By:
In: Chastity hardware, Lion's Journal

Now that I am back in the Jail Bird after about a month of being wild, I can’t say that I am delighted about being caged again. There’s a lot to be said for being wild. It’s certainly more comfortable. While I usually forget I am caged, there are times when I wear jeans and I’m sitting at my desk that I get a little pinch. It’s easy to adjust away, but it is a sharp reminder that I am locked up. The other big advantage to being wild is that I can get hard. I like how an erection feels. What a surprise! I must be the only male in the world who feels that way.

Ok, thank you captain obvious. There’s something about morning wood or an occasional unauthorized erection that feels really nice. Most males take that for granted. I certainly don’t. I also like the ease of peeing standing up. At work, using a urinal while in the cage is always an opportunity to spray all over the floor, wall, and my pants. I carry a Q-Tip in my shirt pocket to adjust if the urethra isn’t properly centered. I also carry a tissue to clean up the inevitable drips on my balls.

I recognize that these inconveniences are just part of the power exchange, but they do wear on me. While I was wild, Mrs. Lion was considering extending my lack of cage indefinitely. She correctly reasoned that I have been conditioned to not masturbate. It’s true. I’ve lost the desire to do that. I prefer being horny than relieving it myself. Mrs. Lion never lets me self stimulate when we play. All sexual contact is with her.

I wondered whether the lack of the cage would subtly change things. The teasing sessions didn’t let up when I was wild. I don’t think anything between us changed at all. Is the cage only needed as an aid to condition me sexually? Once we established new sexual patterns, is the cage just a symbol that I wear like my wedding ring? If that’s true, does it make sense to remain locked given the inconveniences it creates?

In contrast, my wedding ring is not inconvenient at all. Nothing I do changes if it is on or off. Of course it is always on. I treasure it’s meaning. I’m pretty sure that Mrs. Lion likes seeing it on my finger. I love seeing the ring on hers. Is the cage the same? I wonder how she feels when she looks down and sees it locked in place. I’m divided on my reaction. When I see myself wearing it in the mirror, half the time I get a very warm feeling seeing the symbol of Mrs. Lion’s ownership. The other half of the time I growl softly and think about the inconveniences it causes me.

When I was wild, I liked seeing the penis. When uncaged, it is usually longer than when confined. I think it looks good on me. Carefree peeing felt like a gift. In the shower, cleaning is a bit easier. I never got hard when washing. The cage trained me, I guess. I wonder if all that would revert back to my pre-cage penis reactions after a long period without the cage. Would the conditioning fade and eventually disappear? I don’t know. At this point, I don’t want to find out. Of course, if Mrs. Lion lets me go wild again, should the conditioning show any sign of fading, the cage could go back on in a flash. She’d have to be vigilant to observe the first sign of slippage.

I wanted to be locked up again this time. I don’t trust that all the goodness we get from enforced chastity is going to continue if the cage is gone for very long. I know from experience over the years I have been caged that we do very well together. Is the cage the reason? Or, is it what we learned by using the cage as a training aid? What do you think?

By:
In: Femdom, Mrs Lion Comments

Yesterday, Lion went out to get a haircut while I stayed home to clean the house for company coming today. We don’t normally have company over and we are very lax when it comes to cleaning, so I had a lot of work to do. I realized that we were nearing lunchtime so I decided to text Lion and have him bring home food. I told him what I wanted and he dutifully brought it to me. Why is this a big deal? Well, ordinarily I would just find something at home to eat or Lion would suggest going back out for lunch. But this time I actually told him what I wanted. Maybe lunch is a little request but that fact that I made the request was huge for me.

Later on, since I had been cleaning all day, Lion suggested going out to eat. I didn’t really want to go out, but I also didn’t really want to cook the meal I had planned. I decided to take Lion’s suggestion and we went out to eat. Again, a small decision, but a decision nonetheless. And when I came out of the shower, I told Lion I’d made another decision. He’d had an orgasm the night before so I wasn’t going to unlock him. Instead, we’d snuggle for a while. No play. No teasing. Just snuggling. And why is that a big deal? Aside from yet another decision (not my strong point, obviously) I let Lion know ahead of time that there would be no play. Sometimes he gets his hopes up and then gets frustrated because we don’t do anything. He’s said if I just tell him we won’t be playing he can handle it much better. Win, win, win.

The point is that I’m trying to grow as a top. Lion’s hope is that I will take the skills I use as a top and transfer them to my work life in the form of standing up for myself. Actually he wants me to transfer them to my whole life. We’ll see how it all shakes out. For now, I’ll settle for being a better top for him.

By:
In: Chastity device fitting, Lion's Journal

I like new things and I like to tinker. If you’ve been reading our blog for any time, you know that. I started trying male chastity devices about twenty years ago when I decided to review them. I quickly learned that fit made the difference between being wearable and pure pain. When I decided I wanted to surrender my sexuality, I had a lot of experience with chastity devices. I selected a custom-made Jail Bird by Mature Metal. Their devices offer a wide range of customization. Based on prior experience and very careful measuring, I believed that a 1-3/4 inch diameter base ring would be secure and comfortable. I was right. The initial cage was 1/2 inch too long. After I had that shortened, I have the device I wear to this day.

One thing bothered me a little. I could get more than one knuckle of my 2nd finger under the base ring where it goes over the center of my penis. The rule of thumb is that you should only be able to get up to the first knuckle of that finger anywhere under the ring if the fit is right and the device is secure. I had been wearing the Jail Bird for almost two years at that point. I had read that somehow the area the ring covers will shrink over time. So, I jumped to the conclusion that I lost some size there.

So, I ordered a 1-5/8 inch ring from Mature Metal. That is the next smaller standard size. When it arrived, Mrs. Lion unlocked me and we substituted the new, smaller ring. The next day I was in pain. The new ring irritated me and I was red and sore. Mrs. Lion put me back in the original 1-3/4 inch ring. All was well again.

Imagine that? Just a change in size of 1/8th inch diameter was enough to change the device from perfectly comfortable to miserable. When you consider that all the off-the-shelf devices offer only 1/4 inch size differences, it seems that it would be easy to get a ring truly too large or too small with no ability to find the right size. I was surprised such a small change would have such a dramatic result. The bigger surprise was yet to come.

I ordered a custom, 1-11/16 inch ring. That is only 1/16th inch smaller than the comfortable 1-3/4 inch ring. I reasoned that I wouldn’t even notice such a small change in size again. Boy, was I wrong! The 1 11/16th  inch ring irritated me after only one night of wear. I went back to the original 1-3/4 inch ring.

Yesterday, I decided to repeat the experiment. It bothered me that such a small change could cause me so much trouble. If you do the math (Circumference = π * Diameter), 1/16th inch increase in diameter adds about 3/16th inch of circumference. That’s less than a quarter of an inch! It made no sense to me that my skin would be so upset by such a small change. So, I asked Mrs. Lion to let me put the 1-11/16 inch ring on. I did. After a night’s sleep and a day of work I was irritated again.

I can understand why so many guys feel the need to lube under the base ring. It turns out that the diameter of this ring is critical for comfort. Changes, even very small changes, can spell the difference between complete comfort and a lot of irritation. I don’t think there is a good way to predict exactly which size will work. From a comfort perspective, finding the largest ring that won’t let one of your balls escape on its own is probably the most likely candidate for lasting comfort.

Over time, if the device isn’t comfortable, the chances it stays on is small. If my Jail Bird caused me the irritation that the 1/16th inch smaller ring caused me, I am very sure I would stop being locked up in a chastity device. Yes, I might have tried lubricating cream. But the simple fact that I had to work to remain locked up would have been an energy-draining distraction from the device’s real purpose: sexual control.

By:
In: Mrs Lion Comments

Every so often we hit a rough patch where Lion worries that I’m not getting anything out of chastity and FLR. He questions things. Why do we do this? Why do we do that? Do you like this? Do you like that? Why do you like it? From time to time he’ll even ask why I love him. Of course it’s all insecurity, but in that moment he wants answers. Unfortunately, I don’t really have answers when put on the spot like that.

Generally we do things Lion wants to do. He’s come up with the idea and we either adopted it the way he thought of it or I put a spin on it to make it “better”. Now “better” can mean anything from hurting him more than he anticipated to making it palatable for me to do. It seems to me, in the beginning of his wearing diapers, we had the traditional “baby” kind with the adhesive tabs on the sides. I had to put them on because he needed to be laying down. There was no mention of my wiping him when he peed. Once he found the pull up kind of diaper, we used those. There was still never any mention of my wiping him off or actively changing him. It was palatable for me to do that. No mess on my part. The idea of his being in a diaper full time with me taking off the old one, wiping the pee off and putting on a new one is not something I want to entertain. I’ll makes comments about his cowboy wet diaper walk or tell him only babies wear diapers or give him playful swats on the butt to highlight his padding as my way of making it “better” by not letting him forget I’m making him wear the diapers.

Now, as a compromise to his recent diaper purchase, I will put the diaper on him and he will remove it. The wipes can be used if I need to clean him off to play with him while he’s been wearing a diaper. That way I’m still actively involved with it, but don’t have to deal with the wet diapers. And, after all, why should I have to sully myself with his mess? Me touch pee? Eeeewwwww. I’m in charge here. I don’t touch pee.

So what do I get out of all this chastity and FLR stuff anyway? Yes, I get a happy Lion. Blah, blah, blah. I’ve said it a million times. So what? Well, it’s true. But I also get something else out of it that’s a little bit selfish and maybe a lot immature. I get amusement watching Lion endure all the things that were his idea and listen to him whine and grumble.

                    Lion:  I don’t know why I asked to have the cage put back on. I liked it better when I was wild.
Mrs. Lion: Awwww, that’s too bad. Now you’re stuck wearing it. Darn agreements, anyway.

Lion:  I’ve been sitting in this wet diaper for an hour. I’m hot and stinky.
Mrs. Lion: I guess you better hurry up and pee again so you can change into a new diaper.

Now isn’t that amusing? Isn’t that worth the price of admission? I think so!