By:
In: Lion's Journal, Spanking

I was looking at Julie’s post, a random photo selection on her blog, Strict Julie Spanks. At the top of the post there’s  a picture of a man standing in a corner, hands above his head, with a very red butt (photo shopped — real butts never photograph that red).  Standing behind and to one side is a young woman holding a large paddle. I guess that counts as femdom porn. For those of us who get turned on by the idea of being spanked it is arousing.

I focused my attention on the woman with the paddle. She had, what looked to me as a mock-stern expression. It started me thinking about Mrs. Lion who has put me in a corner after reddening my bottom. I know she spanks me because I asked her to discipline me. When she punishes me is she imagining herself in a role? Has the concept of punishing her husband become a normal part of her experience as a wife?

When we began our FLRD (Female Led Relationship with Discipline), I know that she was punishing me because I asked for her to take on that job. Over the last three years or so, she has perfected her role. In a recent post, she commented that she was taken back by people in her family eating before she started. I’m required to wait for her to eat or get her permission before I can start a meal.

The fact that my rule has become a natural expectation she has even when not with me, suggests that she has internalized her role to some extent. I don’t want to label this one event as a signal she is now a different woman; a stern disciplinarian who takes that role seriously. It almost certainly isn’t. But I believe something’s happened.

Her role as disciplining wife has “soaked in” to some extent. I’m pretty sure it isn’t completely “natural” for her to pick up a paddle and spank me. I do believe she fully accepts correcting me as part of her life. Punishing me seems to still present challenges.

Spanking, currently her only form of punishment, is still somewhat uncertain. I get the feeling she hasn’t figured out how much and how long to spank me. What is the objective? This isn’t a simple question. The simplest, BDSM answer is to do it enough to satisfy me that I’ve been spanked. She does that now and then when she senses I’ve had enough, she goes on a little more.

I believe that extra swatting is a way to let me know she is punishing me. Fair enough. But is it enough? If I’m right about her technique, I’m still controlling the situation. To some extent every person being spanked is in some control.  I send signals that she interprets and acts upon. The fact she correctly understands when I feel that I’ve had enough is a great accomplishment.

That point may be a cue for her to say, “Now we start the real punishment.” Anything that happens after I signal that I’ve had enough is going to be interpreted by me as unwelcome pain that I don’t want to accept; in other words, punishment. It doesn’t come down to how red my bottom gets or how many bruises I have. It’s much more primal.  It’s me accepting spanking way past my comfort zone.

I’ve read some disciplining wives who divide the spanking into sections. The first part, the one I accept willingly, is 25%, preparing me to be punished. Then, the real punishment begins. The spanking is kept up without pause. It should make me yelp and scream. That’s 50%. The last 25% is hard and fast and keeps going until sincere apologies are forthcoming.

This formula produces a spanking that will always be a very good deterrent. More importantly, it is a formula that can be impartially followed. It doesn’t say anything about how hard or how red. Just, using my reactions to set the pace, but not call the shots.

There’s one other thing. Mrs. Lion expects me to thank her for spanking me. I usually need prodding to remember. Perhaps I should be required to remain in the spanking position when Mrs. Lion is done. Then, she can wait for my thanks. If it doesn’t come, she could resume her spanking until I remember. Letting me get up and out of the submissive position lets me lose my focus.

Of course, these are just suggestions. Mrs. Lion is perfectly capable of disciplining me as she sees fit. Blame it on Julie’s blog. It got me thinking, and you know what that means.

 

 

By:
In: Lion's Journal
lions eating out
We like to eat out when we travel.

My allergies have been off the hook lately. Aside from the stuffy nose, sneezing, and coughing, my libido has been in the toilet. This too will pass. Now that we are on our vacation trip, I’m hoping the mountain air will give me a reprieve. I also wonder if my body has learned that nothing is going to happen until at least four days pass.

Yesterday was the fourth day. That was also the day we drove over four hours and set up our trailer. We also had to go to a nearby town for some supplies and cell service. Today  (the fifth waiting day), is the first real opportunity for ejaculation. Of course, that depends on Mrs. Lion’s interest in getting me off. She may want to play and tease me. Or, she may not want to do anything at all.

On past trips, we had very little sexual/play action. It isn’t that Mrs. Lion has no interest. Since we need to take her truck to drag the trailer, she usually does the lion’s share of the driving. By the time we get back to the trailer in the afternoon, she needs a break. Then we usually go out again for dinner; another long round trip drive. She’s tired.

Hopefully, on this trip we will figure out a way around this. Play/sex first thing in the morning just doesn’t work for me. I’m not a morning person at all. Maybe this time we will work out a way to play. If we don’t, it’s OK. We love doing things together. Mrs. Lion brought a big bag full of toys — her Go Bag. Clearly, the intention is to use it on this trip.

I will remain hopeful. I realize that our daily prowling around the area does sap energy. It may end up that we don’t get to do much sexually on our trips. I’m hoping we can find a way to do more, but It’s fine if we don’t.

 

By:
In: Anal play, BDSM

figged maleMrs. Lion and I ventured out and stopped at our local supermarket. There in the produce department was a nice selection of ginger root. Cooking Chinese? Thai? Nope. Figging! Ginger root adds heat to many dishes. Properly prepared, it will provide anal entertainment. Figging has long been used as a punishment and for BDSM play.

Figging is a great example of play with improvised “toys”. In this case, purchase ginger root. Like the one in the picture [right], it has reasonably straight cylindrical parts. The root should be thick enough so you can carve it into a nice butt plug shape. It needs to be wide enough to challenge your bottom’s anus. It needs to be a very tight fit. Thicker is better in this case.

Preparation is easy. Cut the root so that you have at least one fairly straight piece at least five-inches long. If you can get a longer piece, it is better. Next trim the piece to get rid of big nubs. Now take your veggie peeler and remove the skin. Use a knife to give the end a nice rounded shape. Some people actually carve a butt plug shape. The narrower neck of that shape will help retain the ginger. The image [Left] illustrates some nice ginger carving.

If you’re wondering why you are doing this art project, wonder no more. Ginger contains essential oils that produce an intensely hot sensation when applied to sensitive areas of the body like the anus or vagina. See where we are going? When you fig your bottom, you are inserting the peeled and carved ginger where the “sun don’t shine.” The sensations produced are very intense. You may want him restrained. The procedure is simple: Insert the ginger and assure it stays where you put it. Do not use any lube. Take your time if it doesn’t go in easily, but do not use lube.

Within a short time, he will begin to feel an intense burning sensation. He isn’t really being injured. It’s the essential oils at work. The sensation will build and stay very intense for about ten minutes. Depending on the individual the sensation may become intolerable. As the top, you can decide if it needs to come out before the oils are exhausted. It depends on how much of a softie you are.

For figging, ginger improves with age. A couple of weeks in the vegetable compartment of your fridge will intensify the sensation the root will deliver. You may want to buy extra on your shopping trip to experiment with aged root and see how it compares with the fresh product.

Figging can be used as a punishment; in which case you probably won’t remove it until the effect wears off. In any case, once you try it, a trip to the produce department will never been the same.

 

By:
In: Keyholder, Keyholder101, Lion's Journal, Punishment

Things are tightening up around the lion’s den. Mrs. Lion has also been thinking about an activity which I admit that I love to hate: spanking. When we got home from our long weekend, Mrs. Lion gave me the four hard swats called for in my Naughty Lion coupon. She used a hardwood (bloodwood) paddle with a very rough anti-skid tape applied to one side. I could feel every grain of that tape with each swat. THe next night she commented as she plugged my ass, that my cheeks were still rosy from my spanking.  She said she could see the markings from the non-skid tape.

I know that Mrs. Lion has wanted to provide more lasting sensation after a spanking. I admit that I would like that too. She has had very limited success marking me (bruising). In her defense, I have to say that over the years tops who spanked me have had similar complaints. I don’t mark easily. In her post  the other day, she wrote that she thought the heavy, wooden spoon would mark me. It should, but last time she used it, there were no lasting marks. Over the years I have learned that creating marks takes a special sort of swat. Many tops, including me, like to leave a “souvenir” or two on the bottoms we spank. Mrs. Lion does know exactly the right spot to swat me (green circles). She does that knowing full well I will feel it most there. I do and yelp each time she hits me. I think she likes my yelps.

When you go for a marking swat it is administered alone; that is, a long pause is taken both before and after administering it. One top warned me by saying, “I’m going to mark you now.” Markng requires an implement with a small surface area and a long enough handle to give good leverage. The large wooden spoon is a very good choice. The back of that spoon is fiendishly small. In the image of my butt (above),  you can see the the areas circled in red represent the prime locations for marks. Ideally, one per cheek will assure that the spanking will be remembered long after it is done. Within that sweet spot, lower and toward the crack is most tender and most memorable locations for bruises. Using the implement a very hard swat is required for the desired result.

I know that many couples don’t include spanking in their chastity lifestyle. We do because it is something that turns me on, at least before and after the fact. During the spanking I am always sorry I asked for it. Mrs. Lion has worked hard to overcome her feelings about “hurting” me. I am very grateful that she is so successful in providing this stimulation. While not every caged male will find spanking a useful part of the enforced chastity experience, it is something worth discussing and  potentially exploring. It certainly works for me.