By:
In: ED

When a man can’t reach orgasm or needs excessive stimulation to get there, it’s a condition called anorgasmia or delayed orgasm. This has been my problem. I figured that I had reached the end of the line and would have to give up sex.

You probably know about Viagra and Cialis. These drugs help some men get better erections. They work by helping the blood flow into the penis. They don’t cause erections. They help when a man is sexually aroused. When that doesn’t work, injections of Trimix or one of its relatives are used. These injections produce erections whether or not the man is aroused. None of these drugs assure that the man will have an orgasm.

Trimax will make me hard. It’s a reliable-but-expensive way to get a boner. Mrs. Lion has been trying to get me off for almost eighty days. I can’t get over the top. I get excited and my Trimix-induced erection gets even harder. After a while, my excitement goes away. It’s like a switch is turned off. I stay hard thanks to the Trimix, but I’m no longer aroused.

I saw my sexual dysfunction urologist on Tuesday and told her about this problem. To my surprise she said that there’s a drug that will probably help. A pill to make me horny enough to ejaculate? Yup, that’s what she said. I never heard of such a thing; a sex pill to make me have an orgasm. Wow!

I picked up the prescription yesterday and took the first dose. The drug is called cabergoline. It inhibits prolactin, a hormone that is believed to affect the male orgasm. It was observed that men who ejaculated prematurely had low levels of this hormone in their bloodstream. Men with anorgasmia had high levels. Cabergoline inhibits that hormone. It was developed as a treatment for Parkinson’s. Baylor University did a study to find out if cabergoline improved men’s ability to climax. It did in over half the men1. That’s what I’m going to try. It’s even covered by my insurance!

Unfortunately, there have been very few studies on the sexual effects of cabergoline. The small studies that have been done suggest that the drug can help with sexual interest and arousal, erections, orgasms, and increased seminal fluid. The drug can have serious side effects that range from headache, constipation, and diarrhea to lowered blood pressure and depression. Report any issues to your health care team.

High prolactin levels in women are associated with lactation. This drug is sometimes used to help with that. There is some evidence that reduced prolactin levels in women also increase libido2. Granted, the data is sparse, but it’s worth considering. I asked Mrs. Lion to get her prolactin levels checked. It seems logical that if a hormone can affect male sexuality, why not affect female sexuality as well?

I took my first dose of cabergoline (2.5mg) on Wednesday afternoon. This dose is half of the typical amount men take for these conditions. It’s standard to start with the lower dose. I suppose it shakes out potential side effects and may turn out to be enough. In the past, I wrote about my poor semen production (“Of Course“). That post was over a year ago. Wouldn’t it be great if these little pills not only increased my libido but also brought back the semen that Mrs. Lion loves so much?

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1Hollander, A. B., Pastuszak, A. W., Hsieh, C., Johnson, W. G., Scovell, J. M., Mai, C. K., & Lipshultz, L. I. (2016). Cabergoline in the Treatment of Male Orgasmic Disorder—A Retrospective Pilot Analysis. Sexual Medicine, 4(1), e28. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.esxm.2015.09.001
 
2Galdiero M, Pivonello R, Grasso LF, Cozzolino A, Colao A. Growth hormone, prolactin, and sexuality. J Endocrinol Invest. 2012 Sep;35(8):782-94. doi: 10.1007/BF03345805. PMID: 23014134.

 

 

By:
In: Domestic discipline, Sex
woman spanking man

I asked for it. In my post (“The Surprising Reason Why I Need To Be Spanked More Often“), I wrote that my last two spankings seemed milder than Mrs. Lion’s usual. I also (foolishly) suggested that I need much more frequent spankings. Mrs. Lion took my post to heart and brought out the spanking bench after dinner. I don’t know how long the spanking lasted, but it made me do a lot of yelping.

small silicone paddle spanking between my ass cheeks

She used the heavy leather paddle most of the time. We had a brief interlude when she spread my cheeks wide and applied the vicious little blue silicone paddle to the very tender skin on my perineum and between my cheeks. I was lucky that she didn’t spend too much time working there. It was starting to get very uncomfortable. She also used wood paddles to very painful effect.

When she finished, I had some warm, leathery skin on my bottom. I was a little surprised that there is no residual pain. I suppose when Mrs. Lion goes back to using more wood than leather, that will change quickly. I have no doubt that she is only warming up, and there is much worse to come. I think that she is still finding her way. Once she starts feeling her oats, I will be in big trouble. Yeah, yeah, I know, I asked for it. I think it will be very good for both of us.

sex update

I have an appointment this afternoon (Tuesday) with the ED specialist. She wants to check my penis to make sure that the injections aren’t causing scar tissue to form. I want to ask her about two issues. The big one is that I haven’t been able to reach orgasm despite Mrs. Lion’s efforts. It’s approaching 80 days now since my last orgasm. The other smaller issue is that my erections get a little painful, almost as though too much blood is inflating my penis. I know that’s not really the issue since I’ve had much firmer erections without any discomfort. It’s probably an issue with the Trimix.

There’s always the option of giving up sex entirely. I suspect that’s what most men do when problems like this come up. If I give up, how can we keep the intimacy we share now? Whether we admit it or not, my sexual problem is affecting other areas of our marriage. I think that Mrs. Lion’s lack of disciplinary enthusiasm may be connected to my sexual issues. I hope we can separate sex from domestic discipline.

They aren’t directly related beyond the rule that when I’m punished, there is no sex that day. Under the surface, there is a pretty strong connection that we need to sever. Long before domestic discipline began, Mrs. Lion spanked me because of my sexual connection with being spanked. Domestic discipline replaced our BDSM spankings with disciplinary ones.

Even though spanking became a punishment, the sexual connection remained. It didn’t affect the quality of our disciplinary marriage. I am severely spanked for infractions. A big reason Mrs. Lion takes on the role of my disciplinary wife is that she knows I want and need her to maintain a strict disciplinary environment. I think that her current ambiguity is based on her concern that if I’m not able to orgasm, my need for strong discipline goes away.

I’m absolutely sure it doesn’t. If anything, my need is stronger because the powerful intimacy of a disciplinary marriage replaces the sex we no longer share. I need our domestic discipline to stay strong and strict. It provides me with a solid foundation while sexual problems continue to disrupt our lives.

By:
In: Spanking

We had a busy weekend. On Saturday, we drove to a farmstand and bought fresh-picked blueberries. Later, I did a Trimix injection that produced a very good erection that stood up even when I was lying down. Mrs. Lion tied my balls and masturbated me with lube. It felt good for a while…then it stopped feeling at all. I noticed that my erection was a little painful like my penis had too much blood in it. I wonder if that was the result of too much Trimix. If she’s up for it, I will try a smaller dose tonight.

We made blueberry jam on Sunday. America’s Test Kitchen has a wonderful recipe (read it here). The recipe only works if you make single, small batches. We had 20 jars of jam after six batches and about five hours of work. We tried the finished jam on English Muffins for breakfast on Monday. It was perfect! The jam is packed with sweet, whole berries. It’s well worth the time and trouble to make.

What didn’t happen was a continuation of Mrs.Lion’s spanking experiments. My bottom has been nowhere near the business end of a paddle since last week. Spanking me is low on Mrs. Lion’s to-do list. Let me correct myself. It’s only low on her list when she hasn’t caught me breaking a rule or annoying her. When that happens, bruising my butt moves near the top of her list.

I can’t argue with that logic. It’s just that we need to get back to our disciplinary activities. We’re both happier when I’m frequently spanked. My last spankings have been very mild by lioness standards. She made me yelp while she spanked me, but there were no lasting effects. I think that means Mrs. Lion needs more practice. These latest “Just Because” spankings were also untimed. In the past, when Mrs. Lion was in “experiment” mode, the spankings were very severe, sometimes worse than when she punished me.

The two mild spankings were enough to help recharge my sexual batteries. Even though I thoroughly dislike being spanked, I know that my interest in sex and attentiveness to my lioness improve if my bottom gets regular attention. I don’t think I’ll ever understand the sexual connection. How can something I hate and sometimes fear, improve my interest in sex? Maybe it’s like the way other people feel about seeing horor and slasher movies. They like being frightened in a safe environment.

Whatever the underlying cause, it’s obvious to both of us that sparing the paddle isn’t good for me. It isn’t the obvious domestic discipline rationalization that a disciplined husband will misbehave unless frequently spanked. That’s silly. We aren’t children. Sure, I occasionally need correction to help me grow. My need for spanking extends beyond being an educational tool. Even though I can’t explain why, I need frequent trips to the spanking bench in order to maintain sexual interest and emotional balance. Mrs. Lion might want to move spanking higher on her to-do list. She’s a very helpful lioness.