By:
In: Lion's Journal, Male Chastity, Sex

Yesterday was a rainy, quiet day around here. Mrs. Lion took me down to our dungeon …er playroom and strapped me into the sling. She had been promising to do this and I think she felt a bit badly that it didn’t happen on Saturday. She put very heavy metal clothespins on my balls. I got those items a few years ago. I think they were designed to be desk accessories, but they are effective for CBT. The session didn’t go as well as we would have hoped. It was my fault. I just wasn’t feeling very horny or, for that matter, interested in sensation play.

In that ideal dommy/subby world, the bottom should always be ready for a good butt whipping, anal intrusion, or other sensation play. In the real world that just isn’t true. In my case, I think I need to be horny first. Sexual arousal is the precursor to wanting my ass whipped, pegging, or other play. If I’m not able to be turned on, I probably won’t be when the clothespins start biting my balls. I realize that this isn’t necessarily the same for others who bottom. But I believe the root of enforced chastity and other power exchange activities have a sexual base.

On Saturday night Mrs. Lion edged me. The last edging went a bit too far and I had a ruined orgasm. I didn’t drip semen, but I felt the unmistakable sensations of an oncoming orgasm. It could be that I was taken to the very edge of that sexual chasm but I didn’t fall; so close I was sure I was past the point of no return.  It’s true, as Mrs. Lion reported, that I did feel myself trying to have an erection yesterday morning. Later, in the sling, I got hard but I just didn’t feel the usual need to go further and further toward the orgasmic light.

It might have been due to the near miss on Saturday. Or, it could be my sexual rhythm at a low point. I just don’t know. Enforced chastity has focused both Mrs. Lion and I on my sexual state. We are in the third year of reporting and dissecting every sexual event we have. I am the object of intense sexual observation and introspection. A day like yesterday when I was just not in the mood seems to require in depth analysis. In a relationship where my sexuality remained in my control, losing interest for a day or two would mean nothing. In fact, my partner might consider it a sort of vacation from my usual horniness.

But in my current situation, a day when I was not sufficiently aroused by activities I am known to love, makes me wonder and worry about whether this loss of interest has a meaning beyond an unaroused Sunday afternoon. Mrs. Lion appears unruffled by my lack of interest. Is she just being kind? Have I caused her to question her ability to turn me on? Will this spoil future opportunities to take field trips to the playroom? Am I just overthinking a day when I just didn’t feel turned on?

I think this sort of self doubt is a byproduct of enforced chastity. Since my penis is locked up and I have extremely limited opportunities for sexual expression, I’m supposed to be at attention and ready any time the cage comes off. Yesterday it came off and I just wasn’t in the mood. Is this a byproduct of the ruined orgasm? I don’t know. But I want to encourage Mrs. Lion to find me ready, willing, and able whenever she wants me that way. I don’t want her to get the idea that I need less frequent stimulation. After all, doesn’t abstinence make the hard grow harder? I’m hoping that today is another day where I am back to my normal, horny self. I’m also hoping Mrs. Lion will unlock me to find out.

By:
In: Edging, Lion's Journal, Male Chastity, Sex

As she promised, Mrs. Lion unlocked me, led me down to our dungeon, and put me in the sling. I was getting hard just moving into position in the sling. Lioness 2.0 began by getting me very aroused, then she used a small butt plug, followed by a new dildo. She is working on getting me peg-ready so I can ride the fucking machine. The new dildo has the Vac-U-Lock fitting for the machine.  She said I did pretty well.

Then she applied quite a bit of the menthol rub in a wide stripe from the top of my balls all the way to my anus. It hurt, but not nearly as badly as I remember from years ago. I remember once getting a bit on my perineum and I wanted to rocket to the ceiling. She may be right and this old stuff has lost some of its potency; but not all. Later, when I showered, I soaped my balls and then back to my anus. A few seconds after soaping, I could feel the cool effect of the menthol. Note to self: wash carefully in the future when Mrs. Lion gets full-strength rub.

The entire time I had the rub on my balls, Mrs. Lion was either masturbating me or sucking my penis, or as she says, weenie. She edged me at least twice in the midst of my balls on fire. I know mammalian males are programmed to disregard pain during sex. I’m pretty sure that if she hadn’t stimulated me the burning would have been much worse. In fact, she paused stimulating me to apply more to my poor balls. As soon as she stopped masturbating me the pain went up a lot. That’s not to say it wasn’t very intense even with the stimulation, but just sayin’.

I can understand why some guys actually don’t want that eventual orgasm. For the last few days, every touch when Mrs. Lion unlocks me and stimulates me, has been heaven. It’s been a long time since I remember being masturbated feeling this good. Today is my scheduled orgasm day. I’m not sorry it’s finally arrived, but I have had a lot of extra fun without ejaculating for the last three days or so.

Since it can’t be due to my lioness trying some new, mysterious handjob technique, I have to attribute it to my heightened arousal. I think that three things are responsible for that: The first is that over the last week or so, Mrs. Lion has been writing and talking about doing things to me. She promised two kinds of clothespins on my balls as well as the menthol rub. I think the anticipation had a strong effect on my horniness. While she teased me last week, she reminded me of the things she planned to do. In addition, she wrote about Lioness 2.0 and how things were going to change. This turned me on bigtime! The second reason is that I had to wait longer than in the recent past. The longer wait also allowed more time for me to grow desperate. Third, Mrs. Lion has been much more consistent about punishment, locking me up immediately after teasing, and making it clear there will be no bonus orgasms for me.

Consistency, even when it means being frustrated, is more important to me than I thought. Mrs. Lion’s previous declarations that she could give me an orgasm any time I want always meant before my date. For some reason, those bonus orgasms were a bit disappointing for me. They felt wonderful and I truly loved the relief and great pleasure. But I also felt that I hadn’t made it to the end. I know it is illogical, but that’s what was going on. This is one reasons I asked Mrs. Lion to consider not telling me when I am going to come next, unless it is to tell me that today was the day, but now she will wait for a better time.

During a wait, very regular edging seems to do quite a bit for me. It not only makes me more horny, but it also settles me down for a while; sexually, that is. I can’t explain it well, but after I have been edged a few times (once doesn’t seem to do it for this) and I am safely locked away, I get a very settled, comfortable feeling. It’s similar to after good sex with an orgasm. It’s very different in that there is no loss of the urgency to finally ejaculate. But there is is a feeling of closeness and intimacy that prior to the edging, was masked by the need to get hard and get off.

Mrs. Lion likes to read my posts like lion tea leaves to divine what I “want”. Am I asking for very long waits? No, that’s not it. I am I asking for waits more than a week? Maybe. Am I asking to be locked up right after Mrs. Lion is done with my penis? Yes I am. Do I want more pain play? Well, yes, but I also love the buildup. Is any of this different from what we are doing now? No, I don’t think it is. I’m not asking my lioness to change. I guess I am just letting you and her know what is working well that she is doing. Mrs. Lion owns what happens to me. I am not trying to control or influence that.

By:
In: Female led relationship with discipline, Lion's Journal, Male Chastity, Punishment, Sex

2.0’s post yesterday is revealing just how things are changing in the lions’ den. Lioness 2.0 is much more action focused. She’s been writing about painting my toenails. They look horrid in colors. She’s right. I hate that. She wrote about frilly panties too a few days ago. That’s something else on my “yuck list”. Sadly, for me, we do have a few pairs from one of my horny, masochistic shopping sprees last year. I should stop writing and shopping when very horny, which I am today. So I am going to try to make this post suggestion-free.

A good deal of the folklore about enforced chastity talks about ownership. You know, whose penis is it? Who owns the chastity device. Many bloggers make this point by referencing the penis as “hers”. The same is true of the chastity device. Mrs. lion refers to my penis as “your weenie”, so ownership is apparently mine. The chastity device is also assigned to me. She tells me to “Put your ring on,” and “Now I’ll put your cage on.”

Do these possessive references mean anything? Some guys think they are very important. They say that if their keyholders own their penises they are surrendering more control. I don’t understand that. The vast majority of activity my penis does is to pee. Owning the appendage that directs urine doesn’t feel like a transfer of control. Owning any opportunity for sexual pleasure does. Also, referring to it as “your weenie” sends me a strong message. So far I haven’t been required to refer to it that way. If I had to, that would be a different, more-classic, BDSM form of control; the same as painting my nails or making me wear panties or diapers. It would also feel awkward to write about “her” penis instead of “my” penis. Too confusing for good writing.

What is most important to me is that she owns my sexuality. It’s hers and hers alone. She owns if and when I get out of my cage; and when I go back in. It’s my cage in the same sense that a prisoner lives in his cell. Enforced chastity,  FLR and domestic discipline are ours. We agreed to pursue them. They are mutually consensual. The fact that we do this stuff belongs to both of us. It’s clearly ours.

She, however, owns if and when I get sexual stimulation and orgasm. That’s all hers. She also owns my obedience and  good behavior. She demonstrates that ownership with domestic discipline, BDSM, and withholding sexual release. In a very real sense I belong to her. I’m still an independent critter who has his own life. But at any time she wishes, she can have me do anything she wishes whether I like it or not. It may be my penis, but she owns any sensations it might get to feel. I may be independent, but if she wants me to do something, or not do something, that’s what I will honor. If she isn’t pleased with me in any way, she will punish me. I don’t like her punishments.

So, my penis and chastity device are mine. My sexual pleasure is hers. I am obedient to her and effectively belong to her. And, enforced chastity, FLR, and domestic discipline are ours. Is your situation different? I’d love to know.

 

By:
In: Edging, Mrs Lion Comments, Sex, Shock Collar

Last night I unlocked Lion and tied his balls up tightly. When I said I was going to get some lube, he said the silicon lube is harder to clean up. Did that mean he wanted to use different lube? No, he said he was just thinking of me and how difficult it would be to get off my hands. The silicon is nice lube. It stays very slippery for a long time. I decided to use it.

As I was edging him I thought about giving him an orgasm and continuing to stroke him afterwards. I know he’s very sensitive after he comes. Too bad. I wanted to do an experiment. So on the next would-be edge I kept going. As soon as he came I kept stroking. He tried to wiggle out of the way and asked what I was doing. I said I still wanted to play with him. He said it hurt. Yup. I figured it did. He didn’t like it at all. Awww, poor boy. That was sort of the point.

Almost immediately after that he asked why I would give him an orgasm. He was worried he wouldn’t be horny for play today. Nothing about thanking me for his impromptu orgasm. (He did say it was the same as a ruined orgasm. Just as unsatisfying because it hurt.) I thought that was rude. But I told him I was sure he’d be horny again as soon as his butt was strapped in the sling. We’ll see if I’m right in a little while.

This morning, however, I decided to change tactics. Ordinarily Lion decides when we run our errands. This results in my waiting around for him or I’ll be in the middle of something when he wants to go. Not today. I told him I was starting the laundry and then the bus was leaving for Costco. It was up to him to be ready. As he dressed I told him to put on the shock collar. I wasn’t about to put up with any nonsense today.

I zapped him once for interrupting me, but other than that he was good. I told him I wished I could zap the other people who kept jumping in front of me. Too bad it doesn’t work that way. Lion did get a warning for interrupting again, but no more zaps. So far. We’re watching a football game we recorded while we were out. He’s making a lot of derogatory comments about the coach and the team. I think another zap might be coming soon.

Later on I’ll tell him when it’s time to play. It’s up to him to get himself downstairs. I won’t wait for him. When I tell him to jump, he should ask how high and when he can come back down. No more Mrs. Nice Lion.