We talked a little bit yesterday about what I wanted Lion to do rather than just lay there. The problem is, I don’t know. He said he’s sort of stuck in position by the bed. Our Sleep Number bed isn’t as bad as sinking into a memory foam mattress, which left us feeling like turtles stuck on our backs, but it tends to keep you in place. I’m not even sure I was thinking about him moving anywhere. I think it was more of an attention thing. With the TV on (not muted, not paused), I guess I felt like he was distracted. That’s one reason I hate spending so much time in bed. We’re just always there. I feel like I’m competing for TV time and whatever else is going on. I also wonder if Lion would be snoozing so much if we watched TV in the living room.

Regardless of that, I moved over to snuggle and started playing with my weenie. He was responding, but he wasn’t getting quite as hard as I would have liked. When I sat up to play with him, I really didn’t want to use my hand. We’ve been experimenting to see if I can still edge him with my hand. In the back of my mind, I thought it was the best of both worlds. If I can give him an orgasm by hand, I have the option of keeping it for myself or making Lion eat it. He hates it, so obviously, it’s something I do from time to time. However, I miss sucking him. I shared that with Lion, and he graciously suggested I should do it. What a guy! I mean, what a nightmare having a woman suck your cock.

I managed to edge him at least three times. He was very close for two of them. Then he sort of lost it. I think it still felt good, but he wasn’t as hard. Unwilling to give up on him, I kept going. I thought maybe I could revive him. He doesn’t always stop. Sometimes I’ve just let him come down too much, and more sucking gets him hard again. Not this time. I asked if he was broken. He said he wasn’t, but we weren’t getting anywhere. Then my arm started to fall asleep. You know, once that happens, it’s very hard to get that tingling to stop. But I had to.

I don’t know how long it has been since I edged Lion. I don’t even know how long it’s been since I sucked him. I think I’ll continue to prime the pump with my hand and follow up with my mouth. It seems to work best for both of us.

[Lion — I’m sure I will regret this comment. If Mrs. Lion wants to feed me semen and she is using her mouth, she can kiss it to me after I have come.]

Today is a somber day. I just want to take a moment to remember those who were affected by the attacks on 9/11. Lion and I were living in New York, although we were not together at the time. His then-girlfriend was in Manhattan, trying to get out. My then-husband was on the last train that made it to the World Trade Center PATH station. It was hours before I heard from him. It was even longer before he made it out of Manhattan. I have no idea what it’s like for the families who lost loved ones or for the people who made it out alive, but I do know the memory of the planes hitting the towers and the towers falling will always be with me. The other two crashes were tragic too, but being in New York and having been to the World Trade Center on many occasions is the most vivid memory for me.

We decided late yesterday afternoon to pick up Lion’s replacement glasses. We were going and then decided not to, but when the subject of dinner came up, we decided we could pick up KFC on the way back from getting the glasses. We didn’t get home until about 8. By the time we ate and settled in, it was pretty much too late to do anything sexual. Lion was snoozing off and on. It just wasn’t a sexy night.

Today we are off to run errands. We’ll get an earlier start, and we should be home in plenty of time for dinner and subsequent activities. Assuming he snoozes a bit along the way, Lion should be awake enough to participate. I won’t let another night go by without at least trying to arouse him. My weenie needs frequent exercise. It’s been a few days since he’s been interested. I can’t remember when I got him hard last. I am determined to do it tonight.

Sometimes Lion doesn’t want sex. I know! That doesn’t sound right at all. It does happen from time to time. He immediately thinks he’s broken. I immediately think I’m doing something wrong. Neither of us is right. There’s just a lull in the action. No harm, no foul.

Usually, I think, lack of Lion sex drive means he hasn’t been getting enough bondage or other attention. However, last night was the night after a spanking. Admittedly, it wasn’t a great spanking. He didn’t feel it at all the next day. I blame that on the leather paddle. It’s fine for warm-up, but it doesn’t send enough of a message. I should have used the spoon-shaped paddle more. It would have made things bloodier, but he would have had trouble sitting yesterday and possibly today.

What can we do about Lion not being horny? I keep trying. Sooner or later, I’ll hit upon something he likes enough to get him hard. This is not a case of absence making the heart grow fonder. I won’t say it’s work in the sense of toiling away at it, but it is something we have to work at. It’s an I-know-you’re-in-there-you-silly-erection type of thing. I’ve just got to figure out how to coax it out. Don’t worry. I have my ways.

Lion is probably feeling selfish again. He does this somewhat frequently. He’ll feel he’s taking advantage of me. He’s not. He’ll feel sorry for himself that he can’t have vaginal sex. That one is particularly silly. He can have it. I sometimes offer, albeit rarely. He tells me not to bother because it does nothing for me. So? If it’s something I can do to make him feel good, and I’m willing to do it, shut up, and let’s go for it. If I told him his next orgasm would be vaginal, would my weenie spring into action immediately? Schwing!

The other day, while I was waxing Lion, he got very excited when I started jerking him off. I had a lot of oil on him. Things were very slippery. I noticed that he seemed to be at the perfect height. My back wasn’t hurting. However, I had another side of Lion to wax so I couldn’t dawdle.

That night, he said he was amazed at how excited he’d gotten. He theorized that it was a combination of the oil and the angle that did it. I decided to see if we could recreate it in the bedroom. It wasn’t really a surprise when we couldn’t. First of all, I wasn’t using oil. It was a water based lube. I’m not sure if silicone based would have worked better or not. Maybe it really does have to be oil. The second problem was the angle. I was sitting next to him. I was twisted and my back was starting to hurt. Standing next to him was worse.

I’ve suggested we could use the waxing table again to see if we can recreate his excitement. Getting oil all over the place isn’t an issue and the angle will be better. I also realized I don’t know which hand I was using. Lion wondered what the difference was. I think it depends on whether my fingertips are on the bottom or top of his penis. On the bottom, they can hit all the good spots.

Aside from the oil and angle, I wonder if the change of scenery made him excited. Maybe it was the fact that I was touching him all over when I applied the oil to get residual wax off. It could be any number of things. It will be fun trying to figure out what works. I love experimenting on Lion. He’s such a willing test subject.