By:
In: CBT

Sometimes big things sneak up on you. We had planned on taking our huge camper to the Oregon border for five days of vacation next week. Because Oregon is experiencing a surge in COVID-19 cases, we decided to err on the side of safety and cancel the trip. That got me thinking about how our lives have changed since March.

We are not terribly social creatures. We don’t go to parties, nightclubs, many movies, or even out to eat very often. So, the two of us being home all the time didn’t feel very different. As time went by, the differences started to become more obvious. We did go out to dinner once or twice a week pre-pandemic. Obviously, we aren’t doing that anymore. Our hair grows, well mine does. Mrs. Lion has long hair that doesn’t need trimming. Mine does. Just like the pioneers, Mrs. Lion trimmed my hair at home. She did a very good job.

It’s time for another haircut and that’s what got me thinking. We’ve become very self-sufficient. Thanks to the Internet and 300 channels of satellite TV, we don’t want for entertainment. We also stay connected to the outside world. Mrs. Lion is a very good cook. She’s learned to make rather complex meals thanks to the three-or-four-kit meals we get every week via UPS. Almost all of our shopping is done via the Internet and delivery.

Mrs. Lion has returned to work at her office. She has a more normal social life now. I’m still on furlough and at home. I suppose I can pretend we live in a log cabin in the foothills of the Cascade Mountains. All of that statement is true except for the log cabin part. We actually live in a 1940’s bungalow that we rent. It sits on a small piece of land surrounded by other similar vintage little houses. I suppose it’s a typical Western Washington community.

Even though our universe is fairly narrow, change seems to be a regular part of our lives. We’ve been evolving sexually for over seven years now. This blog chronicles the twists and turns of our sex life. The most recent incarnation is the attachment of “payments” for sexual activity. Mrs. Lion is a little bit uncertain about this idea but is willing to give it a try. The way it works is that she does something to me, generally prescribed by a card I pick out of our Box O’ Fun. Sometimes she can just skip the card and decide for herself what has to happen.

One way or another, something generally uncomfortable happens to me. Being as kinky as I am, I find it is as arousing as it is disagreeable. For example, on Friday night Mrs. Lion liberally buttered my balls with a very potent menthol gel. Most of those products sneak up on me. She will apply them and they will feel cool and somewhat refreshing. Then a minute or more later, I feel he’d building up until my balls feel like they are on fire. The stuff she used on Friday felt cool going on, but seconds later it felt like she was aiming a blowtorch at my nether region.

She also applied some to the tip of my penis so that it would touch my urethra. She tried some under the head as well. She reasoned that those are sensitive areas and should be “interesting”. What a sweetheart! I didn’t feel either. In the past, she has tried applying her nasty stuff to my penis. Generally, the sensation was considerably milder than on my balls. I suspect she would have had more success on my urethra if she had wiped it dry first. I think the natural secretions protected me. God bless those secretions!

Generally speaking, my penis seems to be less sensitive to pain than other parts of me. That makes sense. Mother nature wants it to go into potentially uncomfortable places, like a dry vagina, in order to reproduce. If it was very sensitive to pain, it might not stay nice and erect to do its job if there was a little sand or other comfort-robbing substance on it.

Even though I was very close to tears from the burn, my turncoat penis stayed hard and happy. Fortunately for me, my pioneer lioness took mercy on me and let me wash off as much of the menthol as I could. For the record, it doesn’t all come off when you wash it. The burn may be reduced but it goes on for the full 10 or 15 minutes it would if it wasn’t soaped and rinsed. Mrs. Lion knows that too.

If I want some sexual fun tonight, I’m going to have to pick another card. I still have my do-over card so I can protect myself, at least temporarily, from some of the more horrible fates that lie inside that evil box.

By:
In: CBT

We may have finally worked out an exciting and doable nightly ritual. We sort of stumbled on it. When Mrs. Lion brought out the Box O’ Fun almost every night it started us both thinking. The box has cards in it with various activities written on them. Most of the activities involve a certain level of sexual discomfort for me. They range from wearing a butt plug to Icy Hot on my balls and perineum to various sorts of clothespins applied to my nether regions. I think there’s even one or two for spanking. You get the idea.

lion's box of penalties
This is the Box O’Fun. Very few penalties are left. Most have already been picked. The worst are still in there.

After I go through the activity I pick from the Box, Mrs. Lion sexually stimulates me. Since I am under orgasm control, most of the time the stimulation ends before I can ejaculate. That’s fine. She also stimulates me and keeps me very hard and excited while I’m suffering through the activity of the day.

We’ve been doing this for about a week. It occurred to me that in order for me to get sexual fun, I needed to pick a card from the Box and suffer through the activity. My “reward” was being edged or at least teased. I wrote about this yesterday. Mrs. Lion picked it up too. In fact, on Thursday night I picked a card to get menthol rub applied wherever she’d like. That always includes my balls and perineum. I was tired and not feeling particularly interested in sex. I asked her to put it off. She agreed. We also ended up with a longer-term understanding. Here’s what it is:

in order for me to get Mrs. Lion to play with my penis, I must first pick a card from the Box. Then, Mrs. Lion would perform the activity on the card. If for any reason I didn’t want to do that activity, I could postpone it. I wouldn’t get any sexual stimulation until I had that particular card’s content done to me. I could also decide not to pick a card at all; no card no sex. Mrs. Lion agreed to offer me this opportunity at least six out of seven nights a week. It was strictly up to me if anything happened on any particular night.

That’s it. If I want sex, I have to pay the toll. Since I have the right to postpone, Mrs. Lion is free to pick activities she knows are particularly unpleasant for me. She has been doing a little research. In her post yesterday,”Derailed Plans” she mentioned that I had blue menthol rub coming. That stuff can be very nasty when applied to my balls and perineum. I had picked that card on Thursday night and elected to postpone. If she adds the Icy Hot roll-on, to the box, I can see postponing in my future. That particular product has the maximum amount of menthol in it and burns like crazy.

I know that it is not her objective to make my choices unpleasant enough to force me to postpone indefinitely. She likes teasing me. There are other possibilities to use the box. For example, the toll for oral sex could be higher. Perhaps I need to receive two cards to get that. If we did the drawing early enough, Mrs. Lion could add Zaperdy to the box. We discussed how to make that game more “interesting”.

The way we’ve played up till now, I can elect not to answer a question. If I don’t answer one, I don’t get zapped. If I answer one incorrectly, Mrs. Lion zaps me. We discussed making a little change: If I don’t answer a question, I get one zap. If I answer one incorrectly, I get two. That would certainly add a great deal more “interest”. She could also play a variant of the game where instead of zaps, I get spanks. We just keep track of how many no-answers and wrong answers I do. At the end of the show, I get one swat for every failure to answer and two for every incorrect one. Just a thought.

The idea of me having to “pay” for sex makes sense to me. Aside from the fact that I like BDSM, it also kind of levels the playing field for us. I always feel a little bad that Mrs. Lion doesn’t want sex for herself. I feel selfish when I want it for me. The idea of having to do something that isn’t so wonderful in order to get sex for me somehow seems a little bit less one-sided.

By:
In: CBT

Mrs. Lion has been really good about offering me the Box O’ Fun. Every night she has been putting it on the bed and then asks me if I want to pick a card. So far, I’ve agreed each time. I’ve wondered if I didn’t want to pick a card, would I not get the sexual attention that follows the penalty I pick from the box. That would be fair. I just don’t know if Mrs. Lion has considered this. It would be sort of a sexual toll.

I still have a do-over card to avoid one of my selections from the box. I’m being careful about what I choose to use it for. Of course, if I elect to skip that penalty, it just goes back in the box so that sooner or later it will happen. On Wednesday night I picked, “Blindfold – Pick Another Card”. The second card I picked was for the dreaded Velcro.

Mrs. Lion made sure I was unable to see anything and then proceeded to tightly wrap a piece of that nasty Velcro around my soft penis. Then she began playing with it. As I got harder I could feel the pressure growing from the Velcro around the base of my cock. That’s not the worst of it. Once I was erect, she slowly began removing the Velcro tie. I could hear the crackle as the hooks pulled off of the loops in the fabric. I knew that soon I would feel the nasty jolt of blood surging into my penis. Sure enough, the Velcro came off with a pop and I let out a soft scream. That really hurts! (Picture)

Mrs. Lion then played with other Velcro strips around my hard penis. She puts the hook-side toward my skin; it feels a little like sandpaper. It is definitely not terribly comfortable. She put a number of strips around it being sure to leave that sensitive area near the tip available for her fingers. She used her fingers to keep me as hard as possible while I got to “enjoy” those nasty little hooks. Finally, she removed all the strips and began giving me a handjob. I was responsive for a while but then my erection faded. I guess it was just a little too soon after my orgasm two days ago.

Once we were done playing, we chatted about what happened. We both realized that it would be more interesting if Mrs. Lion didn’t tell me what was on the second card. Since I was blindfolded, I would have no way to know what was going to happen to me until she began the action. We decided that it would probably be more fun.

I had a really good time. I have to admit that as the number of cards in the box dwindles, I worry more and more that those tiny dollhouse clothespins will soon be attached to the head of my penis. Ouch! If I’m nice and hard when she starts, I will probably remain hard with a little encouragement as she adds those very painful little pins. At least I was in the past. My record to date is two clothespins on the edge of the head of my penis (picture). Who knows, maybe Mrs. Lion will go for a new record.

By:
In: Spanking, Lion's Journal

Tuesday night was quiet. That’s normal since we don’t usually do anything the night after I ejaculate. Both of us slept fairly well on Tuesday night. I had been having a lot of trouble getting to sleep and on many nights ended up watching TV until 3 AM. Tuesday night I went to bed with Mrs. Lion and fell asleep promptly. Yesterday, I finally got to go into Seattle to get a steroid shot in my shoulder. It’s long overdue, but thanks to the demonstrations we haven’t been able to get downtown.

I realize that I have been writing a lot about spanking lately. I think it’s because our disciplinary relationship is maturing and I’m beginning to understand how it works. That may sound odd. But the fact of the matter is that something that seems as simple as introducing spanking punishment into a marriage turns out to be substantially more complicated.

Surfing for spanking

Since I’m not working, I’ve had a chance to do a lot of web surfing. My most recent objective has been to understand how other couples incorporate domestic discipline into their lives. I am excluding the religiously-based practice since that comes from a completely different perspective. As far as I can tell, it turns out that all male-spanking domestic discipline originates with the male partner. This is exactly the same as it is with male chastity. In almost all cases the man asks his wife to lock up his penis or, for domestic discipline, spank him.

That’s what happened with us. I asked Mrs. Lion to lock me in a chastity device and then a couple of years later asked her to spank me for discipline. There is a strong parallel between the way male chastity and domestic discipline worked their way into our marriage. Both started as Mrs. Lion accommodating a sexual need of mine. Chastity was a new one on her when I asked. She knows that I like BDSM and we’ve done that sort of play on a fairly regular basis since we’ve been together. But I never asked her to control my sexual release.

She is a very good sport and did her best to accommodate my request. It didn’t take her long to completely understand what I wanted and implement total orgasm control over me. Domestic discipline was a little more difficult. Mrs. Lion has been spanking me almost from the very start of our relationship. It took her a very long time to hit me hard enough for me to really feel it. By the time we started male chastity, she was delivering spankings that could make me yelp. They weren’t hard enough to make me try to escape, but I could definitely feel them.

Is it bdsm or punishment?

We were both confused about how we would differentiate between a punishment and a play spanking. We tried lots of different things. All of our attempts are documented in earlier posts. I did research and passed on what I read to Mrs. Lion. She worked on her technique and finally developed an effective punishment style.

Now there is no mistaking a punishment spanking from one delivered as part of BDSM play. It’s not that one ends up more painful than the other. Though I have to say my punishment spankings end up hurting me a lot more nowadays. The difference is in how Mrs. Lion delivers it. She wants it to hurt right from the start. She swats as hard as she can while allowing me to avoid trying to escape. She intentionally aims for spots that I find most painful. If I was sexually aroused when assuming my spanking position, her first 10 swats dispel any arousal.

My skin frequently breaks during a spanking. I don’t understand exactly why. I have been routinely applying skin lotion to my rear end to keep the skin more flexible. I bleed less, but there is still some blood. I can’t feel it when I bleed. There is no visible wound after the spanking. It’s a little mysterious. Mrs. Lion has learned to disregard the bleeding. It doesn’t stop the punishment. I totally subscribe to this. Unlike a play spanking, nothing stops the punishment other than a safeword. I haven’t safeworded up until this point. My understanding is that if I do, the spanking will end then and there. However, the next day Mrs. Lion will repeat it until it reaches her conclusion.

I’m not a very satisfactory spanking target. I feel the pain every bit as much as anyone else. However, it’s very difficult to mark me. I don’t get as red as others do and it’s highly unusual to bruise me. It’s also very difficult to leave me with discomfort the next day. Part of this is probably technique. In the past, when I’ve received play spankings at various BDSM events, I have been left with “souvenir” bruises. I think Mrs. Lion and I may need to experiment so that she can reliably mark me and give me a reminder the next day.

Typical marks left after Mrs. Lion’s “experiment” spanking. I never get marks like this after punishment.

should we return to the “spanking experiment” style?

One of the precepts of the famous Disciplinary Wives Club was that a spanking would be extremely painful and would hurt for days afterward. I agree with this concept. I think that I’m being too much of a baby when I’m being spanked, and this is deterring my lioness. I’m not sure how to overcome it. My suggestion is that when I appear to be trying to roll away, that she introduce longer pauses between groups of swats. This was very effective when she was doing her “experiments”. Each experiment was at least 300 swats, in groups of 10 swats. She used different paddles and different levels of force. Almost every experiment ended with me being marked.

The marks almost always appeared on the sides of my cheeks. That may be a hint for her. That’s also where swats hurt the most. I managed to accept these stronger spankings because Mrs. Lion paused long enough between 10 swat volleys to let me compose myself. Over time as I learned to better accept the pain, the pauses grew shorter.

Since then, my disciplinary spankings have been considerably milder than her experiments. I’m not sure why but I think she might want to consider returning to the level of force she used then. There was no permanent damage and we both agreed I had been soundly spanked. In case you’re wondering, I consider it part of my role to help make her more effective as my disciplinary wife. I think that’s only fair. If she had grown up in a household where spanking was common and very painful, I’m sure she wouldn’t need my input. Neither of us grew up in that environment. We have to learn on our own.

I’m not suggesting that the punishment spankings I currently receive are too mild. They aren’t. They are quite effective. I think we both agree that more is better. Mrs. Lion is still finding her way. I suggest she think back to those experiments. When she finished those, she had a spanking style that truly struck fear into my heart.