By:
In: Male Chastity
invisible leash remote
Mrs. Lion takes me shopping. Her invisible leash is always right at hand.

(Sunday, May 11 2014) To me one of the best signs of a healthy forced male chastity relationship is seamless integration into day-to-day living. Here is a picture (top) of Mrs. Lion with our shopping cart as we do our weekly trip to the warehouse store. The remote for my shock collar hangs loosely from her wrist. The business end – the receiver/shocker – is buried safely under my balls (bottom photo). You can see that it makes very good contact against that most sensitive spot.

So far, she hasn’t used it much. Once today, as we were walking down an isle I got a sharp zap. I looked at her, puzzled. “You interrupted me. You’re not supposed to do that.”

I had. The reminder did its job and I went silent. This device is proving very effective as a way to both “page” me when wanted and to correct me when I fail to obey either a rule or command. As of today, I only have two rules that my lioness enforces: don’t spill food or drink, and don’t interrupt. I usually get some bare bottom spanking for spilling at home, and when we are out I get zapped.

Spanking is a very effective punishment. It demonstrates my keyholder’s power and it has an after effect that can last for days. Zapping, however is very different. It’s applied while I am naughty. It’s a strong sensation and when it stops there is no after effect at all. The simple remote control allows my keyholder to vary the intensity from something I can barely feel, to one that will make me jump. She can hold the button for only a second or for 10.

The ability to vary intensity and time is a very useful training aid. If trying to correct a behavior like touching his genitals, the first reminder can be a rather mild zap. Repeated mistakes can get stronger and longer messages. The caged male determines how intense is correction will be. If he is a good boy it won’t be much at all. Repeating the offense will result in more discomfort.

shock trainer under balls
The business end of the trainer is strapped under the balls, behind the cage’s cock and ball ring. Note how the electrodes are in tight contact with my skin.

When we first considered using a training collar for male training, my concern was that the sensation would be far too mean, like a cattle prod, to be used under my tender balls. I was wrong. When we test the device, Mrs. Lion has to dial up considerably before I feel a tiny tingle. I always ask her to go up one more notch for signalling. The next notch feel a little stronger and unmistakable. If I wander off, a couple of zaps will bring me back. If I don’t move fast enough, I can expect stronger, repeated zaps until I am where I am told to be.

The hardest part of this more Mrs. Lion is the authority I want her to have. I know she doesn’t want to take charge of her lion in sexual (or any) matters. She is starting to see that it can be useful. She hates when I interrupt her. Now she has a simple, effective way to stop me from doing that anymore. She doesn’t mind if my hand wanders between my legs, so there is no correction there.

I know I should have lots of great ideas on what behaviors she may want to correct. I am embarrassed to say that I don’t. Is it that I just don’t have any bad habits? That can’t be. How many lions do you know who don’t need training?

You can help us. What requires discipline in your relationship? What male activities need the sort of conditioning and supervision this great toy provides? If you had a remote control for your male, how would you use it?

Please use the comments section, or if you want to communicate privately use Contact Us to send us a private message. Thanks! Caged Lion

By:
In: Femdom, Keyholder, Mrs Lion Comments

Well, I did. Sort of. I am notorious for thinking I want something and then either not having any clue how to get it, or deciding once I have it that it wasn’t really what I wanted at all. So I wind up with exercise equipment that just sits there and collects dust, and then I’m pining over that next piece of exercise equipment that I’m sure I want but I really know it will take its place gathering dust with the others. (Don’t panic, Lion. I’m not talking about you or the cage.)

I thought I was brilliant when I gave Lion the task of making breakfast on the weekends. I’ve been doing breakfast every morning for the better part of a decade. It’s his turn now. I did not think this through. I should have kept the weekends and given him the weekdays.

Lion loves blueberry pancakes with walnuts. He won’t make them for himself and he never asks me to make them because I don’t like pancakes. Every so often I make him his pancakes and I either eat them too or make myself eggs. But this generally happens on the weekends. And guess whose job it is to make breakfast on the weekends. Not mine. Rats.

This may not seem like a major problem and in the overall scheme of things it isn’t. But it all goes back to my inconsistencies. If I tell him I want to make breakfast on a weekend, then haven’t I just undermined my own rule? When he was uncaged recently he wanted to be recaged as soon as possible and part of the reason was that he didn’t want me to slip into my old habit again. If I make breakfast one weekend day once in a while, is it a slippery slope that soon goes to both days every weekend? And then what about the other rules? I admit I haven’t made many, but I don’t want to lose whatever progress I made. On the other hand, I make the rules so I should be able to amend them on a moment’s notice.

When I spoke to Lion about this he said he’d thought of the pancake problem too. I don’t know if he had any fixes in mind, but I do. Obviously, I could just take that one day back every few weeks and make him his pancakes. Or we could swap a day. I make pancakes on Sunday and he makes breakfast Monday. Or, and this is my favorite but certainly won’t be his, he can do weekdays while I do weekends.

The important part is to keep the communication flowing. If we can’t solve the pancake problem, how can we solve the bigger problems that are sure to arise along the way?

By:
In: Lion's Journal

Things have been quiet here. I’ve been sick with an infection in my leg. Between the antibiotics and other drugs, most of my time has been spent in bed. Yesterday’s post was written over several 15 minute sessions between rest periods. I had three trips to the doctor in three days. Things are starting to get better now. I’m completely tired of being sick. While I was sleeping some things changed here.

As you may have noticed, Southwood Princess is no longer on this site. Some readers expressed disappointment that we no longer have two couples here. Perhaps in the future another couple will join us here.

One of the biggest challenges to people trying to learn about forced male chastity is finding reliable information. It’s particularly hard for new keyholder to find information that is based on more than some male’s fantasy. I started this site to offer useful information from real couples who are embracing male chastity. Even though I have been writing about and teaching workshops on this subject for over 15 years, I never seriously considered being caged. The idea has always turned me on, but I never took the plunge. In January I asked Mrs. Lion if she would lock me up. She agreed. If you go back to our earliest posts you can see our evolution. Because of the doctor visits, I was uncaged for two full days and nights. This is the longest since I was locked up in January. Contrary to what others have written, I didn’t get homesick for my cage. But I did feel that my chastity device is a key part of all of the changes we have made. I asked lioness to cage me after my Friday doctor visit.

Lioness expressed some surprise that I wanted the cage back while I was still sick. I wanted to make sure that we continue making progress in this new approach to our sexuality. I didn’t want to take a chance that with the cage off, there would be a loss of momentum. It would be way too easy to just “forget” about forced chastity and the improved communication we now share. When I mentioned that to Mrs. Lion, she thought I was being silly. So I asked point-blank, “Do you still want me locked up? Really?” She immediately said that she does.

With us, chastity started as something I wanted and Mrs. Lion agreed to because it was important to me. I am grateful that she was willing to do that for me. Now, however, I think that she is finding benefits too. How about that? Some big things happened while I was sleeping.

By:
In: Male Chastity
no choice
One of the favorite chastity fantasies is that the caged male has no choice.

One of the paradoxes of forced male chastity is that while the keyholder has the power, the caged male frequently directs the action. Caged males always ask their keyholders to be “in charge” yet invariably talk about things they want to try. If you’re a keyholder you may wonder if you are doing your job if your caged male tells you about things he wants you to try and then you actually try them. So, who’s in charge?

This question has been debated endlessly. This debate is triggered when the people in the relationship forget that the language describing forced male chastity is not the same as the relationship itself. What I mean is that the male chastity relationship seems to imply that the male is controlled by his keyholder. Most people make the mistake of believing that the male has no input. As you have seen here before, any power exchange requires negotiation. Some people take that to absurd limits and have a massive written contract that tries to cover every conceivable possibility. Others, assume that the male should have no input whatsoever.

I like the “irrevocable” wish concept. It’s very simple. The male suggests something he would like his top to do, or a rule he thinks he should follow. The top, his keyholder, decides if she wants to grant this “wish”. If she does, he is then asked, “Are you sure? Once you agree you can’t back out.” If he agrees, then case closed, he’s got to live with it. That’s where “You have no choice” comes in. So, when I decided the shock collar would be a great addition to our chastity activities, and Mrs. Lion agreed, my ability to change that ended. I may live to regret that she can send a shock to my balls anytime she wants, but under this concept, I can’t prevent it.

What happens if I really hate something that either I or lioness proposed? It’s bound to happen eventually. The answer is absolutely simple: I ask her if we can suspend or eliminate that activity. A case in point is weekend diapers. I disliked them from the start, but felt it was a reasonable exercise of her power. I discovered that my sleep was badly disturbed by the diaper. Its extra insulation made me uncomfortably hot. Wearing it out in public wasn’t too bad, but it was hot then too. Mrs. Lion knows how little I like this. When we got the shock collar she had to choose between the diaper and the collar. I can’t wear both. If I pee with the collar on, it will get gross very quickly and could malfunction. So far my lioness prefers the collar. I can see her using the diapers for punishment (I hope she won’t!). She hasn’t agreed to eliminate them.

The point is that there is no such thing as absolute control in any modern chastity situation. The best way for control to be surrendered is through one-way consent. The caged male or his keyholder proposes a new rule or activity. The caged male gets to agree or disagree. Once there is agreement, then the caged male no longer gets a choice. It’s that simple.