heavy rubber spanking paddles
New rubber spanking paddles. Both are made from nearly 1-inch thick conveyor belt material. They are very heavy. Lion definitely won’t like these. I wonder why he ordered them. (Click here for purchasing information)

Last week we got two new paddles. They’re heavy rubber and smell like tires. I left them on the deck for a few days to out-gas. They weathered a few days of heavy rain. I put them in the main bathroom so they could dry and that’s where they’ve stayed.

Not that I need an occasion to test out a new paddle, but Lion has given me one. I almost said he “thoughtfully” gave me one, but if he had been thinking he wouldn’t be getting punished. I know the days all blend in together when you’re home but he’s been working. He should know what day of the week it is. By afternoon I realized he hadn’t reminded me of punishment day. Of course, I’m not going to say anything because he has till 8:30 pm to do it. Around dinner time I remembered again. Still, he had a few hours. The next time I remembered was 11 as I was putting drops in his eyes.

When I told him of his error, his face went blank. He had an “oh shit” moment and then admitted he forgot entirely. Sometimes he remembers things in the middle of doing something else and forgets to tell me. We both do that. For days I tried to remember to make his scones. (I finally made them. Blueberry yumminess, according to Lion.) But this time he completely forgot. I could see he was trying to figure out how he could have forgotten something that’s been in effect for so long. Saturdays are a much more recent addition to the punishment schedule, but Mondays and Thursdays have been in effect forever.

A little while later, I forgot to set a timer between drops. Lion asked if his remembering the timer negated forgetting about punishment day. Ha ha! Nice try, my pet. No. One of those new paddles will be broken in on your buns this afternoon.


  1. Author

    I used the one with the holes. I told Lion the holes would help with wind resistance and allow me to swing faster. 😉

  2. If he doesn’t remember these things by now, he never will. You should just forget about the “offense” of remembering punishment day snd just schedule the beating he would inevitably get. You’d think he’d just give up trying to remember, and even when you remember, you lie on wait and purposely avoid reminding him so you get to punish him.

    1. Author

      Do you ever play games? Do you ever lose a game? If you do maybe you should just forget about playing and admit defeat right now. If you can’t figure out how to win every time, what good is playing?

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