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In: Mrs Lion Comments

It’s raining right now, but we’re supposed to get very cold temperatures starting tonight. They are forecasting the lowest temperatures in a decade. We normally stay in the forties during the winter, but once a year, we get a cold snap. We’ll get snow that we would have laughed at in New York. Four inches? Is that all? We may shovel it, but we may also just get in the car and go to work. Here, four inches of snow paralyzes entire cities. I assume the stores are out of milk and bread and every other commodity needed if people are holed up until March. Of course, some of the shelves were already empty because of supply issues.

When we lived in our other house, we knew what to expect. We’d lived there long enough to know that branches, if not whole trees, would be down. The power would probably go out. Our road was a tertiary road, at best, and wouldn’t get plowed. We’ve only lived here for two years. It’s a crapshoot what to expect. Our town is tiny, but our road is fairly well-traveled. It will certainly be mashed down into a drivable surface if it doesn’t get plowed. The power may go out, but since the population is clustered together, it probably won’t be out for days. Still, it’s nice that we have a generator. Thankfully, the dog’s food was delivered, so she’s all set. We have treats. Lion and I have enough food and treats of our own, so we’re all set—just one small, happy family.

Lion thought he was horny yesterday. The dog has been acting crazier than usual. By the time he dealt with her jumping on him, he was no longer in the mood. Stupid dog. He suggested we start our activities earlier in the day. Even if the dog goes nutso, we still have a shot at some quality Lion time. Sounds good to me. It can snow and get cold outside all it wants. Bring on the erection!

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In: Sex
Deck the balls…

Merry Christmas! A sex blog on Christmas is a little like being naked in church. It’s not exactly the day most people are thinking about the stuff we usually write about. Sex has been on my mind. It felt a little out of place, so I listened to Christmas music. It didn’t work. My mind is definitely below the waist.

The winter solstice has been celebrated for thousands of years. The early Christian church conveniently moved Jesus’ birthday to coincide with it. According to historians, he was born in spring or summer. The church has always been willing to steal holidays from older religions. Christmas is probably the most egregious.

Nevertheless, whatever religion you prefer, this time of year is celebrated. Some believe that the reason for this is that the short days and long, cold nights are depressing. A little fun is in order. I subscribe to that. In fact, this is a perfect time to grant wishes. Most guys who read this blog are probably wishing for a way to get their penises locked into a chastity device. Those who are already locked might enjoy a holiday wank.

The gift of sex is always appropriate. It’s free and easy to wrap and unwrap. Remember, it’s the thought that counts. When it comes to sex, the thought might be applied to coming up with a new way to deliver pleasure. Maybe it’s something you haven’t done in a long time. Maybe it is brand new. Remember, oral sex is always appreciated. No, not for the mailman, please.

An orgasm warms a long, cold winter night. One delivered in a new way is a wonderful thing to find under the tree, so to speak. I can hear Mrs. Lion singing, “Deck the balls with lots of clothespins. Fa, la, la, la, la.” That isn’t my holiday wish; just a thought. I have to admit it’s festive.

However you spend the holiday, I hope you are with people you love and have fun—Merry Christmas from the Lions.

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In: Mrs Lion Comments

Lion has an appointment with his eye doctors this afternoon. On the one hand, it worked out well since I had the day off. On the other hand, who wants to go to any doctor on Christmas eve? There’s a one hundred percent chance we’ll have to wait hours. Lion will get frustrated after a half hour. He’ll say he’s leaving. I’ll point out that I have the car keys, so he’s not going anywhere. And a happy Christmas to all.

I have no idea when we’ll get home. Traffic could be impossible coming out of Seattle and heading east. It makes me laugh when the news tries to tell everyone when the worst traffic will be, and they should leave between X and Y. Well, now everyone will leave between X and Y, and traffic will be bad then too. Meanwhile, we just want to go thirty miles to get home.

I assume Lion wasn’t horny last night. [Lion — I was but didn’t want to appear needy.] I moved over, and the only thing he said was that he needed to move up on the bed. With our adjustable bed, we both tend to slide down. If we put the feet up a little, we shouldn’t slide down as much, but it’s not always comfortable. I told Lion we didn’t need to do anything. I was just coming over for a snuggle. For all I know, he was waiting for me, and I was waiting for him to mention something about sex or horniness. Neither one of us said a word, so nothing happened. Depending on how tired we are after waiting for the doctors and the drive home, maybe nothing will happen tonight.

We’re in for some frigid temperatures around here. I’m sure we’ll spend a lot of the time snuggling under the blankets. Good thing that’s one of our favorite things to do. And when we snuggle, my hands tend to wander. And then things tend to heat up. Maybe the cold isn’t such a bad thing after all.

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In: Hand Jobs

Our recent posts (“Pulling The Lion’s “Tail,” “Maybe I Am a Prude,” “In Praise Of Handjob,” and “An Edged Lion is a Happy Lion”) talk about various aspects of handjobs, a woman masturbating a man. This rather harmless activity turns out to be heavily nuanced and more profound than I first thought. My first reaction to the idea of a woman masturbating me is that it is a nice thing to do that makes me feel good. There’s much more going on.

First, women have very different views on the subject. Some worry that if they handle a penis, its owner will want to penetrate them. Touching a penis is foreplay. Sure, it can be. Taking that position makes handling the male sex organ a sort of commitment to intercourse. That certainly restricts the desire to touch one.

Other women use it as a sort of sexual pressure release valve. If the male is getting too” friendly” a few minutes of penis massage will reduce his ardor. This use of the handjob is particularly popular with teenage girls. It’s an easy way to avoid an uncomfortable situation. Both approaches are female methods of increasing or decreasing the possibility of more intimate activity. I think they are valid and useful. I have always been happy with a woman using this tool for sexual management.

The problem is that this approach to a penis overlooks an obviously good use of one. A penis is a toy that most men will share. If this sounds too trivial, consider how males are different from females—for example, sex in terms of ejaculation isn’t an end game. Unlike women, who often believe vaginal activity is an emotional as well as a physical experience, men approach it very differently.

Most men masturbate (jerk off) from an early age. There is a tacit understanding that boys do it frequently. It provides physical release and theoretically frees us from pressuring our dates. Jerking off isn’t an expression of love or commitment. It’s often not very important—It’s release. We are playing with our toys. It feels good.

Inside a relationship or friendship, it isn’t hard to include handjobs that aren’t green lights to intercourse. A man already understands that ejaculation isn’t necessarily an expression of romantic love. If the woman makes it clear that playing with the penis is just for fun and isn’t romantic sex, we will understand and happily share our toy.

If a man, like me, for example, likes to bottom, a handjob is an excellent activity to demonstrate female dominance. Doing this requires no equipment or training. Simply have him undress and play with your toy. Mrs. Lion has made it clear that the penis attached to me is her toy. It isn’t mine. She can play with it any time she wants. It isn’t mine, so I can’t.

Since it’s her toy, she can tease me and make me believe that I will come, but stop before I get the chance. Or, she can masturbate me with others watching. She can also let a friend play with her toy. Mrs. Lion chooses to play with her toy when we are alone, and she doesn’t like to share. It’s her choice.

The idea that a penis is a toy works in vanilla contexts too. As soon as a woman disconnects the idea that playing with a penis is an invitation to intercourse, the couple can enjoy a fun toy. Many women don’t consider masturbating a man as sex (for them). It’s an amusing activity that makes her man happy. Take off the emotional weight and have a good time. You’ll have a hard time finding a man who won’t share his toy with you.