By:
In: Male Chastity

If you’ve been following along, Mrs. Lion and I have different views of my forced chastity. She sees it as something she does out of love for me because I want it. I see it as a new lifestyle where Mrs. Lion is in control of my sex life and some other stuff too. The problem, as I mentioned before can crop up when I decide I don’t like something and I want that something to stop. Since Mrs. Lion’s investment is in my happiness, not in controlling me, it makes sense for her to consider and then honor my request to stop. This runs counter to my deeper need for her control.

Initially, I told Mrs. Lion that my consent for caging me and all the other top/bottom activities we do was one way. Once I agree, I lose the right to revoke it. This is pretty common in the top/bottom universe. However, it’s kind of impractical as well. Can I really surrender my sexuality for the rest of my life with no possibility to modify my decision? Why should Mrs. Lion continue something that makes me unhappy? Her motivation from the start was to make me happier. You can see that this difference is bound to cause a problem or two at some point. Other couples attack this problem using some paperwork; a chastity contract. Until now I thought they made little sense since the caged male has surrendered control, how would he be able to enforce a contract. Similarly, if his keyholder wants to change the rules, by definition, she can.

So the issue is what does an agreement between caged male and keyholder  have to be. Some people provide a formal contract that spells out exactly what the rights and privileges of each party is. I asked Mrs. Lion if she would like that. Her answer is that she doesn’t need that. I then pointed out that on more than one occasion she has felt guilty when she forced me to wait longer than I wanted, or hurt me in some way. My point is that if I am very explicit in what I am asking her to do, she need  not feel guilty and, in fact, can find my distress funny since I  had asked for it.. She agreed to that. So we decided to be less formal, though I do like things specific. Here is our current agreement:

  1. I agree (and ask) Mrs. Lion (herein referred to as “keyholder” to keep me (herein referred to as “lion” to keep me locked in a chastity device continuously (24./7 except for play time, hygiene time, medical visits, as well as possible breaks for a reason the keyholder deems necessary) Until July 4, 2016. This time may be extended by mutual agreement, but can not under any circumstances be reduced. Keyholder agrees to this.
  2. Keyholder shall tease or otherwise sexually play with lion at least three times each week. The chastity device should be removed for at least one of these occasions each week.
  3. Lion explicitly requests spanking, spanking, bondage, cock and ball play, light humiliation and other BDSM activities lion has requested or participated in over the years.
  4. Keyholder agrees to honor lion’s safeword during such play.
  5. Lion agrees that he may not renegotiate any terms of this agreement, however, keyholder may, at her own discretion reduce or eliminate any number of play periods for disciplinary reasons.
  6. Keyholder agrees to consider any new activities requested by lion, but is under no obligation to provide them.
  7. Keyholder has sole discretion how often and in what manner lion my orgasm.
  8. Keyholder agrees to consistently discipline lion for breeches of any rulse she sets.

That’s my start of it. Mrs. Lion can comment and/or agree in a future post. Reader, did I miss anything?

 

 

By:
In: Male Chastity
male orgasm
Nothing is more frustrating than being taken to the very edge of an orgasm and left hanging.

Before I get to edging, I have to say that today is the day! I get to orgasm today after a 12 day wait. Mrs. Lion is going to ride me and I will see fireworks. More on our celebration tomorrow. Also of note, my renovated (shortened) cage is back. I will be reporting on that too. You can see me posing in it on the right. Click the image for a larger, color view.  On to today’s subject.

Edging is the act of masturbating a man until just before he ejaculates. Technically, you don’t have to get so close that one more stroke would make him come. You just need to get him into that three second zone that begins the male orgasm. You will learn to identify when he is at that point. Now, once he hits that point remove your hand. Give him a few seconds to come down. As soon as his breathing stabilizes, begin again. It won’t take long to get him almost coming. This is commonly called tease and deny. It is a very good way to assure your caged male can’t forget what he is missing. Regular (two or three times a week) edging will turn any male into putty. If you don’t stimulate him during his wait, he will begin losing interest in sex. The point of keeping him locked up and waiting is to harness the sexual energy all that frustration creates. You can convert his energy into pleasing you in any way you want. A male desperate to come will do nearly anything for release. His cage assures he can’t do it himself. He has to convince you to provide his release. If you like oral sex, he will be happy to lick you every day. He will rub your feet, lick your ass, do anything at all if it improves the odds he can release.

There is another, less known use of edging. Most men don’t even know this: repeated edging will make it impossible for him to orgasm (for a while). If you follow the instructions above over and over, eventually he will lose his erection and will not be able to get it back for quite a while. To allow him to remain hard, but impossible to orgasm, first edge him to the point he loses his erection entirely. Count how many times you edged him. Subtract two or three times and  you have how many times to repeat in order to prevent orgasm.

Why would you want to do this? Are you kidding? If you remove his ability to come but yet have him hard, you now have a human dildo that can please you without pleasing himself. One key area of male training is orgasm control. As a matter of fact, many men can still orgasm after the teasing, but their ability will be reduced. This is a perfect training ground. Tell him that you want him inside you and he may not come. If he comes, tell him he will be locked up without satisfaction for a long time  (you decide how long). Also, if he does have an “accident”, be sure to spank him severely immediately after he cleans you up. So, you are using two kinds of conditioning: you are helping him by reducing his ability to orgasm, and you are punishing him if he accidentally comes. This combination will eventually let him control his ejaculations without the edging. If, for some reason, he is a premature ejaculator and you can’t stop his accidents with spanking and long lock up, get some anesthetic ointment. Apply it just under the head of his penis about 15 minutes before you want him to please you. It may take some experimentation. Too much and he can’t get or stay hard; too little and he will have an accident. Have him apply it himself. Make it his responsibility to control his orgasms. Punish him if he fails, either by having an accident or not getting hard. This may seem cruel, but it isn’t. It’s exactly what the male chastity fantasy is all about: your control. Up until now I haven’t experienced the anesthetic, but I think that Mrs. Lion will add it to her arsenal when she wants to ride me between my orgasm dates.

If your male hasn’t experienced being edged until he can’t orgasm no matter what he does, you should consider giving him the experience. It was eye opening for me. I hadn’t really considered that I could get too much pleasure. More significantly, it dawned on me that even without the cage, Mrs. Lion can prevent me from coming. I don’t think she realized it either. It turns out that tease and deny is an extremely powerful tool for male control. Try it, you’ll like it.

By:
In: Male Chastity

Last night started with Lion wondering when we were going to get started with our activities. He said the day was wasting away. I told him I could always make him wait another day. He agreed that I could. But I’d told him that I would neither shorten nor lengthen this denial period. Besides, I wanted him to come.

I decided to start out with a spanking. I warmed him up with my hand and asked if my toy was hard? He maneuvered his penis so it was peeking out from under his balls between his legs so I could have access to it. I few swats to his buns. A little fondling of the balls and cock. Very nice. Finally I moved on to the nasty rubber paddle. I whomped his butt good. Toward the end I told him he had a series of hard swats coming and he wasn’t to move. He screamed into the pillows but managed to stay still. What a good boy!

When I let him roll over his erection was standing tall. I played with him a little while with my hand and my mouth before straddling him. This time I was wet for him. I guess I really wanted him to come. It didn’t take long for his hips to start bucking into me. I love that! And there was one happy Lion.

He licked me to orgasm afterwards. I’m not sure how much of himself he cleaned out of me. It doesn’t really matter. I was happy. He was happy. And I like having his come inside me.

A little while later we went outside to watch the fireworks people were setting off in the area. I liked our fireworks better!

Lion’s next wait time is five days. Sure it’s a shorter time, but no one said I have to make him wait a long time. Variety is the spice of life.

By:
In: Advice to caged males, Femdom, Lion's Journal, Male Control (training), Punishment, Sex
squeeze technique
The squeeze technique, originally described by Masters and Johnson is an effective way to stop an orgasm. Used in conjunction with tease and deny, it can help the male have more conscious control over when he orgasms.

Most of us (males) at one time or another have wished we could “hold off” to let our partner have her orgasm.  We’ve tried to think about math problems, sports scores, the weather, anything but sex. Usually we have been unsuccessful in our efforts. Until very recently I never thought I could really control when I come, much less prevent myself from coming altogether. However, as a caged male, it might be useful to know how to do this.

As wait times between orgasm grow, our keyholders may well grow impatient at the loss of the use of their toys: our cocks. Also, since tease and deny is an important part of the forced male chastity regimen, it would be more convenient if we lose our hair triggers so that accidents would be less likely to happen. All this makes sense to me, but I’m still not a fan. However, like other caged males, I don’t get a vote.

So what is this all about? Apparently, it is possible to exercise zen-like control over the orgasm reflex. Other caged males have done it. Tantric yoga also features male orgasm control exercises. It must be possible. The question is how to do it? In a prior post I mentioned using punishment for “accidents” to provide this training. Mrs. Lion said she will not beat that into me. I expect that aside from being distasteful to her, it isn’t very helpful for me either. We need a different strategy.

First, let’s consider the situations where I will need to exercise this control. There are two: when Mrs. Lion wants to ride me but does not want me to orgasm, and when she is teasing me to the edge and wants me to assure that I won’t have an accidental ruined orgasm. My initial thinking was to consider a lion “accident” the same way you consider a puppy’s accident on the rug. By punishing the puppy, she learns to hold her bladder and go outside. Well, that doesn’t really work well for the puppy. For me, all it would do would be to make me even more unhappy I failed.

We know that some tantric practitioners can voluntarily prevent orgasm no matter what the stimulus. That means theoretically I can do it too. But how? When I feel an orgasm coming on it is overpowering. I breathe hard and make some sounds that Mrs. Lion likes. She can read the signs and stops just short of the point of no return when she teases me. I don’t feel that I have any control to delay it at that point. But what about when I feel it building up. I have at least five seconds between that indescribable tingle and the point of no return. Is there something that I can do to distract me and prevent the accident?

I am very sure being trained to only orgasm when given permission isn’t important to Mrs. Lion. It probably sounds like one more “chore” in her lion training. In fact, for many males this may not even be something your keyholder cares about. In some cases, a keyholder will want frequent intercourse and needs to feel her male’s penis inside her. This is complicated if he has an orgasm date that is still in the future. In cases like this it would be helpful if he could hold off until his times. In vanilla relationship it is always nice if the male can wait until his partner orgasms. However, would that vanilla partner be willing to help her male hold off long enough to satisfy her?

Let’s assume that it makes sense to learn to hold off. Masters and Johnson developed a technique that can effectively help a male stop an orgasm. It was developed to help train males not to ejaculate prematurely. In our context, it is an easy, effective way to help the male gain some control. During a tease and deny session, it’s an interesting variation that will serve to frustrate and educate at that same time. This is something I would like to experience if only to find out how it feels. The image above explains this simple concept.

Another easy technique is to use a method to desensitize the penis so that much more stimulation is needed to get off. This is easily done with desensitizing creams (usually Lidocaine 4 or 5 percent). A small amount applied on the underside of the penis, just below the head can work wonders. Apply and wait 15 minutes before sex. Voila! It may take some experimentation to get the right amount. Too much and he won’t be able to get or stay hard; too little and, well you know.

Another fairly simple technique is to simply wear out the male’s orgasm reaction. I mentioned this earlier in the post. It’s fun and very effective. It will take some experimentation to work it out, but once you do, your male won’t be able to orgasm at all and you can have all the fun you want.

From my perspective, the most important benefit of learning orgasm control is that it is yet another way the keyholder has taken control of her male; caged or uncaged. I have had a sort of academic interest in this. If Mrs. Lion wants to try, of course I will do my best to learn. If she doesn’t, it’s fine with me. There may be an occasional accident for which I do expect some discipline. But she needn’t expend any energy training me this way for my benefit. This is one thing she should try only if it pleases her.