We have been a little under the weather for the past few days. I’ve been snoozing in the afternoon and evening. Mrs. Lion has also been less than bouncy. She is still working on unpacking. We probably have at least 80 cartons still awaiting her attention. I’ve also been revising my book. I decided to take another shot at getting an agent. Being a novelist has to be one of the most frustrating jobs in the world. Why the hell did I think I could write a book and get it published? Ego and stupidity!

It’s been a while since my last spanking. Mrs. Lion is having enough trouble working and dealing with thehouse without worrying about bruising my bottom. However, on one of her expeditions into the boxes she is unpacking, she unearthed the leather paddle I made many years ago. This particular paddle isn’t very pretty, but has the potential to bruise my bottom. I made it out of three layers of full-thickness cowhide. It is what I hoped the paddle from 6-Whips would be/ I have a feeling that when Mrs. Lion feels better, she will be using her discovery on me.

Earlier in the week we did an Edex injection and Mrs. Lion used her mouth to get me off. I just couldn’t get over the top. We were going to try again on Monday night, but neither of us were up to it. I’m hoping our energy is coming back enough for us to go for the gold tonight or tomorrow.

I still owe a review of the Mature Metal waist chain and micro chastity device. I’ve been experimenting with both. They represent a departure from my usual approach to male chastity. The base ring with waist chain solves two problems that some men have: It prevents pull-out regardless of how small the cage is and provides a strong sense of control by the man wearing it.  More when testing is complete.


Does size count? I hope not! There’s no getting around it; my penis is barely adequate. Some time ago Mrs. Lion made a silicone cast of my weenie. Looking at the disconnected likeness of my cock was a disappointing revelation. I’ve been handling it all my life. It felt just fine when pumped up. But my little six-inch weenie isn’t much in a world of eight-inch monsters. None of the women who have handled it laughed or commented on its size. The didn’t gasp or whisper, “Oh my God!” either.

I’ve never given size much thought. I’ve measured and have been measured when soft. That’s the only way to get a male chastity device that fits. My flaccid length is definitely on the short size, barely two inches. When hard, it grows to about six inches long and one-and-a-half inches in diameter. I’ve been told it looks cute. Cute? Sheesh!

My penis isn’t exactly a secret. Over five million people have seen it in various poses that range from soft and”cute” to hard with clothespins attached. I’ve only received one comment from a guy who said it looked cute and suckable. Only one comment in ten years and over five million views. I didn’t expect to have a fan club, but still…

What promted this painful memoir was a picture that popped into my Twitter feed. Holy shit! Is that what women want? I don’t have it if they do. No wonder Mrs. Lion lost interest in sex. She has a life sentence with my tiny dick. When I was locked in a male chastity device she didn’t have to deal with my low-rise erection. Maybe we should go back to locking me up.

double whammy

My sex life has become very difficult. The biggest issue is that I’m the only one in this marriage interested in sex. Mrs. Lion is done with sex for herself. She kindly gets me off. Sex is all one-way. Foreplay is limited to what Mrs. Lion wants to do to get me aroused. This has been going on for a very long time: nearly half of our marriage. She deserves a lot of credit for taking care of my needs. Let’s face it, sex isn’t something she wants; it’s a service she gives me. Foreplay is almost impossible. When both of us were interested in sex, our foreplay increased in intensity as we both got more and more aroused. That doesn’t happen now. I miss it.

My ability to get hard has also suffered. I need to get an injection of Edex in order to get a full erection. The process of preparing the solution and then injecting it into my penis is about as far from foreplay as you can get unless you are into medical scenes. To make matters worse, Edex is expensive so there os pressure to make every shot count.

Given all this, it’s amazing that there is any sex at all. Now that Mrs. Lion has discovered that hand jobs work again, she seems inclined to jerk me off as soon as the Edex gets me hard. I don’t want to seem ungrateful, but this is not what I want. A handjob is fun at the end of some BDSM, but just jerking me off as soon as I get hard feels impersonal and not much fun for me. I guess that from Mrs. Lion’s perspective, sex is just another chore she has to do before she can go play on her iPad. I’m grateful she takes the time to get me off.

I don’t know what we can do about this. I know that Mrs. Lion can have orgasms; she just doesn’t want them. I don’t understand that, but it’s how she feels. The problem is that activities like kissing and petting have also stopped when sex became one-way. I miss that, too. The only intimate activity we do that doesn’t involve directly stimulating my penis is spanking. I want to find more we can do.

Decisions, decisions! Sunday night, Mrs. Lion had to make a tough choice. I earned a spanking and was overdue. She knew that I was horny. As she wrote (“Inconsistency Is My Middle Name“), I wasn’t going to get a choice because she knew that if faced with either a spanking or a handjob, I would go for the sex. Well, duh!

She also went for the sex. Somehow, after burrowing through the still-packed cartons of our belongings, she found some soft CBT rope. She used it to tie and separate my balls. Then she went to work. Her hand was magic, and it wasn’t long before I had a large, nearly-dry orgasm. My semen production hasn’t been great in recent months. It felt very good anyway.

I’ve been keeping records of my orgasms since 2016. The first year I just noted the date. In 2017, I began recording how Mrs. Lion produced them. In case you haven’t heard, I haven’t masturbated since 2013. My lioness produces all of my orgasms. Since I had the record, I decided to find out exactly how often my orgasms were produced by hand and how often orally. I only had vaginal sex once in all that time, so it doesn’t show up in the graph (right) at all. I was surprised to see that over half were oral. My impression was very different.

I was sure that almost all of my releases were produced with her hand. I was both right and wrong. Until very recently, Mrs. Lion would edge me almost every day. At least ninety percent of the teasing was done with Mrs. Lion’s hand. If you factor in the teasing, her hand was nearly all of my sexual pleasure. When she decided to let me come, she used her mouth over half of the time.

That’s not entirely accurate. On a year-over-year basis, she used her hand al lot of the time in the early years. Her mouth came into play as I lost the ability to get off from her handjobs easily. She had to switch entirely to oral in the last couple of years. That changed the ratio of hand-vs-mouth. My last two orgasms were produced with her hand. I guess my ability to come that way has returned.

Now that she can use her hand again, Mrs. Lion has an easier time getting me off. I wonder if she will try edging me again. Since we started using Edex to get me hard, she’s all business once my erection arrives. It isn’t really necessary. My boner lasts at least an hour, so there is time for teasing and CBT. We’ve accumulated a surplus of Edex since we only use it when Mrs. Lion wants to get me off. Maybe it’s time to start teasing again.

hand job closeup
Yes, that’s really us.

When we had dinner on Saturday night and I still been unspanked, I figured I had another day’s reprieve. Nope, I didn’t. A little while after we ate she got the spanking bench ready and handed me my waist restraint. I groaned. I wasn’t in the mood for a spanking. OK, you’re right, I’m never in the mood to get spanked. Of course it didn’t matter. Mrs. Lion strapped me down and went to work.

Some spankings feel worse than others. This one was particularly painful. I’m not sure why since Mrs. Lion was using her usual leather paddle, but it was. I was miserable almost from the very start. She ended it a little before the ten minutes were up. I’m glad. I had enough. There was very little damage to my butt. It was a bit leathery in two spots (one spot on each cheek), but that’s all. I probably won’t be so lucky next time.

Mrs. Lion said that she was going to jerk me off today (Sunday). That may not seem like a big event to you, but it is for me. Over ten years ago, Mrs. Lion forbade masturbation. I haven’t jerked off since. I am totally dependent on her for sexual release.

It’s been a very long time since she’s gotten me off by hand. My last handjob was in January of 2023. Every orgasm since then has been oral. I love oral sex, both getting and giving. I haven’t given Mrs. Lion an orgasm in over two years. She’s lost interest.

Over most of the last decade, my orgasms have been produced with her hand. In between orgasms, she used her hand to edge me on a nearly daily basis. At one point, I stopped responding and couldn’t orgasm, no matter how hard she worked with her hand. That’s when she switched to using her mouth for both orgasms and teasing.

Mrs. Lion likes to suck my cock. She really likes the taste of semen. Yuck! I don’t. How do I know? she occasionally feeds my semen to me. She makes me lick it off her fingers. The longer I try to stall, the worse the taste gets as it ages. I try to remember that and promptly consume it when offered. Lately, I’ve produced little-to-no semen. If I make some today, I wonder in whose mouth it will end up.