Lion’s Birthday
On this day in 19-mumble-mumble, my best friend was born. Of course, I didn’t know it at the time. I wasn’t born yet. And it took a pretty long time before we found each other. And then some time before we realized we were best friends, soulmates, and whatever other terms you want to use for people who were clearly meant to be together.
I would do anything for Lion. And that, ironically, is causing him some concern. He feels selfish. I’ve told him to knock it off but he says he can’t help it. He’s at the point that he wants to stop male chastity and our power exchange. At least he’s suggested it. I don’t think he really wants to stop. I’m pretty sure this is a phase he goes through every now and then. Add his birthday into the mix and things can get a little volatile.
Several years ago, when Lion was turning the big mumble-0, he threw a mini tantrum because no one ever makes a big deal about his birthday. I wasn’t working at the time. I can’t remember what I had planned, but clearly it wasn’t enough. I had to borrow money to get him tickets to the opera. That was sufficient fanfare for him.
Over the years, he’s said birthdays don’t bother him. Uh huh. Right. It’s true that not all birthdays bother him. It’s not even the big mumble-0s necessarily that bother him. But some birthdays bother him. This one seems particularly trying. I bought him his favorite cake. Win. Finally made reservations for his favorite restaurant. Win. Failed to alert the restaurant that it was his birthday. Loss. (Normally he hates restaurant birthday celebrations but this year was a “no one ever makes a big deal” year.) Changed the reservation so I could alert them but also somehow changed the date to today. Overall loss. Managed to change the date back to last night. Mixed win-loss. Paid for dinner because who wants to pay for their own birthday dinner? Win (I think). Edged him a few times. Mixed win-loss. He still feels selfish for wanting sex when I don’t. And, even though I wished him a happy birthday this morning, I know he feels bad because he doesn’t know I have more things planned for him later. Not just sex things.
I did tell him he’d get birthday swats tonight. Other than an orgasm, which he doesn’t seem to want at the moment, I haven’t promised anything else. Not that he won’t get anything else. I just haven’t promised it. For the record, my intentions are to give him his birthday swats either before dinner or just after. And I’m hoping he’ll allow himself to enjoy the evening. [I will enjoy it! I am very grateful that Mrs. Lion cares so much about me.]
Orgasm Day
Today is the tenth day since my last orgasm and, if she is to be believed, the day I get off. Since I’ve been reflecting on my sexual assumptions, I’m not entirely sure that an orgasm is as much a goal as it used to be. Part of it is that I feel badly that I am the only one enjoying sex. Mrs. Lion remains uninterested in sex for herself.
I can’t quite shake the feeling that when she gets me off, she is doing it more out of obligation than pleasure. I realize this is a dark path to go down. Thinking this way can do no good for either of us. But I can’t shake this feeling. Mrs. Lion is quite cagey on the subject of what she gets out of teasing me and getting me off. I wrote about that the other day (click here to read that post).
I have no idea what she, or for that matter, I can do about it. But it is getting in my way. Last night, Mrs. Lion edged me a few times. It was nice and very exciting. But I couldn’t just get into it. I felt selfish.
This isn’t one of those posts where I come up with some insight about this. I don’t have one. At this point I feel lost and not very excited about a birthday orgasm.
A Pinch to Grow an Inch
Last night Lion pointed out that Monday is punishment night. It’s also his birthday. Hmmm. That hardly seems fair. The only swats he should get are birthday swats. So, on the fly, I instituted a new rule: if punishment night falls on a federal holiday or birthday, any swats accrued will be meted out on the following night. Phew! Crisis averted. That was a close one!
I can joke about it because I’m not a strict person. Whether punishment is given out on Monday or Tuesday makes little difference to me. There are many reasons why the day may have to change. Mondays are also one of Lion’s PT days. If he comes home dragging his arm behind him because he did a lot of painful exercises, I won’t add to his misery. If we eat too much on a Thursday night and both of us feel bloated and gross, I wouldn’t want to punish him. It would be uncomfortable for both of us. It’s a no-brainer to postpone things till Friday. Of course there’s nothing that says I have to limit punishment to either of those days. If Lion annoys me I can take care of things right then and there or as soon as we get home.
I’m not at all sure how many punishment days are affected by this new rule. Federal holidays are often on Mondays and Fridays as a way to extend weekends. If it becomes an issue, I can always change it back. It’s one of the perks of being in charge. Or I can make a loophole. Lawmakers are fond of loopholes. The rule is what I say it is, except when I say it’s different. There. A loophole.
Lion was all for the rule change. No punishment on his birthday. I don’t think either one of us thought about birthday swats at the time. I didn’t until I wrote it here. They’re different from punishment swats, of course. “Little” love taps. And don’t forget the pinch to grow an inch.
Horny!
Guys have developed an amazing mythology around being horny. When anyone is horny, he or she wants sexual release. It is another way of expressing an interest in sex. That’s it. It’s not a disease. There are no recorded cases of a male’s balls exploding from being unable to ejaculate.
Both men and women relieve being horny by masturbating if partner sex is unavailable. A lot of people like to be horny. It’s exciting and fun.
Teenage boys are famous for conning some form of sex out of girls by saying that they are in pain because they are horny. The girls aren’t smart enough yet to just tell the boy to jerk off and he will be fine.
Why do some guys want to wear a chastity device and be prevented from orgasmic release? I’m sure every woman whose partner has asked to be locked up has asked herself this question. If she realizes he is jerking off for do-it-yourself release, she might welcome the idea of locking him up. Mrs. Lion was surprised that I masturbated before my lockup.
She didn’t like the idea that anyone but her could make me ejaculate. Apparently, monogamy to her meant no one, including me could get me off. Other women don’t mind their husbands beating their meat. They might just feel he is doing a chore she would otherwise have to do. The simple fact is that we males don’t have to come. We can have an orgasm-free life with no serious problems.
I actually like being horny. If I am horny and edged, essentially I am enjoying sexual pleasure over an extended period of time. If Mrs. Lion gets me off, my interest in sex goes away for a while. Now, after four years of enforced chastity, my sexual interest is low for up to three days after ejaculating. My interest then grows until my next squirt.
The male orgasm really isn’t the goal. I know that we males think it is. But after thinking about it for a long time, I disagree. The race – the time I spend wanting an orgasm – is actually at least as much fun as the orgasm itself. In a way, ejaculating is just a way to restart the race. In my case, if I don’t have one, after a while my interest in sex goes down. I’m not claiming it is lost. It’s not. It just stops being something I think about very often. All that is needed is a brief session with the Magic Wand and my interest is high again.
This all came up in the context of Mrs. Lion’s comments about keeping me horny or getting me off. She prefers getting me off. She wonders why sometimes after I come, that I ask her why she didn’t make me wait. I think that in her mind, she is surprised I don’t share her enthusiasm for ejaculation. I would be crazy to say that I don’t. I love to come. But I also love waiting.
If she asks me if I want to come after she has brought me to the edge of ejaculation a few times, she has to realize I will always say yes. Similarly, if while she is spanking me, she asks if I want her to stop, of course I say I do. Both are honest answers in the heat of the moment. But if she asks me at a time when there is distance between the sensations, I may surprise her with my answer.
In the case of spanking, I know she can be considerably more severe. I think I want that. In terms of orgasms, it’s more difficult. Can I wait ten or twenty days? Yes, of course. Will I like it? No, absolutely not. Really? Well maybe I won’t exactly hate it. I don’t know.
Mrs. Lion seems to have an informal 7 day target for my orgasms. It’s fair. We never went for records. Am I ready to come now? Oh yes! I want to very badly. The edging I get nearly every day contributes to this desire. Does that mean I should get that orgasm? No, not necessarily. I won’t explode. It depends on how much fun Mrs. Lion has when I am bucking desperately trying to get that last little bit into heaven and then she says, “Not today.” If that’s fun, then she should enjoy it. But not too much.
