By:
In: Spanking

I crapped out on finishing the lawn yesterday. It was too hot. Yes, 82 is too hot. We’ve been in the Pacific Northwest too long. I’ve had the cold winters, and hot summers of New York assimilated out of me. I’m a wimp. I’m also older, so I welcome the more moderate climate. Anyway, twenty minutes of back and forth across the lawn, and it was done. I’d be happy, but I know it will probably need to be mowed next weekend too. The first mow of the year is generally a long cut. The grass sees it as a challenge and will shoot right up again.

I wasn’t necessarily too tired to do anything with Lion last night. Apparently, he was too tired, though. I tried to snuggle once, and he fell asleep. Later on, he asked if I wanted to snuggle. I moved over, and he fell asleep. I can take a hint. Maybe tonight, he will be able to stay awake long enough to play. Maybe he’s not ready to play yet. That’s fine. I want to snuggle without the snoring soundtrack in my ear. He’ll say he wasn’t snoring. He’s even tried to convince me he wasn’t sleeping while he was snoring. Unless he randomly makes snoring sounds while he’s awake, I’m pretty sure he was sleeping.

None of my remaining chores are as strenuous as mowing the lawn. I should be fully available to play with Lion, assuming he’s ready. I told him last week he needs a “just because” spanking. Maybe not tonight, but one of these days. I think it’s best when he doesn’t know a “just because” spanking is coming. He’s fully aware when he’s due a punishment spanking. He can brood over his impending doom. If I surprise him with a “just because” spanking, he has no time to fear it. Thinking about a punishment spanking may make it more effective.

By:
In: Female led relationship with discipline, Punishment

Spring is most certainly here. The sun is shining, and we have a preview of summer temperatures. Our area has a peculiar climate. According to the experts, it isn’t affected by global warming. Our temperatures are expected to remain stable for another hundred years. Garrison Keillor said we have spring 9 months of the year and summer the other three. It’s true. With rare exceptions, it’s in the 40s and 50s from November through May. Then we get a dry, sunny summer with temperatures of 80 during the day and 55 at night. People think we get a lot of rain. We don’t. Our annual rainfall in the Seattle area is the same as in New York. We get ours more slowly.

Anyway, We’ve had a warm (for us) week. Our daytime temperatures have hit 80 (yesterday). Nights are still cold and get down into the 30’s. I’ve grown very fond of this climate. If we want some hot weather, we can drive 50 miles across the Cascades, where the summer is more like the rest of the country.

Now that we’ve had the weather report, I can move on to the news. It’s been quiet since my orgasm last week. Apparently, Mrs. Lion has had some BDSM thoughts but hasn’t done anything about them. In her post yesterday, she wrote that she also hadn’t flexed her authority muscles. I commented that it’d been 20 years since anyone tried to put her down for doing that. Maybe her recent thoughts about being dominant with me in the past signals that she wants to flex her muscles on some level. I hope so.

Mrs. Lion isn’t alone when it comes to being challenged by assuming an authoritative marital role. She has no role models to help her. Some people writing on the Internet suggest marital discipline be equated with maternal power. This sends a negative message to women. I don’t think many women want to marry their sons. I don’t mean this in the sexual sense. I can’t imagine a woman wanting to be a mommy to her husband and her kids.

The maternal model is the only one available to women. Men have plenty of models when it comes to male authority. There is no issue with a man taking a paternal role with his wife. Western society is based on this. If a man is paternal, he doesn’t think of his wife as a daughter. He understands that his role extends beyond his kids. Disciplining his wife may look similar to how he treats his children, but he and his wife know it is different. For one thing, he holds her to a much higher standard than his kids. While similar to what he administers to his children, punishment is far more severe, suited to his adult wife.

We don’t offer a model of spousal authority. We badly need it. Mrs. Lion’s power isn’t maternal. It’s spousal. If she chooses to punish me like a child, it doesn’t mean she sees herself as my mother. She uses the best tools at her disposal to help me to be the best husband.  Those of us in female led relationships need to avoid relating what we do to maternal authority. It’s simply not correct.

Mrs. Lion is never going to be a tyrant. She needn’t worry about that. She is a fair and loving wife. She needs to stop worrying about the consequences of expressing her feelings. Her focus belongs on changing my behavior. Spousal discipline carries the obligation to help me to improve consistently. Each time she punishes me, I learn something. Spousal authority isn’t about punishment. It’s about positive change. It’s about building a strong, happy marriage.

By:
In: Mrs Lion Comments

The only problem with having warm weather is that it makes me feel like I have to take advantage of it and mow the lawn. The lawnmower was a challenge to start for the first time this year. It usually is. My goal was to finish the front lawn and take a break. I failed. It’s 80 degrees (I didn’t know it at the time), and I needed a break early. I’ll head back out after a rest and a long drink. After a rest and a long drink, I need to mess around with the air conditioners when I get back in. Yay.

I’m very glad that Lion doesn’t want to play with pee. It’s certainly not the most disgusting thing I’ve heard of, but I don’t want to do it. Lion said I must have thought about it because I want more power. I had that theory too. I’m not so sure. I know he wants me to feel powerful, but I don’t. I could always have yelled at him for interrupting me. I didn’t need his permission. Yes, I’m gun shy from my ex. Yes, I am one of the most non-confrontational people you’ll ever meet. (Except at work. I have balls of steel there. People always tell me that something I said will get back to the person I said it about, and I always tell them I’d say it to her face. They were very surprised when I actually did it once.) [Lion — This is exactly why I keep encouraging Mrs. Lion to demonstrate her power. It’s been nearly 20 years since she had her ex-husband pushing her around.]

Anyway, I don’t think I was looking for more power or a way to show Lion my power. I have plenty of ways to do that already. I think it popped into my head, like when you remember someone you went to school with or playing a game with your grandmother. Memories do that to you.

Today is the third day after Lion’s orgasm. I assume he’ll be getting horny soon. He may be now for all I know. I’m not sure what shape I’ll be in after mowing the lawn, but we can snuggle, and I can fiddle around with my weenie. He likes being petted even if I don’t do anything else as long as I don’t touch the balls. Rubbing them puts Lion to sleep. I’ve seen videos of people putting alligators to sleep by rubbing their tummies. I guess Lions and alligators have similar things in common.

By:
In: BDSM

I was surprised at Mrs. Lion’s post yesterday. I do remember the demo we watched where pee was everywhere. I wasn’t disgusted but couldn’t see the point. Being the target for urine is a very sexually submissive act. It’s obviously sexual. The people receiving it in the demo admitted it. I don’t remember drinking Mrs. Lion’s pee, but it sounds like something I might have wanted to try when trying on my role as a bottom. When I was a top, I had more than one woman who wanted me to pee on them. It didn’t turn me on, but it certainly did something for them. Once they took a shower, not the golden kind, they wanted hot sex.

In case you wondered, urine is nearly sterile. It is useful to clean wounds when nothing else is available. Peeing on someone stung by a jellyfish will help reduce the pain. Mrs. Lion wrote that you could safely drink your own urine for a day. That’s not entirely correct. It’s safe to drink urine if the donor doesn’t have a UTI. However, it isn’t safe to recycle your own pee. If you are so inclined, you can drink it once, but not the next time it comes out. Toxins concentrate in it.

I’m sure that’s more than you wanted to know. The thing is that this sort of knowledge is useful if you have that fetish. In my past life, I was in charge of safety for a BDSM organization. It was my job to understand how to play safely. Some of the activities were disturbing, even to me, but it was my job to understand the safest way to practice them. Some, like eating poop, are unsafe at any time. If it can be done, someone is going to want to do it. I learned that in my years in the scene.

One of my biggest complaints about people pairing up for BDSM activities after being “online” players is that they don’t know what they don’t know. The most important service that real-life BDSM groups offer is safety training and skilled dungeon monitors at play parties. If you visit any of the online BDSM boards, you will find “experienced” “masters” who have been doing BDSM for ten years–on their computers. These people are dangerous. They may be nice men and women with good intentions, but it takes training to do much more than light bondage and spanking.

Speaking of spanking, it’s probably the safest BDSM practice around. If blows are kept below the tailbone and above the knees, a paddling will hurt but won’t wound. Of course, common sense is needed too. But as painful practices go, as a bottom, I would feel safer being spanked than most anything else. Mrs. Lion and I have been playing for a long time. She is a safe and skilled player. She is also a very effective spanker.

It’s too easy to say “yuck” when presented with an unappealing practice. I am very sure that our anal play would draw a yuck from many vanilla people. I’m equally sure that most of them would be aroused if we talked about spanking. How do I know? Several studies have found that more than 85% of both men and women have spanking fantasies.

Any interest I might have had in drinking pee was purely experimental curiosity. I have no desire whatsoever to do it again. If Mrs. Lion insisted that I do it again, I guess I would. I have to obey her, after all. I would most certainly hate it. She knows that.