By:
In: Male Chastity, Domestic discipline

I started the weekend working on our blog. If I didn’t fuck it up, you should be seeing pages serve up even faster than before. I’m shooting for under two seconds to see a page. I find myself driven deeper and deeper into weird web technology. I won’t bother you with the details. I’ll just say that there is a surprising amount of technology behind this blog. There isn’t too much in front of it.

Mrs. Lion and I tend to circle a subject for a long time before any changes happen. She has her way of processing prospective change. She said she would try to spank me if I interrupted her. She didn’t explicitly call out being a know-it-all or pissing her off in other ways. We’ll have to see.

Even though I write here about new ideas, that doesn’t mean I’m calling the disciplinary shots. I’m not. Mrs. Lion does what she wants. She will try things that I suggest, but that’s as far as my influence goes. The same is true of sex. For example, she agreed to try male chastity and kept me locked in a male chastity device. She started doing it because I asked. She continued because she felt it was working for us.

I don’t think she is very different from most other wives in that respect. They may be convinced to try something, but they won’t keep it up unless it works for them. Extra work is involved when it comes to male chastity or domestic discipline. It takes time to lock and unlock a chastity device. Even if the woman has her husband do it for her, the activity distracts from sexual activity. Spanking is hard work. It takes time and energy to do it.

While many guys roll their eyes at this because they believe male chastity and DD are beneficial to their wives, they are missing a critical point. A loving partnership doesn’t require spanking or orgasm control to work smoothly. Both are “extras” that the male partner requests. If a man has to be locked into a chastity device and driven mad with desire to get him to go down on his wife, guess what? She won’t want him to bother. There is nothing I need to be forced to do if Mrs. Lion wants it.

The same is true of domestic discipline. It’s true that I get punished when I miss a chore or (hopefully) if I annoy Mrs. Lion. That doesn’t mean I need punishment to do these things. It means that I can forget or behave thoughtlessly. If I do, I get spanked because I asked Mrs. Lion to do it. If she had to use her paddle to make me do the right thing, our marriage wouldn’t last. DD provides her a way to clear the slate when I screw up and remind me what  I need to do. It’s what I asked her to do, not what she imposed on me.

The best way to kill male chastity or domestic discipline is to make the practice unpleasant for your partner. Whining and endless references to what you want or expect. It’s no fun to either partner when this happens. It almost guarantees failure. We have a system. I bring up an idea and let Mrs. Lion know about it. If she agrees to try it, I let it go for a while. If I don’t see or feel anything after a few days, I remind her. She’ll tell me if that bothers her, and if it does, I stop. She is in control.

That doesn’t mean that I can never bring up the subject again. I can unless she tells me that she doesn’t want to do whatever I asked. If she follows through on our latest discussion (“Strike Three!“), I will get a strike if she feels pressured. The point is that we have a way to manage my anxiety and her sanity. It works for us.

By:
In: Punishment

This morning, I had a thought. I know. It has to happen sooner or later. What if I gave Lion demerits? I could tally them up and when he reached a certain number, he’d get his punishment. Maybe it would be better to use strikes. Three strikes and he’s out. I could tell him when he’s earned one and he could keep track. I don’t know. I was thinking that would be fairer than spanking him every time. After a while, maybe I’ll work my way up to punishing each time. We have to start somewhere. [Lion — I think we wrote about this concept a few years ago and decided it was too complicated. However, maybe this time it’s a good way to introduce spanking for annoying my lioness. I’ll keep track!]

I forgot to say that Lion had an orgasm Thursday night. He told me he was horny and I thought he should prove it. I tied his balls and set to work on him. It didn’t take long (still longer than I thought) before he was clenching his thighs. I don’t remember him doing that until recently. I know he’s said the muscles tighten, but he’s never started to bring his legs together. He doesn’t squish me, and it’s useful to know when he’s close. Maybe I can edge him more effectively.

After all my hard work, I didn’t get any cream filling. I teased him about it when I did his eye drops. On my way past, I poked my weenie and asked where my cream filling was. As much as I’d love some, I don’t think it’s under anyone’s control. Lion has been doing the Kegel electrode. As long as there isn’t a physical problem, I’m fine just lusting after cream filling. It’s more important to me that Lion enjoys his orgasms.

Last night we had barbecue for dinner. It’s a lot of food and we were stuffed. There was no play to be had. Just two roly-poly Lions watching TV. Tonight, I’ll offer some attention. We may only snuggle, but that’s never an “only”. We both love snuggling and being close. Cream filling be damned.

By:
In: Domestic discipline

Our hydroponic “farm” is doing very well. We’re both excited by the progress. We have two units. We got this first one three weeks ago and another earlier this week. The lettuce and tomato plants in the picture were planted in the first unit we got. It’s hard to believe that we have lettuce we can eat in such a short time. This is just a partial view. To the left of the image is another section filled with mature lettuce.

I’m amazed at how fast things grow hydroponically. We read that plants mature five times faster when grown in water. It’s true! Dealing with our farm takes very little time. We are enjoying the little effort it takes.

Mrs. Lion gave me an oral orgasm on Thursday night. I was ready for it. Based on all of her efforts, it seems that ten days was the right wait. I’m still not producing any semen. I told her that I’m a diet lion; no calories when I orgasm. I’ve been using my EMS machine almost every day. I’m getting results in terms of bladder control. I go all night without waking up to pee.

We discussed my post from yesterday, “Our Next Step In Domestic Discipline.” Mrs. Lion isn’t sure why she has such a hard time punishing me for annoying her. Dan wrote an interesting comment on our post.

“To me, it always seems like a spanking for making her mad should come easier to her than something like not doing a chore, yet it doesn’t. I’ve encouraged my wife to spank me when she feels anger or irritation because one of the main reasons for us doing DD is it equalizes the power dynamic between us and gives her an outlet for expressing frustration. Yet, she too seems to struggle with expressing her own personal feelings in that way, yet doesn’t struggle at all to address other things that don’t have nearly as much personal impact on her.”

This issue seems to be a common one among couples practicing domestic discipline. I think that our partners aren’t disciplining us because it is a way to equalize the power balance in our marriages. They are doing it because it is something we want. It’s no different from male chastity in the sense that it’s a practice that we want/need to satisfy something within us. Our partners don’t seem to internalize it as something they can use to make us hear them.

That doesn’t mean domestic discipline isn’t useful to our partners. Mrs. Lion would certainly be annoyed each time I forgot a chore. Spanking me helps her feel that she is being heard. Isn’t that the same thing that would happen if she spanked me for interrupting? Initially, I thought the difference was that chores are concrete, binary activities. I either do them, or I don’t. If I don’t, I get spanked. Right?

Isn’t interrupting the same? Well, no, it isn’t the same. If I fail to do a chore, the evidence of my crime is visible for all to see. If I interrupt, unless Mrs. Lion stops her train of thought to tell me what I just did, there is no evidence to show me later. I don’t think the problem is a lack of evidence, as it’s her interpretation of the event.

If she stops and says, “You just interrupted me,” we have an event that she can handle the same way she handles missing a chore. If she thinks about it later, she tends to rationalize my behavior and believes that maybe it wasn’t all my fault. She has a strong sense of fair play. Nothing is more destructive to a disciplinarian than that. To be fair, in the beginning, Mrs. Lion would tend to excuse me for missing chores. She would cut me slack for mitigating events, like going out or being busy with something else.

She stopped doing that some time ago. She will very rarely let me get away with missing a chore. That’s how I want it. When it comes to things like interrupting, I don’t want fairness. I want each event to be punished. It doesn’t matter if something else might have caused me to do it. Like chores, I either did it, or I didn’t. Binary. Simple.

I realize that there are emotional hurdles to overcome before Mrs. Lion can be comfortable spanking me for annoying her. I think that it is worth the effort for her to do it. It will help me feel better about how I deal with her. I’ve learned that being punished for failing to do something I should do is an effective way to help me improve. I want things to be more equal between us. I’m convinced that learning to spank me for interrupting would be a great step in the right direction.

By:
In: Domestic discipline, Punishment

Some years ago, a coworker was talking about her roommate wanting to use a shock collar on her (the coworker’s) dog. She was against it. She told him if he tried, she’d put the shock collar on his balls and see how he liked it. Everyone laughed. Obviously, she didn’t know I do that to Lion. I wasn’t volunteering that information. Women often talk about training their men to do housework or to bring them flowers or to do other tasks. You’d think that would make me the happiest woman on the planet. I have permission to train Lion and to shock his balls and to punish him for not doing what I think he should do. I bet some women would liken that to winning the lottery.

Why is it so difficult for me?

I think, if I was raised in a household where the father was the king or the mother was the queen, I might have an easier time. If my father called the shots and my mother was the stereotypical 50s mom who had dinner ready every night when my father walked through the door and my sister met him with his slippers and I met him with the newspaper, I’d either think that’s the way things were supposed to be or I’d think, “Hell, no.” The first example might have led me to wait hand and foot on my spouse. The second example might have led me to have my spouse wait on me hand and foot. The opposite might be true if my mother called the shots. My parents worked together. My father hung the laundry out when my mother was unable to. My mother would help my father disassemble the lawn mower on the kitchen table. Lion and I are like my parents in that respect.

It never occurred to me to tell Lion what to do. It never occurred to me to change him. I’m sure there are things he does that bug me and vice versa. He’s gotten me to eat somewhat better. I took him in his first camper. In retrospect, that was a terrible idea. We wouldn’t have the camper we have now if it weren’t for stepping into that camper at a fair. The point is, I was happy with the way things were before domestic discipline. That doesn’t mean I’m unhappy now. I just can’t figure out how to progress any further.

Lion’s idea is that I should punish him if he even thinks about looking at me sideways. His theory is that I can’t spank him too much. I don’t have a theory, but I’m willing to give his a try. I think. I mean, I say I will, but we know how that goes. If I was drooling at the thought of his breaking a rule so I could swat him, there wouldn’t be a problem. I could manufacture reasons. It would be so much easier if I were wired that way. For now, I’ll try to short-circuit my brain so I can punish him more.