By:
In: Punishment, Rules

I’m annoyed with Lion right now. He doesn’t know it. I haven’t told him. I was trying to figure out how to ease into the first issue without it seeming like I’m attacking Lion. He goes on the defensive quickly. And now there’s another issue that has my panties in a bunch. Right now he’s writing his post so I don’t want to interrupt him, but we’ll discuss things when we’re both done writing.

The thing is, I see myself falling into old habits. I’ve been annoyed at the mountain of tasks I have to do. I knew I’d be doing the majority of the tasks while Lion recuperates, but it just seems like there’s always something that needs to be done. For example, I don’t remember us running the dishwasher so often before his surgery. I’m always emptying it. And when did we become the largest garbage generator in town. The bag is always full and I need to take it out. I’m not blaming Lion for not being able to do anything. He’s pitching in where he can. [Lion – Before the surgery, I took out the garbage almost all the time. Mrs. Lion didn’t realize that. We have always run the dishwasher daily. I think it is that poor Mrs. Lion is doing everything now, she is feeling the pressure.]

If I wasn’t annoyed by this mountain of tasks, I don’t think I would be so annoyed by the other two things, which are largely due to lack of communication. It’s a snowball effect and I understand how easy it is for things to fester inside me. I haven’t said anything about the long list of tasks because it’s not Lion’s fault. I have to get off my ass and do things rather than sit around falling asleep with him. It annoys me even more when Lion points out something that needs to be done. “Wow! That’s a lot of recycle to go out.” “If I was driving my car, I’d get it washed. I hate a dirty car.” And when I said I need to move around rather than sit with him so I stay awake he said, “You could always clean.” Apparently 2.0 is off on vacation somewhere. Any one of those statements should have warranted a notch on the bedpost for future punishment. But they didn’t. Instead, I hold it in and let it simmer.

Well, today it’s boiling over. Either 2.0 is spending Memorial Day weekend with us or 1.0 finally woke up. If he can drive his car and plan to go back to the office full time, then he can handle some punishment. He wondered when punishment would resume. Right here. Right now. It’s on.

By:
In: Punishment, Rewards

I guess I had a “eureka” moment the other day when I came up with my penny idea. I’m not sure why it took me so long to figure out that if I want Lion to have rewards, I just have to give them to him rather than give him the option to take them. To a point, I understand his point of view. If he decides when to get a reward, then he has a certain amount of power.

However, if I want to give him a reward, there’s no guarantee he’ll be receptive to it. Well, that all depends on the reward. I don’t think he’ll ever turn down the chance to not be punished for gaining weight. He might turn down an orgasm if he isn’t in the mood, but never a punishment reprieve. So I just have to make sure the rewards are something he wants no matter what.

I have to decide how many pennies Lion has to have to earn a reward. Should it be different for each reward? Does a punishment reprieve on a regular punishment night cost more or less than a punishment reprieve for not losing weight? Of course, I’ve only thought of those two rewards so far. There may be more as we go along. And we’ll have to see how fast he accumulates (and loses) pennies. If I decide he needs ten pennies to avoid the gaining weight punishment, but he never gets there, we’ll be done before we start. What happens if he has one penny and is rude to me? Can the balance ever go negative?

Rules are frustrating. Not just for the recipient. The rule maker has to figure out every angle. Not that Lion will try to find a loophole. There are just a lot of “what if”s. And then I have to keep my eyes open. It’s not like I have a speed camera that will snap a picture of Lion being rude and automatically mail him a ticket. Wouldn’t that be a great invention, though? Nah. It would take the personal investment out of the equation.

Naturally, Lion and I will work through the details and when we find something missing, we’ll try to fix it. Nothing we’ve tried has worked out perfectly the first time around. Isn’t that part of the fun of doing it?

By:
In: Punishment

I have a friend who is in her late 70s. She’s known for doing the unexpected. I got an email from her the other day and she said she’s been recovering from a knee injury she suffered while line dancing. Line dancing! I can imagine her doing it too. She probably leaves much younger people in the dust. I told her about Lion’s shoulder and she said she’s known many older people who’ve had the surgery. The biggest thing is to follow the physical therapy even beyond the point you feel healed, otherwise you can get into trouble. One more vote in the Lion-should-have-the-surgery column.

We continue to get ready for his surgery. We’re taking care of things that need to be done before he becomes in-valid, as he likes to pronounce it. We still have a ways to go but we’ll be ready. And, along the way, I’m finding projects that I can do while I’m home taking care of him. Those things that you wish you had time for. Well, I may actually have time for them.

Lion mentioned sex after surgery. As long as we protect his shoulder, he should be good to go. The issue, of course, is that the pain pills also make Mr. Weenie groggy. Personally, I think sex will be the last thing on his mind for at least the first week. But I never know. Like my friend, Lion is known for doing the unexpected.

The other night I remembered to spank Lion for not losing weight. He gained .8 pounds so he got 8 not-so-terrible swats. They hurt, but not as much as they should have. I took it easy on him on purpose. He’d been dreading it all day. I gained weight too so I figured I didn’t have a leg to stand on. Of course, I’m in charge so there’s that. We just need to jump back on the diet bandwagon and start exercising too. That will save Lion’s butt.

By:
In: Lion's Journal, Punishment

For guys who fantasize about male chastity, one of the most popular stories is about the stern keyholder extending the time for his next orgasm due to misbehavior. It’s no secret that those of us who like the idea of wearing  a chastity device are turned on thinking that their wait for the next orgasm will be extended if they displease their keyholder. I admit that I’m turned on by that fantasy. But I know there is a huge problem with doing this in the real world.

In sexual play, temporary frustration of either partner is amazing fun. Males, in particular, love being edged. I my case, edging is over 90% of the sexual activity that I have. On most days, Mrs. Lion edges me several times and then leaves me frustrated. When I am wearing my chastity device, Mrs. Lion puts it back on as soon as I get soft. It stays in place until the next time she wants to tease me. The same routine applies if I am wild.

I like this process. I look forward to the edging sessions. It’s my fantasy come true. If Mrs. Lion then “punishes” me by withholding orgasm and teasing for a period of time, then it feeds my fantasy. It certainly isn’t a punishment.

Maybe we should consider the idea of punishment. Sexual play frequently makes use of that word. Role play includes punishing a naughty child, employee, student, etc. The punishment is some thing the “punishee” wants. Yes, it might hurt or be frustrating, but it is arousing and satisfying to both people. The bottom wants to experience the sensations and frustration.

Clearly, the word “punishment” has a very different meaning in the context of real discipline. Punishment in the classic sense, is the infliction or imposition of a penalty as retribution for an offense. The person being punished gets no pleasure from the punishment.

In our house, Mrs. Lion generally spanks me when I commit an offense. I know what you are thinking. I get turned on by spanking. Yes, in the play sense I do. The idea of a play spanking makes me hard. It’s a turn on. Punishment spanking is something I try my best to avoid. The idea might be a turn on, but the reality is pure pain. Mrs. Lion hits me hard enough to make me scream. This is true from the first swat to the last. If I started out feeling turned on, by swat number two, all I want is for her to stop. I never do anything to provoke a punishment.

Based on my description, can’t sexual punishments be real too? What if the “sentence” for an offense is an additional month of uninterrupted wear of my chastity device? Wouldn’t that go well past the point when the idea is a turn on?  It might be for me. I suppose the idea of this sort of penalty is exciting, but I don’t think the reality would be that much fun.

Continuous lockup may be self defeating. It can have one of two possible effects. The one the fantasies tout is that horniness will increase every day. It will become painful to be denied. If that’s true, then I am sure being so horny is fun. What guy doesn’t like feeling that way? The second effect is that interest in sex will drop off and whether the device is on or now will cease to matter.

This is profoundly different from punishment spanking. Long lock up may not be as much fun as the fantasy, but let’s face it, sexual arousal is not a deterrent to anything. The idea of a spanking is arousing to me. But no matter how horny I am, the actual spanking is just painful and not a bit sexual. Other classic punishments like mouth soaping, corner time, writing assignments, etc. may be arousing to think about, but very quickly become horrible.

Sexual punishment just doesn’t work as a deterrent. It’s part of the game. The real, domestic-discipline punishments are true deterrents to repeat offenses. Withholding orgasms is just part of the game. See the difference?