As a male, I have to acknowledge that it all comes down to sex. We, males, are programmed by nature to be in heat all of the time. Even when we aren’t physically able to ejaculate, those endocrine hormones keep us sexually focused. Women see this as either a potentially dangerous flaw or a lever they can use to control us.
Yesterday, I wrote about how my sex drive makes me willingly accept punishment. (“Why I Need To Be Punished“) My clever lioness knows that if she spanks me regularly, the sexual connection is maintained at full strength. I’m not only obedient because sex can be withheld, but because if I’m not, I get a painful spanking that I am powerless to resist.
Granted, the way we express this is on the extreme side. Smart vanilla women use this power in more subtle ways. Tell the truth, even if you are in a vanilla marriage, sex is used as a way to get male obedience. We know that a pissed-off wife isn’t going to get us off. Masturbation is a weak defense that is only effective for a relatively short time. Surrender is inevitable.
If this power is abused, big problems can result. We have limits. Push a male over that edge, and he becomes unpredictable. He could seek sex outside the marriage. He might get angry and potentially violent. As any lion tamer, like Mrs. Lion, knows that control has to be exercised carefully. Training is a gradual process. I’ve learned to fear her retribution. Yes, I could overpower her. I wouldn’t dare.
An even more powerful control comes from love. I can’t imagine my life without my lioness. I need to feel her power. I depend on her to help me keep my perspective. We’ve been together nearly twenty years. She knows me better than I know myself. I think that the survival of any species partially depends on a balance between the sexes. Most mammals offset the difference in physical strength between males and females by giving the males a strong inability to attack a female. She can bite him and bully him. He won’t retaliate. Sound familiar?
Mrs. Lion can reward me with sexual attention. She chooses not to take advantage of this option. I get sex regardless of my behavior. She keeps me on the straight and narrow with her paddles instead of her teeth. It works. Sex is a physical glue that assures we stay close. It works very well. Oh yes, it sure does.