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In: Lion's Journal, Male Chastity, Sex

I finally return to work today. I admit that I am a bit nervous for a couple of reasons: The first is that I have been out of work for more than six months. Even though the struggle for a job is over, all those no’s have left scars. Second, my new employer is a much smaller company than my previous employers. I’m sure the culture will be considerably different. The last six months have taught me that it is much harder to land a job the older I get. I’ve been told that I sound much younger on the phone. That, along with my qualifications, have gotten me a lot of interviews. I could see in the hiring managers’ eyes that they expected a thirty-something and not me. I don’t look old, but I don’t look thirty or even forty. I think that’s the reason I am worried. It’s clear that if this job doesn’t work out, it is unlikely I will find another.

My concerns have affected my interest in sex. Saturday Mrs. Lion played with me. It felt good, but I just couldn’t get further. I’m writing this on Sunday afternoon. I know she will be trying again tonight. I hope that my interest will return. I’m still wild. Truth is, I am so used to the cage that I forget I am not wearing it. Only when I reach down to “adjust” do I remember there is no steel there. I don’t know when she will hand me the ring and I go back into my Jail Bird. Right now I’m not thinking about that at all.

When I was first locked up, I was surprised at how many guys writing posts or forum entries were unlocked. They were all practicing enforced chastity for several years. My chastity device was an exciting part of the way I felt about our new kink. I couldn’t understand how those other guys were still chaste if they weren’t caged all the time. Now I get it. After 20 months of being caged, the physical device is no longer required to assure that I will abstain. It surprises me that I have been so thoroughly conditioned. Does this mean that I no longer should be caged?

Mrs. Lion and I have spoken about this. I’ve given it a lot of thought. When we first started, the device assured that I wouldn’t masturbate. It also reminded Mrs. Lion that I was totally dependent on her for sexual attention. It also provided a tangible symbol of Mrs. Lion’s power that I couldn’t ignore. It worked perfectly for us. Now, we both understand that the cage is not needed to keep me from playing with myself or to remind Mrs. Lion to give me sexual attention. That’s working fine. I think the cage has a new contribution to us. It’s now a sexual tool that Mrs. Lion can use to provide positive and negative feedback to me as needed.

Let me explain. When I am locked up, it is clear that there is no chance of sex; none. If I am with Mrs. Lion and locked up, I understand that unless she takes the key out, sex isn’t happening. When I am wild, she can see if I am obviously interested. True, she can still ignore my arousal, but historically she yields to temptation. I also have to admit I like the feeling that I have no choice about sex. When I am wild, even though I wouldn’t, I have the ability to jerk off. When I am locked up, there is no chance for that or anything else. OK, OK, it’s also a kink of mine. I love bondage. The chastity device is sexual bondage. ‘Nuff said.

But there is a different feeling about being locked up around here. Mrs. Lion can reward me by letting me stay wild for a while. She can also let me know if she is less than thrilled by not unlocking me for a few days. There is a cost if she does leave me locked. When she finally decides to play with me, it will be more difficult to get me aroused. At least that is our experience so far. The chastity device is evolving in the way we use it. Exactly how Mrs. Lion decides to treat it has yet to be revealed. Stay tuned.

By:
In: Mrs Lion Comments, Sex

Saturday night, as I was edging Lion, I really wanted to give him an orgasm. I know it wasn’t his scheduled date. And I know he had a bonus orgasm coming, so to speak. But I decided I was jumping the gun. He couldn’t be horny enough to warrant an orgasm yet. Could he? He was very hard. He seemed very horny. Clearly he wanted release. But it hadn’t been a long enough wait.

By last night I decided to give him his bonus orgasm. Who cares how long he’s waited? Well, he does, but I mean if I want to give him an orgasm, who cares? He’s certainly not going to argue with me for giving him one. There’s no one else in the relationship to argue. I know some of our readers think Lion is the luckiest guy in the world for having so many orgasms. He does too. But others are thinking we’re doing it all wrong. He can’t possibly be locked up and still be having all these orgasms. Says who?

What if I decide that, based on his reaction to teasing, he’ll get more orgasms than are scheduled? Suppose tomorrow he’s really horny again and when I edge him he’s bucking off the bed like he needs to come or he’ll burst anyway? If I ask Lion he’ll say it’s up to me. Yes! Yes, it is.

It’s been a while since I’ve wanted to give Lion extra orgasms. It’s been a while since he’s been this horny. I say I need to strike while the Lion is hot. He’s not going to get one every night. That would be too much. I won’t even commit to every three days or four days. I will commit to giving him one if I decide to take one. Trust me, when I decide to take one, he will be more than willing to let me. He will be way more than ready. I won’t take one if he isn’t. That’s not the point.

The point is that I love to give Lion orgasms when he’s very horny. Not all the time. Sometimes it’s fun to watch him suffer, let him get limp, and hand him his ring to put on. But sometimes, when he’s very hard, I just need to give him release. There’s a certain power in that, too.

By:
In: Keyholder, Keyholder101, Lion's Journal, Male Chastity, Sex

For the record, I am not broken. We are still high on a mountain, far from Internet and cell phone service. This post is being written on a lazy Sunday morning. It’s cloudy with generous patches of blue showing. Saturday night, Mrs. Lion once again proved that I’m not broken. With a bit of effort she edged me several times. As usual, I couldn’t count how many. I was busy. My focus becomes laser sharp as my body prepares for the orgasm that isn’t going to come. Tomorrow, Labor Day in the U.S., is my scheduled orgasm day. Appropriate.

Based on my touring the various blogs and forums, a great many guys writing about enforced chastity belong to the set-it-and-forget-it school of chastity. As they say it, the idea is that the penis is locked in a device and left there until some future date when it comes out for an orgasm. The theory is that a long wait without any stimulation will create an almost unbearable need for sexual release. According to them, male sexual desire grows constantly during a wait for the next orgasm.

The reason they believe this comes from typical male behavior, including mine in the past. Most guys, when unable to find a partner, will masturbate. In my case, in my twenties and thirties, jerking off would be the last thing I did before going to sleep. When I had a partner, she replaced the masturbation at the end of my day. This is fairly typical. So, logically if I am prevented from getting release, my sexual battery will continue charging indefinitely until I either explode or have a nocturnal emission. It seems reasonable.

When guys, like me, first try enforced chastity, the frustration is terrible and grows each day just as predicted. The first wait is not very long and release is great. Even when the waits grow longer, the theory seems to hold true. Most of the “I am going to explode” posts are written by guys who haven’t been involved in enforced chastity very long. Things change.

After being locked up for a while, the set-it-and-forget-it guys start to discover they don’t really care so much about orgasms. In my case after about six months, the horniness grew for the first few days, peaking on the fifth. Then my interest becomes less and less. If you think about it, this isn’t really surprising. Women famously lose interest in sex when none is available. I always thought that males were different and remained horny as a preservation of the species sort of sexual strategy. I was wrong.

Depending on age, interest in sex declines when none, including masturbation, isn’t available. By fifty, a week or so of no stimulation will result in a significant loss of interest in orgasm. If the waits stretch into months, orgasms (according to at least 30 accounts I have read) begin to feel undesirable. Guys say they don’t want to come because they feel depressed for days after an orgasm. In short, not coming becomes more desirable than ejaculating.

Most men, including those not practicing enforced chastity, will lose interest in sex as they age. People are generally surprised when they learn a seventy-year-old still has regular sex. Enforced chastity without very regular teasing accelerates this loss of interest and men under forty find themselves no longer wanting to ejaculate.

If you are a keyholder, this information is critically important. Without meaning to do it, you can train your male to lose all interest in his own orgasms. You can easily train him to have the same interest in your orgasms than he used to have in his own. This sounds desirable from a D/S perspective, but in fact it is suboptimal. As a top or keyholder, the best use of his sexuality is to keep him extremely interested in release; so interested he will do anything just for the possibility of an orgasm. Contrary to popular belief, this is achieved by regular edging and sexual teasing. The idea is to keep male hormones flowing full force even though there is no chance for relief.

This is achieved by building anticipation. There are lots of ideas out there on how to do it. Edging at least three times a week is a good way. Also, at least for me, letting me know when I will come next builds anticipation. I count down the days. Mrs. Lion teases and edges me nearly every day. Does that seem like too much trouble? It takes less than 30 minutes a day. You don’t even have to take your clothes off. At a convenient time tell him strip. He does need to be naked. Then tease and edge him several times. Verbally teasing him will add to his anticipation. That’s it. That’s Mrs. Lion’s 30 minute lion teasing regime. It works. My next orgasm is never far from the front of my mind. I need to keep Mrs. Lion happy because the last thing I want to do is wait longer than I have to.

 

By:
In: Keyholder, Lion's Journal, Sex

It’s Saturday morning at a campsite high on a mountainside near the Columbia River. There’s no cell service here, so we have to hunt for a place to upload our posts. We’ll probably go to the nearest town (fifteen miles away) and use the cell service to upload posts. The Columbia is the most dammed river in the world. We are planning to drive to Portland Oregon to get some donuts. Are you kidding? Donuts! Well, yes. The Pacific Northwest is devoid of good donuts and Pizza. Voodoo Donuts are the best we have ever eaten, including Dunkin’. There are no Dunkin’ Donuts between Canada and California.

Happily, our satellite antenna could find the mothership, so we could enjoy some TV. It was cloudy and rainy when we got here and cleared up after dark. We are over 4,000 up near the top of a mountain pass. It’s generally colder here than it is at lower altitude. We brought some warm clothes. Mrs. Lion tends to be warmer than I. She’s been running around in a t-shirt. In the trailer so was I; but that’s all.

Last night we were both tired and I was cold. Our trailer has great heat, but for some reason I just couldn’t warm up. I wasn’t horny at all. Mrs. Lion kindly put off play. As usual on our camping adventures, I am wild. That feels nice, but no sexual feelings at all. I wonder if Mrs. Lion will remember the restraints on our bed. We only used them once this summer. We tripped over them last night when we changed the sheets; at least I did. I tripped over one.

Mrs. Lion always teases me when I tell her I am broken. It has been four days since my last orgasm. I should be showing some interest. Mrs. Lion is confident she can revive me. I know she can. Actually, the fact that she can arouse me when I have no interest in sex is a meaningful demonstration of her sexual control. Most guys think of enforced chastity as the keyholder preventing orgasm no matter how much her man wants to come. Not too many realize that forcing the male to become aroused when not interested in sex is probably an even stronger expression of her power.

You’re probably thinking, “I always want to come. That’s no demonstration of keyholder power.” Oh yeah? What if she tells you that she will make you orgasm every hour, or even half hour for an entire weekend? That’s right, from the time you wake up until she lets you go to sleep, every hour she will make you come. It’s fun for the first few times, but eventually your penis will be sore and you have no semen left. Before bedtime the first night you will be begging to not come. But since she is the boss, you know that as soon as the alarm goes off in the morning, she will go back to work. One weekend like this will cure you of the belief that there is no such thing as too much sex. You will beg to be locked up again.

Mrs. Lion understood this and taught me that lesson when we first started enforced chastity. She decided to take an orgasm every day. In a few days I dreaded the nightly orgasm. She was kind and let me off the hook. She isn’t all that kind anymore. During the last months she has been extremely kind to me. She knows how upset I have been about my lack of success getting work. I am in an industry that thinks forty is old. We live in the epicenter of the high tech industry. I was sure we were doomed to bankruptcy and poverty. I think she secretly thought so too. We may have gotten an eleventh-hour reprieve.

Now that I have a job, Mrs. Lion can go back to less sympathetic exercise of her power. She’s armed with a new orgasm-provoking weapon: the Magic Wand vibrator. Her hands and mouth are already amazing at extracting arousal and orgasm. Now she has a power tool. It’s got a good charge, but she left the charger at home so her nuclear option is a bit limited.