device, she will enforce my choice. From the very start she made it clear that if I say I want to be locked up, I will be locked up and I don’t get to change my mind.

Due to the recent health issues I’ve had, I’ve been allowed to be wild. Mrs. Lion has not required me to wear my device. We haven’t had that “talk” yet where she will resume the hard line requiring 24/7 device wearing. I have the feeling that the time has come for that.

I do enjoy times when I’m allowed to be wild. During those times I can have erections. Obviously, when locked up, erections are impossible. On Saturday night Mrs. Lion unlocked me and attempted to edge me. I had no luck getting particularly excited. I don’t understand why this happened. I wonder if it’s tied to the stricter chastity device regime. Since she is showing no sign of leaving my device off, we’ll see if my ability to get to the edge returns even though I’m caged.

Meanwhile, she’s removed all of my body hair, other than my arms. She waxes me. There is a very nice side effect to being waxed. The hair grows back is finer and sparser. Even though it’s been several months since she’s waxed my chest and legs, they don’t look nearly as hairy as they did before she began waxing me.

Waxing is difficult for her. I really appreciate her efforts to keep me bare. I’ve grown to really enjoy the hairless look. I don’t think I can be mistaken for a female just because my body hair is gone. Thankfully, in 2019 most guys wouldn’t be overly disturbed in the presence of a hairless lion. I imagine that most women rather like the look.

Male submission, on the other hand, is not widely considered acceptable. Apparently social norms change more slowly than fashion. Even well established dominant women are careful about being too overt in front of the general public. Both within and outside of the BDSM community, female-dominant behavior is considered kinky.

There have been some inroads. It’s no longer considered strange if a woman picks up the check in a restaurant. 20 years ago such behavior would have drawn unfavorable attention. Popular women’s magazines feature articles on female-dominant activities like pegging and spanking. Yes, they are discussed in terms of being bedroom games, but that doesn’t matter. The general public is being educated on how to do very dominant things to men.

I’ve often referred to the fact that study after study reveals that more than 80% of both men and women fantasize about spanking and being spanked. Articles about spanking appear regularly in mainstream magazines. Look at how popular “50 Shades of Gray” has been. That story featured a male-dominant theme. However, it treated sensation play and BDSM in general as something central to the theme. The public ate it up.

It’s not surprising that those of us who practice male chastity often adopt other power-related activities. Female sexual dominance has definitely entered the mainstream. Wearing a chastity device may be a fringe, kinky practice. But spanking, pegging, and taking the sexual initiative is definitely a mainstream female practice. We live in marvelous times!

By:
In: Body Waxing, Mrs Lion Comments, Punishment
hairless and hairy legs
Lion’s left leg is hairless and the right is hairy. Right now, I prefer the hairy leg.

I set out to wax Lion yesterday. I decided, since he’s been hairless above the waist longer than below, I’d start at the top and work my way down. I was fine doing his chest. By the time I got to his legs, my neck and back were hurting. I only managed to wax the front of his left leg. I told him he’d need to enter a room with his left leg first. Today I’ll finish his legs, back and shoulders.

As I was attempting to edge him last night, I noticed his legs. He does have fairly hairy legs, but I don’t notice it so much because it looks normal. His bare leg didn’t. I guess it’s all what you’re used to. Once both legs are waxed and I get used to seeing no hair, I guess it will look normal to me. I just don’t think I really like him with bare legs. This, of course, will go the same way the cage discussion went yesterday. He likes it and hopes I’ll keep doing it.

Actually, what I said about the cage was that he could do it so I didn’t have to jam him into it, but that got turned around to my not wanting him to wear it. I didn’t say that. I also didn’t say I prefer him hairless anywhere. I see the need for no hair where play or the cage is involved. It does tend to get caught up in things. If there was no necessity for hair removal, I can go either way. As far as other guys are concerned, I don’t think I’d mind if they were bare or natural. Of course, I’m not looking, but I assume however they were when I first saw them would be fine because I’d have no other frame of reference.

Lion forgot it was punishment day. Again. Apparently Mondays and Thursdays are ingrained in his mind but Saturday escapes him. And that was the point of adding it. Actually, he said he remembered it was punishment day but didn’t remember to tell me. Aha! I remembered it was punishment day and forgot once it became punishable at 8:30. What a pair!

Tonight, Lion will start round one of punishments for forgetting. I’m wondering how many days of swats he should get. He’s forgotten quite a few times now. It seems I should up the ante. But does that mean more days, harder swats, more swats, adding dessert or what? Yes. Not all, but some combination. Maybe one day he’ll get more swats. Another he could have a dessert added on. It all depend how evil I feel at the time.

By:
In: Female led relationship with discipline, Lion's Journal, Male Chastity
writing today's post
Writing today’s post.

I write a lot about how we implement and live with enforced male chastity and our Female Led Relationship with Discipline (FLRD). Early this morning I woke up and just couldn’t get back to sleep. For no good reason, I started thinking about how our lives may be different from other people’s.

I started thinking about this the other day when I was researching nudist colonies. I was really surprised to see that there was very little pubic hair. There’s no reason in the world I would see this under any other circumstance. Frankly, I was surprised. Actually, the fact that the women were hairless wasn’t all that shocking. Women have been  doing pubic grooming forever. Men are another story.

nudist gathering
Middle-aged nudists at a gathering in England. This picture was taken Spring 2019. Notice the almost complete absence of male pubic hair.
(Click image to view larger)

I’ve always been self-conscious about being naked in the presence of people who don’t share a lifestyle like ours. My understanding was that nudist camps and colonies, aside from the lack of clothing, are generally conservative, family-oriented places. I imagined a guy missing body hair would stand out and potentially be ostracized. Yet, in picture after picture almost every single man was absent pubic hair.

Here I was imagining myself to be an oddball, eccentric guy who, even at first glance, would be rejected by the naturist crowd. Clearly, I’m wrong. It’s true that I’ve long gotten over going on doctors’ appointments without any body hair. I’ve had several surgeries while furless.

That observation started me thinking about areas in our lives that are not likely to be generally accepted. I also realized Mrs. Lion and I have a very different sense of the normal and usual than most other couples.

Mrs. Lion noticed this on a recent visit to her family on the East Coast. She found herself a little surprised when members of her family began eating before her. For the last five years she has enforced a rule that I must wait for her to start before I can eat. Apparently, she’s internalized this so strongly that it’s jarring to her when she isn’t the first to eat at her table.

Our other rules are less likely to come up outside of our relationship. After all, I don’t think she expects anybody but me to always be naked at home. She may have a similar reaction to people eating before her when members of her party spill food on their clothing, but I doubt she has any impulse to spank them for doing it. Who knows, maybe she does. I’ll have to ask her.

She always says that she doesn’t care if I have fur or not. However, she’s never seen me with all of my pubic hair. Since she doesn’t make a habit of looking at nude males, I suspect seeing hairy balls would be a bit jarring to her. It is to me.

When I was researching male waxing, the instructional videos always start with guys who have pubic hair. My reaction to them was that I thought they looked completely unappealing. I expected to have that reaction; I’m heterosexual and don’t find male genitalia in the least arousing.

When the waxing commenced and the model’s pubic hair was gone, I thought he was rather nice looking. I still wasn’t attracted to it, but I liked the way he looked. Since I haven’t had any pubic hair in more than 20 years, I guess I’ve completely adopted the view that hairless male genitals is the norm.

All these hair examples are very obvious illustrations of how things that might be unusual to others, became commonplace to us. I know that I am more comfortable when I’m wearing a male chastity device. In the last six years a very large percentage of the time has been spent with my penis in a chastity cage.

A much more unusual area of our lives may be becoming ingrained as well. Our disciplinary relationship has been going on for about three years. For the three years before that, rules were in effect but I was not punished on a consistent basis. For the last three years if I spill food on my clothing or eat before Mrs. Lion I inevitably get spanked.

While she still hasn’t started, Mrs. Lion has promised to punish me if I interrupt her or annoy her in any way. The idea is, that she becomes very aware of my behavior as it affects her and that she corrects me when I act in a negative way. I wonder if once she starts this, she will begin reacting to other people’s annoying behaviors by feeling a little twinge that they deserve to be spanked.

IWe both have learned that consistent application of whatever practices we choose tends to make those things “normal” to us. It’s taken a long time, but spanking me is just a normal activity in our relationship. Unlike the fantasies and my initial idea about how it should work, Mrs. Lion doesn’t enjoy doing it, but does it because it’s part of her role as my wife.

Her amusing reactions to outsiders is proof-positive that she has fully internalized these behaviors. I’m really happy about that. I keep hoping and not-so-subtly nudging her to internalize punishing me for doing things she doesn’t like. She’s been conditioned to behave in an opposite way: accept and ignore annoying behaviors. Given how successful we are at adopting new things, I’m sure she will be able to do this consistently in the near future.

We make these changes by agreement. Our normal pattern is that I suggest something and Mrs. Lion agrees to try it. If it works for both of us, it is adopted as part of our daily lives. otherwise she drops it.

How in the world did those conservative, nudists adapt and accept removal of male pubic hair? Did some respected member of their camp show up one day with shaved balls? Did the other guys complement him on how nice he looked? I truly doubt it. Guys just don’t do that. So how did it become an international common practice in just a few years? I have no idea. It would be very interesting to find out.

I don’t know if other people who practice enforced male chastity or FLRD have had similar experiences with the practices becoming ingrained, routine parts of their relationships. I realize that for this to happen both partners have to wholeheartedly adopt them.

I’m tempted to believe that change, like loss of male pubic hair, can sneak up on people; even conservative nudists. If the general population is willing to accept, if not adopt, some new practice, eventually it will spread until it becomes the new norm.

Of course, naturism is a tiny subculture with a relatively small number of participants. Thanks to the Internet and image searches, more people outside of their group become aware of them. The same thing is true of enforced male chastity. As it has become easier to discover people like us, more and more people try chastity devices. It helps that the cost of getting a device has dropped dramatically and is affordable for someone who just wants to see what it’s like.

I wonder if removing pubic hair will become more commonplace in the male chastity community. It’s certainly more practical, since chastity devices tend to pull pubic hair. I wonder how many guys locked in chastity devices also end up being spanked. The practices are not related directly, but enforced male chastity does confer new power on the keyholder and it isn’t a huge stretch to extend that to cover punishment for undesired behavior.

I think it’s very cool that Mrs. Lion and I have fully assimilated what started as kinks into our day-to-day lives. It’s true that we both still actively work at perfecting what we do. I regularly encourage her to be stricter and she tries hard to remember to keep me caged. Given that I’m sitting here locked in a chastity device, stark naked writing this post suggests that we have made lots of progress. More importantly, we are both very happy with the changes.