Finding My Footing

Personally, I think it stands to reason that I’m off my game. Do I miss working? I guess I miss the structure and, yes, I miss some of the people. We tell each other stupid things we’ve done, like when I put dinner in the oven for a half-hour only to realize I never turned the oven on. I thought Lion enjoyed these silly stories or the outrageous thing someone did that management ignored. I think we all vent about the latter when we get home. Now I’m always home. There are no funny stories, except on Facebook.

Right now, every day feels like a weekend day. On weekends, we wake up a little later and lounge in bed a little longer. I’ll go write my post and Lion will go in his office. We usually make plans to go out and that trip can take up most of the day. Since I took a break from unpacking, I haven’t really gotten anything done. Today, I’ll head back into the realm of unpacking. Time to get my butt in gear.

Lion says he’s been initiating everything. Again, he’s working. He knows how long he needs to spend doing whatever projects he’s working on. He knows when his meetings are scheduled. A few times, when I’ve come home from work and tried to kiss him while he was working, he’s made me feel like I was interrupting so I try to keep that to a minimum. From now on, when I see him heading for the bedroom, I will follow him.

I maintain that we still talk to each other. We talk about the latest news from President Buffoon since that’s really the only news on anymore. How many cases of the virus there are and how many deaths and how stupid it is that there aren’t enough supplies for doctors and nurses to do their jobs. We watch reruns of comedies and laugh together. Our “platonic” snuggling last night actually started out like any other snuggling until Lion said he was tired. I figured that meant he didn’t want to play. He said I’ve never let that stop me before. (It has.) I didn’t know he was already hurt that we hadn’t done anything earlier in the day.

Things are a little strained right now. I generally give him a kiss after each eye drop but those kisses have felt more platonic since last night. When I was cleaning up from dinner, I noticed he hadn’t put the coffee pot together. Sometimes he remembers later. By this morning, he still hadn’t done it. No, it’s not a big deal for me to do it but it is a punishable offense. I wrestled with telling him he’d forgotten. He might have left it because he figured I’ve given up so why shouldn’t he. He might have told me he didn’t realize he’d forgotten but what difference does it make because he’s just work for me. Maybe he just truly forgot. He hadn’t gotten his mid-morning coffee, which is when he normally puts the coffee pot together. I decided I could handle whatever response he gave me and informed him that he was in trouble. He did really forget and he’ll get his swats right after lunch. Dessert swats, if you will.

I have no idea if he’ll be in the mood for punishment after lunch or not. It doesn’t really make a difference either way. I wasn’t really in the mood to be told I don’t like him anymore when I read his post. We’re both a little raw right now although I’m sure he’ll say he’s the injured party. I guess there’s no better way to wake 4.0 up than telling her she’s slacking. Now he’ll definitely be the injured party.

1 Comment

  1. “Now he’ll definitely be the injured party.”

    Man. That is cold.

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