By:
In: Health and safety, Rules

Lion came out of his office yesterday afternoon saying he felt very unsteady. He wobbled his way to the bed to rest for a while. He was concerned about not setting up the coffee pot. I told him not to worry about it. His feeling better is more important than the coffee pot. I’d be right near it while I made dinner. I could certainly do it. I thought he snoozed for a bit, but he said he just had his eyes closed. He seemed better by the time I was done with work. Not completely better, just not as bad. By dinner time, he was even better.

After dinner, he said he could set up the coffee pot if I wanted him to. I’d already done it. I give him a pass when he’s not feeling well. I’m not a monster. I don’t beat him when he’s already down. Obviously, this rule is not crucial to the survival of the species. Neither of us will die if it takes a few more minutes to set up the coffee pot in the morning. Lion doesn’t do, or not do, anything that really needs to be “fixed”. Even his rule not to interrupt isn’t a deal breaker for our marriage. It may annoy me, but I’m not going to leave him because he interrupts or acts like a know-it-all. These rules are in place to give me a reason to punish him.

I guess when you get along as well as we do, you have to set up silly rules if you want to practice domestic discipline. If he seriously annoyed me, I’d talk to him about it. I may follow it up with a spanking because that’s our arrangement, but we’d talk first. It takes a lot to seriously annoy me. I do like to point out when he’s being sort of a know-it-all. My daughter is going to be renting an apartment and when we looked at the floor plan, Lion wondered who would make the bedrooms so small. I don’t think it’s a bad apartment, especially for a first apartment, and given how many people have apartments that size for their whole lives. Then we looked at an old apartment he used to live in. The bedrooms were about the same size. He said that’s because the lot was so narrow and this had to be this way and that had to be that way. Uh-huh. Sure. And then he said her apartment is in a bad neighborhood as if that makes the bedroom size worse. Nope. Sorry, dude. That argument doesn’t fly with me. [Lion — We looked at a loft I owned in Greenwich Village. When I owned it, the bedrooms were quite large. Newer purchasers had renovated and created very small rooms.]

Anyway, Lion is feeling better and we’re off to a quick doctor’s appointment for him this afternoon. Then maybe we’ll make it to get our booster shots.

Maybe.

By:
In: Rules

That damn shower door got Lion again. I went in the bathroom before dinner and noticed it. He was upset with himself. However, his shoulder was hurting a lot, so I told him I’d let it go this time. If he forgets it again, especially if it’s tonight, I won’t be so nice. Of course, I forgot to lock him up again, so I’m no better at remembering things. My excuse is that we didn’t play at all because he didn’t feel like it even after his shoulder stopped hurting. He doesn’t get an excuse.

Both of us need to get our acts together. I can’t very well unlock him every other night if I never lock him. I also can’t let him off the hook for breaking rules. He has to be on his toes, so he doesn’t break any rules. I won’t always be as forgiving as I was last night. Well, let’s face it, I will be if he’s hurting. There’s really no reason to hit him while he’s down. I know he won’t fake pain just to get out of a different kind of pain. He needs the spanking too much.

I think he just put the coffee pot together. Now he just needs to remember the shower door. I tend to close it right after I get out since I’m already holding the handle from opening the door. I also try to make it a point to look at it before I leave, to make sure it’s closed. The dog gets wet enough going out in the rain. I don’t need her getting wet in the shower. Lion also used to turn the shower on, then go to put his slippers away, letting the water warm up. Ever since the dog ran in and got drenched, he’s been closing the door right after he turns the water on. Of course, the dog reminds him because she makes a bee line for the bathroom when she hears the water. He likes to tell her she’s too late. Maybe she needs to point out he forgot the door afterwards by slapping him with a wet paw.

By:
In: Punishment, Rules, Spanking

In his first-ever morning spanking, Lion got ten minutes (a little over) for two offenses. It was the dreaded open shower door. I planned to do it last night, but I wasn’t feeling well after dinner. I could have given him fifteen for breaking the rule twice, but I decided a morning spanking was enough of an assault on his poor derriere. Now he has to sit all day on sore buns.

Since my stomach was wonky, I didn’t unlock him either. I should have. Last night was the “every other” day. I did play with him the night before, but he was locked away. He got hard, but that doesn’t really count. The commitment is to unlock him every other day. I’ve changed that commitment to every day since he told me I’m addicted to my iPad and shouldn’t spend more than an hour on it a day. For the record, I made it four days without touching it. I would have done more, but he said, of course, he didn’t tell me I could only spend an hour a day on it. He meant less time. I should be like him and only use it to check things and when I’m done, I should put it down. But I digress.

He’s all up to date on his spankings. If he leaves the damn shower door open again, he’ll get the fifteen minutes he should have gotten today. The clock should reset after his spanking, but if he breaks another rule, let alone the same rule, within a certain length of time, he gets time added for bad behavior. He needs to learn the rules.

I suppose I would have been well within my “rights” to punish him for telling me I’m addicted to my iPad. Isn’t he addicted to television? From the time he wakes up until the time he goes to bed, the only time the TV is off is when he’s writing. He even has a TV in his office and the other day he said he likes to watch The Price is Right, but he doesn’t want to disturb me while I’m working. Of course, he watches TV when he’s in the bedroom while I’m working. And, yes, he sometimes gets annoyed with me when I talk to him while he’s watching a rerun for the umpteenth time. Yup, I see addiction. The difference is that I don’t expect him to stop doing it. I know he likes it. And I digressed again.

The point is, Lion is done with punishment for now. I’ll unlock him later and edge him. I may even give him another orgasm. Who knows? If he’s horny enough, why not? I have a goal of one orgasm per week. I never said there was a limit.

By:
In: Games, Rules, Spanking
Lion will be on the spanking bench for his post-game festivities

According to what I’ve read, the Rams will beat the Bengals. I have mixed feelings about this. In the 70s, I was a Rams fan. I thought it was stupid when they went to St. Louis, but now they’re back where they belong. The nostalgia in me wants them to win. The underdog in me wants the Bengals to win because it’s been such a long time since they’ve won a Super Bowl. It would have been much easier for me if the 49ers had beaten the Rams. I don’t really like the 49ers. Anyway, I think I’ll be rooting for the Rams.

That’s football. Who cares? We’re having our first-ever Spanker Bowl Sunday. Lion will get swats based on the combined score of the game and the number of sacks the Bengals get on the Rams quarterback. The score is predicted to be in the upper 20s to low 30s for each team. The poor Lion butt will get five swats for each point. He’s hoping for a low-scoring game. In the unlikely event, the score is 3-0 with no sacks, Lion will suffer through fifteen swats. That’s hardly worth dragging out the spanking bench. He could wind up with around 300 swats if the score goes as predicted. We haven’t discussed how many swats per sack, but it has to be more than five, right? I think I’ll do seven swats per sack. All swats will be delivered after the game. It makes more sense to do them all at once. Of course, it would save his buns a little if I did them after each score. He’d have time to recover. That’s no fun.

Lion suggested a new rule and clarified an old rule the other day. He said I never said anything about them. I did. I told him I liked the ideas. I did not, however, tell him if we’d be instituting them. My bad. (I hate that saying.) For the record, I will be spanking him if he does not put the coffee pot together by 5 pm, and I will be spanking him if he leaves the shower door open. In the spirit of fair play, I reminded him yesterday that he had 45 minutes before he’d be spanked for the coffee pot. He didn’t rush, but he did get the job done by 5.

Go Rams!