It’s The Way We Live


When we started out with enforced male chastity over six years ago, we didn’t have any idea how life would change for us. Now that we are approaching our 4000th post, I guess I’ve grown more reflective. Change has a way of sneaking up on me. Something starts out as a sexy novelty, like male chastity. It feels weird and fun in a sexy way. Over time, the novelty wears off. By then, it’s become a habit. It’s just the way we are.

I’ve been required to be naked at home for so long I just don’t notice. I have learned to stand back when cooking to avoid hot fat hitting my protrucing penis.

This came home to me on Sunday morning. We were lying together in bed watching “In the Kitchen with David” on QVC. We like to see the new products and enjoy the silly demos. The show is a combination of, “I can’t believe anybody would want that!”, and “Let’s order that.” Yesterday we ended up with some delicious cinnamon bread and a couple of sliding stands for our coffee pots. By the way, I have decided to start adding information about exactly what we use to do things.

Apropos of nothing, Mrs. Lion turned to me and said,

“You forgot something, didn’t you?”

I thought for a second and nothing came to mind. I gave Mrs. Lion a blank look. She reminded me that I didn’t set up the coffeepot. One of my daily chores is to add water to the coffeepot put a new filter in and put the washed coffeepot into the coffee maker. I replied,

“I’m in trouble, aren’t I?”

In a very matter-of-fact voice, Mrs. Lion said,

“Yes you are. You also forgot something else. Yesterday was punishment day.”

“Oh shit.”

I asked her what was going to happen. In that same matter-of-fact tone she said you are going to be spanked. I made a vague reference to the fact that these were minor offenses. She simply said,

“You forgot punishment day.”

I didn’t say anything else. Clearly, forgetting to set up the coffee maker is a misdemeanor, but to Mrs. Lion continuing to forget punishment day on Saturday has become a more serious offense.

Cuisinart coffeemaker that grinds beans and brews coffee automatically. We use Peter’s Blend from Porto Rico Coffee in New York. They ship.

That’s what got me reflecting. It wasn’t that I’ve earned a spanking. It was that this entire process has become a routine event. There is nothing notable about earning and delivering punishments. They are simply part of our lives. I did ask when I was going to be spanked. Mrs. Lion told me it would be today (on Sunday). That’s it. I will also get a punishment for forgetting the coffee maker. I suppose I’ll find out what that is when she decides to administer it.

In most other people’s homes, this would be a fairly notable event. How many husbands and wives routinely receive and administer punishments? No discussion is required or expected. At the proper time Mrs. Lion will tell me to get into the bedroom. I will assume the position and she will punish me. Routine. No different than making the bed or letting the dog out.

Since we have been together, I have had a rule that I’m not allowed to wear clothes while home. There are exceptions: I can wear a T-shirt if I’m cold, and if we have company, I can be dressed. This is so ingrained that it’s not even noted anymore. Only at times like yesterday morning, when I’m thinking about how things were a decade earlier, I realize that things other people might consider incredibly odd are routine parts of our lives.

We aren’t the only people doing things like this. In a recent post on another blog, the blogger noted that her husband isn’t allowed to wear clothes at home either. That blog’s been around about as long as ours.

Over the years, we’ve evolved these practices to work for us. It’s true, while being spanked maybe routine, I still think about it and I am not pleased that sitting down tomorrow will be uncomfortable. I also feel angry that I forgot such an obvious pair of chores. I’m going to work much harder to avoid making those mistakes again.

the hanson ferule paddle in bloodwood. ouch!
The Hanson ferule paddle. This bloodwood model is the most effective spanker she owns. If Bloodwood isn’t available, they usually have a 1/2″ Maple. Select the thickest, hardest wood for best results. They have a model with holes. Totally unnecessary. Ouch!

That last paragraph is a very good example of how something is working for us. A year ago, I would’ve been focusing on how hot it was to be spanked on my bare bottom. I might even get a little aroused thinking about it. Now, I think about how simple it would’ve been to just prepare the coffeepot and remind Mrs. Lion of punishment day. Stupid lion!

That’s not to say I’m not going to forget again. But I felt a really strong incentive to be have a better memory. I know that a spanking of Mrs. Lion’s new variety is really horrible. It’s serious enough to incentivize me to be a lot more careful about what I do. As I reflect, I realize that this is exactly the reason she does it. Domestic discipline (FLRD) is fully integrated into our marriage. It’s no joke.

I’ve learned that it takes a while to transition from novelty to an integral part of our relationship. If something we do has potential to improve our lives, we have learned to pursue it even though in the beginning it’s difficult. The best example of this is Mrs. Lion and spanking. She’s evolved from a timid, gentle spanker, to a full-fledged disciplinarian. She has told me that her focus is to effectively send her message. She’s doing a good job. She’s tried a lot of different paddles. I think she settled on one that is absolutely the most painful. She’s not worried about me having a good time anymore. She’s interested in helping me learn to do what I’m supposed to.

We are still in the very early stages of Mrs. Lion punishing me for doing things that annoy her. I can think of several times that I cut her off or changed the subject before she could finish her thought. She didn’t do more than growl a little when I did. I’m not sure why she didn’t punish me. She said she would even for the slightest thing. I guess more work is needed there.

Anyway, my Sunday reflections feel good. We’ve changed a lot over the last six years. We’ve made lifestyle changes that neither of us considered in the past. They’ve successfully helped me to change, helped Mrs. Lion express her feelings, and helped us keep the romantic fires burning. I guess in our house we use a paddle to light the Yule Log.