Lion was watching reruns of Match Game this morning and in the bonus round, the phrase was “Queen of ____”. I said “the Nile” but then the old joke of queen of denial popped into my head. I told him I’m the queen of denial. I deny him orgasms. For the past few days, I’ve denied him everything.
I picked up our grocery order on the way home and I was unloading onto the porch when the door opened. Lion thought it was Stanley Steamer coming to clean the carpet again. Nope. Just me. I unload the car so I can avoid having psycho puppy trying to get out the door as much as possible. Normally I use the back door. I put the bags on the deck where she can see me but not get out. Anyway, Stanley Steamer was about to show up. I was trying to unpack groceries, deal with the jumping dog and navigate around Lion. Then I was dealing with Lion in the middle of the kitchen trying to put dinner in the oven. Sometimes there’s too much traffic in the kitchen. It’s frustrating.
We talked about spanking since the spanking bench was still in the hall. He said he thought I put it there intentionally to send him a message. I did put it there intentionally. I needed it out of the way while I waxed him. It was only afterwards that I realized it sent a message. I thought maybe it was a good idea to make use of it since it was out. And I fully intended to spank him. Then we ate dinner.
On Sunday, Lion’s tummy was off. Last night, mine was. I can stand a certain amount of pain. I can stand it when my stomach is upset. What I hate is nausea. Where did it come from? Things were fine. And then they weren’t. Yuck! It dragged on for the better part of the night. Lion said that’s how he felt the night before. He thought it was from something he ate. I have no idea what triggered mine.
So for another night, we did nothing. It’s difficult to snuggle when you’re afraid to move because it might set things off. I guess the good thing is that I still haven’t moved the spanking bench. It’s in the hallway, taunting Lion. Every time he goes to the kitchen, he’ll see it. Part of him will be excited about being spanked and part of him will dread it. Poor, conflicted Lion. He certainly won’t be conflicted once he’s strapped in and that first swat hits.
I won’t promise we’ll do anything tonight. That’s like playing with fire. We’ll see how we feel. It’s no use forcing things.