Subtle Hints

Aside from being a hot, secret kink, wearing a male chastity device actually performs a useful service. I know that those of us who wear one like to think up rationalizations about our desire to be caged. I seriously doubt that any of the women who are acting as our keyholders put much stock into our explanations. The main one is that wearing a male chastity device prevents masturbation. I don’t think many women consider masturbation a serious epidemic that needs a hardware solution. I’d be pretty surprised if many women think about male masturbation at all.

Mrs. Lion apparently didn’t give it a thought before we had our “chastity talk”. That was when I sat down with her and explained that I wanted her to keep me locked in a male chastity device. One of the reasons I cited was to assure her I wouldn’t masturbate on my own. She was surprised when I said that. I asked why. She said that she didn’t know I masturbated at all. I won’t go into the entire story this point, you can read about it in prior posts. The point is that until I brought it up, she never thought about me playing with my penis.

Once I did mention it, she told me in no uncertain terms that she didn’t want me to do that again. I was puzzled. I’ve always thought that jerking off is a harmless way to release male sexual tension. In her mind it was a breach of our marriage vow. It wasn’t a big sacrifice for me. I never really liked jerking off very much. I did it because I was horny and wanted some easy relief. Being locked in a male chastity device was unnecessary to prevent my hand from performing the forbidden act.

Over the years, I spent most of my time locked into a male chastity device. I enjoyed the periodic unlocking, teasing, and eventual ejaculations Mrs. Lion provided. It was a fun game. The bondage aspect of wearing a chastity device remains exciting to me. I never felt any profound connection between my penis and the hardware that rendered it inaccessible to me. In fact, until very recently I considered it unnecessary to support my full-time orgasm control.

A few words about that. Since that fateful conversation in 2013, Mrs. Lion provides 100% of my sexual release. With or without a male chastity device locked on my penis, she has been the only source of release since then. During the last couple of years, I spent a lot of time wild — not wearing a chastity device. This was brought on by medical issues that made wearing one difficult and, when I went to the bathroom, very messy.

Mrs. Lion prefers when I am wild. It’s a lot of trouble for her to unlock and then relock me when she wants sexual access. She’s never seen it as necessary for the sexual control she demands. I get it. I think it’s interesting that Mrs. Lion, who until well into our marriage was a very vanilla lioness, saw no contradiction or even kink in the idea that she and only she could cause me to ejaculate. She had no fantasies about being dominant and controlling me, It didn’t turn her on to think of me in her power. Nevertheless, she thought it completely natural for her and only her to stimulate my penis. Go figure!

Anyway, she made it very clear from the start that she would consider any extracurricular semen production as a form of betrayal; almost cheating. She was unwavering in this perspective. In fact, it’s so important to her that she refused to even consider the idea that if my paws wandered and I got myself off, that she could use a male chastity device to prevent future offenses. She absolutely expects me to honor my commitment to her without any helpful hardware.

In a way this was disappointing. If a male chastity device has any practical value at all, it is to prevent unauthorized sexual access to the penis it locks up. Mrs. Lion absolutely rejects that idea. She also rejects the concept that forced, extended cage wear can be used as a punishment. Her view remains that she locks me in a chastity device because it’s something I want. She refuses to assign it any value in our power exchange.

That’s why she is not a particularly big fan of locking me up. Removing and relocking the chastity device is extra work for her. She finds no benefit to her or to her power exchange with me when I wear it. I’ve been willing to accept that. I think it’s hot to be locked into a chastity device. I never explored why I feel this way until quite recently.

Over the last couple of months I’ve been going through a period of low sexual interest. Mrs. Lion has been unable to push me to the edge of orgasm, or even to orgasm itself most of the time. After more than a week, with enough work, she can get me off. I find this very frustrating. I’ve been wondering if this isn’t some hormonal artifact. Is there something physically wrong with me that manifests itself through my reduced interest in getting off?

During this time, when Mrs. Lion worked gamely to get me to the edge, I felt worse and worse as I watched her struggling as she masturbated me. At one point she decided that maybe I was tired of hand jobs. I was. So, she switched to oral sex. She sucked valiantly until her mouth was too sore to continue. It felt great physically, but made me feel even guiltier.

We bought some mechanical aids: male masturbating machines. They were interesting but didn’t have any better results. I will write a review of them in the near future. The longer this went on the more broken I felt. Since sex is one-way here, Mrs. Lion is uninterested in sex for herself, my loss of the ability to fully enjoy any sexual activity shut down sex in our marriage.

Worse, both of us are sex bloggers. How do a couple of sex bloggers write about something they don’t do anymore? Are we now moving into the realm of fiction writers? I suppose we could do that. I like to write erotic fiction. But that’s hardly the point.

Last fall I contacted the folks that make Evotion chastity devices. I arranged to get a custom Orion device. They have very long lead times on their custom devices. I didn’t receive mine until about two weeks ago. The timing couldn’t have been worse. We were in the midst of my sexual hiatus when the device arrived, I was curious and wanted to try it. I figured that it wouldn’t make anything worse and I wanted to review this very nice 3D-printed male chastity device.

Mrs. Lion agreed to lock it on. We returned to our old routine. I wear the device 24/7. Every day or two Mrs. Lion removes that and teases me. When she’s done, and I’ve lost my erection, the device goes back on. The first few times she did this, it was very difficult for her to get the bits together and locked. That’s not terribly unusual. She’s always had a learning curve when it came to applying chastity devices to my penis.

I had no sexual expectations that wearing a chastity device would change my current, depressing pattern. Why should I? I’m an old timer when it comes to wearing male chastity devices. Yes, I do like new things. I don’t think the sense of novelty is enough to completely flip my sexual switch.

Maybe I was wrong. Ever since wearing the device, I’ve become much more sexually responsive. When Mrs. Lion unlocks me, I’m on the way to an erection before she can put the hardware down on the nightstand. I’m completely hard seconds after she starts masturbating me. The first time she unlocked me, after a very long run-up, I did get to the edge. Not only that, she was able to edge me over and over just like the old days.

The next night I was equally responsive, but plateaued after about 15 minutes of energetic masturbation and began to lose my erection. Not everything changed. I was pretty sad about that. I think that maybe the fact that Mrs. Lion started very late contributed to my problem, but it didn’t cause it.

The revelation I’ve had about wearing a male chastity device is that its effect on me is unrelated to most of the things I thought were important. It has nothing to do with the fact that my penis is inaccessible to me, or that I have no way to get free at even if I want to. It has nothing to do with the fact that I can’t get an erection while wearing the cage. The benefit is more subtle and far more profound. When the cage is locked on my penis, I know on all levels that there is no point in being sexually aroused.

Sure, I can see something that turns me on and maybe my penis will try to get hard inside the cage. Of course it can’t. More importantly, I know that no matter how much I like the idea of being hard and ready to come, that’s not going to happen until the devices removed. Wearing a chastity device is a form of conditioning. It’s no different than the kind of conditioning I get when I’m punished for breaking a rule.

It’s a simple cause and effect relationship. Spill food on my shirt and I get a sore bottom from a spanking. One clearly causes the other. Over time, on every level I learn this relationship. I also learn to avoid spilling food on my shirt and thereby avoid spanking. The chastity device does something very similar. Over the long period of time I’ve worn one, I’ve learned that I can’t have any sex as long as it’s present. When it’s unlocked and removed, I may be able to get sexual arousal and occasionally ejaculate.

The important piece of information is that the window for sexual expression is very clearly defined when I wear a chastity device. I am physically unable to have sex while the device is on. I am able to have sex when it’s been removed. During times that I’ve been allowed to go wild, that cause-and-effect relationship is suspended. My penis may be unrestrained, but I knew I couldn’t have sex unless Mrs. Lion decided to give me some. You could argue that it’s no different when I wear the chastity device.

It is for me. Chastity device forces a sort of ceremony on us. Any sexual activity is always preceded by an overture that consists of Mrs. Lion fetching the keys, unlocking the device and removing it from my penis. Once that is done, sex commences. When sex is over, the device goes back on and is locked. I didn’t realize how powerful this message is. Even when I am unlocked and allowed to shower, I know that the fact that it’s been removed from my penis means something sexy is going to happen. As long as it’s locked on me, I know there is absolutely no possibility I will get any sexual pleasure.

That’s why I asked Mrs. Lion if she is going to unlock me. I don’t ask her if she is going to jerk me off or do something else sexual. I’m not being coy. I want to know if the music’s going to start to play that inevitably leads to those incredible feelings when she stimulates my penis. It turns out that for me wearing a male chastity device is a sexual traffic signal. When it’s locked on, the signal is red. Nothing sexual is going to happen. When it’s unlocked, we have either a yellow or a green. That means sex is either coming right now or will probably be coming very soon.

I guess I’m a simple critter. I’ve been trained to only expect sex when my chastity device has been unlocked and removed. I don’t ask for sex. I just ask if I’m going to be unlocked. I do like it when Mrs. Lion lets me remain wild. But I think it causes me a problem. I’ve lost my sexual traffic signal. If I’m going to be unlocked for any period of time, I think we need some other way for me to understand when it is or isn’t time for sexual fun. That could sound odd I know, but all those years of being locked in a male chastity device has conditioned me to need explicit signals. If I’m going to be locked permanently, we have no need for other signals. But if Mrs. Lion is going to want me wild for any amount of time, we need to understand the rules of the road.

What do you think?