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In: Lion's Journal, Male Chastity, Sex

I’ve noticed that sometimes I puzzle Mrs. Lion with my choices. Yesterday she commented on the fact that while I was doing much more around the house, I didn’t want her to reward me with less days till my next orgasm. The reason I have pitched in more is that she is working extra hours and if I get home before her, I can handle the laundry and dinner so she has a chance to relax after her long day.

I think other aspects of my behavior as a caged male are also puzzling to my keyholder. The first thing that comes to mind is why I would want to be locked up in the first place. I know that Mrs. Lion understands that I like her to be in sexual control and she also knows I love being restrained, but I think there is some confusion as to exactly why this particular set of activities are so exciting to me. I’m not sure I fully understand why either. I can say that I really like that we are doing this. I don’t always like being locked up. That doesn’t mean I want to run wild. It just means that sometimes I don’t like the little irritations, the difficulty peeing, or I am just grumpy and want to grumble. The biggest turn on to me is that I don’t have control. I like that I can hate being locked up and hate being horny and really hate peeing erratically and yet I still have to remain in my cage.  This sends the unmistakable message to me that I am not in control and it doesn’t matter how I feel about being locked up. That is my condition and it isn’t going to change. That’s the real turn on!

What about waiting? Mrs. Lion knows I love sex and I love to have orgasms. So why would I ask her to restrict me from such pleasure? This is a much more complex issue. In part, making me wait is another, very powerful way for Mrs. Lion to demonstrate her control. After all, the main reason to lock my penis in a cage is to remove my ability to decide when I will orgasm. The only way to demonstrate this control is to prevent me from coming when I really want to.

Some say that males who are prevented from ejaculating change and become more domestic and more focused on their partner’s satisfaction. That’s not true in my case. I am always interested in Mrs. Lion’s happiness and satisfaction. I’m not very domestic, but I have always done my share around the house. It’s only fair. So, in my case, at least, making me wait shouldn’t be a tool to get me to do the things I should do anyway. Some males have strong fantasies about losing the ability to come and being required to turn into domestic, subservient, sexless beings who serve their keyholders. I don’t share those fantasies.

Mrs. Lion seemed surprised that I wasn’t particularly interested in earning time off from my current 11 day wait. I don’t think I am saying that I will never be interested in earning an early release, just that right now I am ok with my 11 day sentence. Also, Mrs. Lion has never extended my wait for any reason. It seems to me that the knife should cut both ways. Maybe on some level I see “earning” time off as a way of topping from the bottom. However, if Mrs. Lion regularly extended my waits as needed and reduced them when deserved, then earning time off could be fun.

Another area that seems confusing to her is teasing and edging. Why in the world would I want Mrs. Lion to push me to the edge of orgasm over and over and then lock me up unsatisfied? I can see how this might appear cruel. It certainly violates something most women learn when teens; you don’t tease a cock unless you plan to finish the job. There are two distinct reasons why I want to be teased this way: First, it is a way to show me who is in control. No matter how badly I want to come, I am not allowed that extra second of stimulation. Second, being brought to the edge also takes me 99% of the way to an orgasm. I get to experience the building arousal and excitement and I feel myself losing control and getting ready to ejaculate. I love that. In fact, some people consider edging as the male equivalent of  female multiple orgasms. I wouldn’t go that far, but I do enjoy it. Of course, I pay for it later. I am left wishing I could have that extra 1% and my general horniness is increased for a day or two.

I think that understanding why I want what we are doing is a powerful weapon for Mrs. Lion. A keyholder that understands why her caged male wants things and also understands that he loves to hate other things, provides her with the ability to offer a deeper and more fulfilling experience for her caged male. More importantly, she can see that what she is doing is not cruel; it’s exactly what her caged male wants. They say that knowledge is power. This is certainly true in forced male chastity.

By:
In: Advice for a new keyholder, Keyholder, Keyholder101, Lion's Journal, Male Control (training), Sex

Wednesday night Mrs. Lion unlocked me and did some very intense teasing. She brought me to the edge and then paused just long enough for me to come down a bit — maybe ten or fifteen seconds — and then resumed masturbating me to the edge again. She repeated this quite a few times. She didn’t push hard enough to risk a ruined orgasm, but made sure I was ready to come each time. It was very exciting. All week since my last orgasm I was feeling mellow and had no real urgency about coming again. Last night changed all that. Now I really want release. Of course I won’t get it until Saturday; well maybe Friday since that is our anniversary.

The technique Mrs. Lion used is very interesting. I have had some experience with it in the past. I know others who have also experienced it. Bringing a male to the edge of orgasm over and over with very short pauses between stimulation can, if done enough times, make it impossible for the male to orgasm. When it happened to me, at one point I just knew that no matter how much more stimulation I got, I would never come.

This is very useful to the top/keyholder. At that point the male is extremely aroused and hard and can safely be used for intercourse or any other sexual activity without the risk of unauthorized orgasm. As long as the stimulation continues, this condition will persist. In my college days when I tried pot, I discovered that smoking pot allowed me to get super aroused, but I was unable to orgasm. That is the main reason my pot experimentation ended quickly.

When you are done playing, a few hours of rest will restore his ability to orgasm. I’m sure the first question a keyholder will ask about this interesting phenomenon is how to know when the male has lost his ability to orgasm? The easiest way is to observe the male. While you are stimulating him he will start to look frustrated and you will not see the usual signs he is almost ready to come. Like edging, some practice and good observation skills will let you learn when he has been defused.

This is almost the ideal form of chastity sex play. The male is very aroused and no matter how much stimulation he gets, he can’t orgasm. The first time this was done to me, the top got me to this point and then told me that I could jerk off and come. I worked and worked at it until my cock was getting sore. I just couldn’t orgasm. If you do this with your male, once he experiences this, he will start reacting when he senses he is near the point where he can’t come. It’s massively frustrating.

I never suspected that my body would react this way. It’s like a circuit breaker in the brain is tripped. I always expected I would lose my erection and interest in sex if I lost my ability to orgasm, but that isn’t how it works. It didn’t hurt or feel bad, just wouldn’t build to ejaculation.

Like many advanced forms of play, this kind of edging takes time. It requires repeating edging until the circuit breaker trips. This can take a half hour or more. Persistence will pay off. It also may fail the first few times. It is likely that some ruined orgasms can result from over stimulation. Like any technique it requires a lot of practice.

Since this only happened to me once or twice, I have no idea if it is possible to train a male so that it becomes easier to get him into this orgasm-proof state. I wonder if this form of play is something that appeals to keyholders. I read an account by one who truly enjoyed her male in that state. I think that caged males will like this play. It is almost the ultimate form of chastity play. Let us know what you think and what you learn when you try it.

By:
In: Advice for a new keyholder, Advice to caged males, Keyholder101, Lion's Journal, Sex

Strictly speaking, anal play has no direct relationship to male chastity. However, when we open the Pandora’s box of caging our cocks, we also open other kinky topics as well. I have mixed feelings about anal play. I really like the idea of Mrs. Lion training me to take butt plugs, dildos, and her hand. It turns me on to think about her doing this to me. When we actually play, I rarely find it arousing and frequently uncomfortable. I think that is part of the appeal. It’s like spanking. I love to hate it. There is a silver lining. As I am better trained, the discomfort will become arousal, I think. For example, I now find the Njoy plug comfortable to accept and hold.

There are a few things I have learned about anal play that I would like to share. The first is for caged males. Anal play is not gay sex. Everyone, male and female, has a large number of nerve endings in the anal area. Stimulation of this area can be sexually arousing. Most men have experienced a finger up there while their partner was giving them oral sex. Once you get over the surprise, it really feels hot. So, keep an open mind.

Second, hygiene is very important. Your partner will probably not enjoy dealing with a smelly butt. Cleaning is easy. The anus is largely self cleaning. All you have to do is make sure the exterior areas are nice and  clean. There is no substitute for washing. Either a shower or a soapy washcloth in your crack will ensure your keyholder will have a good experience. The second issue is a bit delicate. The primary function of the anus and colon is excretion. That means there is a good chance some poop is being stored up there. Generally, poop is not down in the lower eight or ten inches of the colon, but it is possible some will be there. This creates two challenges: The first is that it hurts when an object is inserted and pushes poop back up. In my experience, most of my discomfort is caused by this. Second, when the toy comes out, there could be poop on the end of it. You and your keyholder need to be aware of this and provide a paper towel or something to put the toy on until you wash it. By the way, silicone toys can be boiled or run through the dishwasher for extra sanitation.

When Mrs. Lion and I started playing years ago, she began each session by administering a disposable enema to me. Disposables don’t put a lot of fluid up there and are not uncomfortable. Holding it for about fifteen minutes and then taking the time to let everything out eliminated mess on the toys and my discomfort from a toy hitting poop. You don’t have to do this. Just keep it in mind if you are finding insertions uncomfortable or messy.

The keys to comfortable insertion are lube and insertion speed. Most anal pain from toys is caused by lack of adequate lubrication. Use a good lube and plenty of it. We use Boy Butter. It’s inexpensive and long lasting. Use plenty. If during insertion, things get painful, withdraw the object and add more lube. Chances are very good that will cure the problem. Speed of insertion is also key. Slow and steady wins this race. If it starts to get too uncomfortable during insertion, back off a bit (remove an inch or so of the object) and hold it there. Then begin again. Don’t give up or stop. Just take your time. It is important to make it clear by your actions that your male will be anally trained.

What if he just can’t accept the object? If you are convinced he just can’t do it, you have two choices: You can remove the object and give him a rest. Let him know you will resume the next day. He needs to know that the object will be up his ass sooner or later. The second alternative is to remove the object and insert a smaller one if you have it.

The key to anal training, or any training for that matter, is to always reach your goal. If you want to peg your male and he agreed that you should, then nothing should prevent you from reaching that goal. It may take time because he needs to learn to accept objects and then learn to handle the fucking motion. That’s fine. What isn’t fine is abandoning your plan. A key to caged male happiness that is frequently overlooked is that your male needs consistency and the sure knowledge that if you say that he will learn or do something, that nothing will stop that from happening. That doesn’t mean you need to be abusive by forcing painful objects up his ass. It means that you will do whatever it takes to eventually reach your goal.

Being caged puts the male in a dependent position. Just as with a child or pet, the caged male needs to know that if you say something will happen, then it will. This knowledge, whether he knows it or not, will bring comfort and contentment.

Not every couple will want to embark on anal play. I’m glad that Mrs. Lion is training me.  Give it a try. You may like it too.

By:
In: Male Chastity, Sex

It’s only been a few days since my last orgasm and I am already feeling frustrated and horny. I had always assumed that my desire for sex grew as the time since my last orgasm stretched out. This is, of course, true. But it isn’t uniform. Mrs. Lion and I had an intense, fun playtime on Sunday. I was massively horny on Monday and the feeling keeps growing. I woke up this morning with a chubby that took over fifteen minutes to subside. Clearly Mrs. Lion is doing something right.

She has been much more active in my anal training. Last night she inserted the Njoy plug and I wore it for three hours. It wasn’t very uncomfortable going in and for most of the three hours it felt fine. I don’t like the feeling when Mrs. Lion removes it, but that isn’t surprising and it is a very brief bit of discomfort.

During our Sunday play, Mrs. Lion pegged me with the Clone-a-Willie copy of my cock. I haven’t reached the point where I actually enjoy it, but I did start to feel like I wanted to pee. That sensation is usually caused by prostate stimulation. It could be that the dildo was massaging my prostate and if kept up, I might have been milked. I think that was the last thing either of us wanted at the time. It was my orgasm day and I would have been disappointed if I were milked instead.

I have long wondered about prostate milking. We have tried it on many occasions with no real result. Maybe the lion dildo is the key to success. From what I’ve read, if the semen is milked out by stimulating the prostate, the male loses sexual interest the same way he would if given an orgasm. Popular lore says that this technique can be used for just that purpose.

I’ve noticed that my language has changed a bit since being locked up. In the past, I’ve always referred to my orgasms as, “having an orgasm”. Now, since sexual control has been surrendered, I say “given an orgasm.” I think it is subconscious recognition that I no longer own my orgasms. I can only have one if Mrs. Lion gives it to me. This is much more significant than it might seem at first look.

For example, milking used to be something that piqued my curiosity. I still wonder about it, but wouldn’t even consider trying to stimulate myself. Like orgasms, I no longer feel they are mine to “have” or “take”. Another change is my feelings about corrective spankings. Often, if I break a rule like eating before Mrs. Lion or interrupting her, she will give me a couple of hard swats with a paddle. In the past I considered those swats as a brief, fun activity. Now, I find myself really trying not to break a rule. I don’t think it is the swats as much as some internal switch has been thrown that makes me want to obey more. I think that if Mrs. Lion were to increase the number of swats to the point I really hate those corrective spankings, I might improve even more.

So what do corrective spankings have to do with milking and anal play? The answer, I think, is that these activities send very clear control messages to my brain. Both are physical activities. They are done to me without my participation. Milking, while not discipline, is an intense activity that takes my ability to orgasm away and puts me in a very vulnerable position. Anal play is another activity that doesn’t require my participation or cooperation and involves some discomfort. Corrective spanking is the most direct form of physical control. Unlike the “fun” spankings that I love to hate, corrective spanking  not only hurts, but also forcibly reminds me that I have done something wrong.

Since forced male chastity, to me, is about control, any activity that makes me helpless or dependent meets my desire to feel Mrs. Lion’s control. For me, chastity doesn’t have to be about long waits to orgasm. Mrs. Lion could give me an orgasm every day (not too fond of that) and still satisfy my need to be controlled.

I’m discovering that over the last six months, I am no longer “playing” at being sexually controlled. I am sexually controlled and without consciously  realizing it, I am being trained by Mrs. Lion.