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In: 2.0, Female led relationship with discipline, Lion's Journal, Punishment

spanked lionSince Mrs. Lion has been “warming” me up, our spankings that once numbered in less than ten swats are now up in the hundreds. It’s true that the majority are rather mild, but Mrs. Lion builds up nicely as things go on. She spanked me on Saturday night. I had interrupted and had been snarky once. She began with light taps, building quickly to swats I could truly feel. As her spanking got more intense, I kicked my feet and begged her to stop. I asked her what I had done wrong. She told me and then resumed hitting my butt.

I begged her to stop and promised never to do it again (yeah sure). She kept on swatting. I tried to turn over and got a hard look. I turned back on my stomach. A few more swats and she stopped. I was actually sorry she stopped. I think we were getting into the territory when I would actually feel the catharsis I’ve heard about.  She said she saw a bruise come up and decided I had enough. I am crazy to say this, but I hadn’t.

On Saturday, when we started the spanking, we tried with me over her lap. She sat on the bed and I was positioned on the bed so my butt was over her lap. She had to lean back a bit to accommodate me. When she started spanking me, it felt completely different. It was more intimate, somehow more intense and personal. It was humiliating. I don’t get any of those feelings when I lie flat on the bed, with Mrs. Lion standing over me. I didn’t expect that.

Unfortunately, her leaning-back position was uncomfortable for her. We went back to me lying flat on the bed. I suggested we could try the couch next time. Mrs. Lion was naked when she spanked me. I wonder how it would feel if she were dressed? She used her hairbrush paddle. That is a super effective tool. She also spread my cheeks and spanked inside my crack. This was a great addition. I think she needs to do more of it to get a lasting reaction from me.

None of this means she isn’t doing a great job. If anything, it means she is doing so well, I’m ready to try to go to the next level. Maybe we are off the punishment plateau.

Yesterday was our first serious foray into humiliation play. I spent the day in a pair of frilly panties. When she remembered, Mrs. Lion reminded me of what I was wearing under my jeans. I was surprised to discover how comfortable the panties are to wear.

This is very new to both of us. Mrs. Lion is starting to get her head wrapped around it. I am too. It seems to me there are two components to this activity. The first, of course, is to make me wear feminine clothing. The second, and perhaps more important, is to tell me how cute I am as a girl. This component, I think, is difficult for Mrs. Lion. The same sort of thing is largely missing from spankings; telling me I am a naughty boy/girl and treating me as a child.

Humiliation play and discipline are both psychological and physical. Both, in different ways, establish the power of the top. They also assert ownership. This aspect isn’t necessarily obvious. Punishment, in my view, should be both painful and humiliating A sore bottom does make a point. A sore bottom and a soapy mouth drives it home. A sore bottom, soapy mouth and a scolding and forced promises to be good, adds the psychological humiliation that emphasizes the power that Mrs. Lion has.

I’m not suggesting I always get my mouth soaped. It probably should have been on Saturday. I am suggesting that I need something after the spanking to force me to consider what I have done. Generally, I get spanked and then turn on the TV and the evening goes on. My focus is only briefly aimed at my misdeeds.

Forced cross dressing, for me at least, is a way to make sure I know who is in charge. I’m never going to learn to like wearing female clothing. If, for example, I am always required to wear panties, I will forget they are there until I need to go to the men’s room. I have to unbutton and zip down the fly to make room to get my cage and balls out. There is a danger of discovery. If I am wearing panties, they will be very visible, especially if they are pink or some other color associated with female undies. That can never feel routine for me. I’ve had the fantasy that one morning I will open my underwear drawer and find my regular underpants are gone and panties there instead. Or, I find all my underwear missing and a pair of panties spread out on the bed.

We have both characterized the next version of my lioness as 2.0. She has always been attributed with the ability to spank to tears and do things to me without regard for my enjoyment of the activities. 2.0 is a strict dominant. One thing we never discussed was how 2.0 would talk to me; how she would use words to reinforce her domination. I don’t think Mrs. Lion and I have talked much about this at all. It’s come up after I read a post by a dominant female who “scolds” and uses some demeaning terms to put her submissive male in his place. It’s never been anything 2.0 would do.

Part of the reason this has never come up is that I’ve failed to bring it up. It isn’t that I haven’t thought about, even fantasized about Mrs. Lion treating me this way. I have. It also scares me. It will, I think, force me to understand my new role. It’s the same thing with cross dressing. I’m taken out of my normal comfort zone and forced to live in another one created by my lioness. I am not easy to tame. I know it is best if I am submissive and obedient and recognize my role. But I don’t want to do it. I have to be trained. I’ve asked for this because it is the right thing for me. It isn’t necessarily what I want. I have to be taught.

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In: 2.0, Mrs Lion Comments, Punishment

If Lion has behaved himself, by the time this post publishes he will have finished his twenty-four hour diaper punishment. Ironically, I think it was the add-on punishment of no sex that bothered him more. Maybe not. He really does hate diapers, especially wet ones.

The good news for Lion is that his weenie will no longer be stinky and, as such, eligible for fondling and other assorted activities. He reported that he was very horny last night. I’m hoping the timeout only made him hornier. I really love a horny Lion. Is that why I edge him almost every night? No, but it is one of the benefits. There’s just something about my weenie when he’s standing so tall and proud. Yum!

The other day was my first foray into alternate punishment. As far as I can remember I’ve never used diapers as a punishment. I certainly never used sex, or lack thereof, either. I just couldn’t see spanking Lion for the third day in a row on an already-sore butt. I’m sure he would have been fine, but it seemed a bit excessive to me. I know he doesn’t like diapers. Up till now I’ve used them to make him feel uncomfortable, to show him who’s boss. He’d wear them under whatever parameters I set, and then he’d be done. It was, like a butt plug, a set it and forget it form of play.

Because we were close to the weekend, I knew he could wear the diaper without anyone knowing about it. He wouldn’t be squirming through a meeting in a wet diaper. If there was a smell, no one else would notice it. I bet he could have worn them to work. I didn’t notice any smell. He even announced he’d be working from home Monday if I wanted him to continue with the diapers. I know he said twenty-four hours is not sufficient time for punishment, but I like to take baby steps. Next time he may wear them longer. Who knows?

The no-sex aspect was an afterthought. In the past, if he was mid-diaper-wearing session, he’s washed off and I’ve played with him before he goes back into the diaper. Of course, in the past the diaper wasn’t a punishment. And I started thinking about how warm and stinky it would get in a wet diaper and decided I wanted no part of it. Hence, no sex. I don’t usually make him wear a diaper to bed either because he gets too hot at night. I did this time. There were all sorts of changes with this punishment.

Did you ever notice that 2.0 shows up just after Lion accuses me of not wanting to play anymore? I think she wants to make him eat his words and then she fades into the background again. She really needs to stick around longer.

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In: 2.0, Lion's Journal, Spanking
Here I am after my July 4th spanking. I guess I am red, black and blue. (Click image to see full-size)

Mrs. Lion reads all my posts, generally before I post them. She supplies proofreading support that I truly appreciate. Anyway, after reading my rather depressed post about what I learned on my vacation, she told me she still had interest. She agreed that play and discipline took a backseat to whatever else we were doing. She expressed no opinion about why this happened, but resolved to fix things.

So she did. That very afternoon, when we got back from our adventures, I was told to be naked with my training collar on. She said she was going to spank me. We had been discussing spanking techniques for the last few weeks. Initially, my suggestion was that a disciplinary spanking started with very hard swats and continued that way. For over a year that’s the technique Mrs. Lion has been using. She’s never been able to give me more than eight or ten swats before it is too much for me.

Julie of “Strict Julie Spanks” left a comment here that started me thinking. I wrote a post about it. Julie wrote that when she spanks her husband, he can say “Yellow” which means the swats are too hard to take. He can also say “Red” which stops everything, presumably for a true emergency. Mrs. Lion and I discussed that other spankers report giving 200-300 swats or more in a spanking. We have almost never hit ten. I suggested that, like Julie, perhaps the swats need to build up over time so that I get used to being hit.

That sounded to us like a play spanking. That’s when the intensity is controlled to allow the bottom’s endorphins to keep up with the stimulation. That didn’t sound like punishment to either of us. But then, the six or eight swats I generally get didn’t seem all that serious either. Mrs. Lion decided to try the slower buildup method. She did the other night. She slowly built in intensity. When it got to be too much for me, she backed off, way off. Then she quickly got back to the real swats. The spanking lasted well over 200 swats (no, neither of us were counting, but I’m sure we got past 200). When it was over, my butt was well bruised with white spots in other places. It burned and I could feel it all night, even when in a comfy chair.

I don’t get all that red (see image above, right), even after a spanking like that. I also “heal” remarkably fast with almost no trace of the spanking in the morning. This has always been true of me. Oh well, it gives Mrs. Lion a fresh canvas every day. Even though most of the marks faded, it still hurts to sit today. Yes, it was an effective spanking.

The big question is how we distinguish between a “play” spanking and a disciplinary one? The answer is actually very simple: I know we are playing in one case and I am being punished in the other. The disciplinary spanking takes place when and where Mrs. Lion wants. While I can ask her to back off, I can’t stop her. As she gets more experienced at this technique, like Julie, she will “sneak” past my limit and hit me with even harder swats. Over time, she will also learn how far she wants to go. I am deceptive in that my butt looks as though I have been brutally beaten, but turns out to be mark-free the next morning. That’s not to say it doesn’t hurt to sit.

I’m writing this in the late afternoon. We drove home today from our vacation trip. I interrupted Mrs. Lion more than once. That means once she has recovered from driving I can look forward to the second of this new sort of spanking. I am very sure it will last longer and be more intense.

By:
In: 2.0, Spanking

Lion is wild again today. He made it the whole day at home with the plastic chastity cage on with minimal problems. When I removed it last night, there was a slight pink line where the base ring was. This happens with the Jail Bird too so I don’t think this is really a problem. However, Lion said he wasn’t sure about going to work in a cage yet.

Right now he’s being pulled in different directions. He’s working on a different project since he’s been back. He has physical therapy and a doctor’s appointment today. It wouldn’t be a good time to be messing around with a cage. When things get under control better I’ll lock him up for good. Maybe I’ll cage him for a whole weekend so he can get used to it again.

We haven’t played for a few days. The other night I figured we’d just take a night off. Last night we got caught up in watching TV. We did snuggle briefly both nights. The jealous dog can attest to that. She gets very offended when we snuggle. Tonight I’ll make a point of bringing out the Magic Wand for some Lion fun.

This morning Lion asked if 2.0 was home. I said she might be home but I’m at work. He’s wondering when she’ll show up full time. I am too. I’m trying to entice her by being stricter with Lion. Tonight might be time for maintenance swats. He mentioned the tawse we got a while ago. I know I did a very pathetic test on his but when we first got it, but I have not really hit him hard with it.

Sometimes he thinks I don’t hit very hard. He thinks I’m holding back. I haven’t been holding back. I’m probably not hitting as hard as I can, but I’m hitting as hard as I want to. I’m fairly sure my accuracy would suffer if I hit as hard as I could.I don’t think he’d like random swats on his thighs or back. Then again, he’s in no position to argue.