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In: Keyholder, Keyholder101, Mrs Lion Comments, Punishment

Lion had a fairly anticlimactic climax last night. I asked him if it was because he’s received two bonus orgasms within this waiting period. He said he thinks it’s stress. I can certainly understand that. We have stress coming out of our ears lately. I was wondering if withholding orgasms would add to his tension. To me, having that outlet would make sense. But then I was thinking that staying the course and doing what makes him happy (even if it doesn’t really give him pleasure in the traditional sense) is probably better.

Before we went to sleep last night, he asked if I was really going to make him wait twenty-one days for his next orgasm. I told him it could be worse. It could be a full month. I think I made him very nervous with yesterday’s announcement that I could punish him by eliminating a play session. Poor Lion. Yes, my pet, the wait time is twenty-one days. That will match his record wait of earlier in the summer. Now I get to set the rules.

The love coupons are in play. With Lion’s gift of a perpetual calendar, keeping track of days will be easier so adding or subtracting days should not be a problem anymore. If I do impose extra day(s), I will do so with a Naughty Lion coupon and I will decide how many days are added based on the infraction. He will be able to use his coupon to move up the date, but he needs to be careful. He has two coupons. I have an unlimited supply of Naughty Lion coupons. I would never add a day simply to counteract his coupon, but he does have a limited supply. He should choose wisely. If he uses one of his bonus orgasm coupons, the clock starts over. If I give him a bonus orgasm, the clock does not start over. In that respect he’s lucky I have an unlimited supply of coupons. He can use his wild Lion coupon any time, but if I see him doing something inappropriate while he’s wild I will punish him for it. What’s inappropriate? If I feel he’s touching himself too much especially if he’s hard, for example. Unfortunately for him, it’s at my discretion. I will play with Lion at least every other day, unless he earns a punishment. If any questions arise we will discuss them and I will decide what action to take.

Depending on how things go, Lion may be waiting a month anyway. We’ll see if he can earn days off as quickly and easily as he can earn added days. Poor thing. I can hear him grumbling already.

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In: Keyholder, Keyholder101, Lion's Journal, Punishment

Things are tightening up around the lion’s den. Mrs. Lion has also been thinking about an activity which I admit that I love to hate: spanking. When we got home from our long weekend, Mrs. Lion gave me the four hard swats called for in my Naughty Lion coupon. She used a hardwood (bloodwood) paddle with a very rough anti-skid tape applied to one side. I could feel every grain of that tape with each swat. THe next night she commented as she plugged my ass, that my cheeks were still rosy from my spanking.  She said she could see the markings from the non-skid tape.

I know that Mrs. Lion has wanted to provide more lasting sensation after a spanking. I admit that I would like that too. She has had very limited success marking me (bruising). In her defense, I have to say that over the years tops who spanked me have had similar complaints. I don’t mark easily. In her post  the other day, she wrote that she thought the heavy, wooden spoon would mark me. It should, but last time she used it, there were no lasting marks. Over the years I have learned that creating marks takes a special sort of swat. Many tops, including me, like to leave a “souvenir” or two on the bottoms we spank. Mrs. Lion does know exactly the right spot to swat me (green circles). She does that knowing full well I will feel it most there. I do and yelp each time she hits me. I think she likes my yelps.

When you go for a marking swat it is administered alone; that is, a long pause is taken both before and after administering it. One top warned me by saying, “I’m going to mark you now.” Markng requires an implement with a small surface area and a long enough handle to give good leverage. The large wooden spoon is a very good choice. The back of that spoon is fiendishly small. In the image of my butt (above),  you can see the the areas circled in red represent the prime locations for marks. Ideally, one per cheek will assure that the spanking will be remembered long after it is done. Within that sweet spot, lower and toward the crack is most tender and most memorable locations for bruises. Using the implement a very hard swat is required for the desired result.

I know that many couples don’t include spanking in their chastity lifestyle. We do because it is something that turns me on, at least before and after the fact. During the spanking I am always sorry I asked for it. Mrs. Lion has worked hard to overcome her feelings about “hurting” me. I am very grateful that she is so successful in providing this stimulation. While not every caged male will find spanking a useful part of the enforced chastity experience, it is something worth discussing and  potentially exploring. It certainly works for me.

 

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In: Advice for a new keyholder, Keyholder, Keyholder101, Lion's Journal, Male Control (training), Sex

Wednesday night Mrs. Lion unlocked me and did some very intense teasing. She brought me to the edge and then paused just long enough for me to come down a bit — maybe ten or fifteen seconds — and then resumed masturbating me to the edge again. She repeated this quite a few times. She didn’t push hard enough to risk a ruined orgasm, but made sure I was ready to come each time. It was very exciting. All week since my last orgasm I was feeling mellow and had no real urgency about coming again. Last night changed all that. Now I really want release. Of course I won’t get it until Saturday; well maybe Friday since that is our anniversary.

The technique Mrs. Lion used is very interesting. I have had some experience with it in the past. I know others who have also experienced it. Bringing a male to the edge of orgasm over and over with very short pauses between stimulation can, if done enough times, make it impossible for the male to orgasm. When it happened to me, at one point I just knew that no matter how much more stimulation I got, I would never come.

This is very useful to the top/keyholder. At that point the male is extremely aroused and hard and can safely be used for intercourse or any other sexual activity without the risk of unauthorized orgasm. As long as the stimulation continues, this condition will persist. In my college days when I tried pot, I discovered that smoking pot allowed me to get super aroused, but I was unable to orgasm. That is the main reason my pot experimentation ended quickly.

When you are done playing, a few hours of rest will restore his ability to orgasm. I’m sure the first question a keyholder will ask about this interesting phenomenon is how to know when the male has lost his ability to orgasm? The easiest way is to observe the male. While you are stimulating him he will start to look frustrated and you will not see the usual signs he is almost ready to come. Like edging, some practice and good observation skills will let you learn when he has been defused.

This is almost the ideal form of chastity sex play. The male is very aroused and no matter how much stimulation he gets, he can’t orgasm. The first time this was done to me, the top got me to this point and then told me that I could jerk off and come. I worked and worked at it until my cock was getting sore. I just couldn’t orgasm. If you do this with your male, once he experiences this, he will start reacting when he senses he is near the point where he can’t come. It’s massively frustrating.

I never suspected that my body would react this way. It’s like a circuit breaker in the brain is tripped. I always expected I would lose my erection and interest in sex if I lost my ability to orgasm, but that isn’t how it works. It didn’t hurt or feel bad, just wouldn’t build to ejaculation.

Like many advanced forms of play, this kind of edging takes time. It requires repeating edging until the circuit breaker trips. This can take a half hour or more. Persistence will pay off. It also may fail the first few times. It is likely that some ruined orgasms can result from over stimulation. Like any technique it requires a lot of practice.

Since this only happened to me once or twice, I have no idea if it is possible to train a male so that it becomes easier to get him into this orgasm-proof state. I wonder if this form of play is something that appeals to keyholders. I read an account by one who truly enjoyed her male in that state. I think that caged males will like this play. It is almost the ultimate form of chastity play. Let us know what you think and what you learn when you try it.

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In: Advice for a new keyholder, Advice to caged males, Keyholder101, Lion's Journal, Sex

Strictly speaking, anal play has no direct relationship to male chastity. However, when we open the Pandora’s box of caging our cocks, we also open other kinky topics as well. I have mixed feelings about anal play. I really like the idea of Mrs. Lion training me to take butt plugs, dildos, and her hand. It turns me on to think about her doing this to me. When we actually play, I rarely find it arousing and frequently uncomfortable. I think that is part of the appeal. It’s like spanking. I love to hate it. There is a silver lining. As I am better trained, the discomfort will become arousal, I think. For example, I now find the Njoy plug comfortable to accept and hold.

There are a few things I have learned about anal play that I would like to share. The first is for caged males. Anal play is not gay sex. Everyone, male and female, has a large number of nerve endings in the anal area. Stimulation of this area can be sexually arousing. Most men have experienced a finger up there while their partner was giving them oral sex. Once you get over the surprise, it really feels hot. So, keep an open mind.

Second, hygiene is very important. Your partner will probably not enjoy dealing with a smelly butt. Cleaning is easy. The anus is largely self cleaning. All you have to do is make sure the exterior areas are nice and  clean. There is no substitute for washing. Either a shower or a soapy washcloth in your crack will ensure your keyholder will have a good experience. The second issue is a bit delicate. The primary function of the anus and colon is excretion. That means there is a good chance some poop is being stored up there. Generally, poop is not down in the lower eight or ten inches of the colon, but it is possible some will be there. This creates two challenges: The first is that it hurts when an object is inserted and pushes poop back up. In my experience, most of my discomfort is caused by this. Second, when the toy comes out, there could be poop on the end of it. You and your keyholder need to be aware of this and provide a paper towel or something to put the toy on until you wash it. By the way, silicone toys can be boiled or run through the dishwasher for extra sanitation.

When Mrs. Lion and I started playing years ago, she began each session by administering a disposable enema to me. Disposables don’t put a lot of fluid up there and are not uncomfortable. Holding it for about fifteen minutes and then taking the time to let everything out eliminated mess on the toys and my discomfort from a toy hitting poop. You don’t have to do this. Just keep it in mind if you are finding insertions uncomfortable or messy.

The keys to comfortable insertion are lube and insertion speed. Most anal pain from toys is caused by lack of adequate lubrication. Use a good lube and plenty of it. We use Boy Butter. It’s inexpensive and long lasting. Use plenty. If during insertion, things get painful, withdraw the object and add more lube. Chances are very good that will cure the problem. Speed of insertion is also key. Slow and steady wins this race. If it starts to get too uncomfortable during insertion, back off a bit (remove an inch or so of the object) and hold it there. Then begin again. Don’t give up or stop. Just take your time. It is important to make it clear by your actions that your male will be anally trained.

What if he just can’t accept the object? If you are convinced he just can’t do it, you have two choices: You can remove the object and give him a rest. Let him know you will resume the next day. He needs to know that the object will be up his ass sooner or later. The second alternative is to remove the object and insert a smaller one if you have it.

The key to anal training, or any training for that matter, is to always reach your goal. If you want to peg your male and he agreed that you should, then nothing should prevent you from reaching that goal. It may take time because he needs to learn to accept objects and then learn to handle the fucking motion. That’s fine. What isn’t fine is abandoning your plan. A key to caged male happiness that is frequently overlooked is that your male needs consistency and the sure knowledge that if you say that he will learn or do something, that nothing will stop that from happening. That doesn’t mean you need to be abusive by forcing painful objects up his ass. It means that you will do whatever it takes to eventually reach your goal.

Being caged puts the male in a dependent position. Just as with a child or pet, the caged male needs to know that if you say something will happen, then it will. This knowledge, whether he knows it or not, will bring comfort and contentment.

Not every couple will want to embark on anal play. I’m glad that Mrs. Lion is training me.  Give it a try. You may like it too.