By:
In: Orgasm, Unscheduled orgasm

We ran our errands yesterday and had some fun with training collar. Well, I had fun. Lion nearly went through the ceiling. Today we’re watching a recording of a football game played in London, way too early for us to watch live. Chores will come later.

Last night we snuggled and then my hands wandered a bit. Lion loves my wandering hands. They usually wander just where he wants them. It didn’t take long for Mr. Weenie to respond.

Lion said my technique with my hand was not doing the trick. He said he needed more pressure on the bottom. Oh? I know this and thought I was doing it, but I played along.

I set myself up between his legs and licked up the bottom of my weenie. “Like that?” Lion moaned and said I had it. So I proceeded to torture him with differing amounts of pressure along the bottom. He really wanted to come.

I don’t normally pay too much attention to Lion’s scheduled date, but I was sure it was today. He always tells me I can check on the right side of the website. I know this. I also know that I’m not going to stop sucking him just to check the date.

Even though I thought I was a day early, I decided I didn’t really care when his date was. I’ll give him an orgasm when I want to give him an orgasm. And Lion, if he knows what’s good for him, won’t argue with that decision. He certainly didn’t last night.

And I started wondering about the scheduled orgasm as a whole. I haven’t talked to Lion yet, and we’ve gone back and forth about it previously, but I’m questioning if we need a scheduled date. Of course, there are pros and cons. I know Lion likes to have a date because he likes plans. But does it matter if I can just disregard the date anyway?

I suppose we can leave it as is. Lion gets his date to plan and I get to do what I want anyway. Another win-win.

By:
In: Lion's Journal, Male Control (training)
training collar below balls
This is the new training collar in place on Lion. It fits nicely behind the Jail Bird chastity device.

If you’re a regular reader, you know that we got a new “toy” (if you’re not, check out  here, here, and here). It’s a doggy training collar that delivers “communications” via a smart phone. I wear the business end of the device around my cock and balls. It fits nicely behind the base ring of the Jail Bird. It’s very comfortable to wear. At the touch of a button on her phone’s screen, Mrs. Lion can send a strong vibration or a shock to the device.

We tried it out yesterday. She delivered a very strong test shock while I was eating at IHop. In Costco she tried the vibration function. Happily, I can feel the vibration. It’s strong enough to cut through any distraction that may have my attention. The feeling isn’t sexual. Too bad. It just feels like a small vibrator under my balls. With the old unit, all she has available was the shock. So if she wasn’t correcting me and just wanted my attention, I got shocked. Now she has a painless alternative.

I like wearing this device. It gives me a heightened sense of vulnerability; the same sense I get when my hands (mostly) and feet are restrained. I am powerless to resist whatever Mrs. Lion wants to do. The training collar is like invisible bondage to me. I am constantly aware that by touching a button on her smart phone she can deliver sensations to my tenderest spot. I am powerless to resist. That’s a turn on for me.

The device is a win/win for us. It’s exciting for me to wear and it gives Mrs. Lion a use-anywhere tool that effortlessly corrects me and gets my attention whenever she wishes. In a way it’s like spanking to me; exciting in concept, miserable when received. Ok, the training collar isn’t anything near as painful as a spanking. It’s like a series of short slaps to my perineum. I get a zap every half second or so as long as her finger is on the button. The higher the intensity, the stronger and sharper the “slap”. Unlike a spanking, there are no after effects. There is no sensation after the “slap”. Interrupt Mrs. Lion, zap! Not so much painful as surprising and guaranteed to shut me up.

When I first heard of this application of a training collar, I figured it was way out on the edge play end of the kink scale. The entire concept of an electrical shock under my balls seemed very extreme. Most of our readers feel that way too. The first device we had (post), turned out to be impractical. It was uncomfortable to wear and Mrs. Lion needed to carry a special remote control to use it. The shocks were far less controllable.

This new device is easy to adapt for under-ball wear, very safe, comfortable, and offers two effective way to get my atention or correct me for a misdeed. It seems extreme. Most people think using one on a dog is cruel. How much worse must it be for a man? It turns out that on a dog, the device is a humane, fun (really!) way to train your dog. It isn’t painful. When properly set up, it provides just enough stimulation to get the dog’s attention. In most applications the vibrator is all that is ever needed.

The same is true for a man. The concept of the device seems wrong, even cruel. But in practice, I’ve learned it is a safe, effective way for a disciplining wife to maintain physical control anywhere they are together; even in public. Just knowing I am wearing it makes me more attentive. It’s a very new feeling to realize that I am actually under Mrs. Lion’s physical control even in a quiet restaurant. She doesn’t have to postpone correction. She has that ability with her at all times. Just unlock her smart phone and touch a button. I get the message. Most significantly, I am always aware she can do this. I have to admit it makes me be much more careful with my behavior.

This training collar has one fantasy-inviting feature: Other people can download the app and if Mrs. Lion gives them the PIN, they have the ability to zap me too. The classic fantasy where the husband’s mother-in-law or sister-in-law punishes him can come to real life with this device. Anyone who has an iPhone or Android phone can get the power. I hope Mrs. Lion doesn’t share  the PIN with her friends from the office.

By:
In: Mrs Lion Comments

We were heading out the door this morning for breakfast when Lion saw his new training collar on the kitchen table. He remembered that we agreed he’d wear it when we went out together. He said he guessed he was in for punishment since he hadn’t remembered it the night before when we went out. Um…sure. Yeah. I mean, yes you are! (I’d obviously forgotten the agreement.) He put it on and we tried it a few times to adjust for degree of zap comfort. We settled on six.

When we sat down to breakfast, I had my phone out looking at something and I zapped him out of the blue. He almost shot through the ceiling. Apparently six is fine when he’s standing in the kitchen. Six is not fine when he’s sitting down. I turned it down to one. Unless I’m extremely angry at him, I can’t imagine wanting to zap him at a level six. That seems to me to be reserved for the equivalent of a kid running into the street. You want to make sure that behavior doesn’t happen again. I have no idea what sort of behavior Lion would do to rate a six. Maybe if he actually touched one of those cute butts he’s always looking at. There’s also a vibrate feature that can be used as a sort of “hey, pay attention” function.

We were going to test out how far away he can be to feel it but Costco was too crowded to even think about trying it there. By the time we were off on our other errands, I forgot to test it. Oh well, there’s always tomorrow. And we can always play Zapardy! next week sometime. That’s fun. For me, at least.

Last night was the first night I’ve edged Lion in about three days. We were waiting for his weenie/base ring sore to heal. In the meantime, we snuggled a lot. It’s always nice to be close even if we don’t do anything else. Yes, men can be happy “just” snuggling. I know we give them a lot of crap about only thinking about sex, but sometimes they like to snuggle too. And it’s not always just to get sex. I admit, snuggling usually does lead to edging Lion, but it doesn’t always. And let’s face it, if I’m in charge, he has to be happy with what he gets.

By:
In: Female led relationship with discipline, Lion's Journal

Practicality has returned to my naked-at-home rule. I’m back to undressing in the bedroom and remaining dressed when we have something to do shortly after I arrive. I now realize that what I liked about the stricter rule that required instant stripping was that there was a sort of D/S flavor to complying. That’s a turn on. But, in terms of advancing our female led relationship, it was more of a distraction than a benefit.

Enforced chastity, particularly wearing a chastity device, has a bondage/BDSM flavor. That’s what got my attention when I asked Mrs. Lion to lock me up. It was really exciting. By the time the novelty wore off, we were both committed to my surrender. Over time, as Mrs. Lion wrote in her post yesterday, we’ve found enforced chastity improved our relationship.

By the time we decided to try a female led relationship, we felt very positive about the value of a power exchange. Unlike enforced chastity, FLR is not a simple, easy-to-define power exchange. The concept is simple, but implementation is much harder for us. We started with what we thought was a simple training  program to help us build habits that support FLR and domestic discipline. I got simple rules, like waiting for Mrs. Lion to eat before I started. Infractions earned a spanking. Our thinking was that if we got in the habit of obedience and consequences, other, less obvious areas of our lives would also fall into place.

Mrs. Lion is good at observing and punishing infractions. We’re successful at integrating those rules and punishments into our daily lives. It doesn’t seem to me that either of us has used what we learned to change the dynamic of our relationship. One possibility is that our longstanding power dynamic, partnership, continues to serve us very well. That doesn’t mean it can’t be improved.

I think we need to extend our agreement beyond simple rules to more significant surrender. The challenge is how to do this. What is the next relational baby step for us to take? I tend to think in black and white terms. For example, perhaps I should ask permission for everything I do. We discussed this. Let’s face it, we can’t do that. It takes too much time and energy. We agreed that approach makes no sense.

The obvious choice is to figure out some new, more important rules. Fair enough. But what should they be? If you expect me to reveal the new, master plan in this post, I can’t. We’ve had endless discussions about the next step. So far we haven’t come up with anything. Maybe we shouldn’t advance past simple, behavioral rules. Maybe what we have now is a perfect match to our skills and personalities. If that’s true, the power exchange can continue happily on a superficial level.

New rules won’t challenge our relationship dynamic. Instead they will be limited to a sort of lion “training”. This is not unlike dog training; basic obedience with no effort to change the nature of the animal. Worth a shot perhaps. What do you think, Mrs. Lion.