By:
In: CBT

Not much has been going on around here. We spent a quiet weekend puttering around the house. I’ve managed to stay out of trouble for over twenty days. At least, I think I have. Mrs. Lion may have lost some of her laser focus on my behavior. Since I decided to seek medical help for my erectile dysfunction (ED), Mrs. Lion hasn’t made a serious effort to either tease me or get me off. I think it might be worth a shot to try. I’m not completely broken.

We’ve driven over 400 miles in our new car and bought less than four gallons of gas. The gas tank is still 86 percent full. That means we’ve used just another 1 1/2 gallons of gas. Very cool. Gas is expensive here, near $5.00 a gallon. Electricity is cheap. We pay about twelve cents per kilowatt-hour. A full charge uses 12.4 kilowatt-hours. That translates to $1.48 for a full charge that takes us 33 miles. The math is easy.  Our car gets 30 miles/gallon when running as a hybrid. So, each time we run on electricity, we are paying only $1.50 instead of $5 for gas. Enough car talk.

non-sexual erections

One feature of the injectable that creates an erection is that sexual arousal isn’t needed at all. Inject the drug into the penis and, voila, it gets hard and stays hard for an hour or more. Every erection I’ve ever had came with sexual arousal. I’m having trouble imagining what it will feel like if I’m not aroused and still have a solid woody. Imagine having an orgasm and instead of getting soft as sexual energy drops, your penis stays as hard as it was when you started. I’m having trouble wrapping my head around this concept.

In a very real sense, this drug-induced erection is truly Mrs. Lion’s toy. It’s available for service regardless of my interest. It’s a living dildo that happens to be attached to me. There’s no need to worry about my interest. The penis will stay hard until the drug wears off. According to the prescribing information, that erection can safely last up to four hours. Whew! The package insert for the drug says that if the erection remains for six hours, medical assistance is needed to prevent permanent damage.

Think about it. Control of my primary sexual equipment is taken from me. I wouldn’t expect Mrs. Lion to do it often, but she can order me to administer the drug and then make use of my penis any way she wants. This has to be the most primal power exchange. Once that drug is in my penis, it will get hard and stay hard with or without my cooperation. Before this drug, I had to be aroused to be hard, so painful penis play had to keep pace with my arousal and increased ability to accept pain.

That will no longer be true. My hard cock remains at attention and available, with absolutely no need for me to cooperate. That can make things very uncomfortable for me. It can also be a lot of fun for both of us. It’s a brave new world of cock and ball torture.

By:
In: Sex

We did nothing this weekend. I tried Saturday night, but Lion said it was too late. He’d been sleeping earlier in the evening. I could have woke him up, but I hate to do that. Last night, he seemed involved with a TV show. Yes, he could have paused it. I moved over and we held hands.

Around 10, he asked why I didn’t snuggle. I pointed out that I moved over. He said all I did was hold hands. I think it all comes down to initiation again. If I move over, does that mean I’m initiating? If he asks me to snuggle, does that mean he’s initiated? If I rub my weenie under the covers, is that initiating?

Lion thinks I’m not playing with him because there’s no possibility of erection. For all I knew, he might not have gotten an erection any of the times we played in the past. Sometimes he did. Sometimes he didn’t. I think we’ve just had poor timing lately. And poor initiation.

While Lion is in the shower this afternoon, I’ll change the bed. Once he gets warmed up after his shower, I’ll see if I can get my weenie to stand up for me. Maybe I’ll tie his balls up to get him in the mood. My goal is to get him excited. The problem is that I don’t want to keep trying if he isn’t getting there. I don’t want to annoy him.

Now, on to the weenie injections. Lion says he’ll be available for all of my sexual needs once he’s hard. What sexual needs? As far as I’m concerned, since I don’t have any, he already meets my sexual needs. Yes, I do want him to have erections because I want to play with him. I want cream filling. I don’t need orgasms for me. If he’s hard, I can ride him for his own orgasm, not mine.

Since I’m on the subject, does the injection guarantee an orgasm? Or is it just more likely to have one because he’s able to stay erect? There have been times that he’s been hard, but still unable to have an orgasm. Is it two different mechanisms?

By:
In: Erections

We are alive and well. Mrs. Lion is outside taking care of some needed chores. I spent Friday afternoon goofing off. I watched a Metropolitan Opera performance of the Magic Flute from 2006. It was in English. That’s very odd for the Met. They almost never perform operas in translation. When we lived in New York, I subscribed to the Met and went to seven performances a year. I’m a little bit of an opera snob. The Seattle Opera doesn’t compare well with the Met. Mrs. Lion gave me a subscription to the Met Online as a gift. It’s wonderful to see opera again. We have an excellent sound system and a great TV. It’s a true pleasure to see opera again.

Not much is going on in the sex department. If Mrs. Lion feels well enough, we might have some fun today. It’s been twenty days since my last orgasm. I’ve been thinking a lot about my sexual performance. I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes over 25 years ago. At almost the same time, I sometimes lost my erection during intercourse. It didn’t happen often, but I remember when it did. I also couldn’t get it up at all on a few other occasions.

This grew worse until about ten years ago, I could only stay hard if I were on my back. Mrs. Lion rode me cowgirl style. We both liked it and I attributed my change to force of habit. I was on my back for teasing and handjobs as well as fucking. I reasoned that I simply “forgot” how to stay hard at other times. I guess I was in denial. First, Viagra and then Cialis helped me get hard almost the entire time I experienced this issue. Cialis still works a little. I often lose my erection mid-blowjob. It’s been more and more difficult for Ms. Lion to get me off.

I’m glad that I finally decided to consult a doctor. Maybe all those times I complained about being broken, I was telling the truth. The problem wasn’t some sort of male cycle. It was erectile dysfunction. It’s been difficult to admit that I am actually broken. I’m hopeful that the urologist will be able to help with Edex, the injection that delivers erections. My consultation is this coming Thursday. With any luck, I’ll be hard again soon after.

By:
In: Erections

This is my first post since I’ve been feeling under the weather. It started with sudden-onset diarrhea and vomiting. Yuck. I used some powerful meds to control the runs to the bathroom. It took another twelve hours to get under control. For the last two days, I’ve slept twelve hours and then spent the rest of the day in bed. I’ve been exhausted. I have no idea what caused this. There is no fever. The only serious risk is dehydration. I’ve been trying to add liquids as much as I can. Mrs. Lion has a theory that it may be a reaction to eating raw pineapple. Her guess is as good as any. I have no idea.

As Mrs. Lion mentioned in her post, “Lion Update,” I have a video consultation with a urologist next Thursday afternoon. I suppose this appointment is years late. While I’ve been able to get hard, my ability to stay hard has been poor for years. I’m not happy about admitting that I have erectile dysfunction (ED), but I do. For the record, this has nothing to do with wearing a male chastity device. It has no effect on a man’s ability to get erections. In a way, it was a good cover for my inability to get hard, but it wasn’t how I thought about male chastity at all. If anything, wearing the device made it easier for me to get aroused.

I’ve been researching treatments for erectile dysfunction. I’ve tried the Viagra and Cialis tablets. Both worked up to a point. Viagra stopped some time ago. Cialis was effective for a while, but it has also proven less than satisfactory. The next, and probably last option is alprostadil. It’s an injectable drug that is injected directly into the penis. That sounds drastic, but from what I’ve read, it’s generally painless and very safe. That’s what the consultation with the urologist is about.

This treatment is interesting in that sexual arousal isn’t necessary for it to work. The drug reacts directly with the spongy tissue in the penis and relaxes it, allowing it to fill with blood. An erection results and persists for about an hour. Sex isn’t involved. There are interesting CBT possibilities with that. I don’t think Mrs. Lion has much interest in that aspect, but she will enjoy a rock-hard penis again. I know I will.