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In: Mrs Lion Comments, Rewards

Lion has decided that coupons are his friends. Last night he cashed in his most recent Good Lion coupon for an extra play session of his choice. He’s been watching that spanking video he found online so his choice was spanking and teasing.

A few nights ago I spanked him and he said I could have continued on if I wanted to. Well, the problem was not that I thought he couldn’t handle any more. The problem was that my back was hurting. I was in a bad position while I whacked him. Last night I brought out more implements and also sat next to him a lot of the time rather than kneeling next to him. And I sort of leaned on his back which he probably assumed was to hold him down, but was actually to get a better angle to spank from. At any rate, I got his sexy buns very red and he got his coupon’s worth.

When I was done with his backside, I told him to turn over so I could torture the front side. He had been very horny all day. I know this because he kept telling me. Sort of like a weather report but instead of saying the sun is out now and then there are some clouds, his forecast was the same:

“I’m horny. Did I mention I’m horny? I think I forgot to tell you I’m horny.”

But I have to say, when I was sucking him he didn’t seem all that horny. Eventually I moved beside him and worked on him with my hand. He was very receptive to that.

I was thinking of giving him a ruined orgasm. Each time I edged him I tried to go a little further, but I was afraid of going too far. I edged him five times with no ruined orgasm. Oh well. Something to strive for tonight during his regularly scheduled play night.

By:
In: Lion's Journal

Yesterday, my post was about our journey through enforced male chastity and beyond. This is part two: control. As Mrs. Lion has said, a good deal of what I wish for in terms of discipline would turn out to be horrible if she actually listened to my requests. Specifically, she is referring to my request for severe spanking if I do something wrong. I’ve told her about a video I recently saw where a man was spanked hard and fast with a hairbrush. You could see his butt change color with each swat.

She’s right. I would hate that. But, on some level do I need it? I have no idea. It is a fantasy, but certainly not a strong request. It is clear to me that I want to feel Mrs. Lion’s authority. Last week I got a bit of it. I was miserably horny I really wanted an orgasm. At one point she offered me a trade I didn’t accept. A day later I asked if I could come. Her answer:

“No, you have to wait.”

I didn’t like hearing that. The brat in me wanted it NOW. But I also liked it. I liked that Mrs. Lion put her paw down and that was that. She has a very sweet way of putting her paw down. Now, if I argue, I suggest that is a very good reason to spank me. I have said that I want her in charge. Resistance of any kind needs to be nipped in the bud. At least that is what I think. The main reason I don’t use my coupons is that they prevent me from a chance for a “Because I told you.” Once I get more of those, I will probably be very happy to cash them in.

I’ve wondered what all this is about. I love my independence. I am strong willed and can be stubborn. With all that, Mrs. Lion and I rarely butt heads. This is partly because she is so sweet and partly because we both truly want to make each other happy.

Here’s the hard part: Let’s say we both agree that what I really want is to feel her authority and that those nasty spankings are reserved for stubbornness and disobedience. We haven’t come up with many opportunities for me to obey or to be stubborn. So far, only my waits represent clear expressions of her authority. I can’t think of anything else where Mrs. Lion has the opportunity to say, “Because I said so.”

That’s good news really. We aren’t correcting problems, other than when I interrupt and Mrs. Lion rarely corrects me for that. Up until very recently, Mrs. Lion has been great about bonus orgasms. I love those, but each time I get one, it takes away a chance to say, “Too bad, Lion. You have to wait.” I am conflicted about losing those nice interludes.

Another possible area is making me do those things she knows I really dislike. They range from wearing a dry or worse, a wet diaper to painting my toenails or making me wear panties. Some guys really want those things. I absolutely don’t. I am not mentioning them here as a hint to get these things to happen. I am only saying that I would never volunteer for any of them.

Mrs. Lion was certainly right when she said I really regret things I say I want. I suggested the diaper and panties. I hate them. I am not turned on at all by wearing them. The nail polish was her idea and I hated it from the start. I don’t love to hate these things. I just flat out hate them.

Another interesting (to me at least) area is conditioning. This could turn out to be another item on my “I wish I kept my mouth shut” list. But I think it could be interesting. It does require extreme consistency on Mrs. Lion’s part, so it should be very limited at first. Maybe just associating something with being made hard or with coming?

We also have the shock collar. That’s something, when she uses it, that always makes Mrs. Lion laugh. Perhaps we should bring that back and actually use it more often. What do you think, Mrs. Lion?

When I let my mind wander into fantasy land, I tend to imagine the more extreme scenarios. the hornier I get, the more extreme the fantasy. The fact is, I think, that I am not asking for those brutal over-the-knee spankings, but for some loving authority.

I think we need to talk about this more.

By:
In: Chastity games, Femdom, Mrs Lion Comments, Sex

Lion wants to feel my control. I may have come up with one way to do just that. I haven’t ironed out all the details yet, but the concept is that on a certain day he will have to have two orgasms (he suggested more than two because he thinks two is a breeze – we’ll see) or his next scheduled date will be extended. The two biggest questions that need answering are when and how long.

When do I offer Lion this option? It could be on a scheduled date and if he doesn’t perform then the next scheduled date will be lengthened. Or it could be in the middle of his wait, in which case his current wait would be pushed out. If it’s in the middle of a wait and he does perform then he could quite possibly have another orgasm right around the corner. Lucky boy.

How long will the extension be? Does he need to know ahead of time to make the decision? How long does he have to meet the required number of orgasms? An hour? An afternoon? A full day?

And I’ve discovered another question: should it even be an option for him? Or should I just tell him that’s the activity for the day?

Lots of questions. Lots of thinking for Mrs. Lion. Lots of orgasms for a lion.

Even trying and failing would be fun for him. If this was a coupon he’d have no trouble at all using it. I know he can come twice in one day. We’ve done that before. We’ve never tried more than that. Maybe we need to have an inaugural orgasm-fest to see how many he can have in one day before I set a number. I’m just afraid too many orgasms would kill him. But at least he’d die with a smile on his face.

By:
In: Femdom, Lion's Journal, Punishment, Sex

Over time any blog becomes more and more about the people writing than the topic it is supposed to address. Based on the mail we get, this is a good thing. After all, once you get your enforced chastity questions answered, there would be little reason to continue reading a chastity how-to blog. Since I want to also serve those who want to get started and need the basics, we have fixed pages (see the menu across the top of the page) that address the issues most people want to understand.

What we have evolved into is Mrs. Lion and my journals. We are recording our actions, feelings, and wishes around my enforced chastity. Aside from sharing with you, we are frequently learning new things from each other. There’s something about the written word that provides more concrete communication. It’s one thing to forget what Mrs. Lion said. It’s another to say, “You didn’t write that.” It’s way too easy to go back to the blog and find out exactly what was said.

One of our biggest disconnects has nothing at all to do with enforced chastity. It’s around the basic power exchange itself. This isn’t anyone’s fault. I am not submissive by nature, nor even a little bit passive. Yet, I want to feel control and discipline. If Mrs. Lion took over our relationship and turned it into a domestic discipline, wife-led marriage, I would be miserable. But yet, I want to feel her control.

This has to be confusing for her. She has a very accepting nature. She doesn’t look for opportunities to lead. I think she likes that I manage most of the stuff around our marriage. She isn’t assertive about things she wants.

On one hand we have me, a basically assertive lion who is bull headed and always ready to go in his own direction, yet he craves sexual control and discipline. On the other hand we have an accepting, sweet lioness who is usually happy to go along with whatever her lion wants. In terms of the basic relationship this is as good as it gets. We compliment each other very well. We are opposite in many ways, but like a cup and saucer we fit together.

Then I get disruptive and want something that contradicts the very fabric of our power balance. Granted, we were both feeling physical distance from one another. Sexually, before starting enforced chastity, we were almost completely inactive. This caused each of us some stress, but our relationship and our love continued to get stronger. That made it easier to overlook the sexual elephant in the room.

We each compensated in our own ways. Mrs. Lion switched off sexually. I masturbated when the mood struck. I won’t go into how we came to try enforced chastity. Suffice it to say that I had a long interest in it but had never really tried it out. When I proposed being locked up, Mrs. Lion agreed. I told you that she is very agreeable and sweet.

This disruption is far deeper than we originally imagined. Aside from the obvious physical changes for me, the obvious effect of being locked forced us both to rethink everything about our sex life. Power issues aside, I am completely dependent on Mrs. Lion for any sexual release. Obvious, right? Well not so much.

With the ability to absolutely control my ability to come, came the responsibility of deciding when and how often that should be. Mrs. Lion is not used to making unilateral decisions that affect me so strongly. Moreover, since her sex drive has been in the dumper, these decisions have to be made without reference to any particular need of hers. It has been all about me.

We both have known for a long time that I like to bottom. I enjoy being spanked. At least I enjoy the idea of it. When I am in the process of receiving a punishment spanking I am not having fun. But yet I really want them.  I started thinking about it again when I saw a really strong over-the-knee spanking video. How do you punish someone who is usually in control? That’s Mrs. Lion’s dilemma.

Over the last year we have made some progress. Mrs. Lion has let me give her orgasms every so often even if she wasn’t in the “mood” at the time. She has learned to schedule my releases and sometimes resists giving me “bonus” orgasms before my scheduled wait is over. She gives me some fun spankings. I love those. And, on occasion a few punishment swats with a paddle.

Our basic power dynamic hasn’t changed. I don’t think it should. I keep hoping that Mrs. Lion will be more assertive about what she wants. I love granting her wishes. To her great credit, she has been making more domestic decisions. She has also been recognizing some of the things I do around the house. I even got a “Good Lion” coupon last week for an extra non-orgasmic play session. Things are moving in the right direction. Most importantly, our love continues to grow despite my chastity disruption.

I can’t understand why, for want of a better expression, domestic discipline is such a turn on to me. It’s stressful for both of us. Maybe once I get a taste of it, I will realize that it is one of those things that plays way better as a fantasy. Maybe I should just keep it a fantasy now. It isn’t an easy thing for Mrs. Lion to do emotionally or physically. I will have to be restrained. I know I will try to escape when it gets tough. I have no training or experience in receiving serious spankings. I also know I will absolutely hate it.

As you can see, I’m very conflicted about this. Is there a benefit for us if we go through with this much more drastic activity? Will I be happier? Are there behavioral things that need strong correction? If not, should we just try this as another form of play? Is it even possible for Mrs. Lion to comfortably try this? Do I really want this to happen?

I think my side of this falls into the “you don’t have a choice” category. I’m good with that sort of stuff. In fact, without any domestic discipline, I think I could satisfy a lot of my need for control with a larger dose of that sort of action on Mrs. Lion’s part. I really love/hate it when she says that to me.

As I reflect on the things I say I want, I realize that maybe I am visualizing consequences instead of the underlying need those consequences may be only one way of satisfying. Punishment is only one way to demonstrate control. Since I am locked up, Mrs. Lion has other ways to demonstrate her control. They range from ruined orgasms to extending my wait as a consequence of something I have done or failed to do. Skipping play sessions is another, milder consequence.

I know this begs the main question: What actions should have consequences? I’ll give you my thoughts tomorrow.