By:
In: Mrs Lion Comments

We started out with a bit of good news yesterday. Lion was feeling better. Just after lunch, however, it was clear he wasn’t. My stomach was acting up too. What the heck are we eating that’s doing us in? Lion didn’t eat much dinner. He was still feeling sick. I was better. I don’t know if it ever helps but when my guts are annoyed, I hit them with hot sauce, if it’s called for in a recipe. I figure if it’s pissed off, then I’m pissed off and I’m fighting fire with fire. Literally. Anyway, I felt better, but Lion did not.

As you can imagine, it’s very difficult to have sexy time if you’re not feeling well. He was also sleeping a lot. He kept apologizing for ignoring me. I didn’t think he was ignoring me. I thought he needed sleep and that it might help him feel better. Eventually, he took the medication the doctor had prescribed. He was avoiding it because of possible side effects. It may have helped. He ate a banana and that didn’t attack.

So far so good this morning, but we’ve heard that tune before. I’m cautiously optimistic. It’s been a few hours since we ate breakfast. Lion’s been snoozing. He hasn’t mentioned feeling sick. I’m sure he’s nervous about eating lunch.

Of course, my main function during all this is to take care of Lion. I wish there was more I could do. I run for drinks and whatever else he needs, but I’m helpless otherwise. I know it’s frustrating to be sick, but it’s also frustrating not to be able to help more. Maybe he should try my hot sauce therapy. It may act like Drano and just wipe out whatever is in the way. I had an ulcer many years ago and I never wanted spicy food more than when I was told I couldn’t have it. Perhaps that’s where my hot sauce theory comes from. Hair of the dog, so to speak.

I’m still planning on playing with Lion whenever he feels up to it. Tied up balls and oral sex can be had for the low, low price of a healthy Lion. That seems like a fair trade to me. I can’t wait.

By:
In: Lion's Journal

According to many single women who write blogs, men are motivated by sex. They claim that the bottom line is that we want to get our penises stimulated and ejaculate. On the other hand, women who write this claim that they look for emotional and intellectual compatibility as well as the right body type and age. Then, they usually go on to say that they prefer much younger men who are slim and well muscled.

Interesting.

The women I am talking about identify as dominant. It seems that one of the key requirements a submissive man has to have is youth. I get the body type stuff. When we’re being shallow we all like to say we want the perfect opposite sex body. In some cases, like those bloggers, these physical characteristics are paramount. It doesn’t matter what else is on the man’s resume. If he doesn’t have a sixpack and is over 30, he is disqualified.

Consider the odds: Based on what I can glean, about 20% of the male population is over 20 and under 35. Of them, less than one third have the kind of body these women desire. That means that the available pool of males is way under 5% of the guys they might meet. If you consider that most are already married, and some are gay, we are probably down to less than 1%. Now, let’s add in men who self-identify as submissive. I think you would agree that less than 10% of the men are identifying themselves that way. That means that we are down to one in every thousand or so men being available and meeting the criteria specified.

Let’s consider the other side. Guys who are submissive by nature and want a relationship with a dominant female have a similarly difficult probability of success. From what I’ve observed and read, men are less obsessed with the appearance of their partners. Guys who want to submit are willing to accept dominant women of any shape or age. I’ve observed this over 30 years of active involvement in the real-life BDSM scene. Male requirements for a dominant partner focus more on what she is willing to do to/with him. In his quest for a partner, he focuses on activities.

Before I met Mrs. Lion I understood all this very well. I also realized that what mattered most to me was a peaceful, happy, loving relationship. I resolved to put aside all my BDSM prerequisites in my hunt for a partner. I correctly figured that the odds of meeting someone who would meet all my needs and BDSM were very, very small. So, my quest was vanilla in nature.

I had more evidence to support my idea. Over the years in the scene, I’ve met quite a few very happy couples. Some were female-dominant and some were male-dominant. The one thing they had in common was that they met, fell in love, and married before BDSM entered into the picture. They had a loving relationship and then the kinky stuff came in.

I imagined that none of these people consciously plotted to entrap a partner and then pull them into a web of kink. That would be silly. I reasoned that if they were kinky to begin with, they realized that it was far more important to find love than a good spanker. I decided that I could get through the rest of my life quite happily if I had my soulmate by my side. If she didn’t want to tie me up and spank my butt, it didn’t matter.

I spent a lot of time thinking about this. I realized that I was about to make a major sacrifice. I decided it was the right thing to do. I went searching online through various dating sites. On one of them, the picture of a  wonderful smile instantly captured me. She had beautiful eyes and a smile that spoke to my soul. Her description of herself was brief and honest. I needed to meet her. We exchanged emails. They were pretty shallow; we didn’t talk about deep, soul-revealing thoughts. We both wanted sex.

She never asked about my appearance and I never asked about hers. I really didn’t care. I loved that smile and I really wanted to get laid. She wanted the same thing. We met at a motel and had sex. The sex was great and the company even better. We continued meeting and screwing. We got to know each other better and better. That one point I told her that I’d like to get spanked. She seemed unimpressed with that idea but agreed to give it a try. I barely felt her swats. They were little love taps. It didn’t matter. In my mind, if she never got any more vicious than this I would be happy.

I realized that I wanted her with me. She felt the same way. She also figured out something I didn’t know at the time. She understood that I really did need BDSM. And she felt that she could manage to do what I wanted. I, on the other hand, decided it didn’t matter much. I just wanted to be with her.

That’s how it started. Now, 17 years later we are a very happy, kinky couple. I discovered my secret for successful dating.

By:
In: Health and safety, Mrs Lion Comments, Oral Sex

I finished mowing the lawn this morning. It was 72 by 10 am. An hour later, it’s 75. I’m sweating and recovering while I write this. We’re supposed to hit 82 today. I’m glad I got the lawn done early.

Last night, Lion didn’t take his blood pressure medication. We’re experimenting to see if his lack of erection stamina is linked to low blood pressure. He already takes boner pills to counteract his medication but maybe the BP meds are doing too good a job. This morning, Lion reports that he thinks he’s horny. Of course, he said he was horny the other day and it didn’t amount to an erection at all.

Lion also reports that his stomach issues seem to be getting better. I think going to the doctor scared the illness enough to get out of town. We’ll see how he feels later. We’ll see how I feel later too. I’m wiped out from mowing the lawn but I should be okay. It’s nothing some hydration and a shower can’t fix.

I think, just to help matters along, I’ll pull out my handy dandy rope and tie Lion’s balls. That usually gets his motor running. And it should go without saying that I’ll give him some oral attention. He’ll have every advantage toward getting and keeping a woody. I have no idea how long it’s been since his last orgasm. [Lion — 15 days today] We were going pretty good for a few days and I was contemplating giving him an orgasm the first day he waned. Now I wonder if I have to reset the game clock to build up the frustration all over again. I still maintain he can’t be frustrated the entire time he’s not horny. I concede the days still count but they don’t count as horny days.

When Lion can’t get hard, I tease him that I’m not enough for him. I don’t really think that’s true, but after a while I do start to wonder. I know I’m not enough when he’s not feeling well. No one is. My weenie has a hard time overriding the rest of his body then. The rest of the time, he can think with his penis.

I’m really hoping he’s horny enough to make it to the edge tonight. I can’t contemplate whether or not to give him an orgasm if he can’t get that far. Come on, Lion. My weenie, my mouth, what do you say?

By:
In: Lion's Journal, Male Chastity

I think that the reason it’s often difficult to convince someone to do kinky stuff with you is that they don’t understand the real reason you want it. Let me explain. One of the more difficult conversations a guy can have is when he asks his partner to lock him into a chastity device. Obviously, that’s a pretty odd request. A logical question he might get is “why?”

This is where the fun begins. After some stammering, he might explain that by locking him up she would get much more attention from him. He would be focused on getting her off and not himself. He might point out that being locked up prevents him from getting sexual pleasure until she unlocks him. That makes her boss of his penis.

It isn’t too surprising that most women aren’t ecstatic when they hear this. I don’t think it’s likely that they fantasize about physically owning a man’s genitalia. What do you want for Christmas, dear? I want to own a penis! Not too likely. Being a male, I like owning a penis. Well, more accurately, I like someone else enjoying it.

The simple truth is that all the blather about delivering more female orgasms, doing the housework, etc., etc. are manifestations of a much more basic need. It’s exciting to imagine that someone is so interested in your sex life that she will actively take charge of your pleasure. I have thought long and hard about why I want this. Something deep down inside me gets extremely aroused at the thought of losing all control of my own sexual pleasure. That’s the real game underneath all that other stuff. Wearing a chastity device is physical proof that control has been surrendered.

Regardless of whether it goes on for a few hours or many years, that’s what the game is about. I wonder if it wouldn’t be far easier to sell if instead of talking about all the supposed benefits of taking over penis control, you simply said, “It’s really exciting for me to lose control of my sexual pleasure. I trust you, I love you and would like you to decide when I get to ejaculate.”

That’s the heart and soul of male chastity. The hardware is part of the game. It’s penis bondage. Once your partner understands sexual control, it’s not very hard to tell her about the fantasy you might have about wearing one of these devices.

It’s really an easy sell. Mrs. Lion felt fine about accommodating my rather odd desire for her to control my orgasms. She already knew I liked being tied up and immediately connected wearing a chastity device with my bondage fetish. We both understood the game was all about me. It had nothing to do with improving her sex life, getting a cleaner house, or anything else. It is something that turns me on. She loves me and didn’t see any problem accommodating this request.

The same is true of other fetish activities. If you like wearing women’s underwear and want your wife to dress you in them, the most reasonable way to approach it is to tell her it arouses you to do this. I am sometimes put in a pair of panties. Mrs. Lion knows I don’t particularly like women’s underwear; on me, that is. She knows that it’s humiliating and I like that feeling. Wearing a silly pair of panties under my jeans offers the remote-but-still-possible chance someone will see them. That would be humiliating. Oh boy!

I don’t claim that I’m wanting her to make me wear them because it makes her more powerful. The point here and everywhere else is that when it comes to power exchanges, it’s really important to think about them realistically. Sure, once the game is going, your partner may be very willing to act out the fantasy. She’s far more likely to do that if she understands the real motivation behind it.

As we’ve discovered, once a practice, in our situation male chastity and orgasm control, becomes embedded in the relationship, things change. They generally change in a positive way. If after doing some of these things for a while, your partner continues and is happy doing it, chances are very good it just will become part of your life. Orgasm control is something we no longer even think about. Mrs. Lion knows that she is the only source of sexual pleasure for me and she knows I like that. She enjoys frustrating me because I like her doing it.

The reasons are less important now. We just enjoy the activities. We both practice lifestyle male chastity. We both really like it. I don’t think we would’ve ever gotten started if I presented the fantasy instead of the naked truth about what I want.