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In: Pain, Lion's Journal

There are many kinds of pain. There’s the welcome kind that comes with BDSM play. When skillfully administered, this pain will eventually produce an endorphin high. This state is frequently referred to as “Sub Space”. Recreational torture isn’t the only way to attain this endocrine high. Runners get it after a long, exhausting jog. Hard physical labor can also produce it. Initially, when the pain starts it may not be fun, but as the brain chemicals catch up the sensations actually start to feel pleasant.

Then, there’s chronic pain. Many of us suffer some of this. It’s that unrelenting ache that just won’t stop. Intensity can range from annoying to debilitating. A great deal of opioid dependency arises from trying to manage chronic pain. Mrs. Lion suffers from some aches in her joints and frequent headaches. She muscles through them, rarely using medication. She has some and will, on occasion use it to help her cope. I’m fortunate I don’t suffer from chronic pain. By rights, my neck should hurt. In fact, the usual reason people go to the doctor and end up getting a kind of surgery I’ll be getting, is that they have chronic neck pain.

In fact when I went for my meeting with the neurosurgeon, I was asked to fill out a form. I can only answer one or two questions. There were 10 or 12 that cover a history of physical therapy and drugs used to manage the chronic pain that supposedly brought the patient to the surgeon.

There’s more exotic kinds of pain. One most of us have experienced is the pain of injury. My most vivid memory of this is how badly I hurt after I fell and tore my rotator cuff. The pain was unrelenting and so severe I couldn’t sleep. I endured it with gaps created by drugs and cortisone shots for six months. Then I got the surgery to correct it.

That brings me to more exotic examples. Surgical pain  is the result of having a procedure done that cuts into the body. There are actually two kinds as far as I can tell. The first is the pain of the actual wound created by the surgeon scalpel. In my experience, this is fairly short-lived. After the rotator cuff surgery, the surgical wound pain was gone after about a week. I’m told that the wound pain from my spinal surgery will be largely gone in 2 to 3 days.

The second kind of surgical pain lasts much longer. This is caused by the insults to the body inflicted by the surgery. It’s hard to generalize what causes this pain. In the case of my rotator cuff surgery, it was related to the stretching and reattaching of my tendon. This pain lasted over a year. Of course, there was much worse for the first four or five months. In my case, I was given opioids to deal with the pain. After only a few weeks, the opioids stopped working. I had a hard time finding anything that could alleviate this pain after that.

I’m told to expect at least two months of neck pain after the spinal operation. Apparently, according to the surgeon, it’s worse for the first few weeks. Then, it supposedly controllable with over-the-counter pain medication. I don’t get any comfort from this. Because I am taking a blood thinner, I can’t use aspirin, ibuprofen, or other similar drugs. They can cause bleeding in the stomach which would be fatal when blood thinners are being taken. I decided to be aggressive about managing this. I’m getting an appointment with the pain management team at the hospital to work out a strategy to support me after my surgery.

In the worst case I’ll stop taking the blood thinners so that I can use anti-inflammatory medication. My cardiologist absolutely opposes this. I am at risk for a stroke if not taking that medicine. This is one of those situations where calculated risk is needed. I’ve never had any stomach problems taking anti-inflammatory drugs, so my risk may not be as high as it would be for others.

There are other kinds of pain such as unwelcome trauma. But I don’t think they manifest differently than the ones I’ve already talked about. I’ve known a couple of people who suffered from horrible, painful, eventually-fatal diseases. They used BDSM pain as a distraction from the much more serious pain of their diseases. Since after my surgery there isn’t any restriction on my motion, maybe we can experiment with the kind of distraction I would get from Mrs. Lion’s skillful spankings. Will I forget about my neck when my butt is burning? I see another experiment coming.

By:
In: Spanking games, Lion's Journal
tenderizer paddle on lion's butt
This is the heavy chechen “tenderizer”. It’s my official “scorekeeper”.
(Click image to view larger)

Today is Super Bowl Sunday. As long as we’ve been together, Mrs. Lion and I enjoy our Super Bowl rituals. I make a big plate of nachos. We have two kinds of salsa, and of course, our favorite beverages. We sit on the bed, munch, and cheer for our favorite team. This year, as in any year they play, it’s the team playing against the Patriots.

Mrs. Lion announced the rules to our special Super Bowl spanking game:

  • I get 4 hard swats for each point the Patriots score.
  • I get 2 more gentle swats for each Ram point.
  • As usual, each penalty gets me a zap with the shock collar.
  • If the Patriots sack the Rams quarterback, I get 2 swats with the pointy side of the paddle.
  • If the Patriots intercept the ball, I get 2 swats with the pointy side of the paddle.

It’s easy for me to end up with lots of marks by the end of the game. There’s something exciting about being vulnerable to this sort of abuse. In past games, by the end of the third quarter, my butt is burning and I am actively hoping no one scores.

Nevertheless, it is fun in an odd, perverse way. I think Mrs. Lion likes it too. She never talks about how this makes her feel. Since football move so slowly, administering the spanking doesn’t cause us to miss any of the game. Ironically, the most damage done to my rear has been the result of our football game. Today’s game carries considerable risk for much more punishment. Each Patriot touchdown brings me 28 hard swats with a very heavy, punishing paddle. Even a field goal earns me a dozen. Ironically, the turnover and sacking swats with the pointy and of the paddle don’t hurt much at all. In fact, right from the start I barely feel them.

I don’t understand that. When Mrs. Lion brings those little points down hard on my tender skin, she has drawn a little blood. Or, made little round bruises where each point made contact. I believe that later those injuries leave me painful mementos. The swats with the flat side hurt like hell while I get them and for an hour or so after.

Of course, when the total gets up to 100 or more, there can be a much longer-lasting effect. I’ve had sore spots when I sit for three or four days as a result of Mrs. Lion’s “experiment”. Of course, our experiment sessions involve 300 painful swats. If the Super Bowl ends up with lots of touchdowns, I figure the effect on me will be similar.

All I can say is that I hope the Rams win 3 nothing.

By:
In: Mrs Lion Comments

If you’re unfamiliar with one of our more ridiculous traditions, allow me to fill you in. Some poor groundhog in Pennsylvania is yanked out of his slumber to predict when spring will come. If the groundhog sees his shadow, we’re in for six more weeks of winter. If he doesn’t see his shadow, then spring will arrive early. For people who can count, it’s always six weeks until spring officially arrives anyway, but I understand the appeal of hoping for an early unofficial start to spring.

In another context, there’s a Bill Murray movie in which every day is a repeat of groundhog day. This is the connotation I’d like to address. On Facebook, there have been a lot of posts saying that January was quite a year. Yes. Yes, it was. Between going to the doctor, falling several times, getting a a scary diagnosis and scheduling surgery, January was a difficult year for Lion. I’m looking forward to February being a lot calmer. As a matter of fact, if we have to continue today for a few weeks, I’m game.

The dog woke us up around eight this morning. I was in the middle of a dream so I was groggy. It was quite an effort to get out of bed to make breakfast. I don’t feel great but I don’t feel horrible. Lion has been seeing a little better lately. His ankle is still sore but a lot better than it has fe;t for a few days. Best of all, it’s Saturday. If we want to waste our day in bed watching TV, we can. I don’t want to tempt fate but so far so good.

Lion announced he was horny yesterday. He hadn’t slept much the night before and I was very tired too, so I didn’t think there was much chance of anything happening but we did snuggle a bit. He’s been studying his MRI and researching his condition and the surgery. Now we wait. In the meantime, we can play our Super Bowl game tomorrow and play in general until the surgery in about six weeks. I suspect Lion will want to be waxed prior to then since there won’t be any waxing going on while he recovers. We’ll prepare the house and Lion, and life will go on.

In some ways, it’s a relief to have a plan. In others, well, we wish it wasn’t this plan. But here’s to Groundhog Day. May it be as uneventful as it’s started out.

[Lion — I’ve been thinking about my lack of body hair. Part of my surgery involves needles being placed into pretty much every muscle group on my body. Happily, this is done after I’m unconscious. The point is to monitor my spinal cord performance. This means that the surgical team will be closely involved with every inch of me. I’ve been wondering if it wouldn’t be better to let my peach fuzz grow out. On the other hand, if I’m not waxed it’s still going to be obvious that I remove body hair. I’m trying to decide if I give a damn about it. The more I think about it, the less I care. Wax away, Mrs. Lion!]

By:
In: Games, Lion's Journal

Tomorrow is Super Bowl Sunday. Mrs. Lion wants to modify our NFL spanking game rules for the big game. In my world, “modify” invariably means more painful. I suggested she double the number of swats per point when the Patriots score. That means, I get two swats when the Rams score for each point and four swats per point when the Patriots score.

According to the TV news this morning, the patriots are predicted to win by four points. So the Lion point spread is 16 swats. Of course, this is just my proposal. Mrs. lion may have something completely different in mind. I imagine I’ll still get a zap from the shock collar for each foul. The NFL game really keeps me jumping.

We are going about things normally again. I know that the upcoming surgery is just below the surface in both of our minds, but there’s absolutely no point dwelling on it. I spent some time yesterday studying the MRI results. The radiology department was kind enough to mark the spot that poses the biggest problem. I’m both amazed and a little depressed when I look at those images. I’m amazed that I can look inside my body and see my spinal column and spinal cord. Unlike an x-ray, which doesn’t really show soft tissue, this high resolution MRI provides a very detailed view of my insides.

Of course, I understand what I’m looking at and it doesn’t make me happy to see the damage in my neck. It’s my nature to dig into things until I get enough information to be satisfied. I’ve done that about my problem and I understand that repair is a fairly safe procedure. Yes, there are risks. Most are very unlikely to occur. One risk is partial paralysis of an arm that lasts several months. This happens in about one third of the surgeries. Just something else to worry about.

Meanwhile, back to things we can control, I’m excited about our Super Bowl play. It should be big fun. Assuming I don’t get to ejaculate sooner, Sunday will be my fifth day. I know, that’s not very long and I’m not claiming that Mrs. Lion has indicated an orgasm is scheduled for Super Bowl Sunday.

As you may have guessed, my sex drive is coming back. It was hiding because I was genuinely afraid I would have to spend time in an immobilizing neck brace. According to the surgeon, there is no scenario where I will need to wear a brace. That takes an enormous load off my mind and allows my thoughts to drift south to Mrs. Lion’s weenie. She hasn’t locked me up since the MRI. Of course, I’m writing this on Friday afternoon and later tonight, I may find myself locked in one of the devices.

It’s entirely too easy to dwell on my upcoming surgery. I can’t claim that I’ve been very good about putting it out of my mind. I got very little sleep Thursday night and ended up watching TV until after 3 AM. I hope that it will be different going forward.

I’d like to thank our friends for the kind comments sent my way. They mean a lot to me.