Pretty Panties
When I was in the shower last night I was thinking about making Lion wear diapers when he gets home from work tonight. I decided he’d have to wear them after he peed until just before he needed to pee again. And he’d have to wear them until morning when he could wash off to go to work. It flashed through my mind that he should have to wear them to work too but I dismissed that idea. Then I remembered the panties. He hasn’t worn them for a while. Why not make him wear them to work?
This morning he pulled a pair out of his drawer just as I was leaving for work. He’d remembered. What a good boy! He may not remember he has them on until he needs to pee but then he’ll see them and feel pretty. Yeah. Right. He’ll feel silly. But he’ll know that he’s wearing them because I want him to be pretty. And it’s one way I can be with him throughout the day.
I wonder if he thinks about it that way. I imagine he really does forget he’s wearing panties. But when he remembers, does he think of me? Does he feel like I’m with him? Even just a little bit? Does he feel loved? Does he feel controlled? [Lion – I sure do!] I know I think he looks sexy in them. Anything that draws attention to his butt works for me. And I feel good knowing he loves me enough to wear the silly things even though they were his idea in the first place. It’s a complex world we live in.
Lion will likely get home after I do. I’ll see those panties when he gets undressed. I’ve given up the idea of the diapers for tonight. Perhaps tomorrow or another night this week I’ll have a pair waiting for him when he gets home. Maybe it will be a weekend thing. For now he’s got his cute little butt in some cute panties.
And They’re Off!
I’m not sure what turns me on now. It’s an odd feeling; I miss sexual activity but I’m not horny. Maybe I’m like an old racehorse, munching grass in a meadow, remembering those amazing Saturday afternoons when I ran headlong around the track. Am I out to pasture? I know, I say this sort of thing and then recover the old energy. One day that’s not going to happen. Maybe it isn’t now, but it’s inevitable.
Let’s assume that now is that time. What would change? Clearly, there would be no anxiously waiting for the next orgasm; no more edging. The sexual power exchange would die with my loss of libido. What about our FLR? Is sexual tension the foundation on which it is built? I’ve been thinking about it. Arousal is one of the most powerful motivators for a male in a FLR. Sexual arousal is like a light drawing a moth. It’s the arousing thought of a spanking that drives men to accept what turns out to be a painful beating.
What if the sexual motivation is absent? Would I still submissively get into position and stay there while I am beaten? Would I want new rules? The big question is simply: Is male submission rooted in sexual feelings?
Of course, it’s impossible to generalize, but based on what I’ve observed, the vast majority of guys who seek to be dominated by a woman are driven by the overwhelming sexual excitement of being in that role. I admit that my attraction to enforced male chastity as well as FLR have sexual roots. I wasn’t entirely driven by sex. I had other reasons as well.
Reasons for entry notwithstanding, now that I am in it, what will keep me there? I could say that nothing will and if I let it go, so will Mrs. Lion. If the only reason that Mrs. Lion has assumed her role is to please me, has all this time living it given her a different reason to keep it going. I really don’t know if that’s happened.
So far, through horny time and uninterested times, our FLR with discipline continues unabated. Neither of us views sex as a necessary ingredient to this power exchange. Obviously, our sexual power exchange becomes moot during these times. Do we have a strong enough foundation to go on, long term, without it?
Of course, tonight Mrs. Lion might turn on the Magic Wand and my libido comes out from hiding. Even if it does, the big question still stays hanging over us: Can we sustain our power exchange without the red-hot, racing fuel of sex?
Life and the Lions
Yesterday we installed a new light fixture in the yard to replace one that died. Lion’s shoulder is still out of commission for the most part so I was up and down the ladder. I took Tylenol to ward off pain before it started and it seemed to work fairly well. I had to take a few breaks along the way but we got the job done. Today is reserved for shopping and laundry and I don’t feel any worse than normal after being up a ladder yesterday.
At dinner Lion said he thought he might be back to his old self again. We tested that theory by snuggling and then I gave him oral. It seemed like he was getting close but he asked if we could stop. He felt like he was stuck. He’d gotten so far and then couldn’t get the rest of the way. I guess it felt good but the was some hurdle he couldn’t get past. No problem. We’ll try again tonight. One way or another I’ll get him to the edge whether it’s tonight or whenever.
Maybe it’s because I generally go with the flow, but I’m usually not as concerned as Lion is when things don’t go well. He’s sure he’s broken for good. He’ll never have another orgasm. I’ll find someone new and leave him and the dog. That’s silly. The dog is coming with me! (Teasing, Lion.) I know deep down he knows I’m not going anywhere, he’ll have another orgasm and within a few days things will be back to normal.
Part of wielding my power is knowing when to wield my power. He may not feel like being edged or pegged but the rules are still in effect. I may not punish him right away. I may just keep a list of infractions for a night when he’s up to it. If he’s not in the mood then it loses some of its effectiveness. He’d be more likely to have negative feelings for me than to be mad at himself for doing the crime. I may be wrong but that’s what I think right now.
At any rate, life goes on and as long as we’re still moving forward we’re good. Sex and play will fall into place soon. We’ll both make sure of that.
Free Range Lion
While I was helping Mrs. Lion prepare breakfast yesterday, I noticed that we had purchased “free range” eggs. We normally buy whatever is cheapest in the warehouse store. This time they were free-range eggs. I commented that I was free range too. I’m still uncaged. Mrs. Lion gave me that look and said that could change at any time. The Jail Bird sits on my nightstand always ready to take its place locking up my cock. So far it’s gathering dust next to my alarm clock.
I have mixed feelings about being wild. On one hand, I like the freedom and my ability to stand up and pee. It will also make using the gym easier. As I’ve written before, I’m not tempted to take advantage of my access for unauthorized playing. It surprised me that I’m so well trained. There’s nothing like 3 1/2 years of constant lockup to wash those nasty thoughts away.
Mrs. Lion has no immediate plans to lock me back up. In fact, she’s repurposed the cage into a punishment tool. Her plan is to lock me up without release for varying periods of time as punishment for breaking rules. A shortened sentence should be no worse that my former full-time lockup. It wasn’t unusual for Mrs. Lion to skip a day of teasing, leaving me caged for two days without a short release for edging.
I have to admit, I started to get antsy after no teasing for two days. On rare occasions when one of us was sick, I would go three days without teasing. It wasn’t the worst thing in the world. There was only one occasion way in the past, when Mrs. Lion told me I would stay locked without teasing because I broke a rule. After that, she never used withholding of stimulation to punish me.
It isn’t having to be caged again that would bother me if I’m locked up for punishment. I’m comfortable in the cage and very used to wearing it 24/7. I’m very sure that lack of sexual contact would bother me eventually. I suppose that leaving me wild and withholding stimulation would have the same effect on me. But I think that the cage underlines my helplessness. One of the main attractions of being locked up was my absolute loss of control over my penis. Once locked up, it’s useless for anything sexual, even an erection.
That’s the cool thing about bondage of any kind; it removes choice. And that’s the source of my mixed feelings. I like bondage. I liked being locked into my cage. I wasn’t very fond of the inconveniences it brought. Since my surgery, the cage would have made things much more difficult for me. We tried. It was painful for me to put the base ring on. Mrs. Lion has me do that. She handles the cage.
She decided that since getting that ring on and off was so difficult for me, it wasn’t time to go back into lockup. Now that I am sufficiently recovered to get the ring on, she’s decided that we would see how we do with male chastity and our restored intimacy without the cage. Make no mistake, I haven’t regained sexual control. Mrs. Lion is the only one who can edge me or give me release. In that respect things are going on as usual. The only difference right now is that we’ve removed the hardware.
