By:
In: Spanking, Domestic discipline, Lion's Journal

I may be suffering from early dementia. For the life of me, I can’t seem to remember to remind Mrs. Lion that Saturday is one of our punishment days. I forgot again this week. On Sunday morning she reminded me that I will be getting a spanking for this. Of course, this is the inevitable consequence of forgetting. I’m not a happy camper about it. My version of Windows has a nice calendar feature. I’ve belatedly added Saturday punishment day to it. Hopefully, it will remind me in time to avoid a spanking next week.

I really have to get better at this stuff. I don’t like being punished. I suppose we will find out if punishment is really effective as a memory aid. I’m starting to doubt it. I absolutely forgot on Saturday. It wasn’t one of those fleeting oh-yeah-I-need-to-remember sorts of things. It simply didn’t occur to me until way past my 8:30 PM deadline. In fact, we were both in bed with the lights out when I suddenly remembered my omission. I must’ve muttered, “damn” under my breath. Mrs. Lion asked me what’s wrong. I told her. Her response was, “I guess you did.”

Even though we’ve been in our disciplinary relationship for about four years, I’ve only started taking punishment seriously fairly recently. It’s not that earlier spankings didn’t hurt. They did. It’s hard to explain, but they didn’t hurt the same way. Even though the last time she spanked me, Mrs. Lion did give me a bunch of milder warm-up swats, what followed was extremely painful. She didn’t even stop when I bled a little bit. I’m not complaining. Well, I may be whining a little. All I can say is that the last two times she has spanked me, I’ve thoroughly hated the experience.

In fact, I’ve hated it so much, that mid-spanking I was thinking I wanted to end domestic discipline. It was absolutely no fun. Even if I followed through I’m sure that Mrs. Lion would have simply laughed at me. This was truly not a get-your-cock-hard-when-you-think-about-it spanking. This was something I truly didn’t want to experience again. It may have taken me a while to figure it out, but real-life domestic discipline is absolutely no fun.

I recently read a female blogger’s domestic discipline “contract”. It boiled down — and it took a lot of boiling; it was very long — to the simple fact that her disciplining husband could punish her any way he wants, once. She had the right to veto further occurrences when they had a monthly, or was it weekly, “maintenance” meeting. At that time she had the contractual right to take his ability away to do whatever it is she didn’t like. Essentially, it boils down to only punish me the way I want to be punished.

It took us a long time to get past that. I’m not sure what flipped the switch, but Mrs. Lion must have decided to give me what I asked for. I had been saying that I wanted real punishments. I defined that as something I would absolutely dislike. Since spanking is her punishment of choice, that means the spanking should be so unpleasant I would actively avoid getting another.

Okay, Mrs. Lion, you’ve done it. On Sunday morning, she told me that I had a spanking coming. I was hoping she would overlook my little transgression. No such luck. Since this is at least the third time in as many weeks I’ve forgotten, I can expect even more pain than I suffered Friday night. Whether or not she bruises me isn’t important. She doesn’t need to leave marks to make me hate being punished.

By:
In: CBT

While I’m tempted, I’m not going to say I won the Battle of the Bruise. I am historically difficult to mark. Over decades of BDSM play, this has frustrated many tops. I’m also very difficult to color. According to Mrs. Lion’s post yesterday, “His Unbruised Butt: An Exercise In Futility” she has decided that when she punishes me, it will be what I feel while she is spanking me, not what I might feel the next day that matters.

Bruising during a spanking is a controversial subject. A bruise signals broken capillaries under the skin. It’s generally associated with deeper injuries. One of the reasons a paddle is preferred for spanking is because the forces are distributed over a fairly wide area. A cane, for example, focuses all of the force on a very small area of skin. It’s extremely likely to leave a lasting mark. The usual aftereffect of caning is stripes of red and black and blue on the butt. The skill of the person delivering those blows is often measured by how evenly spaced the stripes are and how parallel they are placed. It’s common for a top to make her bottom display his butt to friends to show off the quality of her work.

The quality of paddling is generally measured by how deep red the bottom becomes and how evenly distributed this red is across the spanked surface. Over the years, Mrs. Lion has attempted to photograph my bottom when she’s finished spanking me. So far, I barely looked pink. I’ve yet to see the deep red color. Maybe next time she disciplines me she can take a picture. Perhaps the color will show. I don’t dispute her description. It certainly feels deep red to me.

If her approach is now focused on making me thoroughly unhappy during the spanking, I imagine that means I can expect longer and harder sessions. Certainly, Friday night’s session was incredibly painful for me. I went from yelping to wailing. Mrs. Lion was clearly uninterested in what sounds I made. I did wriggle a bit more than I probably should. I couldn’t help it. I don’t want to have that experience again anytime soon. I know, as she says, that’s the point.

Something else seems to be happening. I’m down to the last card in the Box O’ Fun. It calls for Icy Hot on my balls. On Friday night, Mrs. Lion didn’t feel particularly inclined to do this. I wasn’t all that interested myself. I asked her if getting any sexual fun was connected to suffering through Icy Hot? She said it wasn’t. Nevertheless, for the second night in a row, there was no sexual contact. For the record, I didn’t mind. It’s only been a couple of days since my last orgasm and I wasn’t feeling particularly cheerful an hour after my beating. Still, I can’t help but wonder if there isn’t an unconscious connection: no penalty, no sex.

That wouldn’t necessarily be a bad thing. As we discussed in an earlier post, perhaps suffering through a penalty from the Box is the toll I have to pay for sexual attention. I wonder if that wasn’t in the back of my mind on Friday night. I suppose that means it’s time to grit my teeth and feel my balls roasting to earn some nice sexual attention. I am okay with that. Bring on the Icy Hot!

By:
In: Lion's Journal, Punishment, Spanking

I hope my memory isn’t going. I absolutely forgot to set up the coffee pot for Friday morning. I spent time in the kitchen and didn’t notice my error. You may think it’s a sort of thing I would do “on purpose”. I didn’t. What’s more, I know Mrs. Lion is going to make my spanking even more painful than the last one she did. That’s no joke.

Spanking in our house has reached the intensity of real punishment. There is absolutely no sexual component for me. Apparently, it still hasn’t proven particularly educational. I did two things that carry penalties. The first was that on Thursday morning I started eating breakfast before Mrs. Lion. That was completely accidental. I looked over at her and I could have sworn she had begun. My eyesight is poor. I honestly think that was the problem. She forgave me. Whew!

The second one really got away from me. When we go shopping I’m going to get a bottle of those memory vitamins. Maybe that will help. I wonder why I am having so much trouble remembering to set up the coffeepot. It may sound trivial, but trust me, the consequences of forgetting aren’t. I’m a little sorry I started this disciplinary relationship. No, actually I’m not. If we were a “normal” couple, Mrs. Lion would have set up the coffeepot and felt a little bit annoyed that I couldn’t even do such a small thing. Each time I forgot, her annoyance would increase. Eventually, it would come out in some sideways fashion. That would definitely be bad for our relationship.

The way we do things now, each and every time I forget she gets out her paddle and spanks me. If she didn’t increase the intensity of my spanking, she might begin to feel the same sort of annoyance she would have if we didn’t have punishments at all. The fact that she can escalate until she makes her point with me, takes care of any residual bad feelings. At least that’s how I have been thinking about it. I’m not sure she would agree.

I’m not looking forward to being told to get into position for punishment. I realize I deserve it and I will completely forget that while she is beating me. Her style is very different from my expectations when we started. For the most part, she is silent. If I squirm too much she gives me a very hard swat on the tender back of my thigh. If that doesn’t work, and sometimes it doesn’t, she repeats it. She is silent the entire time. She doesn’t let me know if I’ve extended my spanking by moving too much, she just keeps going. She’s done when she is done.

[Mrs. Lion — Are his ears connected to his buns? Once his buns are red, maybe he can’t hear me. I don’t say much, but I do tell him if he’s squirming or warn him that the swats may not hit where I’m aiming if his butt has moved. I’ve also asked him questions and he’s responded. Sometimes he’ll tell me “that’s enough” and I tell him I don’t think it is. How would he know when it’s enough? He’s on the wrong end of the paddle to make that determination.]

When we first began domestic discipline I was very involved with evaluating the effects of different paddles. I’ve completely lost that fascination. If she asks me, I will tell her if one was worse than others. I do comment on whether there are any lasting effects. There almost always aren’t. That I think has less to do with her intensity than it does with my physiology. A few times she has managed to make it painful to sit down for a couple of days after. I have to admit that those spankings focused me on correcting my problem far more than even the most intense it-only-hurts-while-I-get-it brand of spanking. I have no idea what to suggest to provide that more lasting reminder.

We’ve discovered that after something we’ve begun is consistently in place for a while, it becomes a permanent part of our marriage. Neither of us can imagine what it would be like if I were allowed to ejaculate anytime I want. It isn’t that we have a sense of horror about it; we don’t. It’s just unthinkable. It isn’t even unconscious. We both are very aware that we do this. We just have absolutely no desire to stop.

The same is true of our disciplinary relationship. When I had my spinal surgery and Mrs. Lion had to suspend my rules, while we didn’t talk about it, we both missed it. I don’t think either of us can articulate why. It certainly wasn’t because my behavior suddenly became intolerable. It also wasn’t because Mrs. Lion truly enjoys spanking me. For my part, while I do like spanking, I didn’t miss the beatings. I don’t know what I missed. All I know is that both felt something important was missing.

I think the same thing happens with other couples. Some start out with very elaborate domestic discipline “contracts”. After a time, they realize that they don’t need them. The actual agreement is very simple. The disciplinary spouse decides when the disciplined spouse requires correction. At that time, punishment is administered. There are no discussions about how the disciplined spouse wants to be punished. Nor are there discussions about what is or isn’t punishable behavior. It’s all very simple. In our house, Mrs. Lion decides when I need to be punished. She decides how she’s going to do it. She does it without consulting me on how I want to be punished. That’s how it works.

By:
In: Games, Lion's Journal, Spanking
shock collar under lion's balls
This is a dog training collar cut down to fit around my cock and balls.

Mrs. Lion invented a game she calls Zapardy. It’s played while we watch “Jeopardy” on TV. The way it usually works is that she has me strap on my shock collar (it goes around my balls). I answer questions when I think I know the answer. If I get them right, nothing happens. If I get one wrong, Mrs. Lion zaps me with the shock collar. It’s a distinctly unpleasant sensation. Under those rules, I can avoid getting a shock simply by staying silent. We discussed modifying the rules so that silence gets me a zap and wrong answers get me two.

We only played the game once this year. I managed to answer the questions I chose correctly and there was no zapping. That’s when I thought about changing to the system where I get penalized for being silent. This was about a month ago. We haven’t played since. I think the problem is that by the time Mrs. Lion decides it may be fun, the show is already started. The only potential solution for this is that I strap on the shock collar every night. Then all Mrs. Lion has to do is open the app on her phone to play.

The other day I was thinking about our NFL game. That’s the one where I get swats anytime a team scores. It’s easy to play that game because football doesn’t move very fast and there is plenty of time for Mrs. Lion to get the swats in. With Jeopardy, it would be very difficult. Questions come one right after the other. It occurred to me that if we had a hand counter, you know the clicker used to count people entering a store, Mrs. Lion could simply click it each time I earn a swat. Then after the show finished, she could administer all of them at the same time.

I suggested that I get one swat for being silent and two for being wrong. There are 60 questions in the game. Plus the final question. So, if I remain silent through the entire program, I would earn 61 swats. The total goes down or up from there depending on how good I am playing. If Mrs. Lion wants, she can add “interest” by making “Daily Doubles” more dangerous. She could make failing to answer one of those worth three swats and getting it wrong, six. If she wants to be particularly mean she can up the ante. She can assign two swats for silence and four for a wrong answer. That would make the end-of-show reckoning considerably more painful. Or, she could have a coin flip at the end of the game and if I don’t win the toss, she doubles the number of swats.

This game is a lot easier to play. She put the clicker on her nightstand, so all she has to do is pick it up and we are off and running. We both like spanking games once the inertia is overcome. It’s a way of inserting some non-punishment spanking into our lives. It is also fun because we both like quiz shows. What do you think, Mrs. Lion?