Phase one of our experiment went very well. I suggested Lion numb his left cheek since that’s the one with the spot that gets sore quickly. I gave him only half of his birthday swats since I was hitting harder than normal. On the non-numb side, he was really feeling it. Not so much on the numb side. He said there was less of a sting on the numb side. He asked if I was hitting full force and when I said no he wanted extra swats on the numb side as hard as I could. Well, I don’t know if I quite did as hard as I could, but it was definitely harder. And I left a small mark toward the bottom of his cheek.

A few hours later, Lion reported there was no residual effect. However, this morning he said he was sore in the spot I’d left the mark. I doubt he’ll feel it the entire day or even for half his flight, but it was nice to know he could feel it. I think next time I’ll have him numb both cheeks so I can fire away. Then we’ll see if he feels it the next day.

As promised, Lion got his birthday orgasm. I didn’t really edge him as much as I planned. He was clearly ready so I just let him come after two or three times. This week he’s a wild Lion on his business trip. He may be able to make it through security with the cage on, but it just seems like a hassle. I think he ordered a nylon cage to test out. We’ll see how comfortable it is before I decide if he should wear it on future business trips.

I have no doubt Lion will be horny within a day or two but I’m not there to tease him, and he’ll be tired from work so it shouldn’t be a problem. As long as he’s horny when he gets home, we can resume our nightly edging with no further interruption.

This time he has a long wait. Long for Lion. Not really long for other caged males. If I don’t give him a bonus orgasm along the way I run the risk of him losing interest. Even with regular edging, he’ll reach a point that he won’t care if he’s edged or not. I don’t know if we can just power through that or not. I guess the only way to find out is to do it.

For most guys, penis size generally refers to their erection. In everyday life, there is very little need to know flaccid measurements. Well, there is no real need to know erect size either, but we guys like to contemplate that. When it comes to enforced chastity, flaccid size is critical. We have an entire information page on flaccid penis measuring (Getting A Good Fit). Most of us who are locked full time, have custom made devices that are hand made to our exact penis measurements.

Mrs. Lion wrote about my interest in a new chastity device and wondered why I wanted one. Partly, I wanted to give her a chance to select one based on what she finds visually appealing. I also wanted to look for a non-metal device that could go through airport security without setting off alarms. I also wanted to see if an off-the-shelf model would work for me.

We both Googled the subject. There were a few possibilities. One was the Holy Trainer. This device is generally liked. It is plastic (some material the makers claim is bio-sourced) and should be airport security safe. It comes in two sizes: regular and small. Other devices are also made in up to three sizes. I started comparing the specs to see if any would fit me.

I realized that there is no real standard for flaccid penis size. The people who make these devices have no real basis for sizing. They try to find the size(s) that will fit most guys. Since no one publishes sales figures, much less sales by size, they only have their own sales to indicate if they are even close.

They’re not alone. I have no clue what constitutes small, average, or large for soft cocks. I know there is a lot of variation. If there were a scale to size things to be worn on flaccid cocks, buying chastity devices would be much easier. It’s like bra sizes for women. There are multiple dimensions to consider when specifying. penis size.

The most obvious one is length. This would be calculated at the shortest length of the resting penis. Our cocks, even when soft, vary in length. Based on what I have learned, a chastity device should fit like a glove. The head of the penis should always be in contact with the front of the device. Ok, we know that we can compress a soft penis with no discomfort or problem. So our length component can probably be in 1/4-inch increments (6.5 mm). If we start our sizing at 1-inch (Don’t laugh. I’m 1 3/4 inches), then size 0 would be 1-inch, size 1- 1 1/4, etc. I’m a size 3.

The second component is flaccid diameter. Let’s measure at the base (the widest part). This dimension is also fairly forgiving. If a penis goes into a cage that is too narrow, skin tends to poke out wherever it can, but there is no discomfort or damage. If it’s too wide, the penis “swims” around and gets too much of a head start on an erection. That can cause discomfort.

So, width can probably be in 1/2-inch increments. Let’s give that letters: A is 1″, B is 1 1/2″, etc. My custom cage is 1 1/4″ in diameter. My measured width is about 1 1/2″. So, I could wear a size B. A size A would cause skin to bulge out. I know, because I have tested it. If we could get some sort of data on what size a lot of guys are, manufacturers of devices could size them appropriately.

Now that we have a sizing system, let’s take a look at how I fit into a couple of devices. Ok, first thing the CB6000S is 2 1/2″ long. On our scale the ideal length for that cage would be size 6. I’m a size 3; not looking good so far. There would be a gap of at least 1/2″ between the end of the cage and the tip of my penis. The inner diameter of the CB6000 is 1 3/8″. That’s close to B width. So, in our sizing system, the CB6000S will fit size 6-8 B. Easy peasy.

Let’s move on. The Holy Trainer Small is almost 2-inches inside the cage. If you add the thickness of the base ring and the gap between the cage and base ring, it’s about 2 1/2″ or a size 6, exactly the same as the CB6000S (we know they copied the measurements). The diameter is is 1.33 inches or a B. So, just the same as the CB6000, it fits cocks sized 6-8 B.

I am clearly too small for either of them. I need a size 2-3 B. There are some devices that are in that length range, but all of them are A’s (1-inch diameter); too small for me.

My limited (so far) research indicates that the CBx (2000,3000,6000), which was the first off-the-shelf male chastity device, sets the standard for the others who make male chastity devices. It makes sense. There are no standards for penis size. The CB-x folks created the market. So, the most likely path to good sales is to go after their market.

Plastic devices, in particular, used to be extremely expensive to set up for manufacture. An injection mold can run to $25,000 dollars or more. Risking that kind of money on a device the wrong size for most guys would be folly. However, now there are much cheaper ways to do this. For example a 3-d printer (less than $2000 at a warehouse store) can print any size cage/device. The software is cheap or free. Size can be changed with the click of the mouse. The printed device can be used to cheaply make a silicone mold. Liquid nylon or other plastic can be poured into the mold and the device can be cured in your kitchen oven at less than 400 degrees in an hour or two. That’s it.

If there is enough interest in enforced chastity to make this worthwhile, we will find these devices available at the same price or less as the CBx or Holy Trainer. I’m investigating one such source now. I’ll keep you posted and write a review if it all works out. No, I have no plans to manufacture or sell devices. I’m a consumer.

If you are so inclined, measure your soft (really soft) penis and calculate your size. Measure the length from your abdomen (top) of your penis to the tip. Measure the width at the base. Tell us your size in a comment. Maybe we can start understanding a bit more about how we are built.

 

I didn’t actually plan on today’s Lion swats being birthday swats. I knew it was his birthday. I knew it was his scheduled orgasm date; it was purposely scheduled for his birthday. I knew I was planning to do the first installment of the numb butt swat experiment today. But the thought didn’t cross my mind until this morning that those swats could be birthday swats. Duh! That means Lion will get mumblety-mumble hard swats right off the bat. Too bad he didn’t want to ease into things like I did. Oh, well. Live and learn.

I also suggested, as my father said when he reached a certain age, that Lion should begin counting backwards for birthdays. Lion wondered at what age you should start doing that. He reasoned that if you started too early, eventually you’d be in negative numbers. For example, if you start at 40 and live to be 82, you’ll be -2 when you die. I’d suggest picking an age, counting down to 21 and then back up. That way you’re legal to do whatever you want. Lion has just decided to get presents and cards and not add another year to his age.

I don’t know if I’ll actually give him all mumblety-mumble swats. We’ll see how it goes. His butt and my arm will decide that for us. Tomorrow he leaves for the hurricane-ravaged east coast. I’d like it if he felt the swats a little bit but I don’t want him to be uncomfortable for his flight. Being crammed into a metal tube is difficult enough without having your butt hurt.

I sent Lion a birthday e-card about a blow job. It was a grandmotherly type woman blowing bubbles with a pipe. Presumably talking to children, she asked if they wanted her to blow hard or soft. I figured it would make Lion laugh. He knows I’ll probably give him a blow job for his birthday orgasm. It’s one of our favorite things to do. I also tend to torture him more with my mouth. I want to make sure he’s really, really ready for an orgasm.

Given the past few nights of edging, I’d say Lion is indeed really, really ready for an orgasm. I’ve been getting him closer and closer and somehow still managing to stop just in time. I’m getting better at perfecting my craft. Happy birthday, my pet.

Most movies need a writer and director. Together they create and bring to life a story we can  enjoy on the big screen. We don’t generally think of our lives in those terms; life is something that just happens. Yes, we make plans that sometimes work or fail, but they are just plot elements in the movies of our lives. We can do things that will change our individual story; things like getting  more education, changing jobs, marriage, divorce, kids. They have profound effects on our film, but we can’t predict what those effects will be.

When we want to initiate a power exchange like enforced chastity, we can’t just decide to do it. It isn’t as easy as changing jobs or even having a baby. You can’t just decide to start and then experience the change. If it were that easy, all you would have to do is buy a chastity device and ask your partner to lock you up. The rest would just happen. It’s also true of a female led relationship. You can’t just say, “I’m in charge now,” or more accurately, “Sweetie, you’re the boss now.” That’s unlikely to succeed.

When I asked Mrs. Lion to lock me in a chastity device, I had much more in mind than just spending the rest of my life with my penis in a cage. I had written a mental story that included teasing, dramatic denial scenes, and many other plot details. The same was true of my request for us to have a female led relationship with domestic discipline. I visualized changes in our lives that featured Mrs. Lion as the dominant partner.

In movie terms, the male is the writer of the enforced chastity or female led relationship screenplay. The keyholder/disciplining wife is the director. If you were making a movie, you wouldn’t hire a director and then say, “Make me a movie about a bank robbery.” The results would be uncertain at best. Chances are that the director would refuse the job because there was no screenplay for her to direct. You can see where this metaphor is going. The dominant partner needs information before being able to make the movie you want to star in. But, as in movies, the director will not accept the screenwriter directing the actors.

In the BDSM world, dominant/submissive interactions are called scenes. This theatrical allusion isn’t accidental. The idea is that the top and bottom negotiate before starting. This negotiation is a conversation that leads to an outline of what they will do.

Full-time power exchanges like enforced chastity or female led relationships need the same sort of plot outline. I know what you’re thinking. This isn’t what I want at all. I want her to take control. I don’t want to be the invisible puppeteer pulling the strings. Of course not. But you are proposing something that is new to her. How does she discover what story she is being asked to direct?

Many guys point their partners to various websites and blogs like this one.  There’s a lot of information, good and bad, out there. But what’s missing is her motivation to do this research. Like it or not, you are the screenwriter in your submissive movie. In the beginning, at least, your partner needs a story line and plot twists to begin directing your film.

Hopefully, your script isn’t too detailed, but it has enough information to get her started. How do you know if you are on the right track? Well, in the movie business the director, producer, and writer view “dailies,” the material filmed each day. As they watch the product of the day’s work, they comment about how to improve or change things the next day.

You can do the same thing. Set a specific day (or two) and time each week to review what happened in your day-to-day filming. Each of you comments on what worked and what didn’t. This is the time for you, the screenwriter, to offer ideas to improve your film. Your director can ask you questions and, most importantly, let you know when she doesn’t need your help with that part of the plot.

Mrs. Lion and I frequently use our blog as a way to communicate this information. Check it out. There is a lot of communication about what we think works and what doesn’t. I provide ideas. She reacts to them. Very frequently we agree here on something we want to do or try. Just as frequently, we don’t actually do it for some time. The conversations are input for Mrs. Lion. While I like to assume that once she says she wants to try something, it will happen right away, it’s almost never what she has in mind.

As the production of the film continues, the writer remains involved. He usually has less and less input as the director takes ownership. I think that’s how enforced chastity and female led relationships work as well. My input is still accepted, but I have less and less impact on what actually happens to me. That’s show business.