Working Together

I started the weekend working on our blog. If I didn’t fuck it up, you should be seeing pages serve up even faster than before. I’m shooting for under two seconds to see a page. I find myself driven deeper and deeper into weird web technology. I won’t bother you with the details. I’ll just say that there is a surprising amount of technology behind this blog. There isn’t too much in front of it.

Mrs. Lion and I tend to circle a subject for a long time before any changes happen. She has her way of processing prospective change. She said she would try to spank me if I interrupted her. She didn’t explicitly call out being a know-it-all or pissing her off in other ways. We’ll have to see.

Even though I write here about new ideas, that doesn’t mean I’m calling the disciplinary shots. I’m not. Mrs. Lion does what she wants. She will try things that I suggest, but that’s as far as my influence goes. The same is true of sex. For example, she agreed to try male chastity and kept me locked in a male chastity device. She started doing it because I asked. She continued because she felt it was working for us.

I don’t think she is very different from most other wives in that respect. They may be convinced to try something, but they won’t keep it up unless it works for them. Extra work is involved when it comes to male chastity or domestic discipline. It takes time to lock and unlock a chastity device. Even if the woman has her husband do it for her, the activity distracts from sexual activity. Spanking is hard work. It takes time and energy to do it.

While many guys roll their eyes at this because they believe male chastity and DD are beneficial to their wives, they are missing a critical point. A loving partnership doesn’t require spanking or orgasm control to work smoothly. Both are “extras” that the male partner requests. If a man has to be locked into a chastity device and driven mad with desire to get him to go down on his wife, guess what? She won’t want him to bother. There is nothing I need to be forced to do if Mrs. Lion wants it.

The same is true of domestic discipline. It’s true that I get punished when I miss a chore or (hopefully) if I annoy Mrs. Lion. That doesn’t mean I need punishment to do these things. It means that I can forget or behave thoughtlessly. If I do, I get spanked because I asked Mrs. Lion to do it. If she had to use her paddle to make me do the right thing, our marriage wouldn’t last. DD provides her a way to clear the slate when I screw up and remind me what  I need to do. It’s what I asked her to do, not what she imposed on me.

The best way to kill male chastity or domestic discipline is to make the practice unpleasant for your partner. Whining and endless references to what you want or expect. It’s no fun to either partner when this happens. It almost guarantees failure. We have a system. I bring up an idea and let Mrs. Lion know about it. If she agrees to try it, I let it go for a while. If I don’t see or feel anything after a few days, I remind her. She’ll tell me if that bothers her, and if it does, I stop. She is in control.

That doesn’t mean that I can never bring up the subject again. I can unless she tells me that she doesn’t want to do whatever I asked. If she follows through on our latest discussion (“Strike Three!“), I will get a strike if she feels pressured. The point is that we have a way to manage my anxiety and her sanity. It works for us.