By:
In: Lion's Journal, Male Chastity, Punishment, Spanking

Mrs. Lion is most definitely starting to grow into her lioness 3.0 skin. She has most definitely improved her punishment skills. My most recent spanking, actually five days of a spanking each day, was truly severe. I felt the results for more than four days afterward. In fact I’m still feeling one patch. I’m not complaining. This is exactly what I wanted to see happen. In my mind, a spanking is punishment-grade when I feel it for at least a day afterward. I can attest to the fact that it definitely hurt more than a day afterward. More importantly, she didn’t decrease intensity because she was spanking me several days in a row.

Lioness 3.0 still has a little work to do. Now that she’s mastered the spanking, she needs to develop her offense-observing skills. She’s a fantastic offense hunter, at least when it comes to spotting me getting food on my shirt and for eating before her. Her skills are a little bit in need of sharpening when it comes to identifying and punishing things I do that upset her. Bless her heart, he’s always ready to forgive me for doing any of those things. 3.0 is a more ferocious beast. She doesn’t forgive me when I interrupt her or speak thoughtlessly.

I know it’s going to be painful for me, but I really want her to get out her claws and correct me when I do something that upsets her. I’m not too worried that she will be a tyrant. That’s just not in her blood. I think she will be much happier, and I know I will be, when she doesn’t internalize things I do, and instead lets them out with her voice and her paddle. After all, it was my hope that our Female Led Relationship with Discipline (FLRD) would help her resolve this.

I realize that my uncaged days are drawing to a close. I’m not entirely sure what role the male chastity device plays in our power exchange. Of course, it’s a powerful symbol of Mrs. Lion’s sexual control. I’m not entirely sure that symbol is very needed at this point. I don’t need protection from myself in terms of masturbation. I’ve been wild for quite a while now and I haven’t had any serious temptation to ejaculate on my own. Could I if I wanted to? I like to think that I can’t, but that’s probably not true. I just don’t want to. As they like to say in the unions, it’s not my job. That belongs to Mrs. Lion. She is very possessive about my sex organs. She refers to them as “my weenie and balls”. It’s not just a joke. She means it.

Many of the people who come to our site are new to enforced male chastity or female led relationships. A couple like us, who have been at this for six years, might be confusing. It takes time and a lot of work to get to the point that most of the things that you fantasize about our just a normal part of life. It’s true of us. We are not going back. Our marriage will always have a paddle in it and I will never have sex on my own. We are an established couple, fairly set in our ways. It’s true that there will be new reasons I get punished and perhaps new rules and practices pertaining to sex. What won’t change is our exploration of this power exchange and Mrs. Lion’s authority. That is so well-established, neither of us even thinks about living any other way.

By:
In: Lion's Journal, Punishment, Spanking
wood chair in resaurant that hurt my spanked bottom
This is the kind of chair in the restaurant where we had dinner on Thursday. My spanked bottom hated sitting in it.

I hope you aren’t getting sick of our conversations about spanking. It’s been on my mind for some time. Mrs. Lion and I have crossed another boundary. Until early this week, the spankings I received, while painful, had no lasting effect. I’m not being critical of Mrs. Lion. She’s been evolving as a disciplinarian. For some reason, beginning with the series of four spankings I earned by forgetting punishment day, she’s dialed up the intensity and length of my punishments.

Apparently, the intensity was powerful enough to leave me with lasting discomfort. I think that’s important. Enduring a spanking definitely sends a message to me. Finding it uncomfortable to sit for a couple of days sends a much stronger message. It’s impossible for me to forget that I displeased her. When you combine a memorable spanking with three more, repeated once each succeeding day, the degree of discomfort grows.

That’s not surprising. What surprised me was how much I wanted to avoid each succeeding spanking. It’s hard to get in position to receive another spanking when it already hurts a lot just to sit down. Mrs. Lion was unsympathetic. All she said was that I only have x more to go and if I am good, eventually my bottom will stop hurting. How nice of her.

Thursday night we went out to dinner. It was the all-you-can-eat ribs night. I love baby back ribs! So, I ordered them. I should say that this restaurant has wooden chairs with no cushions. It was very uncomfortable to sit at the table. You would think that this discomfort would remind me that I shouldn’t order food that might drip on my shirt. Barbecue sauce has a way of going everywhere when I eat ribs.

Predictably, some sauce dripped on my shirt. I looked sadly at Mrs. Lion and I sighed. She looked at me sympathetically and said that I would only get one spanking for this offense. Thursday night I got the last of the four spankings ironed for forgetting punishment day. Mrs. Lion said it was too bad I had to get another spanking for spilling.

lion's spanked botoom after four days of a spanking a day
Mrs. Lion took this after Thursday’s spanking. It feels much worse than it looks.

Mrs. Lion spanked me as hard as she did on the first night, each night I received a spanking. Every time she hit a sore spot, I yowled loudly. She said nothing and continued as though I was silent. That fourth spanking was incredibly painful. She waited until I became a bit numb and then administered a few very hard swats. Maybe she was feeling sorry for me. It’s those hard swats, I think, that give her spankings their lasting effect.

While I’m really unhappy that it’s so painful to sit down, I am happy that Mrs. Lion has passed the point where I could consider a spanking something I wanted because I like being spanked, and has moved into the area of true discipline. She’s now spanking the way the infamous Disciplinary Wives Club advocated. This website offered women advice on administering real discipline to their husbands.

I confess that I have read that site and found it arousing. It turned me on because it showed women how to effectively control their husbands. I like that concept a lot. Thinking about it is very sexy. I imagined myself being disciplined by a member of that club. In fact, most of what was written there is essentially BDSM porn. However, the suggestions about spanking are accurate.

Now I am truly a disciplined husband. Mrs. Lion spanked me effectively. No, she isn’t being abusive. She is doing exactly what I need. In fact, I’m very sure that she will be adding more very hard swats to my spankings.

Our rather trivial rules are still in effect. Now that the punishment is so effective, perhaps Mrs. Lion will sentence me to less repeated spankings for trivial offenses. One of her current spankings is easily equal to three of the kind she gave prior to this week. That’s just my opinion; hers will probably be different.

Now that the discipline issue is settled, it’s time to talk about the reasons to give those fearful spankings. I’m referring to offenses that cause Mrs. Lion to be angry or hurt. We already have one rule that applies directly to her personal pleasure: She is to receive sex from me, with me initiating at least three times a week. We’ve agreed that those three days are Monday, Thursday, and Saturday. Other days are optional. Mrs. Lion can tell me that she isn’t interested on any of those nights. She’s agreed that she won’t do this unless there is a good reason. Right now, she is experiencing some vaginal pain and has suspended the first of the six nights we set up. The next one is tonight (Saturday). Hopefully, I will initiate successfully. I’m sure the penalty for failing to do this will be considerably more painful than the ones for the trivial offenses.

This isn’t so much about punishment. Though, punishments will be a feature of this at least in the beginning. The idea is that Mrs. Lion will learn to observe and then let me know (with her paddle) that I have done something that upsets her. Her pattern is to internalize these things. Her job is to learn to express her feelings at the time she feels them and to correct me in a way that’s meaningful.

Whether or not you agree with the use of corporal punishment inside our marriage, I hope you understand that we are building something that will give us lasting value. After all, that’s the really important objective.

By:
In: Sex, Female led relationship with discipline, Lion's Journal, Punishment, Spanking

This has become a time of major change. For several years we have been working toward perfecting our disciplinary relationship. That may seem odd, but the fact is it’s taken a long time for punishments to rise to the level that they become real deterrents. I imagine that most couples in a Female Led Relationship with Discipline (FLRD) go through a similar learning curve. Mrs. Lion had no experience at all in administering discipline to her partner.

Slowly but surely she has turned up the volume on my spankings. On Monday night she spanked me hard enough for me to feel it for the next two days. On Tuesday, when I got the second of four spankings I am owed, she did that again. I wrote that I thought she could increase her severity even further to make a real impression on me. On Wednesday night she did exactly that.

Wednesday’s spanking was quite different. Mrs. Lion has long understood how to build up intensity so that I’m not overwhelmed when she begins. It’s not that she’s particularly gentle with me, but she helps my body get a chance to get acclimatized to the beating. After that first volley of more gentle swats, she dials up intensity. At that point I am yelping loudly. In the past, this was the stage that concluded my spanking. It hurt a lot and did make a point. I felt that something was missing.

That sounds crazy, I know. But since Mrs. Lion and I have been building this disciplinary relationship in isolation, she’s needed my feedback. My reaction to those spankings was sorrow that I earned them, but no real fear of another one. I had no residual effects an hour after she finished.

From my reading (Julie’s blog), after I passed the next stage, which is more numbness to the spanking, much harder swats can be administered and it’s these that provide the lasting message. On Wednesday night for the first time, Mrs. Lion administered those extra-hard swats at the end of her spanking after I was fairly numb. They had the desired effect. It hurts to sit down, even lie down on the bed on my back. That’s the sign, at least to me, that I’ve been truly spanked. It also makes me dread the Thursday night spanking I am due.

The informal goal Mrs. Lion and I set for punishment was that I would feel the results of a spanking for a day or two after I received it. Also, I would truly hate being spanked as punishment. This is important for us because I’ve always liked the idea of being spanked, and I’ve received many play spankings. Punishment spanking had to be something I wouldn’t like. I don’t like my punishment spankings now.

I’ve had the chance to compare notes with another spanked man and he confirms that we are on the right track with punishment spankings. He suggested that Mrs. Lion continue to increase severity. This isn’t because Mrs. Lion needs to make things worse for me. It’s because it’s rather difficult to send a serious, disciplinary message to a grown man. I’m glad we are working on this. It’s just in time. Mrs. Lion has resolved to make spankable offenses out of things I do that annoy her.

The other significant change is the reinstatement of regular sex for Mrs. Lion. About a week ago she indicated a little interest in receiving oral sex. I pounced on that and gave her a nice orgasm. She reported that she enjoyed it. That doesn’t mean her libido has returned necessarily. It means that she can enjoy sex.

The problem that we’ve had for as long as we’ve been together is that I’m absolutely terrible at initiating sex. Mrs. Lion has learned to initiate sex for me as part of her orgasm control associated with my enforced male chastity. She’s never wanted me to reciprocate. We finally decided that I would initiate sex three times a week (Monday, Thursday, Saturday). How I do it is something we have to work on. I will be punished if I don’t attempt to initiate sex on those days. The exception is if Mrs. Lion is not interested on any given day. She’s agreed to be open as much as she can. Yesterday, she was feeling a little sore and gave me a pass on initiating. I will try again on Saturday.

If this seems artificial, I suppose it is. But for whatever reason, I’ve always had a terrible problem initiating sex. Ironically, I’ve never had a time in my life when I didn’t have a lot of sex. I can’t explain that. I know that one way or another, I’m going to provide Mrs. Lion with lots of fun sex. I think our new plan will do the trick. After all, my butt’s on the line.

By:
In: Female led relationship with discipline, Lion's Journal, Lioness 3.0, Spanking
spanking spoon paddle on lion's butt
The spoon-shaped paddle that Mrs. Lion used on Monday night.

Mrs. Lion likes to experiment. No, she doesn’t design elaborate ways to torture me, but she does like trying new things. On Monday night I got my first of four spankings sentenced because I forgot Saturday was punishment day. Instead of using the paddle she retrieved from our camper, she used the spoon -shaped paddle that has been one of her favorites.

Until she started using the camper paddle (a very vicious long-handled device modeled after a punishment paddle from colonial times), I thought the spoon-shaped paddle was the most painful in her collection. I was wrong.

The spoon-shaped paddle certainly hurt a lot. But it wasn’t as painful as the camper paddle. The spoon drew blood. However, I am not feeling any residual pain from bruises. Of course, there is no way to scientifically analyze whether or not the application of these paddles were equal. The results they got were very different.

I don’t think that we noticed these differences in the past because the intensity of my spankings wasn’t high enough to evoke comparable results.

hanson ferule paddle
This is the Hanson ferule paddle in bloodwood. Mrs. Lion calls this the “camper paddle”.
(Click image to view larger)

I imagine that Mrs. Lion will probably go back to the camper paddle. Actually, I think there are two of them in our collection. I believe we got one a couple of years ago and I had one from my earlier days when I was a top. That means she can have one of this model in the camper and another here at home.

From my reading I’ve learned that many disciplined husbands are given input as to the tools that are used to spank them. One I know of finds hairbrush spankings more meaningful and has managed to build a collection of them over the years. I guess I am more of a paddle man. I seem to acquire paddles on a regular basis.

Now that we are in a much more disciplinary phase where the spankings are intended to make a strong point, it makes sense for Mrs. Lion to use the most effective tools. There is no question that her camper paddle is the best to date. I think she might consider making that her exclusive tool for some time.

I have to admit that my camper paddle spanking has changed my view of punishment. I felt the results of that spanking for two days after I received it. While I was being spanked I genuinely regretted getting myself in this position. On Monday night I was definitely not in the mood for another spanking. The spoon-shaped paddle really hurt. I couldn’t wait until Mrs. Lion finished.

Her approach on Monday varied significantly from her usual. She made sure that she spread my cheeks and applied strong swats into the tender flesh she revealed. She also paid attention to my thighs. She was careful to make sure that I felt my punishment over every inch of my bottom. The spanking with the camper paddle wasn’t as thorough but it was certainly more painful.

I have mixed feelings about drawing blood. It’s fairly common I understand. I’m not sure why the spoon-shaped paddle drew so much blood and the camper paddle drew none. It wasn’t that the camper paddle was used more gently. I think it may have to do with the fact that the spoon-shaped paddle is heavier. I would think that the heavier paddle would bruise me more than the camper paddle. It absolutely didn’t. The camper paddle, even though it didn’t draw any blood, was much more painful during and after the spanking.

I’ve been on the other end of the paddle for decades. Mrs. Lion has been spanking me for at least 10 years. We never observed any of these issues in the past. I think that we are finally in the realm of a true disciplinary spanking. I don’t think Mrs. Lion is being unnecessarily cruel. I think she is finally reaching the point that she can send me a real disciplinary message.

Obviously, this isn’t important in the context of our relatively trivial rules. I’ve been successfully trained with the less intense spankings. But lioness 3.0 is in residence and she has promised to use discipline as a way of correcting me when I interrupt her or do other things that are thoughtless and hurtful. This is the goal of adopting our Female Led Relationship with Discipline.

It’s been a long, difficult road. We’ve both had to overcome inbred patterns of behavior. To some extent we are still struggling with those things. However, Mrs. Lion is close to the point of observing and then spanking me when I do things that upset her. Once she begins doing that, I think there will be a lot of positive change.

Those offenses are the reason she needed to learn to produce true disciplinary spankings. I think that she is well on her way to doing that. We also have established the multi-spanking discipline program.

This program has Mrs. Lion sentencing me to multiple spankings depending on the offense I’ve committed. We are doing this so that all spankings are the same. The spanking for a trivial offense is just as intense as one for a serious one. However, a serious offense will earn me a larger sentence of spankings. The spankings are administered each day until I’ve completed my sentence.

Currently, I’m sentenced to four spankings when I forgot punishment day. The reason I’m getting so many is that I’ve been consistently forgetting this. Our theory is that if being punished for an offense doesn’t stop me committing it, obviously I need a stronger punishment to get the message across. I believe this works well for us.

I know exactly what to expect. I know that each spanking will be a full-intensity disciplinary spanking. There are no more mild spankings in the Lions den. I’m learning painfully that I have to be much more careful about obeying my rules and my lioness.

This “lion system” of discipline is very effective. It works for Mrs. Lion because she doesn’t have to worry about modulating my punishments based on seriousness. She uses sentence length to express the degree of her displeasure. Believe me, by the third night of daily spanking I am very repentant for my sin.

I don’t know if this would work for anyone else. It seems to be doing the trick for us. Right now, our biggest challenge is getting Mrs. Lion to observe and punish things I do that upset her. I think she is so concerned about being fair that she disregards things I do because she may not have warned me or because she’s not sure she deserves to spank me because I’d said something to her. I’m sure this will get worked out soon.

Maybe we have to approach this the way we approached behavioral punishments in the beginning. Mrs. Lion established some simple, easy-to-break rules. To this day they represent all of the punishments I receive. Perhaps she needs to do the same thing with some of the negative behaviors I display. Perhaps she should choose relatively trivial things I do want a regular basis. She could make those rules and observe and punish offenses.

This is all just behavioral modification. It’s a training process for her as well as for me. I look forward to her making this next step. I think it will make her happier in the long run as well as training me to be a better lion.